Catch Us the Foxes

by Nicola West

  ‘I’m sorry,’ I replied, turning towards him. ‘It’s just – this whole thing, it’s –’

  ‘Utterly terrifying?’

  Before I had a chance to reply, I slammed my foot on the brakes.

  ‘For fuck’s sake!’ Jarrah spat, as I instinctively put my arm across his chest to stop him from propelling forward.

  I hadn’t been able to see what was ahead as we’d rounded the blind corner. Fortunately, we hadn’t been travelling fast. Still, it caught us both by surprise.

  The farmer in the middle of the road stared angrily at us, and I felt like it was warranted. After all, I’d seen the signs – the big yellow ones with pictures of cows – and still hadn’t slowed down. I held my hand up in an apologetic wave, and he shook his head and muttered something before turning back to the cattle slowly meandering across the road.

  ‘Ugh,’ Jarrah groaned, looking at the snaking trail of cows in the field beside us. ‘We’re gonna be here all bloody day!’

  ‘You were the one who said we should go this way,’ I pointed out as I turned the engine off.

  ‘Can we at least leave the friggin’ air on?’

  ‘You can wind your window down if you want. But it’s gonna reek of cow shit.’

  ‘Ugh,’ he repeated. ‘I hate this fucking hellhole so much.’

  ‘Spare a thought for the suckers who are still stuck here. We can’t all be modern-art wunderkinds.’

  ‘Don’t give me that shit – I paid my dues. I did the whole couch-surfing thing. Hell, I sucked dick for free accommodation.’

  I visibly grimaced, and he laughed.

  ‘Okay, maybe the accommodation was an added bonus, but the sentiment is there. You’ve gotta do what you gotta do. If you truly wanted out of this place, you’d have done it by now.’

  ‘Fuck you,’ I intoned, crossing my arms against my chest.

  ‘Speaking of sucking dick. You still BFFs with that cutie? What’s-his-name… uh, I wanna say, Dan?’

  ‘Yep.’

  A cow had stopped in the middle of the road and was staring right at me. Without warning, it lifted up its tail and took an almighty dump on the bitumen. The farmer was unbothered, lazily swatting flies around his head.

  ‘He single?’

  ‘I think so.’

  ‘He come out yet?’

  I turned to face Jarrah. ‘Dan’s not gay.’

  He burst into laughter, and I felt frustrated on Dan’s behalf.

  ‘Seriously, he’s not.’

  He continued laughing. ‘How the hell does his supposed best friend not know he’s gay?’

  ‘Because he’s not.’

  ‘Oh, okay,’ Jarrah said, nodding overdramatically before miming zipping his lips. ‘I getcha.’

  I was getting sick of the rigmarole. ‘He’s not, Jarrah. Seriously.’

  ‘Sure,’ Jarrah continued, still nodding campily. ‘Yeah, I’m sure that time we fucked back in the day was just a big, totally straight accident, right?’

  I blinked in disbelief.

  CHAPTER 48

  ‘Wait,’ Jarrah said, his eyes scanning my face as his brows furrowed in confusion. ‘Shit, you genuinely didn’t know?’

  I shook my head.

  ‘How could you not know?’ Jarrah asked, bewildered. ‘You’re his best friend!’

  The temperature in the car was slowly rising. Even with the windows closed the smell of manure lingered in the air. I wiped the sweat from the top of my lip and leaned my head against the window. Jarrah stared at me expectantly.

  ‘He tells people he’s straight,’ I said, staring out at the cows. ‘Everyone in town thinks he’s gay, but he says he’s not.’

  Jarrah continued staring at me, seemingly puzzled.

  ‘I dunno,’ I said, lifting my head up and slowly shaking it. ‘I guess I thought I was doing the right thing by being the only person who actually took him at his word.’

  There was more to it than that, of course. Dan’s so-called ‘red flags’ had made me feel better about myself growing up. While the rest of the town whispered about his lack of interest in girls, I’d assumed he was like me. Not straight, not gay – just nothing.

  The fact that he was practically the only guy my age who hadn’t ever tried to crack on to me had been the cherry on top of our friendship. I felt safe and comfortable around him. But, beyond that, being friends with him changed the way I thought about myself. I wasn’t alone in my detachment. There was someone else in that tiny hole of a town who was just like me. Or so I had thought.

  ‘I don’t get it,’ Jarrah said, shaking his head. ‘He’s a grown-arse adult now, why doesn’t he just come out?’

  ‘You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me, right?’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘Think about it, Jarrah. Who the fuck would ever come out in this town after what happened to you?’

  He didn’t answer me, but I could tell my words had shaken him. There was something distant in his eyes, something closed-off. We both sat silently, staring at the cows as they moved like lemmings across the road. Their pace was glacial.

  ‘This is getting fucking ridiculous!’ Jarrah snapped. He pointed at the farmer, whose back was still turned to the LandCruiser. ‘He can make them go faster than that, he’s just being a prick and punishing us for driving too fast.’

  ‘How exactly do you expect him to make the cows go faster?’

  ‘I don’t know. A whip? A cattle prod?’

  I rolled my eyes again and yawned. How was I still so sleepy?

  ‘I know what’ll move ’em,’ Jarrah said, propelling his hand towards the horn.

  Thankfully, I was able to grab his fingers before he made contact.

  ‘Don’t even think about it,’ I said, squeezing his hand harder than I should have. ‘You’ll spook them. And then they’ll stop producing milk, and the farmer will put a bloody bullet between their eyes.’

  ‘I don’t give a flyin’ fuck about Daisy,’ he said, reaching towards the horn once more.

  I bent his fingers back. ‘I will break your fucking fingers if you try again.’

  He snatched his hand back. ‘Jesus Christ, Marlowe. It was a bloody joke!’

  I raised my eyes back to the road and noticed that the farmer was staring at me. There was something about the look in his eyes that felt disconcerting. I wondered if he was a relative of the Williams family, and whether his name had been on Lily’s list.

  Did he know who I was?

  Did he know what we were about to do?

  A feeling of dread wrenched at my body and then the farmer broke into a twisted smile.

  He knew. And soon they would all know, too. I was sure of it.

  The last of the cows slowly trundled across the road, and we were finally able to continue our journey. When we passed the farmer, climbing back into his ute, he looked at me with that same manic smile and wiggled his fingertips in an odd sort of wave. There was a sense of finality to it that put me on edge. Though, much to my frustration, Jarrah hadn’t seemed to notice.

  After a few minutes of silence, he turned the radio on – without asking – and spent the remainder of the trip flipping through stations while bemoaning the quality of the local content. It was mainly vapid breakfast shows where the shrieky hosts shouted over each other, and local bogans called in to win movie tickets to the latest Hollywood drivel. The only music came in the form of jingles for used car dealerships and hardware stores. It was an aural nightmare.

  There was fog on the mountain and the higher we drove, the more we encountered. I eased the LandCruiser into the white pockets slowly and was thankful that they were always short-lived. My dad had insisted on me learning to drive in all weather conditions and on all types of terrain, so I was quite used to navigating in poor visibility. Jarrah, on the other hand, seemed utterly bewildered by his surroundings and would mumble under his breath every time the car was engulfed.

  ‘Fuck this spooky Silent Hill shit,’ he muttered to himself, wrapping
his arms around his body.

  I chuckled. ‘Pyramid Heads are the least of our concern,’ I said, my eyes still firmly trained on the road. It was meant to be reassuring but, the second the words left my lips, I realised it wasn’t.

  ‘What the fuck are we supposed to do if we can’t see our bloody hands in front of our faces?’ he asked.

  My eyes quickly jumped to the clock on the dash and then back to the road. ‘It’s still early. Worse comes to worst we’ll just have to sit tight and wait until the sun burns the fog off.’

  He shook his head and tried to change the radio station once more. The breakfast show hosts were being drowned in static the higher we climbed, and he flipped through as if the brash sounds of their conversations brought him some form of comfort. In contrast, I welcomed the serenity of the white noise.

  CHAPTER 49

  Even through the smattering of fog, I could tell that Saddleback’s car park was deserted. There was likely no one around for miles. Still, we took a cautious loop around the phone towers at the top to make sure there was no one lurking in the mist.

  ‘Is that it?’ Jarrah asked, pointing through the fog towards the western gate.

  ‘Yeah. Let’s just pray the lock’s the same or we’re in for a bugger of a walk.’

  I drove past and Jarrah looked at me, perplexed.

  ‘Uh, Lo? Where we going?’

  ‘I’ll drop you off at the car park. You can keep a lookout while I try to get the gate open. Let me know if you see anyone, okay? We can’t risk a ranger or someone else seeing what we’re up to.’

  ‘And how exactly am I supposed to let you know?’

  ‘There’s this great new device called a mobile phone. I really think they’re gonna take off.’

  ‘Fat lot of good a mobile is when there’s no reception, eh?’

  ‘We’re literally next to the phone towers!’

  ‘Don’t take my word for it.’ He shrugged, before passing me my phone from the tray in the dash.

  I slowed the LandCruiser to a stop and peered at the screen. Sure enough, I had no bars.

  ‘That doesn’t even make sense!’

  ‘This thing got a CB radio or something?’ Jarrah asked, squinting at the dials on the LandCruiser’s dashboard.

  ‘Jesus Christ, I’m not that bloody country!’

  ‘So that means…’ Jarrah trailed off.

  ‘We have no way of contacting anyone while we’re up here. Fuck.’

  Jarrah leaned his head against the headrest and let out a long sigh.

  ‘Having second thoughts?’ I asked. I sure as hell was.

  ‘The fog – now this. It’s less than optimal, to say the least.’

  ‘Yeah.’

  He ran his hand over his shaved head before turning to me. ‘Why don’t we at least try the key? Then decide from there?’

  ‘So, what? If it doesn’t work, it’s a sign?’

  ‘Yeah. Something like that. These things do tend to come in threes.’

  I reversed the car back up to the gate, pointed the LandCruiser’s nose towards the opening and turned the engine off. The fog moved quickly up there on the peak. One second you’d be shrouded; the next it was gone.

  ‘Here,’ Jarrah said. As if sensing my reluctance, he held his hand out. ‘Gimme the key. I’ll try the gate.’

  ‘Thanks,’ I replied, before digging it out of my pocket and passing it to him.

  He took a deep breath and opened the door, before stepping down onto the ground and slamming it shut. Even in the short time the door was open, I could tell how cool it was outside. The air that entered the car smelled fresh and wet and seemed to slide down my throat like a menthol cough drop. I wound my window down. Somewhere in the fog, a lone bird called – a peculiar creaking noise that sounded like someone winding a spring.

  My eyes flicked back to Jarrah. He walked in front of the LandCruiser and completely disappeared from sight. It was like he had been engulfed by a cloud.

  A single thought entered my mind: Drive off without him.

  I felt my fingers tense against the car keys, still in the ignition, as Jarrah reappeared and kneeled down in front of the gate. Before I knew it, the gate was swinging open and a wide and inviting path seemed to part the fog.

  There was a strange feeling somewhere in my chest. It took me a while to recognise it as disappointment. I’d been secretly hoping the key wouldn’t work.

  Jarrah stood up and gave an animated shrug as if to say, ‘So much for that excuse’. He began walking back towards the car, and I tried to think of a way to convince him to leave. Another pocket of fog engulfed him. It was as if he’d been wiped off the face of the earth.

  When he finally reappeared, it was like I was looking at an entirely different person.

  Jarrah stood frozen in the centre of the road, his face mask-like. He was staring off into the distance, somewhere behind the LandCruiser. I watched as he slowly raised the palm of his hand – signalling me to stay put – before lifting his index finger to his lips.

  Just as a look of concern washed over his face, the LandCruiser was engulfed in fog. I couldn’t see anything but whiteness outside the windows. The only sound I could hear was my pulse in my ears. When the fog finally cleared, Jarrah was gone.

  ‘Go, now,’ a voice hissed beside my window, causing me to clasp my hands over my mouth.

  ‘Get out of sight,’ Jarrah continued. ‘I’ll catch up.’

  Before I’d had a chance to even process what he’d said, he’d run off into the fog, back towards the car park. I turned the engine on, grimacing at the sound, and looked at the open gate before me. The only way forward was through the gate and into the rainforest.

  As if sensing my hesitation, the fog cleared in front of me, revealing the path. And yet, all I could see in the rearview mirror was white. Jarrah was nowhere in sight. I eased the LandCruiser up onto the fire trail and drove through the gate.

  The fire trail was muddier than I’d expected, and I began to worry about getting bogged. I’d driven on similar terrain in the past, but only ever with my dad and the assurance that he could help push it out if needed. No offence to Jarrah, but I doubted I could say the same for him.

  Even if that were an exaggeration on my father’s part, at least with him I knew that a four-wheel drive full of cops could be radioed in and be there within minutes. Not only did Jarrah and I have no way of contacting anyone, but we also couldn’t risk doing it in the first place. It was essential no one knew what we were doing up there.

  I carefully drove over the muddy tracks and pulled the LandCruiser to the side when the path curved. I turned around to ensure it was protected by the tree line, though I don’t know why I bothered. It certainly wasn’t like anyone there would have been able to see me through the fog anyway.

  I turned the engine off, but almost immediately regretted it. I didn’t want the sound to draw attention, but I also wanted to be able to get out of there as quickly as possible if I needed to. Behind me, the fog still swirled.

  How long would I have to wait for Jarrah?

  What if he never came back?

  I tried to push the thoughts out of my mind, feeling my chest tighten with anxiety. What had he heard out there? A car? A person?

  I decided to roll my window down to see if I could hear anything. That icy mountain air caressed my face and goosebumps crept down my spine. I could hear the rainforest – bird calls, rustling leaves, the wind – but nothing else.

  Then there was a loud scraping sound somewhere behind the LandCruiser.

  The gate.

  Someone was closing the gate.

  And I no longer had the key.

  CHAPTER 50

  I was trapped. Panic gripped my body as my mind struggled to think of a solution. Should I reverse back up there? Shout out that someone was still on the trail and needed to be able to get back out? Or drive – drive as fast as I could away from the person who was trying to trap me?

  What if it was the farmer? Had
he followed us up there in his ute, obscured by the fog? Or had he called someone from Lily’s list? Michael, Mark, my dad?

  I could run. Away from the LandCruiser and into the rainforest. I had supplies. I could hide or even loop back around to one of the lookouts. But I might get lost or trip and break my leg in the fog. No, it was best to stay with the car. At least Jarrah could find me then.

  I cursed myself for not bringing a weapon and quickly scanned the LandCruiser’s interior for something. There was nothing except Jarrah’s visor and my backpack full of useless non-lethal objects.

  I wondered if Jarrah’s bag had something before realising that it was gone. But why would he have taken it with him if he was only opening the gate? I felt my stomach drop and choked back a gasp from my quivering lips.

  It was him. He hadn’t heard anything. He’d just wanted to lock me in. To trap me here.

  But why? Why would he do that?

  And then, it hit me. My initial instinct had been correct. The first anonymous message about the journals had been a trap. Just one with a slightly slower payoff. He’d built up my trust. Spun his lies. And lured me to that fucking rainforest.

  For them. He was one of them.

  It all made sense. Why he’d come back after all these years. Why he had Lily’s journals. Why he’d been so insistent that we go into the rainforest. And his success – the profiles in the papers and photos in the social pages – the involvement of Owen’s editor was proof the cult had ties to the media.

  So that’s what it took to escape this town – you had to sell your soul.

  I felt like I was going to vomit. My hands were shaking, and tears were streaming down my cheeks. I was on the brink of hyperventilating. How could I have been so blind?

  I fought to get my breathing under control and the LandCruiser was once again swallowed by the fog. And then, I heard them – footsteps approaching the car. I turned to face the passenger door and lunged towards the lock.