by Beck, J. L.
I’m dying inside to tell him it’s game on, but at the same time, I’m confused as to what he’s up to.
“Assignments are due Monday. Anything that is late with be reduced by ten percent each day,” our professor explains to the class. I almost miss what he’s saying because I feel a hand trace against my thigh under the table.
I glare at Corey. The asshole would try something here. I brush his hand off, scooting closer to Declan. A fire burns fiercely in Corey’s eyes… I thrive off of it, and my heart beat increases, all the blood in me pooling everywhere but my brain.
“You’re playing a very dangerous game, love,” he warns, his eyes never leaving mine.
“I know.”
The professor continues to talk, but all I can think about is getting out of here as fast as I can the second he dismisses us. Well, that and the way Corey’s fingers feel trailing over my jean clad thigh…
“I know you’re thinking about it….” he utters, his teeth biting into his bottom lip. Fuck, I can feel my ovaries exploding already.
“Is asshole bothering you?” Declan asks, his voice the reasoning I need to remind me that this is a very different side of Corey. He has always been aggressive and possessive, but now it’s as if he won’t take no for an answer. It’s as if he’s determined to show me why we are better together than apart.
I direct my attention to Declan, wondering when the professor is going to start bitching because we’re talking so loudly.
“Don’t…” I start to say, but am interrupted by a caveman, AKA Corey- fucking-Winchester.
“Didn’t I tell you once before that she’s mine?” Corey menacingly questions. His eyebrow is raised at Declan, and I feel like I’m in the middle of a UFC fight that’s about to occur.
“Let’s not do this here,” I plead, anxiety filling my voice. The last thing we need is to be kicked out of class.
“Didn’t I tell you once before that real men don’t leave their women when they find out they’re pregnant? It doesn’t matter what kind of bullshit you’re going through in your life, she and that baby come first. Always.” There’s a finalization in the way Declan says always.
And like the idiot I am, I sit there like a gazelle between two male lions whose faces are filled with an all-consuming rage. I know why Corey feels the way he does, but I’m puzzled by the way Declan is acting.
“Stop!” I demand, turning to Corey. My gaze swings around the room as a small amount of classmates begin observing our argument.
He gives me a bewildered look before saying, “You want me to stop? Something tells me that’s doubtful, baby… As for that asshole over there, he needs to take a couple steps back before I make him.” Corey’s words are directed at Declan even though he’s looking at me.
“Corey, just stop. You’re making a scene. A really huge…” I can’t finish getting the words out of my mouth before Declan is up and around me, his fist aimed right at Corey’s face.
Gasps surround us, including my own, as everyone watches in horror. Whispers ensue as the professor takes notice of the whole predicament.
A hit lands on Corey’s gorgeous face, and I cringe at the very thought of bruises marring his face. Then I do something I never thought I would do again: I defend him.
Standing, I separate Declan and Corey by putting my body between them. If they’re going to hit each other, they’re going to have to go through me first.
“Stop!” I yell. Declan lowers his bloody fist, and I look over to examine Corey. His nose is bleeding, and he has a cut on his lip. Declan looks as if he isn’t hit at all, but there’s a darkness in his eyes that I can’t describe.
“I…. I’m sorry…” Declan sputters as he turns around, grabs his stuff, and runs out of the class. I stand there, stunned by everything that just occurred.
“Mr. Winchester, Ms. Jones, I would like you to leave class for the rest of the day.”
With every class member staring at me, I pick up my shit and walk out the doors with Corey directly behind me.
“You know this all could have been avoided…” His voice echoes off the walls and penetrates my brain.
I continue to walk away, my pace picking up. It does me no good, though, because in a few short strides, he’s directly in front of me.
“Are you listening to me? This all could have been avoided. If you wanted me to know what it felt like to have my heart ripped out, all you had to do was say so.”
“What would the point of that had been then?” I question, just on the edge of breaking.
“It would have been easier than going through all of this,” he fumes, gesturing to whatever this is.
“No. It would have just been easier had you believed what I said, had you just walked away like you planned to.” The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them.
The anger is evident on his face, and I find myself backing away from him, not out of fright, but because I don’t want to trap myself. I’ve learned my lesson more than once. Never again.
“You don’t mean that, and we both know it…” And then his lips are on mine. They eat at any and all insecurities I have. They beg me for forgiveness without a word being said. His hands delve into my hair, and I instinctively grab onto his shoulders pulling him in closer.
I don’t even care that I’m no longer holding my books or that there are people who could be walking by and seeing us. All I see and feel in that moment are Corey and the love he has for me. Then, as if a cord in my mind snaps me back to life, I pull away from him, breathing heavily.
“I can’t do this with you, Corey.” The words barely surface, but I know they register in his mind as fury transforms his face.
“You can, Mimi. I know you want this. Us.” His jaw is clenched, his eyes blazing.
I pull away even more, putting more distance between us. “No…” I shake my head. I don’t want to say no to him. If anything, I want him to kiss me again, to kiss me forever.
“Yes. Deny me all you want. Tell me you hate me, scratch me, smack me, yell at me… Do whatever the fuck you have to do, but never, and I mean never, give up on us.” His words are definite. They’re like a punch to my stomach. How can he say these things to me now? After everything that we have been through? After all the hurtful, gut-wrenching words that have been spoken between us?
“You do not get to tell me how I should feel. You do not get to be the one person I would do anything for, especially when I’m the one you gave up on.” My wrath can be found in every single word that leaves my mouth, and my tongue tingles with more words that need to be said.
“In my heart, I never really gave up on you, Mimi; I never totally gave up on us. I fucked up. I’ve made a complete and utter ass of myself. I’ve made a disaster of our love, of your heart. Let me tell you something, though. In the wake of every disaster, there is a beautiful aspect to it. There’s a rainbow after a relentless downpour, a sun peeking over the horizon after a dust storm. After this disaster is fixed, I know that you and our baby will be my beautiful aspect,” Corey says with such a raw sincerity in his voice.
“None of that matters…” I respond, completely confused by his admission.
“It does. It fucking does, and we both know it. Had you not been the piece that held us together when I was wrong and hateful, we wouldn’t even be here now. Do you ever wonder why we keep being pushed together? Why, no matter how much anger and hate surrounds us, we find ourselves back to where it all started?” I shake my head, tears threatening to fall from my eyes.
“It didn’t work, Corey, because no matter how hard I held on, you walked away.”
He takes a determined step toward me, and it’s as if I feel my world and walls crumbling. It’s as if I see nothing but him - my future with him, our baby, our love.
His lips descend on mine again, and he owns me. A kiss that captures all our emotions is felt in every pore of my body. The message is sent to my heart loudly and clearly. My heart beats forcefully in my ears as he nips at my lip
s, gently begging me to open to him.
I do, and the moment that he slips himself into my mouth, I intensely feel the depths of his love. It’s as if one simple kiss can heal all the wounds. As if one kiss can explain everything without words. I don’t know what tomorrow holds, but I know that if I give up on Corey, I might as well be giving up on myself. There is nowhere else I would rather be than with him.
He pulls away from me, and I’m left breathless begging for more. “I will never walk away from you; I will never leave. If you thought it was going to be that easy to get rid of me, you have another thing coming. I know whatever is going on in here,” he gestures to my head, “is stressing you out. But know this, Mimi-fucking-Jones, I love you with every beat of my heart. Every fucking beat of my heart and every thought I have reflect back to you. It’s always been you.”
“Can’t you see it’s been you who I have loved all along? I LOVE YOU, MIMI JONES!” He practically screams it so everyone can hear it, and I think that’s the point. He’s proving he’s not afraid of anyone knowing, that he’s not afraid to love and be loved in return.
“Shhh,” I hiss, trying to get him to shut up.
“No way. I love you! You. And not one damn person is going to tell me otherwise, including yourself!” he yells yet again, his smile growing bigger and bigger.
“Stop,” I mumble, trying to shield my face from the inquisitive eyes.
“No… you stop,” he counters, gripping my chin to look up at him. His brown eyes bleed into my green ones.
“I’ll stop when you stop…” he says discreetly. It’s right then that I realize he figured it out.
“How did you know?” I question, my hands going straight to my hips.
Corey rubs his jaw as if he actually has to think about it. “It all made sense to me. I’ve known you my whole life, so I knew there was no way you could walk away from me when the very look in your eyes when you ordered me to leave told me otherwise. Yeah, my heart was broken, and I was crying like a pussy whipped guy, but I knew. I knew I had to be strong to carry the weight of us…at least until you were strong enough to come back to me.”
I close my eyes and take deep breaths through my nose. He knows. He figured it out. I should be thrilled, over the moon even, but I’m not because I don’t know if he got the point. I don’t know if he fully comprehends how much he hurt me, hurt us.
“I’m far from perfect, but I can’t take back what was said and done. I can only move forward and be the person I want to be. Forgive me, Mimi. Forgive me for being the asshole I truly am. Please be my reason to thrive and move forward because without you, life just isn’t worth living.”
His voice soothes me, his words push the broken pieces of my heart back together, mending them. There will always be a tiny hole there, reminding me of the hurt caused, but for now I want to focus on healing that hole, on making it what it used to be.
“I… I forgive you,” I stutter in between tears. Stupid hormones.
Then all hell breaks loose as I watch him run down the hall screaming how much he loves me. I’m embarrassed to the bone, but at the same time I’m loving the fact that he can so freely tell others.
He’s free… So I can be too.
Sweet Forgiveness
Corey
I feel as if I’m on cloud nine, as if I’ve left earth and have been thrown out into space. I thought I had lost Mimi, not once but twice. Had I known it would just take a bottle of Jack and some self-soothing to figure out what to do, I would’ve done it a long time ago.
Now I find myself lying in bed next to my beautiful girl, listening to her soft, steady breathing. Her curls are all over the place, and the bottom of her round stomach is showing out the bottom of her shirt.
I tell myself this is real, that I still have her, as I skim over her legs with my fingers. Her skin is so soft, so fucking soft. Just the simplest touch causes my dick to spring to life.
I have to push those thoughts away - they’re some dirty ass thoughts - in order to keep touching her. Her breaths are short, and her face is peaceful.
I forgive you…
Those three words keep replaying in my mind over and over again. I never once thought about what forgiveness meant. What I did to her isn’t something that can be considered huge, not in the realm of things that are done in this day and age, but it was still hurtful and it caused problems.
To forgive people for doing something to you is a huge step. It is giving them a second chance, despite knowing what they did and what they are capable of doing. It is basically putting yourself in the line of danger all over again because of a belief you have in them. It is forgiving them for what they did, but never forgetting it. It is moving on and learning not to dwell on the hate. Mimi is strong for being able to do all these things. She is brilliant and so damn strong.
Most of all, she is mine, and I will never make the mistake of not showing her that again.
My eyes scan over her body until I make my way up to her face, her magnificent fucking face. She is so much more than I ever expected to have in my life. I have been dealt a shitty hand, but she makes it easier. She makes me want to be a better person.
I wrap my finger around a piece of her hair. It’s so soft and delicate. She is like a flower, an incredibly feisty, angry flower that can give you hives if you pull its petals too hard.
“I’m impressed you could keep yourself out from between my legs,” a very sleepy voice says. Her eyes are still closed as she’s relishing my simple touches.
“It wasn’t without major resistance, I’ll tell you that,” I murmur softly. Looking at her lying next to me, I know I found love. I know that I will never find anyone else who will be able to handle my asshole tendencies.
“Resistance? I wasn’t aware you had any of that,” she says coyly, a smile tugging at her lips. One of her green eyes pops open, as if she’s attempting to adjust to the morning light that’s filtering in through the bedroom window.
“I don’t, well, not usually…” I say pausing, “but I knew you needed some sleep, and my needs could wait.” As I mouth my words against her skin, a layer of goose bumps rushes across her arms and shoulder, and I lay a kiss against her collar bone.
“Needs. Now they’re considered needs? Since when did you have needs?” she enquires curiously.
“Oh, well… They turned into needs about,” I ponder the thought for a moment, “a year ago, when some stuck up bitch thought it would be a smart idea to fuck with me.” I give her a wink and an eruption of laughter ensues.
“By stuck up bitch, you mean me, right?” she grumbles. I nod my head yes, all the blood in my body drifting south as thoughts of taking her against the wall, counter, floor, anywhere I can, assault my mind.
I reach out, clutching her body softly, as I lay kisses across her shoulders and chest. Her breath hitches, and her heart beat accelerates.
“What mischievousness are you up to, Corey?” she ponders, her eyebrow raising. If she thinks that words will do what’s on my mind justice, she has another thing coming. I plan on showing her by using my hands, fingers, lips, tongue… You get the idea, right?
“Nothing that I haven’t always been up to,” I innocently answer, lifting her shirt as I lick a small path over her belly. The belly that holds our baby. My heart fills with love and adoration as I stare at her. I can feel it fluttering as if it’s going to burst from my chest at any second and fly away.
Her hand comes up to cup my cheek, her eyes seeking mine. I can see the love in them, the strength and faith that she has for me.
“I love you. That has never changed, not through all the bullshit, the hate, the words, or the pranks. It’s always been you.”
We look at one another as if nothing has changed, as if we didn’t both break one another’s hearts.
“I know,” I hum against her skin as I pull her sleep shorts down. Once they’re out of the way, I grip her tiny red thong and pull it off as well, whipping it to the floor as I tear off my own clo
thes.
I look up at her for reassurance. Whatever I do to her now, there will be no going back.
“You’re mine,” I state, breathing against her pussy. A gasp leaves her lips as she parts them to take a breath. I smile knowing the power I have over her. She says nothing, so my fingers part her folds, and I give her a swift lick straight down the middle. Her hips press upward as if she isn’t getting enough, and I’m sure she’s not since my touches are feather light….
“You’re mine,” I growl against her pussy, giving her another lick with far much more pressure. Her hips buck, and her breaths come in hard. I can read her body better than she can read her own.
A small whimper leaves her lips, her soft pink lips. “Who do you belong to?” I demand, grasping her hips firmly to make sure I don’t put any pressure on the baby.
She stays silent, and I admire her resilience in not speaking. She has always been stubborn. I slide one finger into her and find her soaked to the core, ready for me. My dick lifts in approval as I force myself to come down. She will give in before I take her.
I push more firmly, giving her only one finger. I drive it in hard and pull it out slowly, making sure she sits right on the edge, never getting close to what she wants.
“Please, Corey….” she implores, her voice so beautiful… Her eyes are half mast, and her breasts move with every slide of my finger. It’s mesmerizing.
“You know what I want,” I say, gritting my teeth. She’s making it impossibly hard to not slam into her so I can hear her screams and pants of joy as I bring both of us to the finish line.
I slow my pace, leaving just the tip of my finger inside her and suck her clit into my mouth. Her legs immediately come up to hold my head into place as her fingers dive into my hair, pulling at it.
“Yes… Fuck yes…” she moans, just on the brink of falling off that ledge.
“Who do you belong to?” I demand into her pussy, my tongue sliding over her clit slowly. I know the pace is torturous, but when she comes, she will know that her body, soul, and mind belong to me. I will never give up on her again; I plan to show her just that with every, kiss, lick, and stroke.
