Beneath the Scars

by Joan Fennell Carringer

  By the time Devon finally pulled into Josie’s driveway much later, it was totally dark except for the glow of the moon. As he stopped the truck, they were chatting and laughing.

  All of a sudden, without warning, Marna shrieked. Her breathing became shallow and she started gasping for air.

  “Marna? Marna, what’s wrong?”

  She was staring out the window, pointing. “F…….F…….Fire!”

  He noticed it then, smoke and flames shooting from behind Josie’s house. It looked to him like they might be burning trash, but when he turned back to Marna, he knew she was seeing something much more sinister. “It’s okay,” he told her, reaching over and putting his arm around her. “They’re just burning some trash.”

  She couldn’t stop trembling. All she could see in her mind’s eye were the terrible roaring flames engulfing her home that night. She could smell the smoke in her nostrils and it was suddenly smothering her. She started choking.

  Devon tightened his hold on her, never losing his calm. “It’s okay. Take a deep breath. It’s okay, honey. There’s nothing to be afraid of. Yes, another deep breath. They’re only burning trash.”

  She sat very still, listening to his soothing words, and soon found herself starting to calm down. When her trembling completely stopped, she became embarrassed. “Devon, I’m sorry….”

  “Shh! It’s okay.”

  It was then she realized how close they were sitting and how tightly his arm was holding her. She looked at him and their eyes met.

  “Oh, Marna…..” he said wistfully.

  She waited, her heart speeding up all over again, but for a completely different reason.

  His other arm went around her then, just before he leaned closer and kissed her. It was merely a soft, gentle touch of his lips against hers, but to her it was a taste of heaven. She longed for more, but he simply pulled her head against his shoulder and kept holding her. Not saying another word, they sat like that for a long time.

  But not long enough. She never wanted him to let go.

  ∞ TWENTY-THREE ∞

  HE CALLED her honey. Lying in her bed much later, Marna remembered his words and smiled. Then he’d kissed her. The very thought made her tremble all over again, from the top of her head to the tips of her toes – and every place in between. She laughed aloud, thinking she was as giddy as a school girl on her first date. She’d been kissed before. She’d been held before. Just the same, she couldn’t remember ever feeling the way she did right then. Not even with Shaun, when she was eighteen and certain she was in love with him.

  Sometime following the kiss and the time she entered her home later, she’d gone with Devon to give Josie her flowers and Suzi the candy. She’d met Josie’s husband Ted and listened to the little girl’s happy chattering, but all she could think of the entire time was how it had felt being in Devon’s arms and having his lips on hers. When she’d finally gone to bed, every time she closed her eyes, she once again saw his face so close to hers. She heard his soothing voice and felt his arms tightening around her. She again felt the brush of his lips across hers.

  He’d called her honey. She finally fell asleep with those words still floating through her mind and a smile on her lips.

  DEVON was all smiles at the breakfast table. Across from him, his grandfather watched him until he could no longer stay silent.

  “So, is that coffee you’re drinking or tickle juice?” he finally asked.

  Devon was glad his mother was still in bed asleep. He wanted to confide in Conrad, but wasn’t ready to share his feelings with Reeka. “I love her, Pops.”

  Conrad’s grin widened, but his eyes were serious. “You’re talking about Marna.”

  Devon nodded. “We had so much fun yesterday. It didn’t end after we dropped you and Mom off. It just got better and better. Pops, we talked about everything under the sun. She’s the best conversationalist. She doesn’t only talk, she listens. And her laugh! Oh, I could listen to it forever and not get tired of it.”

  “So you like to talk to her and laugh with her. Son, I am not going to say my next words to be mean, but they must be said. Do you like to look at her?”

  “I love to look at her. She’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

  Conrad laughed loudly. “Yep, I think you’re in love, and I couldn’t be happier.”

  A sleepy voice came from the kitchen doorway. “What couldn’t you be happier about, Conrad? Maybe the fact that I’m leaving soon?” Reeka chuckled, walked across the room to the coffee pot and poured herself a cup. She couldn’t help noticing how quiet everything suddenly became and how it stayed that way as she seated herself beside her son at the table. She grinned. “I must have hit the nail on the head, huh? Have I been that big of a pain that you really are glad I’m leaving soon?”

  “We weren’t talking about you, Mom,” Devon said, smiling at her. “Me and Pops both love having you here.” He paused a moment and sipped his coffee. “I guess I may as well tell you what we were talking about because it isn’t going to be a secret for long. I plan to let the whole world know. I’m in love. For the first time since I was sixteen years old, I am really and truly in love.”

  She swallowed. “With Marna?” He’d spent the entire day yesterday with her. Who else could it be?

  “With Marna.”

  “And I think it’s wonderful,” Conrad said.

  Reeka said nothing. For what seemed forever, she just sat there in total silence, rolling her hands around on her cup. Finally, she stood up again. “I need to go get dressed. We’ll – talk about this later.”

  “She’s not happy about this at all,” Devon said the minute she was out of sight. “I didn’t figure she would be. She’s never been able to hide her feelings, and I never had any good vibes when she was with Marna.”

  “Don’t let her opinion, or anyone else’s, bother you, Devon. Your own heart is all you have to listen to. God didn’t put love in there with the intention of letting it be crushed because of what somebody else thinks or says.”

  Devon grinned. “I know I said it before, but I’ll say it again. You’re just about the smartest man I’ve ever known, other than my father.”

  “Well, he got it from me!” Conrad laughed. “And I’m starting to believe it was passed on to you, too.”

  REEKA was trembling when she reached her room. She couldn’t let it happen, she thought as she sank down onto the bed. Devon was her only son. It would destroy him if he married someone that looked like Marna. He couldn’t truly be in love with her. It was only infatuation. Once he realized how embarrassing it would be having her as a life mate, he’d change his mind.

  It surprised her when a surge of guilt ran through her. Except for those hideous scars and that one bad eye, Marna was a lovely person. She seemed happy, despite her looks, and Reeka had to admit she’d enjoyed being with her the day before. There had even been times when she hadn’t noticed her looking any different than anyone else.

  But she did.

  Her inner conscience began a much unwanted conversation with her mind.

  Does that mean she doesn’t deserve to have someone love her, because she looks different?

  Of course not. She’ll find somebody someday.

  But not Devon?

  Devon’s not only my son but he’s the best looking young man I’ve ever seen. He looks just like his father, like his grandfather used to look. It wouldn’t be fair to saddle him with anyone that wasn’t equally beautiful.

  So looks are all that matters?

  Not all, but a big part of it. They probably have nothing else in common either.

  So you think he’d be unequally yoked if he married Marna?

  Yes, I do.

  Unequally yoked is when two minds differ, not two faces. It’s when two voices can never agree. Most important of all, it’s when a believer chooses to be with a non-believer, and both Devon and Marna are true believers.

  It would never work. He’ll wind up breaking her
heart and she’ll break his at the same time.

  You know this for a fact?

  How can I not know it? Look at him. Look at her.

  And what do you see? Their faces or their hearts? Do you see what they see when they look at each other, or only what you see when you look at her?

  She sighed, completely frustrated. “This argument is going nowhere,” she said very softly, “and I refuse to let it continue. And I refuse to let my son ruin his life because he’s naïve enough to think he’s in love with her. He still doesn’t know what love is, even after all these years. And I’m going to prove it!”

  ∞ TWENTY-FOUR ∞

  MARNA COULDN’T believe it when Devon called her every morning that week. He was just checking in, he told her, to make sure she had a restful night and see what she had planned for the day. After they talked for a while, he hung up and she dove into helping Taryn work up whatever new orders had come in.

  “I can’t believe you,” Taryn commented on Friday morning. “All week long, you’ve been walking on a cloud. I’ve never seen you laughing so much or being so happy since before…….for a long time. Sharris even commented on it the other day. So, do you want to share?”

  Marna grinned. “I can’t. Not yet. Just be happy for me, will you, without having to know why?”

  Taryn laughed. “It isn’t hard to guess, you know, that it has something to do with Devon.”

  Marna’s phone interrupted the conversation and she looked at the caller ID, then smiled. Devon. The second time that day.

  “Do you like to roller skate?” he wanted to know.

  “I haven’t done it for a while, but I used to be pretty good at it.”

  “It’s like riding a bike. You never forget how to do it.”

  Memory of the fun they’d had that day with Suzi on the bicycles jumped into her mind. “We need to do that again. I haven’t seen Suzi all week. Guess she’s enjoying all the time she can with her dad.”

  “It’s hard when a man has to leave his family to be able to support them. I just thought of something. Ted mentioned he dabbles with computers a little. I wonder if he’d be interested in taking some training and joining me one of these days.”

  Her eyes brightened. “That’s a wonderful idea. You could mention it to him and see.”

  “I will, but right now, I want to see if you’d like to go skating this evening. I’ve just got a hankering to get rolling to all those bright lights and loud music once again. You don’t think we’re too old, do you?”

  “Never!”

  “Good, how about if I pick you up at five and we have a bite to eat and then we’ll head into Georgia. That’s the closest place I know of that has a rink.”

  “That sounds wonderful. You know, I could fix some sandwiches and we could eat here. That’ll give us more time.”

  More time. Exactly what he wanted. He grinned. More time with her.

  Taryn had been listening to the entire conversation. "I think I know now,” she said, grinning from ear to ear when Marna disconnected the call.

  “I’m afraid to be too happy and excited,” Marna told her, “but I’m not going to let my fears ruin one bit of the time we might have together.”

  “He likes you. Don’t be afraid to believe it.”

  “I’m usually not – but then I look in the mirror.” Marna sighed. “I’m not looking today.”

  When Devon arrived later, they’d no sooner sat down to eat when the doorbell rang.

  Sharris jumped up. “I’ve got it.” Going to the door, she opened it quickly, expecting to see the man she was dating that evening. Instead, there stood Suzi, rubbing tear-filled eyes.

  Even though Sharris hadn’t actually met the little girl, she was well aware of who she was. She knelt down beside her. “Suzi, I’m Marna and Taryn’s sister Sharris. Are you okay?”

  “My daddy just left. He had to go back to work.”

  “Come on in the kitchen, honey. We’ll talk about it. Marna and Devon, Taryn and I are eating some sandwiches. Are you hungry?”

  “You sure are pretty, Sharris. I’ll bet Marna was beautiful just like you before she got her face burned. But I still think she’s the most beautiful person I know. Something just – shines through those scars and makes her that way. Doesn’t it?”

  What could she say? How could such words of wisdom come from the mouth of such a small child? “Yes, it does.” Sharris straightened up again. “Come on. Let’s go into the kitchen.”

  “I saw Devon’s truck. I’m glad he’s here.” Suzi followed her. “I really like Devon. Next to my daddy, he’s the best man I ever met.”

  “Suzi!” Marna smiled when she saw the little girl, but her expression quickly sobered when she noticed her tears. “Come over here, honey, and tell me what’s wrong.” She patted the empty chair beside her and Suzi sat down in it, telling her the same thing she’d told Sharris, that her daddy had left and she was sad about it.

  As Suzi was talking, her eyes moved from Marna to Taryn and then to Sharris and back again to Marna. Finally, she spoke wistfully. “You are all so lucky. I wish I had some sisters. Then I wouldn’t be so lonely when Daddy leaves.”

  Taryn grinned. “Maybe we could be your adopted sisters. Marna likes you a lot and I know you like her. Maybe you can like Sharris and me, too.”

  Suzi smiled for the first time since she arrived. “Could I do that, be your adopted sister?” Her eyes moved from Taryn, to Marna and then to Sharris.

  “Let’s have a vote,” Marna said. “I vote yes.”

  “Me, too,” said Taryn and Sharris in unison.

  Devon laughed. “So I guess that’s final, but it sure makes me feel left out. Maybe I could be your adopted big brother.”

  Suzi’s eyes brightened, enlightening her entire face. “Yes!”

  “And you know one thing that big brothers do for their little sisters?”

  “Besides riding bikes?”

  “Besides riding bikes.”

  She waited, her eyes wide and eager.

  “They take them skating.”

  As the words left Devon’s lips, Marna could feel the eyes of both her sisters on her. She could almost read their minds. Sharris was thinking, ‘Poor Marna. Another date with a kid along’, while Taryn was laughing inside and thinking what a great guy Devon was. Marna couldn’t help but chuckle.

  “Skating? I’ve never been skating. I don’t know how to skate.”

  “You’re exactly the right age to learn,” Marna said. “I was about nine or ten when I went the first time.”

  “So, when are we going?”

  “As soon as we’re done eating,” Devon replied. “We’ll go check with your mama to be sure it’s okay, and if she says it is, we’ll be off.”

  Suzi looked at the others. “Are you going, too, Sharris and Taryn?”

  “I already have other plans,” Sharris responded.

  “I’m afraid I do, too,” Taryn added, even though the truth was she had nothing in the world planned for the evening. Skating had never been the most fun thing to do for her.

  “Oh, gee! Oh, gosh! Devon, you and Marna are the most fun people in the world to be with! Are you going to get married? If you do, can I be the little girl that walks in the wedding and scatters flowers?”

  Silence. Sharris looked at Marna and snickered. Taryn shrugged her shoulders, trying to keep a straight face. Devon looked at Marna and winked, then turned back to Suzi. “I promise that we’ll think about it. Now….let’s eat so we can get going!”

  Marna’s heart was racing a mile a minute. He might have said anything but that. She heard the words again in her mind. ‘I promise that we’ll think about it’. Was there a meaning behind that ‘promise’ or was it simply the first thing he thought of as a way to respond to Suzi’s question? That was it. It had to be. Just the same, she found it necessary to take in a deep breath. She was afraid if she didn’t she’d smother because of all the joy that was suddenly flooding her entire body.

  ∞ TW
ENTY-FIVE ∞

  REEKA WAS NERVOUS. Was she doing the right thing? As she fiddled with her hair and checked and rechecked her makeup and clothes, she told herself it was too late to be having second thoughts. Everything had come together much better and quicker than she could have expected. Wasn’t that a sign that it was meant to be?

  She looked at her watch. Two hours to go. It would take thirty minutes to get to the little out of the way restaurant in Georgia where she’d set up the meeting. What could she do in the meantime? She didn’t want to have Sunday morning breakfast with Conrad and Devon, because she feared her nervousness would show through, no matter how she tried to keep it hidden. Besides, they’d be trying to persuade her to go to church again. She should have set everything up for another day, but it hadn’t worked out that way. This was the only time she could do it.

  She jumped when a light knock sounded on her bedroom door.

  “Are you coming to breakfast, Mom?” Devon opened the door and looked in at his mother, smiling. “Wow, you sure look nice! Everyone in church will notice you this morning.”

  “I’m not going to church. I have an appointment with an old friend.”

  “Anyone I know?”

  She couldn’t answer his question truthfully, but hated to tell a flat out lie. “Just an old friend. This is the only time we could get together.” Looking at him, she forced the biggest, brightest smile she could muster. “Speaking of someone looking nice, you clean up pretty good yourself.” Pretty good couldn’t come close to describing how handsome he was. The sight of him made her all the surer that what she was doing was the right thing.

  He laughed. “Yea, okay. I’ll probably be gone all day. Pops and me are having lunch after church with Marna, Josie and Suzi.” He’d told his mother all about Suzi and her family.

  “You and Marna don’t spend much time alone, do you?” She hoped the relief didn’t come through her voice as she spoke. With her next thought, her elatedness quickly diminished. “But, then again, you were with her just last night.”