A Mother's Wish

by Debbie Macomber

  “And pigs have wings,” Angela said with more than a trace of sarcasm. She stood up and walked around to the front of her desk, leaning against one corner while she folded her arms and stared unblinkingly at Robin.

  Robin knew it would do little good to try to disguise her feelings. She’d had a restless night and was convinced it showed. No doubt her eyes were glazed; they ached. Her bones ached. But mostly her heart ached. Arranging a date with Angela’s cousin was a sure indication of her distress.

  “The last thing I heard, Cole was supposed to attend Jeff’s baseball game with you.”

  “He did.” Robin walked to her own desk and reached for the cup of coffee she’d brought upstairs with her. Peeling off the plastic lid, she cautiously took a sip.

  “And?”

  “Jeff pitched and he played a fabulous game,” Robin said, hoping her friend wouldn’t question her further.

  Angela continued to stare at Robin. Good grief, Robin thought, the woman had eyes that could cut through solid rock.

  “What?” Robin snapped when she couldn’t stand her friend’s scrutiny any longer. She took another sip of her coffee and nearly scalded her lips. If the rest of her day followed the pattern set that morning, she might as well go home now. The temptation to climb back into bed and hide her head under the pillow was growing stronger every minute.

  “Tell me what happened with Cole,” Angela said again.

  “Nothing. I already told you he was at Jeff’s baseball game. What more do you want?”

  “The least you can do is tell me what went on last night,” Angela said slowly, carefully enunciating each word as though speaking to someone who was hard of hearing.

  “Before or after Jeff’s game?” Robin pulled out her chair and sat down.

  “Both.”

  Robin gave up. Gesturing weakly with her hands, she shrugged, took a deep breath and poured out the whole story in one huge rush. “Cole was held up at the office in a meeting, so we didn’t meet at the house the way we’d planned. Naturally Jeff was disappointed, but we decided that whatever was keeping Cole wasn’t his fault, and we left for Balboa Park without him. Cole arrived at the bottom of the second inning, just as Jeff was ready to pitch. Jeff only allowed three hits the entire game, and scored two home runs himself. Afterward Cole took us all out for Chinese food at a fabulous restaurant I’ve never heard of but one you and I will have to try sometime. Our next raise, okay? Later Cole phoned and asked to take Jeff and me on a picnic Saturday. I think we’re going to Golden Gate Park because he also talked about flying kites.” She paused, dragged in a fresh gulp of air and gave Angela a look that said “make something out of that if you can!”

  “I see,” Angela said after a lengthy pause.

  “Good.”

  Robin wasn’t up to explaining things, so if Angela really didn’t understand, that was just too bad. She only knew that she was dangerously close to letting her emotions take charge of her life. She was becoming increasingly attracted to a man who could well be trying to replace the son he’d lost. Robin needed to find a way to keep from following her heart, which was moving at breakneck speed straight into Cole’s arms.

  “Will you introduce me to Frank or not?” she asked a second time, strengthening her voice and her conviction.

  Angela was still watching her with those diamond-cutting eyes. “I’m not sure yet.”

  “You’re not sure!” Robin echoed, dismayed. “For weeks you’ve been spouting his virtues. According to you, this cousin is as close to a god as a human being can get. He works hard, buys municipal bonds, goes to church regularly and flosses his teeth.”

  “I said all that?”

  “Just about,” Robin muttered. “I made up the part about flossing his teeth. Yet when I ask to meet this paragon of limitless virtue, you say you’re not sure you want to introduce me. I would’ve thought you’d be pleased.”

  “I am pleased,” Angela said, frowning, “but I’m also concerned.”

  “It’s not your job to be concerned. All you have to do is call Fred and let him know I’m available Saturday evening for drinks or dinner or a movie or whatever. I’ll let him decide what he’s most comfortable with.”

  “It’s Frank, and I thought you said you were going on a picnic with Cole on Saturday.”

  Robin turned on her computer, prepared to check several columns of figures. If she looked busy and suitably nonchalant, it might prompt Angela to agree. “Jeff and I will be with Cole earlier in the day. I’ll simply make sure we’re back before late afternoon, so there’s no reason to worry.”

  Robin’s forehead puckered. “I am worried. I can’t help being worried. Honestly, Robin, I’ve never seen you like this. You’re so … so determined.”

  “I’ve always been determined,” Robin countered, glancing up from the computer.

  “Oh, I agree one hundred percent,” Angela said with a heavy sigh, “but not when it comes to anything that has to do with men. My thirteen-year-old niece has more savvy with the opposite sex than you do!”

  “Mom, look how high my kite is,” Jeff hollered as his box kite soared toward the heavens.

  “It’s touching the sky!” Robin shouted, and laughed with her son as he tugged and twisted the string. Despite all her misgivings about her relationship with Cole, she was thoroughly enjoying the afternoon. At first, she’d been positive the day would turn into a disaster. She was sure Cole would take one look at her and know she was going out with another man that evening. She was equally sure she’d blurt it out if he didn’t immediately guess.

  Cole had been as excited as Jeff about the picnic and kite-flying expedition. The two of them had been fussing with the kites for hours—buying, building and now flying them. For her part, Robin was content to soak up the sunshine.

  The weather couldn’t have been more cooperative. The sky was a brilliant blue and the wind was perfect. Sailboats scudding on the choppy green waters added dashes of bright color.

  In contrast to all the beauty surrounding her, Robin’s heart was troubled. Watching Cole, so patient and gentle with her son, filled her with contradictory emotions. Part of her wanted to thank him. Thank him for the smile that lit up Jeff’s face. Thank him for throwing open the shades and easing her toward the light. And part of her wanted to shut her eyes and run for cover.

  “Mom, look!” Jeff cried as the kite whipped and kicked in the wind. Blackie raced at his side as the sleek red-and-blue kite sliced through the sky, then dipped sharply and crashed toward the ground at heart-stopping speed, only to be caught at the last second and lifted higher and higher.

  “I’m looking, I’m looking!” Robin shouted back. She’d never seen Jeff happier. Pride and joy shone from his face, and Robin was moved almost to tears.

  Cole stood behind Jeff, watching the kite. One hand rested on the boy’s shoulder, the other shaded his eyes as he gazed up at the sky. They laughed, and once more Robin was struck by the mingling of their voices. One mature and measured, the other young and excited. Both happy.

  A few minutes later, Cole jogged over to Robin’s blanket and sat down beside her. He did nothing more than smile at her, but she felt an actual jolt.

  Cole stretched out and leaned back on his elbows, grinning at the sun. “I can’t remember the last time I laughed so much.”

  “You two seem to be enjoying this,” Robin said.

  If Cole noticed anything awry, he didn’t comment. She’d managed not to tell him about the date with Angela’s cousin; she certainly didn’t want him to think she was trying to make him jealous. That wasn’t the evening’s purpose at all. Actually she wasn’t sure what she hoped to accomplish by dating Fred … Frank. She mentally shouted the name five times. Why did she keep calling him Fred? She didn’t know that any more than she knew why she was going out with him. On the morning she’d talked Angela into making the arrangements for her, it had seemed a matter of life and death. Now she only felt confused and regretful.

  “Jeff says you’v
e got a date this evening.”

  So much for her worry that she might blurt it out herself, Robin thought. She glanced at Cole. He might’ve been referring to the weather for all the emotion revealed in his voice.

  “A cousin of a good friend. She’s been after me for months to meet Frank—we’re having dinner.”

  “Could this be the Frank you weren’t going out with and that was final?”

  Robin stared at him blankly.

  “You answered the phone with that when I called to inquire about Blackie. Remember?”

  “Oh, yes …” Suddenly she felt an intense need to justify her actions. “It’s just that Angela’s been talking about him for so long and it seemed like the right thing to do. He’s apparently very nice and Angela’s been telling me he’s a lot of fun and I didn’t think it would hurt to meet him ….” Once she got started, Robin couldn’t seem to stop explaining.

  “Robin,” Cole said, his eyes tender. “You don’t owe me any explanations.”

  She instantly grew silent. He was right, she knew that, yet she couldn’t help feeling guilty. She was making a terrible mess of this.

  “I’m not the jealous type,” Cole informed her matter-of-factly.

  “I’m not trying to make you jealous,” she returned stiffly.

  “Good,” Cole said and shrugged. His gaze moved from her to Jeff, who was jogging across the grass. Blackie was beside him, barking excitedly.

  He hadn’t asked, but she felt obliged to explain who’d be looking after her son while she was out. “Jeff’s going to the movies with Heather and Kelly Lawrence while I’m out.”

  Cole didn’t say anything. All he did was smile. It was the same smile he’d flashed at her earlier. The same devastating, wickedly charming smile.

  He seemed to be telling her she could dine with a thousand different men and it wouldn’t disturb him in the least. As he’d said, he wasn’t the jealous type. Great. This was exactly the way she’d wanted him to respond, wasn’t it? She could date a thousand different men, because Cole didn’t care about her. He cared about her son.

  “Let me know when you want to leave,” he said with infuriating self-assurance. “I wouldn’t want you to be late.”

  On that cue, Robin checked her watch and was surprised to note that it was well past four. They’d been having so much fun, the day had simply slipped away. When she looked up, she found Cole studying her expectantly. “It’s … I’m not meeting Frank until later,” she said, answering his unspoken question evasively while she gathered up the remains of their picnic.

  An hour later, they decided to leave Golden Gate Park. Jeff and Cole loaded up the kites, as well as the picnic cooler, in the back of Cole’s car. It took them another hour to get back to Glen Park because of the traffic, which made Robin’s schedule even tighter. But that was hardly Cole’s fault—it wasn’t as if he’d arranged for an accident on the freeway.

  Cole and Jeff chatted easily for most of the ride home. When they finally arrived at the house, both Robin and Jeff helped Cole unload the car. Blackie’s barking only added to the confusion.

  “I suppose I’d better get inside,” Robin said, her eyes briefly meeting Cole’s. She felt awkward all of a sudden, wishing Jeff was standing there as a barrier, instead of busily carrying things onto Cole’s porch.

  “We had a great time,” she added self-consciously. She couldn’t really blame her nervousness on Cole; he’d been the perfect companion all day. “Thank you for the picnic.”

  Jeff joined them, his eyes narrowing as he looked at Cole. “Are you gonna let her do it?”

  “Do what?” Robin asked.

  “Go out with that other man,” Jeff said righteously, inviting Cole to leap into the argument. “I can’t believe you’re letting her get away with this.”

  “Jeff. This isn’t something we should be discussing with Mr. Camden.”

  “All right,” he murmured with a sigh. “But I think you’re making a mistake.” He cast a speculative glance in Cole’s direction. “Both of you,” he mumbled under his breath and headed for the house.

  “Thanks for the wonderful afternoon, Cole,” Robin said again.

  “No problem,” he responded, hands in his pockets, his stance relaxed. “Have a good time with Frank.”

  “Thanks, I will,” she said, squinting at him suspiciously just before she turned toward the house. Darn it, she actually felt guilty! There wasn’t a single solitary reason she should feel guilty for agreeing to this dinner date with Angela’s cousin, yet she did. Cole must’ve known it, too, otherwise he wouldn’t have made that remark about having a good time. Oh, he knew all right.

  As Robin was running the bath, Jeff raced up the stairs. “Mom, I need money for the movie.” He thrust her purse into her hands. “How much are you giving me for goodies?”

  “Goodies?”

  “You know, popcorn, pop, a couple of candy bars. I’m starving.”

  “Jeff, you haven’t stopped eating all day. What about the two hot dogs I just fixed you?”

  “I ate them, but that was fifteen minutes ago. I’m hungry again.”

  Robin handed him fifteen dollars, prepared for an argument. That amount should be enough to pay his way into the movie and supply him with popcorn and a soda. Anything beyond that he could do without.

  Jeff took the money from her and slowly shook his head. “That’s it, kid,” she said in a firm voice.

  “Did I complain?” Bright blue eyes gazed innocently back at her.

  “You didn’t have to. I could see it in your face.”

  Jeff was ready to leave a few minutes later, just as Robin was getting dressed. He stood outside her bedroom door and shouted that Kelly and her mom were there to pick him up.

  “Have fun. I won’t be any later than ten-thirty,” she assured him.

  “Can’t I wait for you over at Cole’s after the movie?”

  “Absolutely not!” Robin’s heart skidded to a dead stop at the suggestion. The last person she wanted to face at the end of this evening was Cole Camden. “You didn’t ask him, did you?”

  “No … but I’m not all that excited about going to Kelly’s. I’m there every day, you know.”

  “Sweetie, I’m sorry. I promise I won’t be late.”

  “You’re sure I can’t go over to Cole’s?”

  “Jeffrey Leonard Masterson, don’t you dare bother Cole. Do you understand me?”

  He blinked. She rarely used that tone with him, but she didn’t have the time or energy to argue about this.

  “I guess,” he said with an exaggerated sigh. “But could you make it home by ten?”

  “Why ten?”

  “Because I don’t want to do anything stupid like fall asleep in front of Kelly,” he whispered heatedly.

  “I’ll be back as soon as I can,” Robin said.

  Glancing at her clock radio, she gasped at the time. She was running late. From the moment she’d made the arrangements to meet Frank, she hadn’t given the reality of this evening much thought. Just forcing herself to go through with it had depleted her of energy.

  Robin had always hated situations like this. Always. She was going to a strange restaurant, meeting a strange man, and for what? She didn’t know.

  Tucking her feet into her pumps, Robin hurried to the bathroom to spray on a little perfume. Not much, just enough to give herself some confidence. She rushed down the stairs and reached for her purse.

  Her hand was on the doorknob when the phone rang. For a moment, Robin intended to ignore it. It was probably for Jeff. But what if the call was from her parents? Or Frank—calling to cancel? Ridiculous though it was, each ring sounded more urgent than the last. She’d have to answer or she’d spend all evening wondering who it was. Muttering under her breath, she dashed into the kitchen.

  “Hello,” she said impatiently.

  At first there was no response. “Robin, it’s Cole.” He sounded nothing like himself. “I lied.” With that the line was abruptly disconnected.
>
  Robin held the receiver away from her ear and stared at it for several seconds. He’d lied? About what? Good heavens, why had he even phoned? To tell her he’d lied.

  There wasn’t time to phone him back and ask what he’d meant.

  “Would you care for something to drink?” Frank Eberle asked, glancing over the wine list.

  “Nothing, thanks,” Robin said. Frank had turned out to be a congenial sort, which was a pleasant surprise. He was quite attractive, with light blue eyes and a thick head of distinguished-looking salt-and-pepper hair. Angela had once mentioned he was “a little bit” shy, which had panicked Robin since she was a whole lot shy, at least around men. The way she’d figured it, they’d stare at each other most of the night, with no idea what to say. However, they did have Angela in common. Whereas with Cole, all she shared was—

  Her thoughts came to an abrupt halt. She refused to think about her neighbor or his last-minute phone call. She balked at the idea of dining with one man while wistfully longing for another—which was exactly what she was doing.

  Robin studied the menu, pretending to decide between the prime-rib special and the fresh halibut. But the entire time she stared at the menu, she was racking her brain for a topic of conversation.

  Frank saved her the trouble. “For once,” he said, “Angela didn’t exaggerate. You’re a delightful surprise.”

  “I am?” It was amusing to hear him echo her own reaction.

  Frank nodded, his smile reserved. “When Angie phoned earlier in the week, I wasn’t sure what to expect. She keeps wanting me to date her friends. And to hear her talk, she’s close friends with dozens of gorgeous women all interested in meeting me.”

  Robin grinned. “She should run a dating service. I can’t tell you the number of times she’s matched me up with someone, or tried to, anyway.”

  “But you’re a comfortable person to be around. I could sense that right away.”

  “Thank you. I … wasn’t sure what to expect, either. Angela’s raved about you for weeks, wanting to get the two of us together.” Robin glanced from the menu to her companion, then back again. She felt the same misgivings every time she agreed to one of these arranged dates.