Devil's Due: Satan's Devils MC Colorado Chapter #3

by Manda Mellett

  Her face falls. “I’d like nothing more than to make love with you again, problem is, I doubt I’d want to give you up if we did. I know you don’t want a woman, and I said I didn’t want a man…” The way she says it gives me hope she’s changed her mind. But then she adds, firmly, “Whatever either of us want, there’s no point starting anything between us. Lennox will sort out somewhere for me to go, and I’ll start all over again. I may never see you again, Beef.” Her voice catches.

  I squat in front of her, taking both her hands in mine. “I’m not letting Lennox get in between us. Leave him out of it for now. Talk about us, Stevie. We make a good team, don’t we? We’re compatible in bed and out. What would you say, if I said I wanted to explore what we have between us? Take the next step?”

  “You’re suggesting a relationship?”

  I still can’t read what she thinks,. so I make sure there’s no misunderstanding on my part. “That’s what I want.”

  One of her hands leaves mine, and reaches up to touch my face, gently tracing the contours. “You’re frowning.”

  “I’m holding my breath waiting for you to say yes.”

  The movement of her finger changes, now she’s stroking simply to give me comfort. I lean into her touch. “I’d have been in your bed every night if it was that simple, Beef. I’d have ignored all the valid reasons you said for us keeping our distance and tried my hardest so you weren’t able to resist me. But you were right then, and wrong now.”

  I believe it’s the other way around, but I’ll hear her out, then tell her why she’s moving in the wrong direction. “Why, Stevie?”

  “Because what I’ve got to do and your life don’t mix. I need to present my evidence and get the bad guys the punishment they deserve. You live and breathe the club.”

  “Does it worry you, me being a biker?”

  “No. Your club is very different to theirs. You wear leather and ride a bike. Hell, even I know there are as many different types of clubs as makes of motorcycles, probably more. I was reading about one the other day for members of law enforcement, firefighters and the like. The Warped Jokers are a long way distant from you. If I hadn’t been convinced of it before, I learned a lot from listening to the old ladies.”

  She seems to have learned a lot in a short space of time. “You were asking questions?”

  “No, not me. Melissa. I gather she and Skull are quite new, and she was trying to learn what it was going to be like to be an old lady.”

  “Yeah, he’s only recently claimed her. Any old lady needs to be able to handle the club.”

  She giggles softly. “I may have learned the term, club business.”

  “Yeah? Would you be alright with that?”

  “Beef,” she sighs. “We deviated from our conversation. I’m okay with club business as it will never be mine. I’m moving on as soon as Lennox can arrange it.”

  “Babe,” I start, knowing I’ve got to spell out some facts of life. “It’s not safe for Lennox to set you up somewhere else. You’ve been found once, maybe you’ll be traced again. Here you’ve got me, and my brothers, to protect you.”

  “They found me because of Max’s tracker,” she says quickly and adamantly. “He’s not wearing that now.”

  “Stevie,” I say her name in exasperation. “What you’re missing out is someone knew he had a tracker and could get into the database to trace it. It wasn’t some random person, they were trying to find you. Somewhere, somehow, someone’s resourceful as well as dirty. Maybe Lennox himself. Until we know who and why, there’s always a risk that they’ll just use another way to find you. If you’re intent on testifying, you won’t be any use if you’re dead.”

  She stands, her body poised as if she’s about to pace, when her brain kicks into gear reminding her she doesn’t yet know the lay out of the room. I move myself, quickly lifting my duffle I’d left lying on the floor and kicking my boots under the bed. But she sits back down and bangs the cover with both hands in frustration.

  “I have to testify, Beef.”

  “Do you?” I suddenly challenge. “Is putting the Warped Jokers away, destroying their club, worth your life?”

  “You don’t understand.” Her voice has grown louder. “It’s all I can do. I was the only one they left alive. Everyone else was killed because they’d seen their faces. I shouldn’t be here now. If it wasn’t for the fact I was blind, I’d already be dead. I have to do something. I have to. If that means taking a risk, trusting the people who should know best because we’ve both got the same end in mind—me turning up in court—then that’s what I’ll do.”

  Suddenly words are circling around my head. Survivor’s guilt. “Oh, babe.” I can’t keep my hands off her. I pull her into me, holding her close as she begins to sob. I’ve spoken about it, know about it, damn, even diagnosed I suffer from it myself, but hadn’t deep down appreciated why she’d given up so much. She thinks she doesn’t deserve to be here. As her tears dampen my shirt, I try to think what I can say.

  “Stevie, listen to me. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to live. You know what happened to me? I was as close to death as anyone could be. Hell, all my brothers had said their final goodbyes. Fuck knows how or why, but I woke up. I’ve been given another chance. Three times they’ve tried to kill you, and three times they’ve failed. You stop and think for a moment. Maybe there’s a reason for that. Maybe you are meant to testify, but your life doesn’t end after that. You deserve to be happy.”

  “I’m glad you didn’t die, Beef.”

  “Me too, babe, me too. But it has made me think about things differently. Maybe at first I made a mistake, grabbing my chance of happiness because, hey, I’d had a reminder life can be short. That’s why I leapt for the first woman that crossed my path. Now I think maybe I was pushed your way, to help you and save you.”

  “I don’t need saving…”

  “Yes you do.” I hug her again. “From those thoughts in your head if not from anything else. It’s a fuck of a thing you’re dealing with. That those bastards left you alive as a joke, because they thought your lack of sight made you useless. To my mind, your blindness saved you, just like something saved me. Miracles, both of us.”

  “Another thing in common but doesn’t mean we should be together.” She inhales deeply. “Am I not just another Sally? Someone you think you were saved to look after? I don’t need you, Beef.”

  “I know you don’t need me, and that’s why you’re nothing like Sally.” I let go of her, and put my head in my hands, wondering how I can explain it. “I can investigate Lennox, and if he comes up clean, let him take you somewhere no one can find you.” And threaten him with death if a hair of her head gets harmed. “That would be me doing my job and looking out for you. Max will soon be able to work again, I know you’ll find your way in a new town with him by your side. You don’t need me. But I need you.”

  “Beef.” Her small arm hugs as much of me as she can.

  “Listen. My sensible head tells me that’s what I should do, but inside I can’t let you go. How could I rest or settle, knowing you were out there, somewhere, and I could never see you? Never speak to you? Never watch you burn bacon…”

  I duck her hand, then grab hold of it.

  “I couldn’t Stevie. I can’t let you go. I didn’t need Sally. Didn’t need her to be in the room to be able to breathe.”

  “That’s how you feel about me?” her voice sounds small.

  “Yeah. Look. We can do this your way. You think the marshals are best placed to look after you. If that’s the case, I’ll come with you, Stevie. You’ll never be alone again. If you can put up with my ugly mug in your life, I’ll be by your side forever.”

  She’s quiet. She looks stunned. “I don’t know what to say, Beef. I know how this works, you don’t. I’ll be given a new name, a new identity…”

  “I’ll have one too.”

  “You’d have to leave your club…”

  “I’ll leave it.”

  �
�No.” Pulling sharply away, she stands again. “I can’t ask you to do that. You have no idea how hard it is to leave behind everything you’ve ever known.”

  “But I’ve got a fuckin’ good imagination, babe. Yeah, the hardest thing in the world. You did it because you wanted justice for those people you were with at the end of their lives. Don’t you think I’ve got just as strong a reason for changing my life too?”

  “Why Beef? Why would you even consider doing something so drastic?”

  I stand. My hands move to her biceps, and I grip, lightly. “Because I can’t stand to see you walk out of my life. Love my brothers, course I do. But I could also so easily love you, if you let me.”

  “You don’t know me.”

  “What don’t I know about you? I know you’re loyal. I know you’re brave. I know you love fiercely. I know the type of films you enjoy and those you don’t, I know which foods you prefer. I know you’re hardworking—”

  “Beef,” she stops me. “I’m blind.”

  “So what? If you need me to do something, I’ll do it. Whether you can see or not.”

  I’ve stumped her. But I should have known she’s got more.

  “I won’t have children.”

  “Stevie…”

  “No, listen Beef. My blindness is hereditary. There’s a fifty percent chance of passing it on. And any child who inherited it could go deaf as well.”

  I can’t argue with that, can’t offer platitudes. Can’t say it’s a risk worth taking. She’s clearly thought a lot about this, and the one who’s lived losing her sight. I don’t know how I’d feel about bringing a child into the world knowing there was a good chance they’d go blind and could lose their hearing too. Any life, as Stevie herself proves, is worth living. But she knows how hard it is, I don’t.

  “Stevie, babe, I want you. I want what we could have together. If there are some things we can’t have, we’ll deal.” At that moment there’s a timely thump thump on the floor as Max wags his tail. It makes me grin. “We’ve already got someone to care for, Max.”

  She chuckles as I meant her to.

  “He needs to go outside.”

  “I’ll take him.”

  “Beef, I don’t need you…”

  “I know you don’t need me to do shit for you. But you haven’t learned this place yet, you don’t have a stick, and Max can’t be in a harness right now. It’s easier for me to do it.”

  “Easier, yes. But I don’t want to have to lean on you, Beef.”

  I lean in, my words vibrating against her ear. “I know you don’t. But if we’re going to be together, we’ll be a partnership, babe. You don’t have to do everything yourself, and not doing it, doesn’t mean you’re not capable.”

  There’s a small whine about my knee level. “Come on, Max. Let’s go get your business done.”

  “I can’t give you an answer, Beef. I don’t know what the best thing to do is. I need to know it’s right, for me and for you. If I take you away from everything you love, you could come to hate me one day.”

  I pause at the door and straighten. “Can’t see that happening, and if it did? Nothing to stop me coming back. You’re not trapping me babe. Think about it, okay?”

  At her ‘yes’, I open the door, then close it. Max tugs at his leash, but I stand still for a moment. What else can I say to persuade her I’m sincere? It hadn’t helped she’d seen the way I treated Sally, but the two women are poles apart. I tried, but I never had one tenth of the emotion for the other woman that I already feel for Stevie, and I’m convinced it will only keep growing.

  Another tug from the leash. Yeah, Max, I’m coming.

  Each day that damn dog seems to move easier. Wish humans healed as fast as animals seem to. Mind you, when we’re told to take it easy, we’re frightened to push ourselves. A dog just does what it can and doesn’t hold back even if its human owners think it’s too much. He’s steady going down the stairs though I watch him like a hawk.

  It’s not the first time I’ve had to clean up dog poo, so I’ve already got used to carrying a spare bag in my cut. Lizard though barks with laughter. He’s sitting outside having a smoke when I bend down, scooping up the mess and tying the bag.

  “Least Bitch buries her shit,” he calls out.

  I walk to the trash can and place the bag inside. Max, knowing he’s off duty for now, seems interested in the new smells around him. While he sniffs around, I wander over to Lizard.

  “You seem in deep with the woman.”

  I look at him sharply, seems he sees more than others do. I could tell him he’s wrong, but how can I when he’s so right. Deciding to be honest, I tell him, “She’s one hell of a woman, Liz. She gets me in here,” I thump my fist over my heart, “man. The thought of losing her now I’ve found her? Can’t bear to fuckin’ think of that.”

  “Would you leave with her?”

  Might as well start laying some ground work. “I might.”

  He shakes his head. “Most won’t understand. But sometimes… I get it, you know? We’ve got the whores here of course, but the thought of having that one woman...” Breaking off, he huffs a laugh. “Then I ‘spect I’d get bored pretty fast. Need some variety.”

  I’d been faithful to Sally even when she wasn’t giving me what I wanted. But Stevie? Might only have had her once, already know she will be all I need to keep me satisfied for the rest of my life.

  Max, either growing bored or anxious to be back with his mistress, comes over and sits by my feet. His tongue lolls out of the side of his mouth. Standing, I slap Liz on the back. “There’ll be a woman for you, one day. She’ll come along when you least expect it.”

  Chapter Thirty

  On my way back through the clubhouse I see Skull with his arm around Melissa. He’s tall and skinny, which gave rise to his handle of Runt which had been changed when he patched in. Her head reaches just to his shoulder. He’s got both arms around her and is resting his chin on the top of her head. Sparing a thought for another pair at the start of their relationship, I hope it works out. They look like a couple made for each other, the affection is shining out from them both. As long as Melissa can handle the life of an old lady in the MC, I reckon they’re a pair with a good chance of success.

  Me with Stevie? It’s not my life I’m asking her to accept, though I wish that it were. It’s me considering being the one making the changes.

  “Beef? Got a moment?”

  “Sure, Prez. Give me five? Just let me take Max back upstairs.”

  “Beef! Hold up. Stevie mentioned she needed this. Pal went and got it. Hope it’s right.”

  I swing around and then start beaming at what Jay’s holding out. A telescopic white stick, just like the kind Stevie had to abandon when we escaped her burning house.

  “She’ll be so grateful, Jay. Thank you.”

  She shrugs. Always noticed that about Jay. She’d help out with any of the kids, seeing what needed doing and doing it, but awkward when it comes to accepting thanks.

  I take the stick, and Max, back upstairs. Stevie’s sitting on the bed, her head in her hands. Max runs straight across to her and places his head in her lap. Idly she strokes him.

  “Jay got you this.” I place the stick in her hands.

  She smiles broadly and extends it. “It’s perfect. I feel so much better having this now.”

  “Demon wants a word with me. You going to be okay on your own?”

  Some of her tension disappears as my absence will give a reprieve on us continuing the difficult conversation we were having. “I’ll be fine. Just leave me to get acquainted with my new surroundings. With this,” she holds up the stick, “I’m confident enough to go down and find the others.”

  I’m not letting her off the hook entirely. Going across to her I lean over and cup my hand around the back of her head. Without warning I place the fingers of my other hand under her chin and raise her face up, then my lips come down. Taken unawares she opens her mouth, not wasting the opportunity I swe
ep my tongue inside.

  Christ, her taste. She’s so perfect. How could I have ever thought I could walk away? I was a damn fool.

  Her arms come up, but not to push me away. She holds me lightly to steady herself, then with a moan, she gives in, starting to kiss me back, her tongue mating with mine. It’s as though our mouths are using the words we can’t say out loud. Me telling her I never want to leave her side, her perhaps, even now, summoning up ways of telling me a final goodbye.

  Eventually, knowing I’m keeping the prez waiting, I reluctantly pull back.

  “Beef?” she begins, questioningly.

  “Just giving you something to think about,” I reply. “See you later, okay?”

  Leaving her looking stunned, I shut the door firmly enough so she knows I’ve gone, and go back down to see what Demon wants me for now. On the way down the stairs I adjust myself in my jeans, her taste having had the predictable effect. That part of my body I’ve decided to bring into play later in a further attempt to show her how well the two of us work. Yeah, I might have a few ideas in my head which means I’m still dealing with a rock-hard dick as I enter the office of my president.

  If Demon notices at least he’s gentleman enough to ignore it.

  “I’ve heard back from Drummer,” he starts, getting to the point immediately. “Things have been going on behind the scenes.”

  “And?” I prompt. My ass hitting the seat fast, leaning forward and giving all my attention to the man in front of me.

  “The issues are that no one wants the feds to drag an MC into court, nor have it disbanded under a RICO indictment.”

  My head starts to move back and forth, but before I can get a word out, he continues, “If the Warped Jokers had stuck to their normal trade, handled it under the radar, then they’d have had more support. But they got greedy, acted like fuckin’ criminals.”

  I think for a moment the ‘normal trade’ of drug, gun running, and trafficking women could also be considered a crime, but let that slip for now. Plenty of MCs earn their money that way, Satan’s Devils have got clear of it.