by Tania Crosse
But now, because of what Luke had just told her, all was in ruins.
She’d have to have it out with Jimmy. The shifts at the pub were all right, but she’d have to insist he gave up his work for Mr Jackson. So often it was two or three in the morning before he got in, and with his work at Price’s the next day, it just wasn’t worth taking the risk. And to be honest, Hillie would be relieved. Jimmy insisted it was all legitimate, but often he couldn’t – or wouldn’t – tell her exactly what it was he’d been doing. And when he did, she sometimes felt he was fobbing her off with some cock-and-bull story.
She’d thought marrying Jimmy would be the end of her problems, hadn’t she? She couldn’t have predicted what happened to her mum, of course, but in between the happy moments, her life sometimes seemed just as fraught, if not more so, than it had been before. Especially after what Luke had just told her. They simply couldn’t afford for Jimmy to lose his job at Price’s for the sake of the extra money he earned from this Jackson fellow!
She knocked on the front door to the Parkers’ house, hoping the happy welcome she knew she’d find there would make her feel better. And when Gert opened the door, beaming from ear to ear, she felt, as ever, as if she’d truly come home.
‘Come on in and have a cuppa,’ Gert invited her. ‘Only just got in from work, so I haven’t had time to change yet. And, Hillie, I’m ever so sorry, but I can’t come out with you tonight, after all. Rob sent us a message through Belinda. He’s got tickets for a West End show. Coming to pick us up in half an hour.’
‘Oh, how exciting!’ Hillie declared, trying to hide the fact that her heart had sunk. She’d wanted to talk to Gert in confidence about her misgivings over Jimmy’s outside activities, and now she wouldn’t get the chance. ‘What you going to see?’ she asked instead.
‘Dunno. It’s a surprise, he said. But I don’t care. Never been to a proper live show before.’
‘Me neither. But you make sure you remember every little detail to tell me tomorrow, Miss Parker!’
Gert’s glowing face had made Hillie get over her disappointment almost at once, and she was grinning as they went into the back room. The entire horde was there, the younger children racing in and out of the back door to the yard. Even Old Sal was sitting up quite alert for once.
‘Hello, everyone!’
‘Hello, Hillie, love,’ Eva beamed. ‘Tea in the pot if you want to help yourself.’
‘Thanks, I will. Oh, hello, Kit. How are you?’ she said as Kit came in from the backyard. ‘Haven’t seen you for ages.’
‘I’m very well, thanks. You look nice. New cardi?’
‘Yes, Jimmy got it for me,’ Hillie answered, blushing slightly, although not so much at Kit’s compliment as at the memory of the frustrating evening when Jimmy had produced the said item of clothing. ‘I wore it ’cos Gert and I were supposed to be going out, but now she’s going out with Rob. To a West End theatre, no less!’
‘So I’ve heard.’
‘Oh, I really am sorry to let you down, Hill—’
‘Now don’t you worry. Go upstairs and get yourself ready to paint the town red!’
‘I take it your Jimmy’s working?’ Kit put in. ‘Well, I’m at a loose end tonight. Fancy doing something?’
‘Oh.’ Hillie was taken by surprise. But as she thought about it, the idea of spending the evening with her old friend was really quite appealing. ‘What did you have in mind?’
‘Oh, I don’t know really. Anything on at the pictures you wanted to see?’
‘Not particularly. And it’s such a lovely evening, it seems a shame to spend it indoors, even if some of us are!’ Hillie teased, raising her eyebrows in Gert’s direction.
‘Oh, get away,’ Gert laughed back. ‘But I must go and titivate meself for me special night out!’ she went on with a mock expression of superiority as she disappeared out of the door and an instant later was heard clomping up the stairs.
‘Tell you what, then.’ Kit drew back Hillie’s attention. ‘We’ll have a walk in the park before it closes. I know you like that. Then we’ll cross over the bridge and head up the King’s Road. There’s bound to be a café or something open and we can get something to eat. If you’re sure Jimmy won’t mind, of course.’
The little catch in his voice didn’t register with Hillie and she smiled back. She almost wanted to say she wouldn’t care if Jimmy did mind, but instead she answered, ‘No, of course he wouldn’t.’
‘OK, then. You wait here and I’ll pop home to change out of my uniform. See you all later, then! Night-night, you little toe rags,’ he chuckled, scooping up Primrose and Trudy, one in each arm, to give them both a kiss. ‘I expect you two to be nicely tucked up in bed when I get back.’
He blew a raspberry onto each of their tummies before he set them on their feet again, making them giggle furiously and jump up for more.
‘Just one each, and then you get ready for bed,’ he laughed, readily obliging, his wide mouth spread in a handsome grin before he slipped out of the door.
‘How you getting on then, without poor Nell?’ Eva asked as she wiped the two little ones’ faces with a grubby-looking flannel.
‘Oh, OK, thanks, Mrs P,’ Hillie replied, her spirits a little dampened again at Eva’s question. ‘We all miss her terribly, of course. Frances and Daisy don’t ask about her quite so much, though. They don’t really understand, but I think they’re getting used to her not being there.’
‘Poor little mites,’ Eva tutted. ‘Stan, put these toads to bed, would you? And Jake and Mildred, you wash your faces and do your teeth ready for when it’s your bedtime, and all.’ And then, when Stan had taken the two youngest girls into the front room where they slept with Old Sal and Jake, Eva turned to Hillie, her face creased with compassion. ‘And how are you coping, Hillie, dear?’
Hillie blinked at her as her own emotions clambered over each other. But before she had a chance to reply, there was a brisk knock on the front door, followed by the thump of Gert flying down the stairs.
A proud smile spread across Eva’s lined face. ‘Never expected our Gert to find someone posh like this Rob. Lovely lad, he is. And right smitten.’
‘Gert’s got such a warm personality, Mrs P. That’s what he loves about her. It’s what love about her. What I love about you all.’
Unusually for Eva, the woman seemed to blush to the roots of her hair. ‘Oh, get away with you,’ she flustered.
‘No, it’s true,’ Hillie insisted, suddenly wanting to open up all her suppressed emotions. ‘You’re all so wonderful and kind. You. Stan. Gert, Kit. Even the little ones. I don’t know how I’d have got through all this without you all.’
‘It’s what friends are for,’ Eva nodded modestly.
But Hillie knew the whole family was more than that to her. She loved each and every one of them as if they were her own. And there were times like this when she almost wished she’d been born one of them, and not Hilda Hardwick. Either that, or that her real father hadn’t been killed and she’d been brought up as Hilda Norton instead. How different things might have been then! She sometimes wondered about Will Norton, what sort of man he was. Eva had told her he was good and kind, but sadly, she had no photograph of him. And if Nell ever had, Hillie knew what would have happened to it!
But there was no good thinking of what might have been. You couldn’t turn back the clock, could you?
*
‘Oh, Kit, it’s been a lovely evening. Thank you so much.’
They were sauntering back across the bridge, arm in arm, Hillie leaning slightly against Kit’s shoulder. She felt totally at ease, as if all her cares had melted away in his company. They’d come back, of course. But it had been glorious to lose herself in Kit’s warmth and kindness for a few hours.
‘I’m glad you enjoyed it,’ Kit’s voice murmured from somewhere just above her head. ‘I only wish…’
His words trailed off, almost as if he regretted speaking them. Hillie’s eyebrows lifted. She shou
ldn’t press him. But curiosity got the better of her. And he was like an elder brother to her, so they shouldn’t have any secrets.
‘You only wish what?’ she asked lazily.
It was a few seconds before Kit replied. And his answer was preceded by a rueful sigh. ‘I only wish I’d been able to protect you,’ he said at last. ‘From your father. Or Harold, should I say. From everything that’s happened. I should’ve done more than help you catch a train to Scotland.’
‘Bless you, Kit.’ Hillie’s heart swelled with affection for this man who’d been part of her life since the day she’d been born. ‘Harold’s a hard man to fight against. You’ve always been such a good friend to me. And that counts for so much.’
She stopped for an instant, reaching up to give him a peck on the cheek before linking her arm through his again before they wandered on. It was such a natural, spontaneous gesture that she scarcely thought about it as they continued over the bridge.
It was a balmy summer’s evening, reminding Hillie of the time two years previously when she and Jimmy had admired the sunset from that very spot. He’d made her laugh so much with his antics. He rarely did that now. Things had changed between them. The magic had gone and life seemed to be so much more serious.
Hillie glanced up now at Kit’s strong, familiar face. Thank goodness all was still the same with him. The way he’d always looked out for her and Gert since they were children. And Hillie shuddered as she realised she felt more at home, more protected, with Kit than she did with her own husband. There was always a tension with Jimmy nowadays, and it was all to do with Jackson. But after what Luke had told her, she was going to insist that Jimmy stopped working for him. And then all would be well again.
‘And you, Kit,’ she asked as they sauntered along. ‘Still no young lady in your sights?’ He was, after all, a good-looking fellow, she considered, kind and thoughtful, and would make some lucky girl a super catch. In fact, she wondered if it had been Kit she’d been seeing and not Jimmy, Harold wouldn’t have objected. After all, he’d always allowed her to go out with Gert.
At her question, Kit’s handsome face seemed to come over serious. ‘No,’ he answered in a matter of fact tone. ‘I’m concentrating on my career. I’m still determined to be a stationmaster one day.’
‘But wouldn’t you like to settle down ever? Marry and have a family?’ Hillie persisted.
But Kit replied with a shrug. ‘I thought I did. Once. But not now. My work’s more important to me.’
‘But what if the right girl came along and you fell desperately in love?’
Kit gave a wry smile. ‘She won’t.’
‘You don’t know that.’
‘Yes, I do. And you, young lady, are asking too many questions,’ Kit admonished with a chuckle. ‘Just because I take you out for an evening as a friend, doesn’t mean you can give me the tenth degree. Now, I think I’d better get you home. We’ve both got work in the morning. In fact, I’m on an early shift.’
Hillie pulled a face. ‘At least I don’t have to worry about arriving on the dot. It’s Saturday, so no school and Joan can hold the fort till I get there.’
‘So, d’you think she’ll take over from you when she leaves school?’
‘I don’t know.’ Hillie shook her head. ‘I’d feel guilty about lumbering her with it. She’d be trapped for years.’
‘And you’re not?’
They’d reached the house where Hillie and Jimmy had their flat. It was relatively early, dusk only just beginning to fall, and as Hillie turned to Kit, she could still see his face quite clearly. But somehow she couldn’t quite read the expression in his eyes. Concern, yes. But there was something else she couldn’t quite fathom. It unnerved her, setting butterflies fluttering in her stomach.
She answered his question with an arch of her eyebrows, as her mouth curved into a half-smile. ‘Well, goodnight, Kit. And thanks again for a lovely evening.’
He returned her smile, his eyes soft and melting. He bent his head and she felt his cheek brush against hers.
‘My pleasure. Glad you enjoyed it,’ he said, pulling back. ‘Give Jimmy my regards.’ Then he was walking away down the street.
Hillie stood on the pavement, a multitude of emotions strangling her as she searched in her handbag for her keys. She was still grieving for her mum, her lost baby brother or sister, and the father she’d never known. She had found contentment looking after her siblings, but Harold was still a thorn in her side and ever would be. And Jimmy, well, he was exasperating, and she was also worried about what he might be mixed up in. Thank goodness she had people like Gert and Kit and Mr and Mrs P, or she’d probably lose her sanity!
*
‘Promise me!’ she grated at Jimmy through clenched teeth when he finally rolled in at half past eleven and came into the bedroom where she was already in bed, waiting for him. If she hadn’t been worried about waking the other people in the house, she might have yelled at him. She cringed at the thought that this was the first time she’d ever raised her voice to Jimmy. But this was so important and he was wriggling his mouth in reluctance.
‘I know what happened at the factory today,’ she went on, determined to convince him. ‘You can’t keep pushing yourself like this. If you fall asleep at the factory again ’cos you’re out till all hours with this Jackson chap, you’ll get the sack, and then where will we be?’ she demanded, her chest heaving breathlessly.
Jimmy glared at her, pursing his lips. And then he lowered his eyes like a naughty schoolboy who’d been caught in the act of some prank. ‘All right. I promise,’ he finally agreed. ‘But Mr Jackson ain’t gonna like it. And I’ve already promised to do some work for him over the next couple of weeks. But I’ll tell him I can’t do any more after that.’
Hillie drew in an exasperated breath. ‘All right. If he can’t find anyone else. But no more after that!’ she told him in no uncertain terms.
‘Anything to make my girl happy,’ Jimmy chirped, changing tack. ‘But what about me shifts at the pub? We really need the extra money.’
‘Well, yes, I suppose so.’ Hillie nodded reluctantly. ‘At least that doesn’t keep you out so late.’
‘Yeah. So let’s get to sleep, eh? And look, I got this for you. Nipped out at lunchtime, I did, and bought it in Arding and Hobbs. Right under old Braithwaite’s nose. You should’ve seen the look on his face!’
‘Oh, Jimmy, he’s not quite as bad as we thought, you know.’
‘Maybe not. But I don’t think he ever expected to see me buying something like this. Go on. Open it!’ he instructed, beaming gleefully as he thrust a fancy box into her hands.
Hillie frowned. But she couldn’t quell her excitement as she opened the box. Inside was the most exquisite glass vase she’d ever seen, heavy and deeply cut in a symmetrical pattern so that it refracted the light coming from the bulb in the ceiling into all the colours of the rainbow.
‘Oh, Jimmy,’ Hillie breathed in wonderment.
‘It’s what they call lead crystal,’ Jimmy told her knowledgeably, pulling his pyjama jacket on over his head. ‘Sorry it’s only small, but it was all I could afford.’
‘But we can’t afford anything like this.’
‘Oh, yes, we can. Mr Jackson gave us some extra cash last night. And I thought I wanted to treat my girl,’ Jimmy grinned as he got into bed beside her. ‘But I won’t be able to afford anything like this again. Not if I have to stop working for him—’
‘Jimmy,’ Hillie warned. ‘You promised.’
‘Yeah. I know. And I will. Keep me promise. Now,’ he said, turning off the light and groping his way over to the bed, ‘let’s get some shut-eye.’
‘Yes. All right, Jimmy. And Jimmy,’ she said as her eyes adjusted to the near darkness and she was able to replace the vase in its box, which she then carefully stowed under the bed, ‘thank you for the vase. It really is beautiful. I’ll treasure it always.’
She snuggled down under the blankets. She was sorry she’d bee
n so cross with Jimmy. But they really couldn’t risk him losing his job at Price’s. And she did love the vase.
Jimmy’s breathing was soon deep and heavy, so Hillie knew he was asleep. But it took her some time to settle. He hadn’t asked how her evening had been with Gert, and she hoped he didn’t in the morning! She didn’t want to lie to him, but for some reason, neither did she fancy telling him she’d been out with Kit instead. Especially after his gift of the wonderful vase. Not that there’d been anything in the evening she’d spent with Kit. But there was some unnerving sensation niggling at the back of her mind that she couldn’t quite identify.
Chapter Twenty
‘Can we go to the park yet, Hill?’
‘Yes, I do believe we can!’ Hillie beamed down at Daisy. ‘Thanks to Joan’s help, I’ve got everything done nice and early. So go and spend a penny and tidy yourselves up. Can’t have you going to the park looking like ragamuffins, can we?’
The girls didn’t need telling twice. It was near the end of the school summer holidays. Hillie had tried to keep her younger siblings occupied with drawing and painting and suchlike as much as possible. On a nice day, they’d walked the three miles to Buckingham Palace, Hillie and Joan piggybacking the little ones much of the way, and cajoling them with promises of seeing the king. They didn’t, of course, but they did go on to feed the pigeons in Trafalgar Square which had made them squeal with laughter, before marching on to stand below Big Ben as it chimed. Utterly exhausted, they’d caught the bus home from there. Hillie felt satisfied that she’d given the girls a good day out, the nearest they’d ever come to a holiday! Nevertheless, the little ones decided that they’d rather have just gone to the park.
Not so the day that Hillie had actually managed to wheedle some money out of Harold to take them to Regents’ Park Zoo where they’d marvelled over the animals. Trixie was so taken that she announced that evening that she was going to work there when she left school.
