Tempting Fate

by Lisa Mondello

  "Kyle!" the girl called out. Turning to Lauren, she added, "He's in the family room, wrestling with Scotty."

  Judy appeared in the foyer wiping her hands on her apron before holding her hands out to take Lauren and Kristen's coats. "You don't have to scream to the whole neighborhood, Zoey," she said to the teenager. She turned to Lauren and said, "I'm so glad you made it. I hope you didn't have any trouble finding the house."

  "No, I drive right by your house on the way to work, so I knew how to come."

  Lauren sensed Kristen's apprehension and drew her close. It wasn't often that they dined at a stranger's home. But Lauren noticed her eyes light up and she beamed when she saw a little girl with carrot red hair, about the same age as Kristen, come romping down the stairs. Immediately, Lauren noted the little girl's distinctive features did not resemble any of the other members of the family and knew she must also be adopted.

  "Julie!" Kristen squealed. In the next few minutes, they all learned that Julie, Judy's daughter, was a classmate of Kristen's. The two friends bolted upstairs to play with a dollhouse in Julie's room.

  Suddenly feeling alone, Lauren took a deep breath and followed Judy down the hallway to a room off the back of the large eat-in kitchen. When she saw a long blond form stretch out on the floor being tackled by a child dressed in a Batman costume, Lauren realized it must be Kyle. A chuckle bubbled up from inside her and she placed her hand over her mouth to muffle her laughter.

  "Lauren's here," Judy announced. "And don't you dare hurt your brother."

  Kyle twisted around until he saw Lauren. His face was beet red and his hair tousled from rough housing with the little boy. "Okay, Scotty, you won."

  The little caped crusader wound up his fist and slugged Kyle in the stomach.

  "Ooof! I said you won, buddy." Kyle rubbed his stomach and shook his head as he lifted to a kneeling position. "That little guy packs a pretty good punch," he said to Judy. "And you were afraid that I was going to hurt him?"

  Judy playfully smacked him on the back of his head with her hand. "Oh, don't be such a baby. Dinner will be ready in about a half hour or so."

  "It's a good time to feed Max. Care to brave meeting man's best friend?" Kyle asked, now standing. "I'll tell you all about Thanksgiving."

  "Don't remind me," Judy said as she left the room.

  He laughed. "Come on. I'll show you around."

  Kyle clamped the collar of his coat as he and Lauren walked the frozen pebble stoned path toward the carriage house. He shot a quick glance over to Lauren as she walked beside him. The moon light shined against her silky blond hair and gave it a sultry quality against the soft features of her face. She turned and caught him staring and dipped her head in response before returning a coy smile. My, but she was pretty.

  Tonight, she had a particularly noticeable bounce in her step as they walked and he wondered why? Hopefully, it was because she was having a good time, he thought. The way he'd commandeered her into coming to dinner may not have been the smoothest way to approach the woman, but it had been effective just the same.

  "I didn't realize that your sister Julie was in Kristen's class," Lauren said.

  "Julie is so shy. I'm glad she's taken to Kristen. They'll have a good time together today."

  Lauren chuckled. "All Julie had to say was the word 'dollhouse' and Krissy flew up the stairs."

  "Does she have one?"

  "No, but I know she'd love one. What little girl wouldn't?"

  "Is Santa bringing her one?" Kyle said, giving her a wink.

  He watched her expression droop, but she still held on to her smile. "Not this year. Santa's budget is not quite that big."

  Kyle stopped walking when they got to the side door of the carriage house that led to his apartment and he paused. His first thought was that if Lauren was in need, he'd just loan her the money. He knew that she had a hard time accepting help from others, so giving her money as a gift would certainly be out of the question. Money had ceased to be an issue for him since his explosion into the world of real estate development, but the last thing he wanted to do was insult Lauren with an offer of charity.

  With full force, he pulled open the sliding door, flicked the light switch on the wall, and waited until Lauren walked into the garage section of the carriage house. He steered her to a closed set of stairs that rose to the living quarters.

  "I could get her one," he suggested as they climbed the stairs, going against his earlier reasoning.

  Lauren swung around to face him straight on, her mouth agape and her eyes widened. "Certainly not."

  "Why not? It'll be a gift from Santa."

  "It would be a gift from you. Look, I appreciate the offer, but there are lots of things Kristen wants that she doesn't get. It's not like she could possibly get everything on her Christmas list." Lauren took a deep breath and rolled her eyes. "What list? All she asked for was a daddy and she's not going to get that, either."

  She turned and climbed the stairs until she reached the top landing. Kyle noticed the sudden heaviness in her step and regretted bringing up a subject that had caused her unrest.

  Her smile had been so bright when she walked into the family room, almost as bright as when the town Christmas tree was set ablaze. He wondered what she had been thinking to make her expression so radiant. But now, she seemed as down as she had the first night they met and it was eating at his insides.

  Kyle opened the door a crack, and then pulled back after he heard the heavy thump of a charging dog on the other end. "Better let me go first. This dog...well...Max is kind of mammoth," he warned.

  As usual, Max met Kyle at the door with slobbering licks, a heavy tail wag that could knock out a cow, and repeated gnawing on the sleeve of his coat to get his undivided attention.

  "You weren't kidding, he's big!" Lauren gasped.

  "Down, Max." The dog continued jumping. "I said down!" Kyle commanded in a deep authoritative voice.

  Lauren kept her distance. "Have you had him long?"

  "He's a stray. I've only had him a few weeks." He picked up one of his old running shoes that Max had apparently used as an afternoon snack. "As you can see, he's not exactly trained. Okay, boy, what else did you eat?"

  Kyle looked around and assessed the damage while filling the dog's dish with food and water. Thinking it was safer all around to let him out, he put the dog in the side yard on a run while Lauren stayed in the apartment.

  When he returned, Lauren had her coat off and was seated at the pedestal kitchen table reviewing a set of blueprints he'd left out earlier. His footsteps startled her. She darted a glance up at him like a child with her hand caught in the cookie jar and carefully placed the blueprints back on the table.

  "I'm surprised Max didn't eat them," Kyle said. "What do you think?"

  "Of...the blueprints?"

  "Yeah."

  "It's a beautiful house."

  He smiled with pride. "I could take you by to see it some time."

  Her eyes widened. "You mean...it's yours?"

  "Yes. I have a twenty acre lot over on Tower Hill Road. It's still under construction, but it's close to being completed." Well, that was true enough, he thought. He'd been working on the house for the past two years, making so many changes that he thought he'd never finish. In a way, the thought of the project coming to an end depressed the hell out of him. What was he going to do in a big house all alone? That wasn’t the way it was supposed to be when he started the project.

  Lauren picked up the plans and began studying them.

  "I've put a line of full view windows off the family room," he said, pointing to the blueprints. "There's a great view of the hills from the back of the property. A nice flat backyard that goes back a ways before it drops."

  “Nice for kids," she noted.

  “That was the idea. I’d hoped to have a few.”

  She lifted her head from the blueprint and quirked an eyebrow.

  “I had been seeing someone for a while when I decided to bu
ild the house,” he informed her, recalling that it had been Debra who’d actually pressed him to build a house of their own. He would have preferred staying in the carriage house until they decided to start a family. But Debra insisted she’d feel too “confined” and wanted something of her own.

  “So the house was for you and her?”

  He nodded. “I was too deep into construction to stop the project when the relationship ended, so I’m finishing it.”

  “It’s a little big for one person.”

  His sentiment exactly. “I’ve been thinking of putting it on the market when it’s complete.”

  Lauren studied the plans again. "I noticed you put walls in the dining room. You should've knocked them down on both sides to open it up. Makes it more inviting. It's hard to move around in a house filled with family and friends during the holidays when..." Her voice trailed off and she blinked as if she were trying to force something out of her mind.

  "This place is like a zoo during the holidays," he said softly. "But I wouldn't have it any other way. How about you?"

  Her expression drooped again and he silently cursed himself for being the cause.

  "We used to go to my grandmother's house for Christmas every year." Her full lips lifted to a smile, but Kyle noticed a hint of melancholy with her remembrance. "I used to think it was a drag to drive all the way upstate just for the day when I was a kid, but I always loved it." She blinked again, hard this time, and Kyle knew that she was holding back tears.

  "Kristen must love it. Most little kids do."

  "Kristen has never been. We stopped going when..." She shrugged and bit her bottom lip.

  Well, at least that explained the tears and the strong feeling of independence. "When you left your parents," he finished.

  "I didn't leave them. They sent me away." She stood up and fiddled with lock of hair behind her ear.

  He felt her pain as his own like a stab in the gut. It was the same pain he'd felt long ago standing in that courtroom listening to his father's rejection. "I'm sorry," he said, knowing his words sounded feeble at best.

  She looked up at him and he saw a single tear run down the side of her cheek. He cupped that cheek with his hand and brushed the moisture away with his thumb. Her skin was silky and warm and Kyle knew without a doubt that he'd never felt so dizzy just being this close to a woman before. But Lauren Alexander wasn't just any woman.

  "Will you tell me what happened?"

  He expected her to swing around and give him the standard, "It's none of your business" routine, but her eyes held a heaviness that told him she needed to unload her feelings. He guessed that maybe it was burden she'd held far too long.

  # # #

  Chapter Four

  Lauren felt the muscles in her throat tighten. That damned noose! Pulling on the collar of her royal blue turtleneck, she walked to the beige leather sofa in the center of the living room. But she didn't sit down. Her nerves skittered through her veins as her mind raced.

  The room, Kyle's home, felt warm and cozy despite being so large. The living room was square and wide open with a cathedral ceiling boasting wooden planks that soared towards the apex of the room. It was quite a contrast to the slanted walls of her attic apartment. On the far end of the room was an oversized bay window that looked out to the backyard of the main home. An antique pool table stood in front of the window. Along the wall was a stereo cabinet with CDs scattered about and a large screen television. Although it looked like a picture torn from the pages of Macy's furniture catalog, it lacked any kind of detail. The detail that a woman brings to a home, Lauren decided. It had her wondering about the women who had spent time here in Kyle's home, his bed.

  She shook the thought aside. As abrasive as the thought was, it wasn't any of her concern, she told herself. Why should she care how many women had hung their panties on Kyle Preston's bedpost?

  "There's really not much to tell," she murmured, nervously brushing her hand up against her other arm. The words of untruth left a bitter taste in her mouth. There was a whole lot to tell, she just didn't know if she could do it without breaking down for the umpteenth time.

  "If that were the case, you wouldn't be avoiding it."

  "I'm not avoiding anything, Kyle," she countered. "I just don't see any point in rehashing something that can't be changed. It's not worth it."

  She heard him draw a deep breath. "It's at least worth a try."

  Squeezing her eyes shut, she fought the threat of burning tears and desperately tried to keep her breathing even. "You don't understand."

  "But I want to," he said softly. The deep timbre of his voice felt like gentle fingers caressing her soul.

  She swung around to meet his gaze and found nothing but warmth and compassion. "I upset the apple cart by marring their perfect family image."

  He made no move to come closer to her. The distance felt safe. But at the same time, it also felt lonely. So many times she had cried without any arms to hold her. The idea of Kyle's arms wrapped tight around her now seemed comforting, inviting.

  He said nothing, but sat straddling a kitchen chair, resting his arms over the back.

  She drew in a deep breath for courage, for strength, but could find none. "They had very high expectations for me. So did I."

  "Most parents do."

  "My parents aren't most parents." She pushed a lock of hair behind her ear and fiddled with its end, twisting it nervously between her thumb and her index finger. "I was going to be an architect."

  He nodded his head. "I remember seeing a copy of Architectural Digest in your apartment the other night."

  She gave a weak smile. "Well, maybe someday. Anyway, I was the kind of kid who did everything that was expected of me because it was expected. You know, the perfect Honor Society student, the devoted and obedient daughter. I was so predictable. My parents are psychologists, very well respected members of the community."

  "Sounds like something to be proud of."

  "Yes, it is, until your only daughter suddenly becomes unpredictable and starts dating a boy you don't approve of, someone who is nothing but trouble. Except I didn't see Jimmy as trouble then. I saw him as the Prince Charming who finally noticed the mousy, shy me that none of the other boys noticed."

  He gave a lopsided grin. "I doubt that."

  "You didn't know me back then. I admit I was taken with the attention Jimmy showered on me. I ignored all the things people told me about how he was no good, that he'd never change." She saw him flinch, and her heart sank. Would he judge her for her past? "But it was all true, only the truth came too late for me."

  "I can see how a parent would have a problem with their daughter dating someone who was trouble," he said in a low voice. "But that's no reason to break all ties with your family."

  "You don't know the half of it." She bit her bottom lip before going on. "I don't know what they were more upset about, my jeopardizing a promising future by getting pregnant or having everyone in the community watch their pregnant daughter hobble across a stage to collect her High School diploma." Sadly, she always believed it was the latter. How else could it explain her father's reaction when she told him she wanted to keep her baby? How else would it explain the tension that continued to keep them apart now?

  That day. That God awful morning she sat waiting in her hospital room, just two days after Kristen was born.

  Waiting for her parents to come and take her home. Waiting for the nightmare to finally be over. The nurse came into her room repeatedly and asked her if she wanted anything for the pain. But she just said no. Nothing she could give her would make the pain in her empty arms go away. She wasn't allowed to be in the maternity ward. It was better that way, easier for everyone involved, she was told.

  Easier for who? Lauren cried. Certainly not her. But everyone decided it was best to give the baby up for adoption. Lauren would go away to college, just as planned.

  When she graduated and became a successful architect, her parents would eventually ge
t over the "scandal" and everything would get back to normal.

  Except nothing was normal. After tossing in bed for hours the night before, she did the unspeakable. She crept up to the maternity ward in the middle of the night and peeked through the wide glass window of the nursery to see the baby, her baby, wailing at the top of her lungs.

  Her daughter was alone, all alone in a bassinet in the middle of the room with no one to comfort her. What was wrong with them? Why wasn't anyone taking care of her child? Lauren fumed. Why didn't anyone tell me my baby needed me?

  Acting on pure instinct, she stormed into the nursery and scooped the baby into her arms. Kristen, so soft and warm, calmed down immediately and peered up at her mother with wonder shining in her wide eyes. It was then that Lauren understood the true meaning of unconditional love. But then the head nurse snatched Kristen from her arms and ordered her to leave. Another nurse called a security guard and Lauren was hauled away in tears. She tried to tell them it was her baby, but they wouldn't listen. She couldn't see her baby. It was not allowed. She thought she'd died that night.

  When her parents finally arrived with a lawyer to have her sign the adoption papers, she couldn't tell them what she'd done. They said they'd stand by her no matter what, and they had. They supported her when she decided against having an abortion and when Jimmy disappeared from her life. They endured the pain with her when people stared and snickered about how their perfect family wasn't so perfect anymore. Surely they wouldn't desert her if she told them she couldn't give her baby away to strangers.

  In the last second, when the lawyer put the adoption papers in front of her and asked her to sign her rights away, Lauren defied them. Twisting the pen between her fingers, she stared at the blank line marked with an X for what seemed an eternity. In the end, she knew there was no easy way to tell them that all she wanted to do was hold her baby.

  "Everyone makes mistakes, Lauren. It was a long time ago," Kyle said.

  "Yes, it was. And I don't regret any of the mistakes I've made because, if I did, it would mean that Kristen wouldn't be in my life. And I can't imagine that. But it doesn't change anything. I disappointed them and they've never forgiven me for it."