The Duchess (of Malfi)

by Zinnie Harris

  Antonio and wonderfully so.

  They kiss again.

  Duchess so let’s not complicate what should be straightforward.

  She starts to put the ring on his finger, he pulls it back.

  Antonio your brothers –

  Duchess we won’t tell them. We won’t tell anyone for a while

  you’ll be my husband here only in my room.

  Antonio and outside?

  Duchess still my servant, for now.

  He looks at her.

  He puts a hand to her cheek.

  Antonio a secret wedding?

  Duchess can you bear it?

  She puts the ring on him.

  it’s already on your finger, it’s too late

  Antonio I will be everything you need me to be, I’ll talk when you want and be trustworthy, and attentive

  Duchess I know

  Antonio and will laugh at everything, even if I don’t find it funny, actually especially if I don’t find it funny and when your feet are cold and wet in winter –

  Duchess Antonio?

  Antonio yes?

  Duchess you can kiss me now

  He kisses her again.

  His glasses fall off.

  Antonio sorry

  They both laugh.

  Her maid Cariola appears.

  Duchess we’re getting married

  Cariola you’re mad

  Duchess witness it for us, will you

  Cariola if I do, it is an absolute contract

  Duchess last chance, any doubts?

  Antonio she’s right, you’re mad, you realise, you have lost your head

  Duchess I know. Utterly.

  She gets a book and throws it at Cariola.

  read it out

  Cariola bless heaven this sacred Gordian which let violence never untwine, are you sure?

  Duchess keep going

  Cariola and your own sweet affections, like the spheres be still in motion

  Duchess hurry up

  Cariola okay, and quickening and make the like soft music

  it’s quite nice language, don’t you think? Okay, not interested

  blah blah, okay here

  man and wife.

  They kiss.

  Antonio that’s it?

  Cariola well once you have signed, and technically you are supposed to consummate –

  Antonio what does that mean?

  Cariola fuck each other’s brains out

  Antonio very good

  Duchess excellent

  Cariola can you wait at least until I have left the room –

  Antonio I doubt this service would have been prettier if it had been in a church

  Duchess let me put kisses in your hair instead of flowers.

  Cariola I never know whether you are more ruled by a spirt of greatness or of woman

  Antonio greatness

  Duchess woman

  Cariola fearful madness

  Antonio love

  Duchess determination

  Antonio triumph

  Duchess don’t worry, Cariola, stop frowning

  Cariola I am not worried, but heavens, lady!

  Duchess there are days for caution and days to throw it back at the wind.

  what do you want me to do, wait and let my brothers trap me into another loveless match? Or worse, hide myself away forever?

  Antonio dear love?

  Duchess yes

  Antonio you said, we had to make this binding.

  Antonio picks up the Duchess and carries her off.

  She squeals in delight. Cariola is left wondering the sense in all of this.

  TWO: THE CARDINAL

  The Cardinal is standing in his office. A woman, Julia, is with him.

  Cardinal I don’t suppose you’d suck my cock?

  Beat.

  Julia what?

  Cardinal surely it’s crossed your mind?

  Julia what on earth got in to you tonight?

  Cardinal sorry, I thought that was what you were thinking. As you were, you came here to ask for absolution, I will write to the Pope. Have we finished now?

  Julia my husband is here, back in town

  Cardinal I know, and you love him.

  Julia you married us

  Cardinal well at least tell me that you do love him and put me out of my misery

  Beat.

  you know I pine for you.

  Julia you lust for me

  Cardinal I lust for you, I pine for you, the effect on me is the same

  Julia I think it will pass

  Cardinal yes, it will pass, but let’s make it pass together

  Julia you’re out of sorts

  Cardinal is wanting some comfort from you so bad?

  Julia you’re troubled that’s all.

  a little vein on your forehead is sticking out

  He grabs her.

  Cardinal yes, I am troubled, you trouble me

  you trouble me very much

  Julia me?

  Cardinal let me hold you, please

  I’m back to Rome before the end of the week, and Rome is so tedious, let me sustain myself at least with the smell of you

  She holds him.

  say you will be my mistress –

  Julia I can’t

  Cardinal but why? You sucked my cock once – do it again –

  Julia listen –

  Cardinal so what do you intend, to make me sore with longing?

  Julia of course not

  Cardinal then think of it this way and that and roundabout the problem. You are here, I am here, what more is there –

  Julia I only came to ask about the Bible, to tell you that my husband

  Cardinal your husband your husband

  do you have to talk about him so much?

  Beat.

  I want you to be mine, Julia, is that so bad?

  Julia but I am taken.

  Cardinal then don’t come here and lift my hopes –

  Julia the structure we are in

  what is right or wrong, it confuses me

  He comes over to her.

  He kisses her tenderly.

  Cardinal confusion, we can do something about.

  enjoyment and loving is never wrong, there’s the

  answer

  trust me. Okay? And kiss me again?

  He undoes his flies.

  He takes her head and pushes her down to kneel.

  fucking hell.

  fuck off,

  Julia who?

  Cardinal someone is watching

  Julia where?

  He goes and looks out.

  Cardinal out there,

  out the window

  Julia what?

  Cardinal no don’t look

  he’s mocking me

  Julia I can’t see him

  Cardinal oh because he stands back when you come to look

  it’s an image of Christ I think

  Julia Christ?

  Cardinal yes Christ in rags

  sent to scare me

  remind me that all this is shallow

  precarious

  oi, ghost?

  Julia I can’t see

  Cardinal of course you can’t

  it’s a plaything of my mind isn’t it

  sent for my attention only

  some loose connection

  guilt or –

  Julia who is it?

  Cardinal I know who this is, no point even looking, it’s a dead man – a child I knew, grown man now

  I had him buried seven years ago

  Julia for a crime?

  Cardinal yes murder –

  they strung him up and ripped out his guts

  why am I thinking about him tonight?

  She goes over to the window.

  Julia which direction are you looking?

  She looks.

  Cardinal I don’t believe in angels and demons, so get lost

  oi yes, you ghost

  I looked out for you onc
e but you lost your favour,

  you don’t get to haunt me

  Julia who did he murder?

  Cardinal he slit throats for a living, how can I remember?

  does it matter? He did what I told him

  but now his ghost thinks he can haunt me

  come away

  oh suck my cock would you please, Julia, and let’s be done with it

  Julia now?

  Cardinal why not?

  let’s let him see. Do you get your penis sucked in hell, spirit?

  or are you still too much of a baby to get it up?

  Julia stands next to him.

  She is about to kneel down.

  Julia is that the man you are talking about?

  Cardinal in the shadows, yes

  Julia but that’s not a ghost

  Cardinal what?

  He looks.

  Julia that’s your brother

  Cardinal Ferdinand?

  well what the hell is he doing here?

  THREE: FERDINAND

  The Cardinal grabs Ferdinand and they go into a bar

  Ferdinand what if we were too late in our advice?

  Cardinal you look drunk –

  Ferdinand not nearly enough, get me more –

  Cardinal calm down

  Ferdinand calm? She was laughing at us when you had gone

  Cardinal what do you mean?

  Ferdinand she didn’t listen to a word, not one.

  Cardinal brother –

  Ferdinand you were hardly out the door when she was talking about how boring her dead husband was in bed.

  Cardinal no –

  Ferdinand I fear she is already lost.

  Cardinal she knows too much about the marriage bed

  you see that’s the thing –

  Ferdinand I went back to the palace, stood outside her room

  the candle is lit in her bedchamber

  Cardinal for God’s sake

  Ferdinand she is entertaining

  Cardinal I doubt it

  Ferdinand she never keeps the candle lit, even when we were children and afraid of the dark –

  Cardinal maybe she can’t sleep?

  Ferdinand she has got someone with her, that is what it means

  Cardinal so quickly?

  Ferdinand take it from me, we need to do something before this goes too far

  I am her twin, I feel what she feels.

  even the way the breath goes into her body, and tonight –

  Cardinal you need to calm yourself.

  Ferdinand I think you need to excite yourself. Wake up. she is out of control.

  a conversation here, a wise counsel there. It’s nothing.

  she sees herself to be free.

  she sees herself to be in charge

  Cardinal she is a widow now, not the unmarried maid we had before –

  Ferdinand go and stand outside her window.

  Cardinal we have to think with measure this time.

  Ferdinand your measure is not for me

  Cardinal well, it should be, don’t you see your anger is dangerous?

  Ferdinand I’m protecting our family. Our position.

  Cardinal so am I.

  Beat.

  provided she just entertains then it’s no problem, we haven’t lost anything

  Ferdinand I don’t care about the money, is it all about the money to you?

  Cardinal what else is our family but money?

  Ferdinand people, that is what we are

  Cardinal exactly, and this town has lots of them

  oi. Bring some water. Cold

  Ferdinand get off me

  Cardinal this man needs dunked.

  Ferdinand away – cretin

  Cardinal you need to sober up

  Ferdinand you need to find some fire

  Cardinal I have plenty fire

  Ferdinand do something brother. Or fall with her.

  Ferdinand slopes off. One of the people in the bar is watching.

  Ferdinand snarls at them on the way out.

  Cardinal watches him go.

  He drinks something.

  He thinks about what he has heard.

  Bosola comes in.

  The Cardinal looks at him.

  He puts his drink down.

  Cardinal oh, so you do haunt me.

  FOUR: BOSOLA

  Bosola grabs the Cardinal and has his head in a vice.

  Bosola you can’t ignore me –

  Cardinal get off –

  Bosola you raised me

  Cardinal the church raised you, not me, let go

  Bosola you picked me up from the gutter, fed me, clothed me

  Cardinal I had you killed

  Bosola I don’t believe it

  Cardinal believe it

  Bosola I’m your man, you know I am

  Cardinal I’ll bite you

  Bosola I’ll take it as a sign of affection. I’ll bite you back.

  The Cardinal struggles out of his hold.

  Cardinal Jesus man, get a grip.

  Bosola lets go of him.

  The Cardinal looks at him.

  what happened anyway, why aren’t you dead?

  Bosola they sent me on a ship

  I pulled on the oars for six years

  Cardinal fucking hell. You were supposed to be hanged.

  Bosola you would have done that?

  Cardinal I did, I signed the warrant

  I’ll do it again, you lay one hand on me.

  Bosola I didn’t mention your name, I stayed silent

  I took all the flak

  Cardinal you fucked up

  Bosola you fucked up

  Cardinal but you got caught

  Bosola I was loyal

  Cardinal you are loyal because you thought your best chance was with me

  Bosola no, I was loyal because I loved you.

  Cardinal pffttt.

  Bosola you’re the only family I have

  Cardinal family?

  The Cardinal laughs.

  family? You are a different species, let alone family.

  for God’s sake I can smell your breath.

  Bosola please let me kiss your ring

  Cardinal one step and I will call the guard.

  I am the cardinal, you are a murderer.

  Bosola where else can I go, sir?

  If you send me away then where –

  Cardinal I’ll send you to my brother. You want family. He has a job.

  get up off your knees. You aren’t a child now, stop snivelling.

  Bosola lets go of him.

  Bosola what job?

  Cardinal a job that will keep you from starvation. Nothing else.

  Bosola I knew I could trust you

  Cardinal my brother is a bastard, you won’t thank me

  Bosola and Ferdinand.

  Bosola whose throat must I cut?

  Ferdinand ha, he said you were a thug –

  Bosola not a thug, a steadfast servant.

  is this honest work?

  Ferdinand why does it matter what it is?

  Bosola I prefer honesty now. If there is a choice, I mean. on the ship I had time to think.

  Ferdinand watching for the truth and reporting it. Is there more honest than that?

  Bosola the truth is good.

  but there’s always a way that the devil gets in.

  Ferdinand oh, so you’re clever? Alright, but no devil. You stay loyal to me.

  Bosola I’m nothing but loyal, that’s my arrow

  Ferdinand you tell me everything.

  Bosola in utmost detail

  Ferdinand can you ride horses by the way, this is harder if you can’t

  Bosola who am I watching?

  Ferdinand a woman. My twin. You’ll be a bishop to her horses

  Bosola but a spy underneath?

  Ferdinand in a word, yes, but for her own good. I want to know who she sees and when. Where she goes and when. What she does and when.

 
Bosola I am to be like one of your familiars then –

  a little weasel that goes ahead and seeks out

  Ferdinand do you want it or not?

  Bosola I need it.

  I have no other means of living. The Cardinal knows that.

  Ferdinand very good. I’ll recommend you for the role.

  Beat.

  it’s not worth thanks

  Bosola puts his hand out to shake.

  Bosola a bishop to her horses? I like it actually. And at my judgement day I will say my corruption grew out of horse dung.

  Ferdinand anyone ever told you your voice is irritating?

  Bosola that was a joke only

  Ferdinand it was my joke first, the bishop was my pun

  Bosola you’re like me then, enjoy the comfort of words

  Ferdinand take your hand away

  Bosola why? I’m your creature now

  Ferdinand what do you mean, ‘creature’?

  Bosola servants take on the outer form of their masters didn’t you know? Like a boy grows from his father, a flower from a seed. Indeed as you have a slight lean to your body, and walk like there is a rod up your … spine, without being aware of it, before long I would have that stance myself, and as you stay up on your toes, more like a woman than a man in truth but before long I will start, look like this, or actually see your hair is that sickly flame, and nose too long, well, soon you watch I too – will walk like you and talk and think in just your way – and if you are given to spending money on let’s say women or men perhaps because I am not one to judge but –

  FIVE: THE MAID

  In the Duchess’s house, entrance hall. Cariola is putting on her make-up.

  Cariola you talk too much

  Bosola I was a long time silent, I find it makes me a little

  Cariola verbose?

  Bosola loquacious

  Cariola circumlocutory

  Bosola periphrastic

  Cariola repeating

  Bosola I was raised by a man of the church

  Cariola where tedious repetition was the order of the day?

  Bosola I heard there was a job here

  Cariola you heard right

  Bosola I have a good record, a reference –

  Cariola it’s with the horses

  Bosola I love horses

  Cariola you won’t talk them to death?

  Beat.

  Bosola I was silent a long time as I told you.

  whenever I am around people, and one like you,

  I find words spew forward like –

  Cariola boils?

  He smiles.

  Bosola boils yes.