Girls Behind the Camera

by Adele Geras

  “I was not deceiving myself, John,” Miss Braithwaite said. “I had every cause for my expectations.”

  “But I’ve said nothing.” Papa sounded indignant.

  “You had no need to say anything. I knew. I was such a frequent visitor. We did so much together. You have always been kind and courteous to me. We have so much in common, John. There was no need for you to say the words. I took them for granted.”

  “Then forgive me, Ellen. You should not have done so. I have never, not once, said I loved you.”

  “Ah, but can you say you don’t love me? In all honesty?”

  Papa sighed. “I don’t love you, Ellen. I’m so sorry…”

  “Sorry! I should think so! But sorry doesn’t help me. Oh, how will I live? What will I do?”

  Miss Braithwaite was wailing now, and wiping away a fresh flood of tears. Cecily tried to feel sorry for her, but she was so happy on her own account that she didn’t have any room in her head and heart for kindly feelings towards poor Miss Braithwaite. Papa was consoling her as best he could, while guiding her towards the front door and her carriage.

  “We will still be friends,” he said to her. “I like you enormously, Ellen, as you must know. I hope you will feel able to visit us sometimes.”

  “Never!” Miss Braithwaite swept out of the door. “Never again! Farewell for ever, John. I trust you will be happy all alone in this cavernous house.” And she was gone and Cecily watched Papa close the door behind her and lean against it, looking exhausted and pale. She crept back to her bedroom and lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. Tomorrow, she thought, I must go and visit Rosalind and tell her Miss Braithwaite is gone. For ever. Just before she drifted into sleep, she thought: how did Miss Braithwaite dare to call this beautiful house “cavernous”? What a foolish person she is! We shall all be much happier now she’s gone.

  The following morning, Cecily asked permission from Nanny to go and visit the Templetons. She was all ready with stories of how very urgent this visit was, and how she simply had to go, but Nanny was so preoccupied with setting the house in order after the party that she gave her permission at once. Cecily left the house quickly before she could change her mind, and ran to the Templetons’ house where she knocked at the door rather more loudly than she’d intended. When Elsie opened it, Cecily asked to speak to Miss Rosalind, urgently.

  “Miss Rosalind is packing,” said Elsie.

  Cecily was silent for a moment. “Why? I mean, please forgive me, but why is she packing?”

  “She’s going abroad.”

  “She never told me. She never said anything. Are you quite sure?”

  Elsie sighed and stood back from the door. “You’d better come in, Miss Cecily,” she said. “You look as though you’ve lost a sixpence and found a farthing.”

  “May I see her?”

  “I’ll ask. You wait here for a moment.”

  Cecily watched Elsie making her way upstairs and bit her lip to prevent herself from crying. If Rosalind was going abroad so suddenly, there must be a reason. Or maybe she’d been planning the trip for a long time. Cecily pondered this possibility and decided it was impossible. There would have been many opportunities for Rosalind to have said something. Only the other day, she’d been speaking about Venice, and telling Cecily she’d make a good Portia from The Merchant of Venice. She would have mentioned it. It looked as though Rosalind was running away, and Cecily wondered whether her flight could have anything to do with Papa. Cecily thought that it must have been the hint about wedding photographs that had upset Rosalind, but surely she couldn’t be thinking that Papa was really going to marry Miss Braithwaite? Rosalind must have noticed before how Miss Braithwaite always behaved as though she were already mistress of Number Six, Chelsea Walk, and she knew Miss Braithwaite would be invited to the party, so what must have upset her so much was her belief that Papa was considering an engagement and a wedding. It’s lucky that I’ve come to tell her what Papa said to Miss Braithwaite last night, Cecily thought. I’ll let her know that I heard him making it quite clear that he had no intention in the world of ever, ever marrying Miss Braithwaite and moreover, had never loved her.

  “Cecily!” Rosalind came across the hall to her and took both her hands and squeezed them. “Come into the parlour.”

  Cecily sat in one of the armchairs near the window. Rosalind stood at the mantelpiece. There were violet shadows under her eyes as though she had not slept well. She said, “I’m sorry I said nothing to you yesterday…I was not sure of my plans.”

  “Did you know you were going abroad?”

  “No…no it was something of an impulse. I suddenly felt I wanted to be…well, not here in London, at any rate.”

  “When will you come back?”

  “I don’t know. So much depends on…well, never mind.”

  Cecily had been wondering on her way to the Templeton house how she ought to tell Rosalind about Miss Braithwaite’s departure. Should she admit that she had seen Rosalind and Papa together? Should she mention that both she and Sam would be happy to have her as a mother? No, she decided. I’ll simply tell her what happened. She said, “Miss Braithwaite won’t be visiting us again, I think. She and Papa had a quarrel last night. She told him that she thought he wanted to marry her. She said that she thought he loved her. But he doesn’t. He told her so. She was most upset and left in a carriage. She was crying.”

  Rosalind turned even whiter than she was before, and then her face flushed scarlet. She brought her hand to her mouth and bit her knuckles. She said, “How do you know this? Were you there?”

  “I was on the stairs. I couldn’t sleep. I went to see who was making such a noise so late at night.”

  “Did you hear him say that? That he didn’t love her?”

  “Yes. Yes, I did.”

  Rosalind sank on to the sofa and tears came to her eyes. “Oh, Cecily…I’m so sorry. I’m behaving like a schoolgirl. I can’t help it. I gave up hope yesterday in spite of everything.”

  “Hope of what?”

  “I shouldn’t tell you. Your papa said…he said it ought to come from him, but now that you’ve told me this…”

  “I saw you and Papa in the road. Amy said perhaps you’d been to an art gallery together.”

  “We have met…well, on several occasions since he came to this house when I was photographing you. But there was always Miss Braithwaite in the background.”

  Cecily’s heart began to beat a little faster. “Has… have you and Papa…did you say anything…?”

  “No, no, child.” Rosalind smiled. “We have discussed many things but not our feelings. He’s said nothing that might…well, that might lead me to have any expectations. And then yesterday, with Miss Braithwaite hinting about marriage, I could bear it no longer. I felt I must go…get far away from everything here.”

  Cecily looked down at her shoes. What did it all mean? Why had Papa not said anything in the least romantic to Rosalind when they’d been together? I’ll say something, she decided. I’ll tell Rosalind. She said, “Sam and I would be so happy if you were our mama. I wish Papa might have fallen in love with you and married you and then we might all have lived together in our house and been happy.”

  “Oh, Cecily!” Rosalind buried her head in her hands. “I’ve wished for that too… I fear it will not happen now, for surely a gentleman would have made his feelings known and his intentions clear before now. Even with Miss Braithwaite still on the scene. There were many times when he could have spoken and still he said nothing, though he must have known… Never mind. It’s too late now.”

  “But it’s not too late! You don’t have to go abroad. You could stay and find out for yourself… You could go and ask him, face-to-face.”

  “Oh, never. I could never do such a thing. What would he think of me, if such thoughts have never been in his mind?”

  “But there’s no one else. I told you what he said to Miss Braithwaite. He doesn’t love her. He said so clear as clear.”

&nbs
p; “Just because he doesn’t love her, it doesn’t necessarily mean he has…well, tender feelings for me. I’m sure that if he had, he would have found a way to tell me, in spite of all Miss Braithwaite’s schemes.”

  “Papa is a very quiet person,” Cecily said. “He doesn’t do things rashly, or without thinking about them for a very long time. Perhaps he thinks you don’t share his feelings.”

  Rosalind thought about this for a moment. “That’s possible, I suppose, though I did think that I…well, never mind. I will recover from my disappointment while I’m abroad and when I return, I am sure we’ll still be friends, will we not?”

  “You’re determined to go? You won’t change your mind?” It was Cecily’s turn to blink her eyes to stop herself from crying.

  “I must… Kiss me goodbye, Cecily, and make sure to give Sam a hug from me.”

  “He’ll be so sad…we both will.”

  “I know and so will I…but it can’t be helped.”

  Rosalind went with Cecily to the front door. They clung together on the doorstep and then Cecily went down the steps to the street and started to walk home. Why hadn’t Rosalind believed her? She was obviously not entirely persuaded that Miss Braithwaite had gone for ever…yes, that must be it. Why had Papa said nothing to her of his feelings? Really, he was too shy and you couldn’t blame poor Rosalind for thinking as she did. Cecily was so distracted by her misery that she almost bumped into her father, who was striding swiftly in the opposite direction.

  “Cecily?” he said. “Where have you been? You look quite pale and there are shadows under your eyes. Are you ill?”

  “Papa! I’ve been to see Rosalind. She’s going abroad. She’s packing.”

  Papa left Cecily where she was in the middle of the pavement and began to run towards the Templeton house. Cecily followed, as quickly as she could and was in time to see him disappear inside. The sun was shining quite brightly and she decided to wait for him. She imagined the terrible scene that would be going on in the parlour. Rosalind would tell Papa she was going abroad. Would he be broken-hearted? How Cecily wished she had a father whose feelings were easier to guess at! He would probably come out looking crestfallen and sad and they’d go home together. She gathered her skirts about her and perched on the low wall with her back against the railings of the Templeton house. She was sure she wouldn’t have long to wait.

  Cecily was trying to write to Aunt Lizzie with Mossy lying curled up on her lap, which was rather trying. Nevertheless, she had to tell the story of what happened after she’d said goodbye to Rosalind.

  I sat on the wall, she wrote, for ever such a long time. I didn’t dare go and knock on the door at the Templetons’ again, so I went to see Amy and tell her and then we looked out of their front bedroom window for the rest of the afternoon. In the end, Papa and Rosalind came out together arm-in-arm and went off to the river. They are in love, Aunt Lizzie. Amy says so. They spend a great deal of time together and Rosalind comes to Number Six almost every day. Amy says Papa is out of practice because he hasn’t been in love for the six years since Mama died.

  Cecily put down her pen and fell to stroking Mossy’s back. She wouldn’t tell Aunt Lizzie, and she hadn’t yet told Amy, that she’d looked out of the nursery window last night, at twilight, and seen Papa and Rosalind kissing under the walnut tree. She and Sam might have a new mama after all. If there was to be a wedding, she would redecorate the doll’s house in honour of the occasion. The Willow pattern wallpaper Rosalind had given her a few weeks ago lay in her chest of drawers and she would take it out and measure it for some of the main rooms. Cecily leaned her head on her hand and lost herself in happy daydreams, her letter unfinished on the table in front of her. Perhaps Rosalind would let her become a kind of apprentice and come sometimes to the studio where she worked. She would learn very quickly and soon she’d know enough to take every kind of photograph. “Ah yes, Miss Rosalind’s young assistant,” everyone would say. Cecily smiled to herself as she imagined the scene.

  She moved her legs a little and startled Mossy, who jumped down and made for the door, with her tail held high.

  “Goodbye, Mossy,” Cecily said and then turned to write her letter again. Can you keep a secret, Aunt Lizzie? Do not tell anyone, but I think Papa will soon ask Rosalind to marry him and we will have a new mama…

  Cecily had a vision of herself in a bridesmaid’s dress taking off a pretty hat trimmed with roses and ribbons and lace, in order to cover her head with the black cloth again, ready to look through the lens and compose the perfect image of her papa and his new bride. She sucked the end of her pen and wrote: If there is to be a wedding, I might be allowed to take some of the pictures, for a bride cannot photograph herself, can she? I hope so much that Rosalind will let me take her place behind the camera on that day…

  Then she wished her aunt an affectionate farewell, signed the letter with her name, and added a whole row of kisses.

  I was very happy to be asked to join Linda Newbery and Ann Turnbull in telling the stories of the inhabitants of Number 6, Chelsea Walk. This book is a close companion to Girls with Courage, sharing not only a setting but also some of the same characters.

  I love the 1890s. I like the art, the literature and especially the theatre of those years and when I discovered that the first night of Oscar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Earnest was on the 14th of February, I had a jumping-off point for my book.

  I’m interested in photography. It’s changed a lot since the 1890s. Everyone nowadays is fully equipped at all times with a camera in their smartphone. We take selfies, we photograph our lunch, we send pictures around the world on social media and think nothing of it. In the nineteenth century, things were vastly different but photography then was making enormous technological strides which led eventually to a time when everyone is a photographer.

  I’m grateful to Angelo Hornak for guidance in technical matters and also to Laura Cecil for her help and advice.

  It’s been a pleasure to work with Linda and Ann and I’m grateful to Becky Walker for her help with this reissue. I’m really pleased that our books are reappearing in a lovely new format.

  Adèle Geras was born in Jerusalem and before the age of eleven had lived in Cyprus, Nigeria and North Borneo. She studied French and Spanish at Oxford University and taught French before becoming a full-time writer. She has written more than ninety books for children and young adults as well as six novels for adults.

  She lives in Cambridge and has two daughters and four grandchildren.

  To find out more about Adèle Geras, you can visit her website: www.adelegeras.com.

  Discover more inspirational stories from 6 Chelsea Walk, and the girls who lived there throughout history…

  Girls for the Vote

  1914

  LINDA NEWBERY

  When Polly discovers her new neighbours are suffragettes, fighting for women’s right to vote, she is determined to join their protest march. But her parents are scandalized. Will she dare to defy them and do what she thinks is right?

  Girls with a Voice

  1764

  ANN TURNBULL

  Mary Ann’s greatest wish is to become an opera singer, but when she is told she must leave her boarding school, her singing dreams are shattered. Distraught, she comes up with a plan to stay at school, oblivious to the danger it will put her in…

  Girls behind the Camera

  1895

  ADÈLE GERAS

  Cecily is enchanted when she meets Rosalind, a photographer, who seems to be the perfect match for Cecily’s lonely widowed father. But her father’s friend, the dull Miss Braithwaite, keeps spoiling her plans to unite the pair. Will Cecily’s dreams ever come true?

  Coming soon…

  Girls with Courage

  1857

  ADÈLE GERAS

  When Lizzie’s stepfather sends her to stay with relatives in London, Lizzie struggles to adapt to her new life of stiff manners and formal pastimes. She lives for the daily lett
ers from her mother, but when the letters suddenly stop, Lizzie sets out to discover the truth and finds herself on a rescue mission.

  Girls on the Up

  1969

  LINDA NEWBERY

  Andie dreams of becoming an artist and loves living in Chelsea, with the fashion, music and art galleries along the trendy King’s Road. There’s even a real artist living in the flat downstairs. Could Andie’s paintings, inspired by the excitement of the first-ever moon landing, be good enough for her to achieve her dreams?

  Girls at War

  1941

  ANN TURNBULL

  When Josie goes to stay with her cousin, Edith, during the Blitz, she tries to fit in by joining Edith and her friends in teasing a timid classmate. But when the bullying gets out of hand, Josie faces a dilemma: she knows what it feels like to be picked on, but if she takes a stand, will Edith tell everyone her secret?

  For links to websites where you can find out more about photography and famous artists in Cecily’s time and learn about everyday life at the end of the Victorian age, go to the Usborne Quicklinks website at www.usborne.com/quicklinks and type in the title of this book.

  At Usborne Quicklinks you can:

  • See examples of Victorian photographs and daguerreotypes

  • Take a tour of a Victorian home

  • Examine Pre-Raphaelite and Impressionist paintings and find out about the artists

  • See some of the fashions of the day

  Please follow the online safety guidelines at the Usborne Quicklinks website.

  The websites recommended at Usborne Quicklinks are regularly reviewed but Usborne Publishing is not responsible and does not accept liability for the availability or content of any website other than its own, or for any exposure to harmful, offensive or inaccurate material which may appear on the Web. Usborne Publishing will have no liability for any damage or loss caused by viruses that may be downloaded as a result of browsing the sites it recommends.