Double Major (Portland Storm)

by Catherine Gayle

  The two of them got up and hugged. It was a good hug, long and tight. The kind of hug you expect from a mother and a daughter at an important point in their lives. I was pretty sure my mom and Chloe would have had a hug just like that today, too. When Sara and her mother let go, both of them sniffling, they grabbed the coffees they’d been ignoring and each took another stack of napkins as we headed out the door.

  I made sure Dina got into her car and it started. Then I opened the passenger door for Sara. After we watched her mother drive off, I started the engine. “You doing all right?” I asked as I put the car in gear.

  She wiped her eyes and blew her nose again, and she nodded. “Yeah. I’ll be okay.”

  That helped me to breathe a little more freely, at least. We drove a couple of blocks, heading toward the hotel in silence apart from the sounds of her crying.

  “Want to talk about it?” I asked.

  “No.” Sara took another napkin and blew her nose again. “Yeah, I do. Because I’m so fucking confused and I don’t know what to think and who to believe. I want to hate her. I want to continue to believe that my father is infallible, that he would never do something like that. But I think she’s telling me the truth, and that just fucking pisses me off because it’s turned my whole world on its head.”

  I pulled in to the hotel’s parking lot and looked for a spot near the side entrance closest to our room. “Is it necessarily a bad thing to have your world upset like this?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe?”

  “Why would it be bad if it means you get your mother back? And some siblings, too?”

  “I might not like any of them.” She said it in her sulky voice, and sure enough, an adorable pout had taken over her entire face.

  “But you might.”

  “But why wouldn’t Daddy let me talk to her?”

  Now the tears had started again, but at least we could go up to our room and I could hold her and let her cry it out.

  “I don’t know, baby. You’ll have to ask him.” I stood up and stretched my limbs, helped her out, and took her hand in mine. “He texted me earlier. He’s worried about you.”

  Sniffle. Sniffle. “He knows? Did you tell him?” Her tone had gone accusatory.

  “Dina did.”

  “Oh.” Sniffle. “What did he say?”

  “He asked me if you hated him now.” I opened the door to our room and let her go inside ahead of me.

  She went straight into the bathroom and turned on the tap to splash cold water over her face. I grabbed a towel, passing it over to her when she was done. She patted her face dry. As soon as she was done, she dropped the towel on the counter and came into my arms, holding tight around my waist just as she’d held on to her mother only minutes ago.

  “Thank you,” she mumbled against my chest.

  “For what?”

  “For balancing out my crazy today. Hell, you do it every day. But today I was seriously on the edge, and you kept me steady. You kept me from falling over the line and not being able to come back.”

  She had done that herself, though. All I’d done was stay nearby as a reminder of where she wanted to be.

  I kissed the top of her head and stroked a hand over her hair, gently taking the pins and flowers and other things out so it could fall freely down her back and holding her until she felt more normal. I placed all of the hair things on the counter and massaged her scalp until she sighed contentedly.

  “I love you, Cam,” she murmured after a few minutes.

  “Not as much as I love you,” I teased.

  “Bullshit. I fucking love you more than I love coffee.”

  “Fine, but I suppose I should admit that I might love your shoes more than I love you.”

  Sara shoved me away, but her weepy pout had turned to a sexy pout. “Jackass.” She pushed past me out of the bathroom and sat on the edge of the bed…and she eased the hem of her skirt up, inch by inch, revealing those amazing shoes and the ribbons lacing up her calves, her eyes never leaving mine.

  I groaned. I couldn’t help it.

  She let out a sultry, throaty laugh when I dropped to my knees and set to work showing her exactly what her shoes could do to me.

  FOR THE FIRST time in my life, I really wanted a fucking beer.

  It probably wouldn’t help, though. I doubted anything would help. Today was supposed to have been a happy day, a day of celebration, but all I wanted to do was find something, somewhere, to drown my misery.

  World’s worst brother? Check. I hadn’t been there for the biggest moment in Levi’s life to this point.

  Lost my best friend? Check. Razor was going to Buffalo next week to find a place to live and meet the GM and coaches and everyone else involved with his new team. Then he was going to head back to Portland and pack up his house to move it all across the country. We’d only play Buffalo twice a year, so it looked like our relationship was going to devolve to text messages and the odd call here and there.

  Lost my girl before she was ever really my girl? Double check.

  That one was the real kicker. I knew that Zee was right, that she needed to have the opportunity to find out who she wanted to be or she would end up miserable. I didn’t want that for her. I wanted Katie to blossom like a damn butterfly or whatever, to go out into the world and become the best fucking version of Katie Weber she could be. I wanted her to be happy with herself, first, because that was what she needed in order to be happy in a relationship. I got all that. But wanting that for her, understanding her needs…none of that made it hurt any less to walk away, to let her go off and do her thing.

  I’d done everything I could to make it easy for her so she wouldn’t change her mind on account of me, but that only made it hurt more.

  And that just made me want a fucking beer.

  I knew I could get one. I was underage in the States, but that wouldn’t matter. I could have gone out with Razor and the boys who were heading to the bar, and they would have made sure I had all the beers I wanted. I could have knocked on the door to Burnzie’s hotel room and he would have gotten me whatever I wanted, and as much of it as I wanted, no questions asked.

  I didn’t do any of that, though. Instead, I texted Nicky to see if I could hang out with him for the rest of the night. He wasn’t drinking. He probably needed a buddy. Lord knew I did. It didn’t take long for him to respond, telling me to come on up.

  So I didn’t mess around. I headed up to his room. When he let me in, we sat and talked for hours—about Razor leaving, about Levi getting drafted by the Storm, about Katie moving to LA to start her career, about the first girl he’d ever loved and how she’d cheated when he came to the US to play hockey and stomped on his heart.

  Before I was really prepared for it, Nicky was telling me how he’d started taking pills during the season—sleeping pills, pain pills, you name it—because of the headaches he’d been getting from his concussion.

  “I don’t want to take them anymore,” he said. “I got rid of all of them a while back, but then I couldn’t deal. I felt like I needed them again, and it was easy enough to get a doctor to prescribe them.”

  I’d never known anyone who was an addict before. Not really. We’d been pretty sheltered from that stuff when I was growing up. We lived in a good community, my parents had always been on the straight and narrow, and my brothers and I had all taken after them in many ways. I mean, I knew of people who had addictions, but they had never been a real part of my life.

  Until now.

  “Do you have any now?” I asked.

  “Nah.” Nicky shrugged. “I got rid of them again. I’ve done that a few times, but then I always go back and get more.”

  “So it’s not alcohol that’s the problem?”

  “Alcohol just makes it worse. I can drink as long as all I’ve had is alcohol. But if I’ve taken a pill, it screws me up bad. Sometimes I think maybe I need to just stay away from beer, but I don’t know if I’m just telling myself that so I can keep taking the pills
or what.”

  “What can I do to help?”

  “You are helping. All of the boys are.” Nicky leaned back against the headboard, crossing one ankle over the other, his long legs stretched out. “Kally babysat me through the reception. Burnzie brought me back here instead of going out for the night. You’re hanging out here with me, keeping me away from all that shit.”

  “Yeah, I suppose,” I said, but it didn’t feel like enough. It felt as though there was something more I should be doing, only I didn’t have a clue where to start.

  “I talked to Jim and the coaches a lot before I left Portland. There’s a program I’m going to get into back home. Bergy told me about it and got me all set up.”

  “Will it work?”

  “I have to make it work,” Nicky said. “I don’t have many options left. If I can’t sort my shit out, I’m going to lose my spot on the team. Then what?”

  “Then you’d better make it work.”

  He stared at me so long it made me squirm, and I was pretty sure I was blushing. I didn’t know what the hell he was staring at me like that for, and I didn’t have the first clue what else to say to him.

  After a minute, he ended my suspense. “You’re a good man, Babs. Katie knows that. She’s not going to forget it.”

  I had been a hell of a lot more comfortable talking about Nicky’s issues than I was talking about me and my fucking broken heart. I shook my head, but I didn’t know what I was trying to shake off other than the fist that seemed to be squeezing my chest.

  “Don’t brush that shit off, man. That girl is as crazy about you as you are about her. She’ll come back someday, and you two will both be better for it.”

  “She might not come back. She might hit it big in LA. She might meet someone else.” She might forget about me.

  “There are a hell of a lot of mights in this world, Babs. You can’t let them rule you.” He sat up again, curling one leg underneath him and leaning forward. “Why don’t you come spend some time in Sweden this summer? Clear your head some. You can visit me while I’m in treatment, if you want. Maybe meet some other girl to help you pass the time until Katie comes back.”

  I didn’t want to meet another girl. I only wanted Katie. The fact of the matter, though, was I couldn’t have Katie right now, and I might not ever be able to have her. I wasn’t ready to just move on, though. I couldn’t wrap my head around the idea of being with someone else when all I wanted was her. Maybe someday I could. But not now.

  I started to shake my head, but Nicky cut me off before I could shoot his idea down.

  “Bring your brothers and your parents. Make it a family vacation. Lord knows you’ve got enough money to pay for something like that right now with all your bonuses. Hell, don’t come to Sweden if you don’t want to. Go to Australia or Cancun or Timbuktu for all I care. Just get away for a while so you can get your head straight. The boys are going to need you to have your shit together when the season starts.”

  “We need you, too,” I said pointedly.

  “Which is why I’m going to this treatment program. I’m taking care of my shit; you have to get a handle on yours.”

  “Okay. Make me a deal.”

  Nicky raised a brow. “What kind of deal?”

  “We both come back to training camp ready to focus on hockey and nothing else. No issues with pills or beer or any of that shit. No letting the fact that Katie’s gone fuck with my head and screw up my game. We both go in with one goal, and that’s to get the Storm to the Stanley Cup Finals. You and me—we’re going to put the team on our backs and we’re going to get there.”

  “Yeah.” Nicky gave a deliberate nod, and I could see the determined look come back into his eyes, the sort of expression that he always got right before we went out on the ice for a game. “Yeah, that’s a deal.”

  “We do whatever it takes, and we drag the rest of the boys along with us. Then there won’t be time or energy to think about all the rest of that crap.”

  A slow smile curled his lips. “You really are a good man, Babs. Never doubt that, and don’t let yourself think that Katie doesn’t care just as much about you as you do about her.”

  Why the hell did he have to keep bringing it back to Katie?

  “Get the fuck out of here,” Nicky said, standing up and stretching his arms over his head. “I need sleep, and you need to call your brother. It was a big day for him, and you’ve been busy all day.”

  “Yeah, all right.” I got up, and Nicky put out a hand to shake mine. As soon as I grabbed hold of it, he pulled me in and slapped my back.

  “And I meant it about coming to Sweden,” he said. “It’s a great place to refresh and get your head clear for the new season.”

  “I’ll think about it.” It would be nice to be able to take my family somewhere. We could celebrate Levi’s draft by having a vacation together, and it would be easier to avoid thinking about how much my heart hurt from Katie leaving if I was surrounded by my brothers. They never let me sulk too much.

  He walked me to his door and locked it behind me, and I pulled out my phone as I headed for the stairs to go to my own room. It was late—almost midnight—but there wasn’t a chance Levi was already in bed. Not after experiencing a high like he’d had today. I hit the speed dial button to call him.

  “About time, asswipe,” he said as soon as he picked up. “You think a text message is enough to celebrate?”

  “Sorry. It’s been a long day.”

  “Yeah. Tell me about it.” Levi sighed dramatically. “I still can’t believe this happened… Hey, sorry about Razor.”

  “It’s all right,” I said as I put the key card in my door. “These things happen in this business. It’s not your fault.”

  “I know. I’m still sorry, though.”

  “Listen, I was thinking we could go somewhere as a family to celebrate. How do you feel about Sweden?”

  “I thought you said Swedes were weird.”

  “They are, but who the hell isn’t?” I’d spent enough time with Kally over the last few months to learn that weirdness is all in the eye of the beholder, anyway. “Come on, it’ll be good to get away for a while.”

  “All right. Weird Sweden it is.”

  I flopped down on the bed in my room with a grin on my face.

  Not that I didn’t still hurt. The ache of letting Katie walk away wasn’t going to ease for a long time. But there was still a lot of good in my life. I had a great family, I had good friends, and I had the job that most kids in Canada grow up wishing for.

  No matter what, life goes on.

  I just had to believe that someday, some way, Katie would find her way back.

  Catherine Gayle is a bestselling author of Regency-set historical romance and contemporary hockey romance with a New Adult feel. She’s a transplanted Texan living in North Carolina with two extremely spoiled felines. In her spare time, she watches way too much hockey and reality TV, plans fun things to do for the Nephew Monster’s next visit, and performs experiments in the kitchen which are rarely toxic.

  If you enjoyed this book and want to know when more like it will be available, be sure to sign up for Catherine’s mailing list. You can find out more on her website, her blog, at Red Door Reads, at Hockey Romance, at Facebook, on Twitter, and at Goodreads. If you want to see some of her cats’ antics and possibly the occasional video update from Catherine, visit her YouTube account.

  DOUBLE MAJOR is book 4.5 in the Portland Storm series. Earlier books in the series are BREAKAWAY, ON THE FLY, TAKING A SHOT (a novella available individually or as part of the anthology SEDUCED BY THE GAME. If purchased in the anthology, all author royalties are being donated to Hockey Fights Cancer.), LIGHT THE LAMP, and DELAY OF GAME. Book 5, IN THE ZONE, will release on November 20, 2014.

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Page

  Table of Contents

  Dedication

  Trademark Acknowledgments

  Warm-Up
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br />   1st Period

  2nd Period

  3rd Period

  Overtime

  About the Author

  Other Catherine Gayle Titles

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Page

  Table of Contents

  Dedication

  Trademark Acknowledgments

  Warm-Up

  1st Period

  2nd Period

  3rd Period

  Overtime

  About the Author

  Other Catherine Gayle Titles