Great was the holy conversation that the anchoress and this creature had through talking of the love of our Lord Jesus Christ for the many days that they were together.
This creature revealed her manner of life to many a worthy clerk, to honoured doctors of divinity, both religious men and others of secular habit, and they said that God wrought great grace in her and bade her not to be afraid – there was no delusion in her manner of living. They counselled her to be persevering, for their greatest fear was that she would turn aside and not keep her perfection. She had so many enemies and so much slander, that it seemed to them that she might not bear it without great grace and a mighty faith.
Others who had no knowledge of her manner of behaving, except through outward observations alone or else through the gossip of other people perverting the judgement of truth, spoke very badly of her and caused her to have much more enmity and distress than she would otherwise have done, if it had not been for their evil talk. Nevertheless, the anchorite of the Preaching Friars in Lynn – who was her principal confessor, as is written before – took the responsibility on his own soul that her feelings were good and sure, and that there was no deception in them. And through the spirit of prophecy he told her that when she went to Jerusalem she would have a great deal of trouble with her maidservant, and that our Lord would try her severely and test her very strictly.
Then she replied, ‘Ah, good sir, what shall I do when I am far from home and in strange countries, and my maidservant is against me? My physical comfort would then be all gone, and I would not know where to get spiritual comfort from any confessor such as you are.’
‘Daughter, don’t be afraid, for our Lord will comfort you himself, whose comfort surpasses all others and, when all your friends have forsaken you, our Lord shall cause a broken-backed man to escort you wherever you wish to go.’
And it happened just as the anchorite had prophesied in every detail and as – I trust – will be written more fully later on.
Then this creature said to the anchorite in a kind of complaining way, ‘Good sir, what shall I do? He that is my confessor in your absence is very sharp with me. He won’t believe my feelings; he sets no store by them at all; he considers them merely trifles and jokes, and that is most painful to me, for I am very fond of him and would gladly follow his advice.’
The anchorite, answering her, said, ‘It is no wonder, daughter, that he can’t believe in your feelings so soon. He knows very well that you have been a sinful woman, and therefore he thinks that God would not be on terms of homely familiarity with you in so short a time. After your conversion I would not, for all this world, be so sharp with you as he is. God – because of your deservingness – has appointed him to be your scourge, and he deals with you as a smith with a file makes the iron bright and clear to the sight, which before appeared rusty, dark and nastily coloured. The sharper he is to you the more clearly your soul shines in God’s sight, and God has ordained me to be your spiritual fosterer and your comfort. Be humble and meek, and thank God for both the one and the other.’
… On one occasion,14 before this creature went to her prayers to discover what answer she should give to the widow, she was commanded in her spirit to bid the widow leave her current confessor, if she would please God, and go to the anchorite at the Preaching Friars in Lynn and tell him all about her life. When this creature gave this message, the widow would not believe her words, nor her confessor either, unless God would give her the same grace that he gave this creature, and she ordered this creature that she should not come to her place any more. And because this creature told her that she had to feel love and affection for her confessor, therefore the widow said it would have been a good thing for this creature if her love and affection were directed as hers were.
Then our Lord commanded this creature to have a letter written and send it to her. A master of divinity wrote a letter at the request of this creature and sent it to the widow, with the following clauses: one clause was that the widow should never have the grace that this creature had; another was that, although this creature were never to come inside her house, it would greatly please God.
Our Lord said again to this creature, ‘It would be more profitable for her than this whole world if her love were fixed as yours is. And I command you to go to her confessor, and tell him that, because he will not believe your words, they shall be separated without him noticing, and those who are not confided in by her shall know this before he does, whether he likes it or not. So, daughter, you may see here how hard it is to separate a man from his own will.’
And this whole series of events fell out indeed, as this creature had foretold, twelve years afterwards. Then this creature suffered a great deal of tribulation and unhappiness because she said these words, as our Lord commanded her to. And she was always increasing in the love of God and was bolder than she was before.
Chapter 19
Before this creature went to Jerusalem, our Lord sent her to a very respectable lady, so that she should speak to her confidentially and do his errand to her. The lady would not speak with her unless her confessor were present, and she said she was happy with this. And then, when the lady’s confessor had come, the three of them went into a chapel together, and then this creature said with great reverence and many tears, ‘Madam, our Lord Jesus Christ bade me tell you that your husband is in purgatory, and that you shall be saved, but that it will be a long time before you get to heaven.’
And then the lady was displeased, and said her husband was a good man – she didn’t believe he was in purgatory. Her confessor sided with this creature, and said it might very well be as she said, and backed up her words with many holy tales.
And then this lady sent her daughter, and others of her household with her, to the anchorite who was principal confessor to this creature, in order that he should give her up, or else he would lose her friendship. The anchorite said to the messengers that he would not forsake this creature for any man on earth, for to such persons as would inquire of him about her manner of behaving and what he thought of her, he said she was God’s own servant, and he also said she was the tabernacle of God.
And the anchorite said to her, to strengthen her in her faith, ‘Though God should take from you all tears and conversings, believe nevertheless that God loves you and that you shall be sure of heaven for what you have had before, for tears with love are the greatest gift that God may give on earth, and all men that love God ought to thank him for you.’
Also, there was a widow who asked this creature to pray for her husband and discover if he had any need of help. And as this creature prayed for him, she was answered that his soul would be thirty years in purgatory, unless he had better friends on earth. She told this to the widow and said, ‘If you give three or four pounds for him in masses and in alms-giving to poor folk, you will highly please God and greatly ease the soul.’
The widow took little heed of her words and let it pass. Then this creature went to the anchorite and told him how she had felt, and he said the feeling was from God and the deed in itself was good, even though the soul had no need of it, and advised that it should be fulfilled. Then this creature told this matter to her confessor, in order that he should speak to the widow, and so for a long time this creature heard no more of this matter.
Afterwards our Lord Jesus Christ said to this creature, ‘That thing I ordered should be done for the soul is not done. Ask now your confessor.’
And so she did, and he said it was not done.
She replied, ‘My Lord Jesus Christ told me as much just now.’
Chapter 20
One day as this creature was hearing mass, a young man and a good priest was holding up the sacrament in his hands over his head, and the sacrament shook and fluttered to and fro just as a dove flutters her wings. And when he held up the chalice with the precious sacrament, the chalice moved to and fro as if it would have fallen out of his hands. When the consecration was done, this creature marvelled at the sti
rring and moving of the blessed sacrament, wanting to see more consecrations and looking to see if it would do so again.
Then our Lord Jesus Christ said to the creature, ‘You will not see it any more in this way; therefore thank God that you have seen it. My daughter Bridget never saw me in this way.’1
Then this creature said in her thought, ‘Lord, what does this betoken?’
‘It betokens vengeance.’
‘Ah, good Lord, what vengeance?’
Then our Lord replied to her, ‘There shall be an earthquake.2 Tell whoever you wish, in the name of Jesus. For in truth I tell you, just as I spoke to St Bridget, just so I speak to you, daughter, and I tell you truly that every word that is written in Bridget’s book is true, and through you shall be recognized as truth indeed. And you will succeed, daughter, in spite of all your enemies; the more envy they have of you for my grace the better shall I love you. I would not be righteous unless I loved you, for I know you better than you do yourself, whatever people say about you. You say I have great patience with people’s sins, and you say truly, but if you saw people’s sins as I do, you would marvel much more at my patience, and sorrow much more at people’s sin, than you do.’
Then the creature said, ‘Alas, beloved Lord, what shall I do for the people?’3
Our Lord answered, ‘It is enough for you to do as you do.’
Then she prayed, ‘Merciful Lord Christ Jesus, in you is all mercy and grace and goodness. Have mercy, pity and compassion on them. Show your mercy and your goodness upon them, help them, send them true contrition, and let them never die in their sin.’
Our merciful Lord said, ‘I may do no more for them in my righteousness, daughter, than I do. I send them preaching and teaching, pestilence and battles, hunger and famine, loss of their goods, with great sickness and many other tribulations, and they will not believe my words nor will they recognize my visitation. And therefore I shall say to them that “I made my servants pray for you, and you despised their deeds and their lives.” ’
Chapter 21
At the time that this creature had revelations, our Lord said to her, ‘Daughter, you are with child.’ 1
She replied, ‘Ah, Lord, what shall I do about looking after my child?’
Our Lord said, ‘Daughter, don’t be afraid, I shall arrange for it to be looked after.’
‘Lord, I am not worthy to hear you speak, and still to make love with my husband, even though it is great pain and great distress to me.’
‘Therefore it is no sin for you, daughter, because it is reward and merit instead for you, and you will not have any the less grace, for I wish you to bring me forth more fruit.’
Then the creature said, ‘Lord Jesus, this manner of life belongs to your holy maidens.’
‘Yes, daughter, but rest assured that I love wives also, and specially those wives who would live chaste if they might have their will, and do all they can to please me as you do. For though the state of maidenhood be more perfect and more holy than the state of widowhood, and the state of widowhood more perfect than the state of wedlock, yet I love you, daughter, as much as any maiden in the world.2 No man may prevent me from loving whom I wish and as much as I wish, for love, daughter, quenches all sin. And therefore ask of me the gifts of love. There is no gift so holy as is the gift of love, nor anything so much to be desired as love, for love may gain what it desires. And therefore, daughter, you may please God no better than to think continually on his love.’
Then this creature asked our Lord Jesus how she should best love him, and our Lord said, ‘Be mindful of your wickedness, and think of my goodness.’
She replied, ‘I am the most unworthy creature that you ever showed grace to on earth.’
‘Ah, daughter,’ said our Lord, ‘do not be afraid. I take no notice of what a man has been, but I take heed of what he will be.3 Daughter, you have despised yourself; therefore you will never be despised by God. Bear in mind, daughter, what Mary Magdalene was, Mary of Egypt,4 St Paul, and many other saints that are now in heaven, for of unworthy, I make worthy, and of sinful, I make righteous. And so I have made you worthy to me, once loved and evermore loved by me. There is no saint in heaven that you wish to speak with, but he shall come to you. Whom God loves, they love. When you please God, you please his mother and all the saints in heaven. Daughter, I take witness of my mother, of all the angels in heaven, and of all the saints in heaven, that I love you with all my heart, and I may not forgo your love.’
Our Lord said then to his blessed mother, ‘Blessed Mother, tell my daughter of the greatness of love I have for her.’
Then this creature lay still, weeping and sobbing as if her heart would burst for the sweetness of speech that our Lord spoke to her soul.
Immediately afterwards, the Queen of Mercy, God’s mother, chatted to the soul of the creature, saying, ‘My beloved daughter, I bring you sure tidings, bearing witness for my sweet son Jesus, with all angels and all saints in heaven who love you most highly. Daughter, I am your mother, your lady and your mistress, to teach you in every way how you shall please God best.’
She taught this creature and informed her so marvellously that she was embarrassed to tell it to anybody, the matter was so high and so holy, except to the anchorite who was her principal confessor, for he was most knowledgeable in such things. And he charged this creature – by virtue of obedience – to tell him whatever she felt, and so she did.
Chapter 22
As this creature lay in contemplation, weeping bitterly in her spirit, she said to our Lord Jesus Christ, ‘Ah, Lord, maidens are now dancing merrily in heaven. Shall I not do so? Because I am no virgin, lack of virginity is now great sorrow to me. I think I wish I had been killed as soon as I was taken from the font, so that I should never have displeased you, and then, blessed Lord, you would have had my virginity without end. Ah, dear God, I have not loved you all the days of my life, and I keenly regret that; I have run away from you, and you have run after me; I would fall into despair, and you would not let me.’
‘Ah, daughter, how often have I told you that your sins are forgiven you and that we are united together in love without end? To me you are a love unlike any other, daughter, and therefore I promise you that you shall have a singular grace in heaven, daughter, and I promise you that I shall come to your end, at your dying, with my blessed mother, and my holy angels and twelve apostles, St Katherine, St Margaret and St Mary Magdalene, and many other saints that are in heaven, who greatly worship me for the grace that I give to you, your God, your Lord Jesus. You need fear no grievous pains in dying for you shall have your desire, which is to have your mind more on my Passion than on your own pain. You shall not fear the devil of hell, for he has no power over you. He fears you more than you do him. He is angry with you, because you torment him more with your weeping than all the fire in hell does; you win many souls from him with your weeping. And I have promised you that you should have no other purgatory than the slanderous talk of this world, for I have chastised you myself as I would, by many great fears and torments that you have had with evil spirits, both sleeping and waking, for many years. And therefore I shall preserve you at your end through my mercy, so that they shall have no power over you either in body or in soul. It is a great grace and miracle that you still have your wits, considering the vexation that you have had from them in the past.
‘I have also, daughter, chastised you with the fear of my Godhead, and many times I have frightened you with great winds and storms, so that you thought vengeance would have fallen on you for sin. I have tested you by many tribulations, many great griefs and many grievous sicknesses, so that you have been anointed for death, and entirely through my grace you have escaped. Therefore don’t be at all afraid, daughter, for with my own hands which were nailed to the cross I shall take your soul from your body with great joy and melody, with sweet smells and fragrances, and offer it to my father in heaven, where you shall see him face to face, dwelling with him without end.
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��Daughter, you will be very welcome to my father, and to my mother, and to all my saints in heaven, for you have given them drink very many times with the tears of your eyes. All my holy saints shall rejoice at your coming home. You shall be fulfilled with every kind of love that you desire. Then you will bless the time that you were made and the body that has [dearly] redeemed you. He shall rejoice in you and you in him without end.
‘Daughter, I promise you the same grace that I promised St Katherine, St Margaret, St Barbara,1 and St Paul, in that if any person on earth until the Day of Judgement asks any boon of you and believes that God loves you, he shall have his boon or else something better. Therefore those who believe that God loves you shall be blessed without end. The souls in purgatory shall rejoice at your coming home, for they well know that God loves you specially. And men on earth shall rejoice in God for you, for he shall work much grace for you and make all the world to know that God loves you. You have been despised for my love, and therefore you shall be honoured for my love.
‘Daughter, when you are in heaven you will be able to ask what you wish, and I shall grant you all your desire. I have told you before that you are a singular lover of God, and therefore you shall have a singular love in heaven, a singular reward and a singular honour. And because you are a maiden in your soul, I shall take you by the one hand in heaven, and my mother by the other, and so you shall dance in heaven with other holy maidens and virgins, for I may call you dearly bought and my own beloved darling. I shall say to you, my own blessed spouse, “Welcome to me, with every kind of joy and gladness, here to dwell with me and never to depart from me without end, but ever to dwell with me in joy and bliss, which no eye may see, nor ear hear, nor tongue tell, nor heart think, that I have ordained for you and for all my servants who desire to love and please me as you do.” ’
The Book of Margery Kempe Page 8