by Calia Read
“He’s been giving me a headache since the minute I met him,” Severine admitted.
Macsen laughed. He didn’t keep it restrained like everyone else would. It was carefree and easy. The soothing reverberations subdued all the anxiety that came from talking to Thayer.
“Most of the time, he’s not such a douchelord.”
Severine laughed dryly. “So I bring out the worst in him?”
He mulled over her question and reluctantly nodded his head. “For reasons you won’t ever understand, yeah, you do.”
“Perfect.”
He pressed his shoulder against her, and she moved closer. All she needed was a barrier to lean against, and his was impenetrable.
They stood in a congenial silence. Severine was afraid to break the moment. It was the most at ease she had been around the Sloan brothers. God, this was a requisite for her emotions.
“Is this why you lured me here? So you could talk about Thayer?”
“I’m not blind. I could see how tense you were.”
Severine was rigid because she was trying to keep hold of herself. She was close to yielding, which was almost ridiculous. How could she disinherit feelings that were never there?
“Let’s not talk about your brother.”
“After tonight, are you ever gonna voluntarily see me again?”
Severine walked forward and looked over her shoulder to smirk at him. “Outside of class?”
“Yeah.”
“You guys are strange,” Severine noted.
Macsen nodded instantly. “It comes with the last name.”
“There’s a lot of weird tension between you guys.”
“There always will be.”
“So I probably shouldn’t,” Severine said finally.
“Are you wanting me to beg to see you?”
Severine wagged her finger in his direction. He reached out to grab it. “I think you’re begging to beg.”
“Do I need to ask you?” Macsen asked with a playful grin. His light-green eyes were bright. They were going to raze her until there was nothing left. Severine was okay with that. He could get as close to her as he wanted. There was no need to run from him.
“Yes,” Severine said in a hushed tone.
“See me outside of class, apart from all this bullshit. I want to see just you.”
Her smile slightly dimmed over his words. Macsen grinned, grabbed her fingers, and held them loosely within his grasp. His words took her off guard. Something furled around in her belly. It spread and reached for her heart, each time never quite grabbing on.
“Yeah,” she said slowly. “I’d like that.”
Something was languidly forming between them. They were starting to fit together. She was going to remember this moment. It was going to stay with her.
The two of them walked back to their table. Thayer’s eyes seemed to be waiting for her before she had rounded the corner. They always seemed selected in her direction.
Call it vicious, but she held his eyes. Right now, she was involved in the world’s longest staring contest. She was going to win. All of her attention was on Thayer. When Macsen’s palm touched her lower back, she barely registered the contact.
What was worse than being around two Sloan brothers? Having one physically touch her skin, and the other’s gaze sear her to her very origin. He was too far to know or realize, but his gaze felt more real than skin-to-skin contact.
Thayer’s eyes flicked away from her body and back to his computer screen. He repeated the process five times. Each time she felt it rattle her body.
By the time she and Macsen reached the table, her legs were wobbling worse than an infant learning how to take their first steps. She sat and re-opened the textbook she had given up on minutes—or maybe it was hours—ago.
Macsen’s knee brushed against her. Severine’s neck snapped up.
“So you asked me, but I never got the chance to ask, what’s your ambition?”
Her eyelids moved quickly as she tried to focus on his question. “Uh. To spotlight at all major strip clubs.”
Thayer coughed loudly. Macsen’s laughter was abrupt as he glanced at her with round eyes. “Come on, be serious.”
“Ah, well, seriously?” Severine paused and looked over at him. “I want to be a dermatologist.”
“Really?” he asked with wide eyes.
It wasn’t the most typical major. She knew that. People’s reactions would never get old. “What? Did you think I was majoring in, like, beerology?”
“No,” Macsen grumbled. “I just didn’t expect that answer.”
Severine held her hands in the air. “I take it back! I really wanna major in nursing. So when Halloween comes around, I’ll save money on my costume.”
“Now that is fucking genius,” Thayer commented.
Everyone turned his way. It was hard to tell what exactly was running through his head as he stared fixedly at his laptop.
All he wanted was to get under her skin. It would irritate her, and it would drive him only further to provoke.
“Anyway,” Macsen drew out slowly. “I have to know. What makes you wanna be a dermatologist?”
This was okay territory. She could talk about her goals all day long. “The question should be, why wouldn’t I want to be a dermatologist?” Both Thayer and Macsen stared at her like a third eye had grown between her eyebrows. “Stop looking at me like that! It’s fascinating to me, the body’s hormones, how our bodies deal with stress, lifestyles. I really want to specialize in Dermatopathology. It’s more along the lines of acne, or any skin diseases, but cosmetic dermatology is something I’ve thought about for a while.” She stopped talking to finally realize that she was rambling. More than rambling, she was telling them her dreams. It was more than she really wanted to relay to anyone.
Thayer whistled loudly. “Wow.”
Severine shrugged self-consciously. “My major could still change, so you never know.”
“Sounds likes you have it all planned out, though,” Thayer commented.
When she looked at him, she saw understanding in his expression. Admiration was written clearly in his gray eyes. “I do.”
Thayer paused to look at her a little longer before his head turned to Macsen. His expression showed he knew a secret that no one else knew. “So how was Haley’s?”
Lily made eye contact with Severine and quickly looked away.
“I didn’t go to Haley’s, dumbass.”
“Seriously though, you better watch the fuck out. She’ll make a voodoo doll of you,” Thayer warned. “If you wake up screaming tonight, I’ll know why.”
“Dick,” Macsen responded back instantly. How many times did they bite each other’s heads off like this?
“Oh, this is sweet,” Severine said with false happiness. “Have you guys always been this close?” The words poured out of her mouth. She couldn’t really help it. Things were starting to get awkward. Quick.
“So, Severine,” Thayer said her name sharply, and she flinched.
Her expression was cautious while his was harsh. She felt like a child caught doing something wrong.
“Yeah?”
“Have you and Mac known each other long?”
Severine quickly glanced at Ben. He shrugged his shoulder. She leaned close. “I’ve known him the same amount of time as I’ve known you.”
“So you don’t know him.” He turned away. A muscle along his jaw ticked. Severine was starting to see that it was an action he did when he was pissed. His mouth opened and snapped shut tightly. Thayer wanted to say something. Severine didn’t know if she was grateful or so curious she was pissed.
“Well, I’m done studying,” Lily pronounced slowly.
Thank God. Severine gave Lily a grateful smile from across the table. They couldn’t leave at a better time.
Everyone moved out of their seats, gathering their books. Severine hefted her bag up and over her shoulder and made a dramatic groan.
“Give it here.” Tha
yer reached out and plucked her bag from her shoulder. “It looks like a lot of pressure.”
It was a simple statement, a statement that anyone could have said. That was the difference between Thayer and everyone else. Nothing that came out of his mouth was simple, and it sure as hell wasn’t innocent. He said it to provoke.
Severine took it seriously. Every space in between his words scared the shit out of her.
There would never be a truce between them. The two of them had too much pride.
He walked ahead of everyone else, leaving Severine to stare at his retreating form. No one heard the exchange. She lost that round.
* * * * *
“What was that?” Lily asked the minute Severine shut the car door.
Severine messed with the radio station. “What you just witnessed was me being a total idiot. And why I was right.”
Lily pulled away from the library, a smirk firmly planted on her lips. If anything good came out of tonight, it was Lily opening up to Ben. “So did you have fun with Ben?”
“Nuh-uh.” Lily shook her head back and forth. “You better tell me what that was back there!”
Severine’s fingers combed through her dark strands. She gripped the strands tightly before letting loose. “That was an epic disaster.”
“Maybe for you; Ben and I were entertained.”
“He wasn’t even supposed to show up,” Severine muttered. They didn’t have much further to go until they reached their dorm. She didn’t care and uncoiled her legs to rest on the dashboard. Her mind felt worn. It had just been down the most twisted, warped hole. All it wanted was a break.
Lily drummed her fingers loudly on her steering wheel. “Okay. You wanna know something?”
“If it goes along the lines of ‘Thayer’s transferring schools,’ then sure!”
When Lily bit her lip, Severine knew it wasn’t good. That was Lily’s sign that she was going to admit something she didn’t want to share.
“IknewThayerwascoming.” Her words came out as one word. Severine still heard it loud and clear.
“Ahh!” Severine groaned. “Why?”
“I know you don’t like the dude!” Lily held her hands briefly in the air to show her innocence. “But he asked Ben if he could come. Besides, weren’t you the one that said nothing bad can happen in a library?”
That was when she was certain he and Macsen wouldn’t show up. Leave it to the Sloan brothers to tarnish the one place Severine never thought they could. Everything was up for grabs now. Was she next? “Well, I’m a compulsive liar. You should never listen to me.”
Lily rolled her eyes but grinned at the same time. “If you really wanna know, I-”
“I don’t,” Severine chimed in dryly.
“Watching you guys is kind of...” Lily appeared out of words.
“Hellish, wrong. Something a friend shouldn’t do?” Severine provided.
They parked near their dorm. The engine shut off, and Lily finally looked at Severine. “It’s fun to watch.”
“Lily! My pain is fun to watch?”
“I can’t help it!” Lily said delightfully. “I like that he dares you with practically everything.”
Of course Lily could like that he dared Severine; she wasn’t the one being challenged.
“People that are too much alike? Yeah, they usually blow up around each other,” Severine finally admitted. They were the same. Severine was sure he knew the truth too.
“Where did you and Macsen flounce off to?” She moved her eyebrows up and down.
Severine was beginning to loosen up over the change of subject. “We just talked in some corner.”
“Sounds so romantic.” Lily fluttered her eyes repeatedly. Severine whacked her shoulder and opened her door.
“It was better than sitting at the table of torture.”
Lily slammed her door and hopped up onto the sidewalk. “If you call that torture, then I’m game.”
Chapter Six
Every day had a theme song, each one different from the last. Lily swore upon it. Most times, Severine thought it was crap, but today she was starting to think that her friend might be right.
Sometimes, the shit that came out of Lily’s mouth made sense. Severine trudged up the stairs humming, “Bad Day.” Although, her day was far past bad; it sucked.
“Annneeee,” Severine dragged out. She was too lazy to even talk right.
“Yes?”
“You look like you could be a really fast typist...” Severine trailed off and wiggled her eyebrows.
“I’m not typing your paper.”
“I’ll pay you a thousand dollars,” Severine said as she dug for her keys.
Anne smiled and walked over to Severine. “Bad day?”
“Yeah. I have decided that I truly am going to drop out and become one of those crazy coupon ladies. I could make a killing off that.”
“But you’d also be the world’s most organized hoarder...”
“Thanks for the encouragement. I saw a three-legged cat outdoors, maybe you can steal its cat food later.”
Anne barely smirked at Severine’s barb. “Change. We’re going to the gym.”
“Why would I start going now? I don’t even know where the campus gym is located.”
“Get rid of some steam.” Anne made herself at home and dug through Severine’s closet. “I’m not saying that you have to run five miles, but I promise you’ll feel so much better.”
“I’m not going.” With that statement, Severine dropped onto her bed, and rolled into a comfortable position.
“Yes.” Anne stood up and threw a pair of workout clothes at Severine. “You are. How many times have I gone to some lame-ass party with you?”
Severine lifted her head to lazily look at Anne. She had a point.
Anne knew she was close to talking Severine into it and quickly went in for the kill. “Besides, there is a crap-load of tasteful dudes to stare at.”
Her eyes busted wide. Anne smiled. Severine wasn’t thinking about any tasteful dudes, except Thayer. There was a slight chance he’d be there.
Last night materialized back into her mind. It had driven her nuts all day and was somehow making another appearance. Severine wasn’t going to pretend she didn’t want to see him. She did. That’s what disgusted her.
“It’s our personal Hunk du Jour,” Anne offered with an artful smile.
* * * * *
Sweat dripped down her neck. Severine wiped the perspiration away and focused on the dummy in front of her. All her frustration went into the next kick. Her legs backed away, and she repeated the process.
Anne was right. This was a great way to blow off steam. Before she had started harassing the blameless dummy, she was liable to snap on an innocent bystander. And so far, she hadn’t seen Thayer. She lifted her leg and kicked as hard as she could.
“Uhh, you okay there? I think Bill’s head is ready to fall off.” Anne looked at the dummy they had lovingly named Bill.
Severine took a deep breath and stepped away. Her legs burned, and her muscles felt like jelly. “Your turn.”
Anne gave the dummy a skeptical look. “Uh, I don’t think there’s much left for me kick.”
“Okay, well let’s use the treadmill next.”
“We’ve already done that,” Anne pointed out, as she silently offered Severine a bottled water.“Besides, we’ve been here for almost two hours. I think I’m gonna have to use a wheelchair tomorrow to get to class. Can we please go back to the dorms? Please?”
Severine wasn’t in control of her feelings. Her breath came out in pants, and she concentrated on poor Bill in front of her. She didn’t want to talk about it, but what other choice did she have?
“I think I like someone I shouldn’t.”
It was hard to shock or surprise Anne. She spun the cap of her bottle quickly and practically ran to Severine’s side. “Who? Details!”
“Macsen Sloan,” Severine stated quietly. It was a lie. She meant the other Sloan brother
. Thayer.
Anne looked at her, confused. “Mac? You like Mac?” She rested her hands on her hips and peered at the people around them before glancing back at Severine. “That’s a good thing, right?”
Severine nodded before going back to kicking the dummy repeatedly.
“Then why shouldn’t you like him? Macsen’s not off-limits. He’s a great guy.”
“I know that,” wheezed out Severine. Her heart wasn’t pounding from the exertion that was pouring out of her body. It came from an internal struggle. The truth was hard to keep in when it was begging to be set free.
“You should go for it,” Anne winked.
There was nothing else to do but nod. Severine knew he was the safer route. He made her laugh. Being around Macsen gave her a calmness that normally never stuck. It made sense. For once, Severine needed to follow her logic and gut.
“I can’t take it,” Anne declared with fatigue shading her words. “I’m going to walk to the locker room, while I still can.”
A short burst of laughter escaped Severine. “Go. I’ll be there soon.” She picked up her water and took a long gulp.
“I feel like I’m gonna see you on Cops in a few years.”
At the sound of the voice, Severine bit into the plastic rim of the bottle. Thayer was behind her, watching her with a mixture of respect and interest. This wasn’t Severine’s top place to hang out. Ever.
For him, it evidently was.
Severine pulled the bottle away from her lips. Thayer followed the motion almost eagerly. This wasn’t good for the stress that Severine had just chased out of her body. “It’s my self-defense practice. You know, from all the douchebags out there.”
Thayer grinned. It didn’t crook on one side. There was nothing half-hearted with him. When he smiled, it was all consuming. “Well, I’m a guy, and I’ll officially be standing two feet away from you.”
Severine panted out a laugh, still trying to get the remainder of her breath back. With him here, it officially became ten times harder. He leaned against the wall, dressed in a cut off and basketball shorts. One thing could be checked off her giant list of never-ending questions. He looked just as she imagined after working out.
