Room for Recovery

by D. J. Jamison

  “No, your problem is that you’re a little bitch who hides behind real men.”

  They still respected Wade, even now. Even though he’d shielded Beau and told them to back off. They assumed Beau was gay without proof, but it never crossed their minds that Wade might not be straight. Was it simply a matter of how narrow his shoulders were, how delicate his facial features?

  Beau’s fear transformed into anger. He spun, breaking Billy’s hold on his arm. “I’m more of a man than either of you,” he spat. “You’re cowards, ganging up on me. Why the fuck do you care about me so much? Get a fucking life!”

  His breath clouded the air in front of him, his chest heaved, and Beau realized with a faint sense of horror how much worse he’d just made things as Billy’s face went from cruel to enraged. His features twisted, his mouth an ugly slash that bared his teeth.

  He saw Billy pulled back his arm. He saw the fist headed for his face. He brought up his instrument case, but he was too slow and too off-balance as Jeremy shoved him from behind. Billy’s fist crashed into his cheekbone.

  He felt the force of it as his head snapped to the side and he staggered. He knew it was supposed to hurt, and it did, in a far-off, distant sort of way. His heart beat too hard in his chest, his blood roared in his ears, and adrenaline numbed Beau to the pain.

  He didn’t drop his saxophone case this time. He swung it at Billy, clipping his shoulder. Billy cursed, and Beau’s knee buckled, sending him to the ground. He didn’t realize until he was there that Jeremy had kicked the back of his knee.

  Billy lifted his foot, and the bottom of his boot filled Beau’s vision. Red burst behind his eye as Billy kicked him in the face. Beau attempted to curl up as punches and kicks rained on him like a terrible, unending storm.

  But it did end.

  Voices shouted, a few more hits battered at him, and then they were gone. Nate looked down at him, his face grim.

  “Jesus, are you okay? Ker sent me out to look for you. Fuck, I think you need a doctor.”

  Nate got an arm under him and helped him stand on shaky legs. Now that his adrenaline was falling, shock set in. He shivered uncontrollably, still half-unaware of his surroundings, as Nate called out to someone nearby and another set of hands helped support his weight. His whole head throbbed, especially his eye and upper cheekbone. His side felt tender, probably bruised. He didn’t feel as if anything were broken.

  “He’s bleeding,” a scared voice said as they crossed from the field to the school entrance. He recognized it as belonging to Ker.

  “I’m okay,” he said, hoping it was true. His voice trembled, hardly more than a whisper. He felt dizzy and sick to his stomach. “Need to sit down,” he mumbled.

  “Just a few more steps,” Nate said. “Miles, grab the door.”

  “I’m going to kill them,” Ker said forcefully behind Beau as she followed them into the building. “Then I’m going to kill Wade Ritter.”

  Even in his pained, fuzzy state, he noticed Nate’s small smile. He wanted to defend Wade. It was never his job to keep Jeremy and Billy away; he’d volunteered to help Beau. And besides, he was out of town. He couldn’t be there every second to protect him like some kind of bodyguard.

  They made it to the nurse’s office, though Beau felt as if he’d time-traveled, not registering most of the walk down the hall. When the nurse saw him, there was much exclaiming. Beau was eased down onto a small cot, and he rested his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. He wanted to lay down, but he was afraid the pain in his side would be worse, so he concentrated on bringing his nauseated stomach under control as the nurse asked him a dozen questions.

  Are you dizzy? On a scale of 1 to 10, how bad is your pain?

  She made him open his eyes, while she shined a small penlight at his pupils, then set about washing his face. His nose had bled at some point, and it crusted his nostrils and dried around his mouth and down his neck.

  “Let’s call your parents. You’ll need to see a doctor.”

  “My uncle’s a nurse.” She pursed her lips as he fumbled for his phone and held it out. “Xavier. He’s in the contacts.”

  “I really should call your mother.”

  “I’m eighteen,” he gasped past the pain. “Please.”

  “Very well,” she said. “But head trauma is nothing to take lightly. I’m sure he’ll agree.”

  Beau drifted in a haze of pain, time moving too slowly, as he waited for Xavier to arrive. He’d caught only snippets of the nurse’s conversation with him. Ker sat beside him, holding his hand and ranting in rage.

  “Someone should call the police,” she told the nurse. “This is assault and battery!”

  “I’ve informed the principal,” the nurse, a woman named Naomi with dirty-blond hair cut in a bob, assured her. “Mr. Price will handle any disciplinary actions necessary.”

  “Oh, they’re necessary!” Ker fumed. “Jeremy and Billy have been harassing Beau all semester. They’re bullies. Homophobic assholes!”

  “Ker,” Beau said in exasperation.

  She turned eyes glassy with tears on him. “Are you seriously worried about the school nurse knowing you’re gay, Beau? Hasn’t the worst already happened? No amount of denying it will stop assholes like Jeremy and Billy!”

  “KerryAnn, I’m going to have to ask you to calm down,” Nurse Naomi said. “Please don’t use profanity.”

  “Look at him, though!”

  The nurse drew Ker away, talking to her in a quiet voice. Ker broke into tears, gesturing wildly, frustration and fear evident in her face. Nate still sat by him, though Miles had left once he was situated. Their friendship had cooled significantly since their awkward not-a-date.

  “Go to her,” Beau said.

  Nate startled, tearing his gaze from Ker. He shook his head. “Nah. You need me here.”

  “I’ll be fine. Go comfort your girlfriend.”

  “I don’t know … leaving my best friend battered and bleeding seems wrong.”

  The nurse returned, saving Beau from the exasperation of convincing Nate. “Please join your friend and go on home. Beau’s family should be here shortly. He’s safe in my care.”

  Nate gave Beau one last, uncertain look. He patted Beau’s knee. “Take care. We’ll check in with you later, okay?”

  Then he was gone.

  Sometime after, Xavier arrived. And to Beau’s disappointment, he insisted Beau see a doctor. To his relief, Xavier agreed to take him to the health clinic rather than the emergency room.

  “I’ll take you to the clinic, but only because the full-time doctor there used to work in the ER and he’ll know if you need more treatment,” Xavier said. “And if you do, I won’t be able to put off calling your mother.”

  “It’s just a few punches.”

  “It’s taken less than that to kill a person, Beau. Head trauma is no joke.”

  “You sound like the school nurse.”

  “Good, she’s right,” Xavier said grimly.

  He was taken straight to an examination room, where the nurse on duty greeted Xavier warmly, tsked over Beau’s state and provided him a gown and the assurance that Dr. Johnston would be in shortly.

  When the doctor entered, Beau was floating in a haze. Xavier hadn’t pressed him for information yet, and he was grateful, but he knew the reprieve would end eventually. Before he left, the principal had come by the nurse’s office, and he’d had to explain who jumped him and why. The principal hadn’t been happy he hadn’t reported the bullying, but he’d seemed intent on following up on what happened, so he was confident Jeremy and Billy would be questioned about it. He worried it might only make it worse, though, if Jeremy and Billy were punished. They might want to hurt him again, maybe worse, for getting them called out.

  “Hello, Beau. I’m Dr. Johnston.” The doctor had a soothing voice, confidence imbued in each word. “We’re going to take good care of you. First, we’ll go through a series of questions, so I can evaluate how you’re feeling. Then I’m
going to do an examination to determine if X-rays are necessary. We want to make sure nothing surprises us later.”

  Beau nodded, a headache thudding behind his eyes. The doctor seemed to sense his pain. “First question: Rate your pain on a scale of one to ten?”

  “Um … six?” Beau guessed. It wasn’t like he knew what a ten should feel like. But in terms of what was bearable, he supposed he was in the middle somewhere.

  The doctor nodded. “Headache?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Not surprised. We’ll get you some strong Tylenol.”

  Dr. Johnston shone a light in his eyes, asking some basic questions and evaluating his responses. Then he made Beau take deep breaths while listening to his chest and back with a stethoscope. Beau’s ribs were bruised from the kicks Jeremy and Billy aimed his way. “There’s not a lot to be done for broken ribs,” Dr. Johnston said, “other than to wrap them. But we do want to make sure you don’t have a punctured lung.” He straightened, pulling the stethoscope from his ears. “Your breathing sounds good, though. Your lungs are clear. Let me just have a word with your uncle, and then we’ll get you out of here.”

  Dr. Johnston drew Xavier into the hallway where they talked quietly. After a few minutes, Xavier re-entered the room. “Okay, the doc says that based on your pupil response and lucidity, you probably don’t have a concussion. But we’re going to keep a close eye on you. If you have any lapses of memory or undue lethargy or pain, you’re going straight to the ER.”

  “Okay, yeah,” Beau agreed, just wanting to get home and hole up in his bedroom. “Whatever. I’m fine.”

  “You’re not fine. You look awful,” Xavier said. “The only thing keeping me from freaking the fuck out is the fact that my old roommate, Zane, was beaten to a pulp, way worse than this, and he came out of it okay in the end.”

  Beau hadn’t heard that story before. “What happened to him?”

  “His stepfather beat the crap out of him for being gay,” Xavier said.

  Beau clammed up. Xavier seemed to suspect what motivated Beau’s beating, but he hadn’t come out to his family and Xavier didn’t push him to admit it.

  Dr. Johnston returned with a prescription for extra-strength Tylenol before they left.

  “I told him about Zane,” Xavier said.

  Dr. Johnston grimaced. “It still hurts my heart when I think about it,” he said. Turning back to Beau, he added, “The hardest part of an assault is sometimes the emotional recovery. Having violence turned on you, whether by a stranger or a loved one, can be shocking and scary. Please make sure you talk about your feelings, and that you get counseling if necessary.”

  Beau agreed, eager to get home. But he was curious. “So, you knew Zane too.”

  Dr. Johnston hesitated, glancing at Xavier, who nodded for him to continue. He smiled.

  “Zane is my boyfriend,” he said, then chuckled. “Boyfriend sounds inadequate for the man who has changed my life, but …” he shrugged. “Until I get the guts to propose, boyfriend is the only term I have.”

  Xavier gaped. “You’re going to propose?”

  Dr. Johnston laughed, his cheeks going pink. “Someday.” He pointed at Xavier. “Don’t you say anything.”

  Xavier grinned and used a finger to draw an X over his chest. “I won’t say a word. Cross my heart.”

  ***

  When Beau got home, Gran tucked him into bed, brought him hot chocolate and fussed over him like she hadn’t since he’d been a small child. But he couldn’t put off the truth for long. His mother arrived just after five, and she and Xavier teamed up to question him about what happened.

  “It was just a stupid fight,” he insisted.

  “Beau, the nurse told me they were bullying you for being gay,” Xavier said.

  Beau’s mother looked taken aback. “Is that true, Beau?”

  He turned his head to the wall. “Yeah.”

  “Why wouldn’t you tell us?” she asked. “Surely, you knew we’d accept it. Xavier has been out for years.”

  “Why does it matter then?” Beau challenged. “You’re not upset Maggie hasn’t told you she’s straight, are you?”

  “Are you really going to start a philosophical debate right now?” she asked, agitated. “I just want to know what’s going on with my son!”

  A headache throbbed, making not just his brain hurt but much of his face. Beau closed his eyes. “Can we talk later? Please?”

  Xavier murmured something too quiet for Beau to hear, then spoke louder. “I’m calling an officer to take a report of assault. You can rest until he gets here.”

  Beau’s eyes snapped open. “What? No, I don’t want to file a report—”

  “These guys jumped you because you’re gay,” Xavier said. “Right?”

  “I guess.”

  “Then it’s a hate crime, Beau. That’s serious shit. Do you want them to hurt someone else worse in the future?”

  “No.”

  “You’ll file the report,” his mom said, moving to his side and sitting on the bed. She smoothed his hair back from his forehead. “I know you’re hurting, baby. I’m sorry we have to make you do this, but it needs to be done.”

  At his mother’s comforting tone, Beau nearly lost it. It was so rare that Twyla James babied her kids. It’d been years since he’d heard that tone.

  He took a deep breath, holding onto his composure with effort. “I know. You guys are right.”

  “We’ll let you rest for now,” Xavier said.

  His mother kissed his forehead, and they both withdrew from the room. Beau closed his eyes, but he couldn’t sleep. Even with the Tylenol, he hurt inside and out. But he managed to drift in a half-conscious haze until the officer arrived.

  Officer Tyler Bolt asked a series of questions with an impassive expression. Talking to the officer was both harder and easier than he expected. The officer asked only for facts, but Beau couldn’t avoid reliving the experience as he answered the questions. Thankfully, it went more quickly than he’d expected.

  Once that was over, Beau spent the next couple of hours trying not to think. He wanted to talk to Wade, but that was over, and he didn’t want to rehash what happened with Ker and Nate, so he picked up his phone and texted Dr. Rollins.

  Beau: Have you heard anything more about Amos Jacobs’ condition? This is Beau James, the guy from ICU by the way.

  He didn’t expect an answer immediately, but his phone buzzed in his hand.

  Dr. Rollins: I’ll check and get back to you

  Chapter 19

  Wade was pouting in the guest room where he would be sleeping, earbuds in, when his mother knocked on the door. He was tempted to ignore her.

  He’d come on this trip with the best of intentions. His mom deserved a nice guy, someone to love her. He got that. Supported the idea, in theory.

  From the moment they arrived, she’d been smiling and laughing. She was gaga over this guy, and this guy didn’t live in Ashe. Wade’s insides twisted at the idea of leaving Ashe now, when he was just beginning to find himself again. It wasn’t about leaving Beau, he told himself. It was about leaving Trent and the entire James family — the support system that had gotten them through their darkest days. He didn’t understand how his mother could just walk away from all that.

  So, in typical Wade fashion, he’d been an asshole at dinner. Ray had offered to take him and Katy shopping, and Wade had accused him of trying to bribe them. He didn’t think he was wrong. Ray obviously wanted their approval. But he supposed he could have tried to view it in a more positive light. Ray cared about his mom, and he wanted her kids to be happy too. But Wade wasn’t great at seeing the lighter side of life.

  His mother knocked again, this time opening the door before he answered.

  He yanked out an earbud. “What?”

  Her expression pulled him up short before he could lecture her about the irrelevance of knocking if she was going to barge in anyway.

  “What is it?” he asked, sitting up on his bed as
his heart sped.

  “I just got a call from Trent,” she said. “I thought you might want to know …”

  “Is it Gran?” he asked, thinking how devastated Beau would be to lose his grandmother. She was such a tough lady it was difficult to imagine her suddenly being gone.

  His mother shook her head. “No, it’s Beau.”

  He knew in an instant that Jeremy and Billy had finally gone too far. He jumped from the bed, his fists curling. “How bad is it?”

  If she was surprised by his reaction, she didn’t show it. “Trent said he was jumped by two boys and they did a number on him.”

  “Fuck!”

  “He’s okay,” she assured him. “They checked him out, and he’s mostly just bruised up.”

  “It’s my fault,” he choked out, lifting his hands to rake through his hair in agitation. If he hadn’t stopped sticking by Beau’s side, those guys never would have approached him. They must have noticed Wade keeping his distance.

  “No, it’s not.” She pulled him into a hug. “You always blame yourself, Wade. But you weren’t there. You didn’t hit him. It’s not your fault.”

  “I knew they were hassling him, but I thought I got them to back off.”

  She pulled back and frowned. “He was being bullied?”

  “Kinda. I started driving him to school, and I told them to cool it. He said they weren’t bothering him anymore.”

  “Oh honey, you two really should have told someone,” she said, a mild scold in her voice. She rubbed his arm. “Trent said Beau filed a police report, so the authorities will handle it now.”

  “I really thought they’d stopped.”

  “Well, they’ll stop now,” she said grimly. “They’ll probably be charged with assault, possibly even a hate crime. Beau told Twyla they jumped him for being gay. Did you know?”

  Wade nodded his head. “Yeah.”

  She pursed her lips. “It’s a shame people are so intolerant. Everyone should be free to be themselves and to love who they love.”

  “You really believe that?” he asked tentatively.