Saving Anna

by Sharon Struth

  “Oh, my…” Her mother’s voice cracked.

  Anna drew in a breath and continued. “My lawyer suggested leaving town when the papers were served. This trip to Germany, to take care of something for my neighbor, came at the right time. The papers were served to him two days after I left.”

  “Why wouldn’t you tell us about this, Anna?” her mother asked, sadness evident in her voice.

  “I always knew something wasn’t right with him,” her father growled. “Yes, why on earth didn’t you tell us?”

  “Because Patrick needed help. He was a victim of circumstance and I couldn’t shame him by telling you. Isn’t that what you always taught me?”

  “Well, yes,” replied her mother. “But not at the expense of your own safety.”

  “Mom, really? When you and Dad brought Tommy into our house, you told me to give him a chance even after he tried to hurt me. Remember? You said he’d been a victim of having bad parents.”

  Her father’s voice sounded solemn. “Sweetheart, Tommy’s father sexually abused him, and his mother’s drinking problem left the kid with no support. A deck stacked against a pretty good kid, given the right guidance. We wanted to help him get in with an aunt from another state, not add another mark on his record.” He sighed. “But we never wanted him to hurt you.”

  “I realize that. And yet, he did.” Her parents showed such concern for Tommy that her candor even now didn’t feel right. “Sorry to be blunt. I understood both back then and now how you wanted to give him a break, so maybe he could have a better life.”

  Dad’s voice suddenly sounded frail. “Oh, Anna. You always try to understand. I’m so sorry we screwed that up. We didn’t want him to succeed at your expense.”

  Anna sat on the edge of the bed, stunned but unwilling to keep her voice buried as she’d done for most of her life. “Well, in a way, he did. He still bothered me, even after I told you. But I didn’t want to see him suffer any more than he had either.”

  “Sweetheart,” said her mother. “We’re so truly sorry. I guess we didn’t really think our actions through. Chet, we made a big mistake.”

  “Yes,” her father mumbled. “We didn’t mean for you to suffer.”

  The regret in their voices sounded sincere. Anna wanted to let go of whatever they’d done. Being with Patrick had shown her why clinging to the past rarely brought good. Even with that logic, a little piece of her couldn’t fully let go. Still, she considered all the times they’d been there for her, and holding on to the one time they hadn’t seemed unfair.

  “Anna, can you forgive us?” her mother said quietly, her voice filled with shame. “You know we love you.”

  “I know, Mom. I’m not mad at you. Just need to sort out my feelings. I love you guys, too.”

  They loved her. Erasing age-old feelings wasn’t easy. Maybe if they’d protected her long ago, she might have possessed the backbone to stand up to Patrick sooner. Maybe not.

  Or was she stronger because of what they’d done?

  Anna wasn’t even sure it mattered. They supported her now.

  For a few minutes, they talked about what she’d been through. She heard relief in their voices as she fully explained about serving the divorce papers.

  “Why did your neighbor send you to Germany?” asked her father.

  She told them about Isaak, their friendship, the inheritance, and his final request.

  “I can’t believe you’re in Europe,” said her mother. “How is it?”

  “Beautiful. Sad at times. Fulfilling Isaak’s wish has been satisfying. And I’ve made some wonderful friends. I like the Germans.” She laughed. “They remind me a little of New Yorkers. They take a no-nonsense approach to life, but are incredibly welcoming, too.”

  She told them about some of the towns she’d visited, the trip to Belgium, as well as the assistance of her guide, Josef.

  “And, Dad? While I’ve been here, I’ve been thinking about your grandfather. You’ve only told me a little about him.”

  “A little is all I know. My dad told me his father came to this country as a baby. Only in his adulthood, after being raised Catholic and not knowing much about their original country, did he learn about what his parents had left behind in Poland to live safely in the US. You know, Uncle Stanley did an ancestry test about six months ago and started to build a family tree. How about I give him a call and see what he’s learned?”

  “I’d love that.”

  “So wait,” said her mother. “If you’re over there, isn’t the time much later?”

  “It’s around one a.m.”

  “Well, my goodness. You should get back to sleep.”

  “I’m glad we talked.”

  Her mother’s voice softened. “And, Anna, we are sorry you felt abandoned by us.”

  “Yes,” her father chimed in. “Sweetheart, it was never our intent. In my line of work, I sometimes lose sight of my personal priorities. We dropped the ball.”

  “It’s okay, you guys. I always knew you loved me.”

  “It wasn’t okay,” her mother said softly. “And we are here for you now.”

  A minute later, she hung up and returned to the bed. Dark silhouettes danced on the walls, lurking like the past. But as she drifted back to sleep, they faded away.

  Chapter 22

  Josef’s mind whirled as he struggled to open his eyes. Images floated in his conscious, some sharp as a knifepoint, others fuzzy and just out of his reach. But there was definitely a cat in his dream about the accident. A fact he’d confirmed while driving to pick up Anna the other day.

  He stumbled out of bed, made a pot of coffee, and sat outside on his patio while the crisp morning air woke him further. As he sipped the rich brew and stared out into a small patch of woods behind his apartment, the dream’s details slowly came into focus.

  The tabby stalking his sleep only materialized for an instant before transforming into Lily. Goosebumps prickled up his arms remembering the moment, her presence real as a ghost. He closed his eyes, straining every ounce of brainpower to claim more details.

  Focus. Focus!

  And just like that, a bag appeared. A white one with writing and…and an image. He took slow breaths, drowned out the sounds of cars on the nearby road, and concentrated on the image. Potato chips? He almost laughed, but the rest of the information flooded his mind, vividly showing the lettering. Bret’s Chèvre & Piment.

  Yes! He’d seen this before. In the car. With Lily. Elated at the discovery, he forced himself to still, search for more. There must be more. With each slow breath, he pictured the chip bag, over and over and over until his body drifted, drifted, drifted…

  “I am starving,” Lily announced.

  “What did you pack?” He glanced from the driver’s seat to the fun-loving woman at his side.

  She unhooked her seatbelt and lustily batted her eyes as she turned to reach into the back seat. “All kinds of decadent treats.”

  He stirred, desiring her again. Those alluring dark eyes. The sexy French accent. The very things drawing him to her at the bar the night before.

  While she searched through a canvas bag, he stole a glimpse of her slender body stretched out before him, the dip in her waist, the roundness of her bottom. Then she swung around and held a bag of chips. “Bein. Goat cheese and hot pepper. My favorite. You will try some?”

  Josef’s eyes flashed open and the moment before impact suddenly appeared, clear as a cloudless sky.

  The chips. They’d nibbled on them for a few minutes, then she’d tossed the bag aside, tucked her leg beneath her bottom, and turned in her seat. “I want to read your palm.”

  Of course. She’d moved with ease, unencumbered by the belt as she’d reached for his hand.

  He squeezed his eyes shut, searched for the flash of the moment…yes! That was when the cat darted in front of the car.
He’d swerved. A blind curve. The grill of an oncoming car. He jerked the vehicle back to their lane. Too far. The car bumped on the grass. He couldn’t steer. A tree jumped out.

  BOOM!

  He shivered, opened his eyes. Yes, the tree in the newspaper article, attached to the front end of Lily’s car.

  He’d avoided one head-on collision but steered them into another. If Lily had had her seatbelt back on, though, the outcome might have been totally different.

  The weight of blame for over-steering remained on his shoulders, but if only she’d re-buckled the seatbelt… A near-constant pressure in his head lifted. Day after day, trying to remember what had happened. His heart still ached for Lily’s loss. Maybe he should’ve reminded her about the seatbelt, but he hadn’t.

  Sinbad stepped onto Josef’s patio and mewed a greeting. Josef swooped up the cat, placed him on his lap, and scratched his neck. Sinbad purred. Mrs. Freudenberger was either going out of her mind looking for the pet, or the cat had slipped out and she hadn’t realized it yet.

  “You know, I dreamt about a cat.”

  Sinbad looked up at Josef and mewed.

  He laughed. Years ago he’d read that dreaming about cats meant you were reflecting delusions you had about yourself. Delusions that gave you a false sense of control. That something you believed deep down wasn’t true.

  Perhaps it was true. This crash had forced him to question everything he knew about himself.

  The old Josef was a delusion, a boy mimicking his father. Believing that being bold, brave, and noncommittal to others gave him some control over his life.

  The accident crushed the man he used to be, changed his life. These months had been occupied with a rebuilding of himself from the ground up. Physically and mentally. If he hadn’t been hurt, he wouldn’t have been driving Anna around. Without Anna, he wouldn’t have taken Isaak’s journey. Steps that made him gain focus on his own problems.

  These past weeks were a gift. How lucky he’d been to spend them with her. Because of her mission, he woke each day a changed man. He’d seen things in his country through new eyes.

  When she left, he would miss her. And even though she’d leave, he had no regrets about getting too close to someone so special. Memories of their journey together could never be stolen from him.

  * * * *

  “Josef asked if we would drive you to his brother’s Polterabend.” A breeze ruffled Regina’s short blond hair, and then it fell back in place as quickly as it lifted.

  Anna stopped to peek in the gift shop window in downtown Mainz, thinking about buying some chocolates to give to her parents. “His what?”

  Regina laughed. “Pol-ter-ah-bend. A German wedding tradition. He told me he invited you.”

  “He mentioned a gathering the night before the wedding. I asked if it was similar to our custom of a rehearsal dinner, and he said yes.”

  “I see. He did not share the details, eh?” Regina grinned.

  This shopping trip for a dress she could wear to the wedding was the first time Anna had seen Regina take a break from her work at the guesthouse. She and Joachim worked very hard.

  “No.” They continued to walk through the modern shopping area, quite different than the old city located a few blocks over. She glanced at Regina. “So what is this Polterabend all about?”

  “Guests must break porcelain at the affair as a sign of good luck to the newlywed couple.”

  “You get to break things?” She laughed. “Doesn’t sound like any custom we have in the US.”

  “It is a fun and casual night.” Regina motioned ahead to a large department store. “Here is where will we shop. Peek & Cloppensburg.”

  Anna slowed at one of the display windows, her gaze resting on a beautiful pair of royal blue pumps with a slender heel. “Maybe I can find a dress to match those shoes.”

  A reflection in the store window of the brick courtyard behind her made her still. A man watched her. He wore a cap, and his jacket collar hid part of his face. But those eyebrows. Dark, distinctive. Like Patrick’s. Her heart raced. Before she could turn around to look, Regina touched her arm.

  “Let us go in.” She pulled open the glass door.

  Anna followed, but before entering, she spun around. The man was gone. She shook her head. Patrick would be thrilled to know he caused all this paranoia.

  She forced a smile at Regina and headed inside.

  For over an hour they shopped in the modern, well-stocked department store. Anna found a beautiful blue-patterned dress that hugged her curves, dipped into a V-neck, and had trumpeted sleeves. A perfect match for the shoes she wanted to buy. She even purchased a pair of black suede boots, if for no other reason than she loved them.

  Afterward they stopped for coffee and cake at a little café, and, once done, went the tram stop.

  As they waited on a bench for their ride, Regina said, “I think Josef has grown very fond of you.”

  “I’ve grown fond of him, too.”

  “We have known Josef and his family for a long time. Around you, he is the most relaxed we have ever seen him.” Regina raised her pale brows. “So? Has he charmed you the way he does the rest of us?”

  Knowing others saw in them what Anna felt confirmed so many of her feelings. “Yes, he has.”

  Regina’s broad smile reached her rich blue eyes. “Sehr gut. That makes me happy.” A tram approached and she stood. “This is ours.”

  Once boarded on the crowded car, Anna got separated from Regina and stood further down holding onto a metal bar. As the tram pulled away, she stared blindly at the busy sidewalk, thick with pedestrians. Her gaze brushed past a man. She backtracked. Same dark brows, cap hiding his hair, and flipped up collar hiding the lower half of his face. She squinted. Could it be—

  Someone tapped her arm. As she glanced down, a man in a suit rose from his seat and motioned to it. “Bitte?”

  “Danke.” She smiled and took the seat, quickly craning her neck to see outside the window. The Patrick look-alike had vanished again.

  She had to be losing her mind. Surely he wouldn’t hop a plane and come all this way. Or was he just that insane?

  * * * *

  Josef hurried up the front walkway of the guesthouse and entered the small reception area. Anna was on her way down the stairs dressed in a suede skirt that wrapped tight around her slender frame, black tights, and black-heeled boots.

  She smiled and hit the last step. “You’re right on time.”

  He slipped an arm around her waist and gave her a kiss. “Because I missed you today. Ready to leave for dinner?”

  “Yup. Where to?”

  “There’s an Italian restaurant not far from my apartment. My friend is the chef there. Then later, we can go back to my place for the night. Is that too presumptuous on my part?”

  “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t want me there.”

  He helped her with her coat and kissed her again. “Gut. Then we are of the same mind.” He winked, took her hand, and they headed outside. “Let’s catch the tram.”

  As they crossed the street, he said, “I have news. I had a breakthrough in my memory this morning.” He shared with her the dream, the cat, and how it led to his realization about Lily’s seatbelt. “It doesn’t change the sadness I feel over her death, but some of the blame I carried has gone.”

  She stopped and drew him into a hug, whispered in his ear, “That is fantastic news, Josef.”

  He talked more about the return of his memory, and he couldn’t remember when he’d felt so good. As they approached the tram stop, their ride neared and they boarded. The minute they got seated, Anna turned to look out the window. Her brows furrowed as she squinted at the pedestrian-filled streets.

  “Looking for something?”

  She turned around. “I’m probably being neurotic, but twice today, while Regina a
nd I shopped, I saw a face in a crowd that I swear was Patrick’s.”

  “So you think he might here?”

  “He flew to Texas, to my sister’s. Germany might not be out of the question.”

  “But the lawyer believed his assistant didn’t provide Patrick with the details, right?

  “Yes. But he wasn’t certain.”

  Josef worried. What if Patrick was a persuasive man, who’d manipulated or lied to get her actual location?

  “I called Patrick’s office when I got back from shopping today. He didn’t answer, but his voice mail didn’t say he was away.”

  “So that should reassure you.”

  She shrugged. “I suppose. I’m probably being paranoid.”

  He placed a hand over hers. “No, you aren’t. As long as I am by your side, I will not let that man lay a finger on you.”

  “Thank you.” She smiled, a half-hearted one. “So we’re eating Italian food in Germany, huh?”

  He chuckled. “Do you think we only eat weiner schnitzel and drink beer?”

  “Yup. And wear lederhosen, too.” Her mouth curved into a simple smile, and she watched him with a dash of merriment in her eyes.

  “Ah, I guess you will think it is corny if I wear my lederhosen to the wedding then.”

  The smiled vanished. “Oh, I’m sorry. Were you going to—”

  He laughed and she narrowed her eyes, quickly followed by a smile. “Okay, wise guy. You got me.”

  He enjoyed seeing her relaxed, but it lasted only seconds. She turned and stared out the window, her smile vanishing as her worried gaze combed the city streets.

  Chapter 23

  “Anna’s reason for coming to Germany is a remarkable story.” Joachim stepped to the side and encouraged Anna into his group of friends as he addressed them. “Do you remember a man named Isaak who I met in America when we visited Regina’s brother?”