by S Doyle
“Fitz! Shit. Is she okay?” Chas came bolting up the steps.
“She’s fine. Just a little drunk and tired. I’m taking her home.”
“Sorry, man. I didn’t even know she was here,” he told me. Then to the rest of the crowd. “You all know I have a strict policy. Juniors and seniors only. If I find anyone younger here, I’m tossing everyone out.”
I carried her down the stairs and out of the house, knowing Beth was following us. We reached my car and Beth opened the back door so I could set Gi down where she promptly laid out on the seat.
Getting in the driver’s side, I glanced over at Beth, who was shutting the passenger door and reaching for her seat belt.
“I didn’t open your door,” I muttered.
“And I’ll never forgive you for it,” she said rolling her eyes.
“I’ll have to drop you home first.”
“Of course.”
I didn’t say anything else after that. Just turned over the ignition and drove. My emotions rolling out of control. Anger for Wick, frustration and guilt with Gigi, regret with Beth. This wasn’t how any of this was supposed to go tonight.
Fifteen minutes later, I was pulling up in front of her house. Hours earlier than I wanted. I couldn’t even kiss her goodnight. The sound of my sister snoring in the backseat was not conducive to any sort of romance. It made me want to punch Wick all over again.
“I’m sorry about tonight,” I offered lamely. “None of that was fun.”
“Some of it was fun. The kissing part,” she whispered.
I attempted a smile. “Yeah.”
“You know none of this was your fault.”
It felt like it. It felt like it was all my fault. I never should have gone along with Gi’s plan to get closer to Wick. I knew what he was. I was being naïve to think something bad couldn’t happen.
Beth reached out and grabbed my forearm, still resting on the steering wheel and squeezed.
“You can’t control everything all of the time.”
“Can’t I?” I huffed. “That’s funny because I thought I could control Gi and Wick. And you.”
“Me?”
I looked in the rearview mirror to assure myself Gi was still asleep. Then I turned to Beth and took her chin in between my thumb and finger so she couldn’t look away.
“I confess I want to control you in all things. Is that wrong?”
She let out a breath of air but said nothing for several beats of her heart. I let her go and she undid her seat belt. I didn’t hesitate, but instead popped out and bolted around the front of the car in time to open it.
Or maybe she let me think I was in time. I took her hand and helped her out of the car.
“This night didn’t end the way I wanted it to, Beth, but know this isn’t over. We’re not over.”
“No,” she said on a deep sigh. “I imagine we’re just beginning.”
I pulled up into my driveway and parked in my normal spot. Our parents were out at some charity function so Gi would be spared their reactions—or overreactions. I hadn’t made up my mind if I would tell them or not.
Our parents weren’t exactly traditional. They wouldn’t do something as cliché as ground Gigi.
However, they would talk to her about why she wanted to try Ecstasy or drink. They would remind her how vulnerable she was in so many ways. Because of who she was, but also because she was a girl.
They might even go so far as to sign her up for defense training. Our mom had talked about it with her over the summer, but Gigi hadn’t been interested. That might change. Because tomorrow she was going to wake up with a hangover, but more than that, a realization of how precarious her situation had been.
It’s likely she wouldn’t need my parents to remind her of that.
I opened the back door and saw her illuminated by the overhead light of the car, curled into a ball, her cheek resting on her hands. She looked so young, so damn innocent. It had been a harmless drug tonight but what about the next time?
And what sick bastard would be willing to bet money on when she was going to lose all that?
I tugged on her ankle. “Gigi, wake up. We’re home.”
She groaned and pulled her legs up higher into her stomach.
“If you don’t get up, I’m going to leave you out here and let you explain to Mom and Dad why you fell asleep in the car.”
She couldn’t have been sleeping too hard because the threat made her stir. “I’m uuuuupppp.”
I helped her to her feet—she was a little unsteady—but she batted my hand away when I offered to carry her again. I followed her into the house and upstairs to her room, waiting for her while she tucked into the bathroom to change and brush her teeth.
An idea occurred to me, so I crossed the hall to my own room and my private bathroom. In the medicine chest above the sink, I pulled out a bottle of aspirin and shook out two. Gi always kept a glass of water on her nightstand, but I didn’t think she kept something as prosaic as aspirin in her bathroom. Having never had a hangover before, it wouldn’t have occurred to her.
When I stepped back into her room she was already getting into bed. I waited then put the aspirin in her hands and handed her the water.
“Take these. But not until tomorrow morning.”
She obeyed like she frequently listened to my orders, which we both knew was not true.
“How mad are you?” she asked.
“Pretty mad,” I said. “Mostly at myself for agreeing to this. I told you to back off.”
“I know,” she whispered. “But the crazy thing is, I think he actually really liked me. I felt like I should probably give him a legitimate chance. Tonight really wasn’t his fault. You know me. I always want to try everything. At least once. For the experience.”
I shook my head. Another thing instilled into us from our non-traditional parents. They were about growth and exploration. We weren’t being raised as typical teenagers. We were being raised as the successors to a family dynasty.
For us there were no limits. Except for what was expected of publicly.
“Are you going to tell them?”
“Are you?” That was the better question. When you knew you weren’t going to be punished, at least in the obvious sense, it was easier to share your mistakes with your parents.
“Probably. Let me sleep on it. I’m still so damn tired.”
“Okay. But Gi, you have to believe me on this. Wick can’t be trusted.”
“Fine. After tonight he’s probably done with me anyway.”
I said nothing other than to bend down and kiss her on the forehead. I left her room and went back to mine still restless with an excess of adrenaline and emotion. I changed out of my jeans and shirt and slipped on a loose pair of sweats, thinking I might hit up the treadmill in our home gym.
Sitting on my bed I reached for my phone. A few texts from Ed asking about Gi. A text from Heath who must have heard about it from Ed.
A text from Beth.
Beth: Everything okay?
Me: Yes. She’s just sleeping it off.
Beth: Good.
I watched the dots start and stop. Then start and stop again. What was Beth overthinking about? The dots stopped again.
Me: Stop overthinking. Just say whatever you want to say. Or ask me whatever you want to ask me.
Beth: Fucking dots. Whose idea was that anyway?
Me: Beth…
Beth: You know I’m not in your league, right?
Me: My league?
Beth: Don’t be obtuse.
Me: Don’t be predictable.
Beth: ASSHOLE!
I laughed, but then tried to explain what it was about her that made her different for me.
Me: Take away all the high school bullshit. You’re my intellectual equal and that’s all that matters to me.
Beth: Would we say EQUAL if I beat you academically this year?
There she was. That was my girl.
Me: You’re right. When I beat you
this year, you’ll be my inferior. At that point I will no longer have ANY interest in you, other than taking your virginity of course.
Beth: Taking my virginity? What are you a Viking?
I sent her a few badass Viking GIFs.
She parried with some classic rolling eye GIFs.
Me: So we both agree we don’t like parties. Where would you like to go for our legit first date?
Beth: Now he asks me….dunno. Movies?
Me: Cliché.
Beth: Dinner?
Me: Boring.
Beth: Doubles bungee jumping?
Me: Would you do that??????
Beth: No! Well, that’s it. You don’t like my ideas and I’m certain not to like yours. Guess we can’t date.
Me: You’re right. We should probably just stick to fucking. Can you say fucking yet?
Beth: Yes. Watch. Fuck you, you fucking asshole. Simple dimple.
Me: Are you going to dream about me tonight?
Beth: No!
Me: Then I’ll have to do it for the both of us. And since we’ll be in my head I’ll be sure to make it extra dirty.
Beth: Don’t do anything seriously kinky with me in your dirty dreams, Fitz!
Beth: Fitz.
Beth: Fitzzz!!!!!
I smiled and deliberately didn’t answer. Let her wonder what filthy things I could imagine. She was probably blushing now. Tucked away safely in her girly bed.
It made me hard just thinking about it, but I refrained from giving myself any relief. I wanted the ache. The suffering. The teasing. It was going to make finally conquering Beth Bennet that much sweeter.
I was about to plug in my phone on the charger on my nightstand when I got another text. This time from a number, whose name didn’t register on my phone.
Unknown: I have information. Meet me Monday after school behind the bleachers.
I was tempted to ask if this was Locke. Something this cryptic sounded like him, but if I was wrong, I didn’t want to scare the person off by asking too many questions. If it was Locke, then the arranged meeting was perfect timing.
He’d supplied Wick with the bogus Ecstasy, and I wanted to know why.
The game was afoot.
15
Beth
I tossed the phone to the edge of the bed and huffed. He was driving me crazy. First being nice to me. Then sticking up for me. Now he was flirting with me. And kissing me.
The kissing had been unlike any other kiss I’d ever had.
It felt…serious.
Usually, I was so in my head when I kissed a boy. Was I doing it right? Was my tongue in the best position? Was I going to sneeze and shoot boogers out of my nose into his mouth?
Kissing Fitz, there had been no room for thoughts. All I could think about was more and more and more and more and more.
For the first time in my seventeen years, I suddenly understood what want was.
He joked about my virginity, but it didn’t feel like a joke. Instead, it felt like something…like something he was always meant to have from me. Which couldn’t possibly be right because I was sure I’d hated him up until the start of the school year.
“Beth!”
My bedroom door burst open and both Lyd and Kit pushed inside. Mary, too, was there lingering behind them.
“Girls!” I admonished. “You know you’re supposed to knock first!”
What if I’d been naked? Worse what if I’d been touching myself?
Touching myself while thinking about Fitz and his kiss.
Gah!
Had that really been about to happen?
The few times I’d tried, admittedly when I’d been furious with Fitz over something, hadn’t resulted in what I understood from romance novels should have been an explosion of physical pleasure. Instead, it resulted in frustration and embarrassment. Tonight, however, I felt different.
I felt changed.
“What?” I shouted at the girls, Kit and Lyd who were now flopping onto my bed, while Mary lingered by the door.
“Did you hear?” Lyd asked me.
“Another bet’s been won,” Kit said right on top of her. “This payout was two thousand dollars!”
“Two thousand,” I whispered. “Who?”
A payout like that meant the odds of succeeding had been low. I considered the class of freshman girls and who among them would be singled out like that for such high stakes. Either someone who wouldn’t easily be seduced or someone for whom the consequences of her seduction would be high.
Gigi was the first girl who came to mind but since I knew for a fact it wasn’t her… I racked my brain.
“Oh no,” I said, as it came to me.” Not Janet Banks.”
Both girls nodded enthusiastically.
Janet was the mayor’s daughter. A sweet, beautiful, young girl who would have been perceived as untouchable given her father’s position in the town.
“When?”
“Today. Apparently, it happened in the back seat of Tim Markel’s car. Now everyone is talking about it. Her parents already know and called the police because, even though she says it was consensual, she’s still underage. Not sure how much trouble Tim might be in. Worse though, her parents are also threatening to send her to the private all-girls school.”
That was Bishop Eustace. The rumor was they actually still had teaching nuns who used rulers to punish the impure thoughts out of young girls.
Bishop Eustace was a threat that hung over every girl at Haddonfield High. Mom had used it often enough with Kit and Lyd.
“This isn’t right,” Mary said quietly from the doorway. “These girls aren’t ready.”
“Speak for yourself,” Lyd said, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “I’m ready.”
“Lydia Bennet,” I cried out. “Take that back. You most certainly are not ready. You’re fourteen years old!”
She shrugged as if age meant nothing. “Fourteen, fifteen what’s the difference really? Boys aren’t judged by how young they are when it happens, but for girls it’s like we’re still holding on to this hundreds-year-old, antiquated custom of virginity and purity. First, it was all hold onto it so that a man will marry you. Now it’s all about hold on to it until you’re at what society says is the right age, otherwise you’re a slut. Except we’ve all decided that slut shaming is out and owning our sexuality is in. As women our sexuality comes with a built-in physical timeline. From when we get our period to menopause. I say have as much sex as you can in between those years. So when I feel it with the right guy, I’m going for it. I don’t care how old I am.”
There were so many counter arguments, they filled my head too quickly. I couldn’t make a single coherent objection. Instead, I pointed my finger at her like a shrewish spinster, wearing, no doubt, an expression Miss Havisham made when someone talked out of turn in her classroom.
“You are not going to embarrass this family by becoming someone’s two-thousand-dollar payout!”
“As if I would go that high,” Lydia said, rolling her eyes. “Everyone knows I’m dying to lose it. Odds are pretty are high it will happen this year for me. I just haven’t found the one yet. You know what I mean?”
She rolled over on to her back and sighed. “Someone who makes my toes curl.”
Like Fitz.
“Someone I don’t want to stop kissing. Ever.”
Like Fitz.
“Someone who gives me that punch in the gut feeling every time I see him walking down the hall.”
Like Fitz.
I might be in trouble.
Monday Afternoon
Fitz
It was all very cloak and dagger. Behind the bleachers had been a little vague given the size of our football field and stadium. After school was even more so, as I went from class immediately to football practice. However, it was a little after four with practice winding down and everyone headed toward the locker room when I picked up my phone and saw another text from the same number.
At first, I didn’t know what
the hell I was looking at until I realized they were GPS coordinates. Using Google maps, I plugged them in and waited for a red ping to show me the way on the map.
I made my way to the far end of the football field—the visitor’s section of the stadium—and saw the shadowy figure waiting for me underneath the bleacher seats. I could smell the vaping smoke from here and knew I’d been right in my prediction.
It wasn’t a bad meeting spot. This side of the stadium was surrounded by woods. No homes abutted the school here and, from this position, you could see anyone who might be approaching.
We would be both unseen and have the advantage of a warning if anyone got close. I dropped off the bleachers and landed easily. Turning, I took in Locke with his pale English face, dark hair and long dark coat. Sucking on his vaping pen, which should have disgusted me, but there was a way he did that made me think of those old Turkish hookahs. Like there was almost a meditative quality to it.
“Locke,” I acknowledged.
“Darcy,” he said as he blew out a stream of steam. “Thanks for meeting me. I’m sure this must seem fairly ridiculous, but I didn’t want to be seen or overheard. A new fellow doesn’t know who to trust at this school.”
“Well, I’m an old fellow at this school and I don’t know who to trust, either. Especially you. Why are you selling fake E?”
He laughed. “Because it’s hysterical. I’m not in school for two days and people were asking what they could score from me. I found it rather cheeky, so I had a little fun. My pill pushing isn’t your problem.”
“What is my problem?”
Locke looked around. “This betting ring. The girls’ virginity. I don’t think it stops there.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Someone is running an operation. This list isn’t a lark. Or something that someone just did for typical high school humiliation sport. The money that’s changing hands is too much, too smooth. The second I have a lead on the Venmo account, it changes. This doesn’t feel like an amateur game to me.”
I snorted. “How would know what a professional game feels like?”
He lifted a shoulder, took a hit on his pen. “Let’s just say my schooling experience has been significantly more colorful than what most here at Haddonfield Memorial are used to.”
