“I should get inside. I need to grab something to eat before I go back to work.” I turned my head to see those calm blue eyes smiling at me.
“Sure thing. If you want to go out, we’ll go to the same place as last time, if that’s okay. Those fries were great.”
I laughed. “I think it’s the fries you want to spend time with.”
My heart beat faster as he squeezed my hand. “No, Vanessa, it’s you.”
After work, I drove to the bar, Dylan following in his car this time. The booth we’d had the time before was empty, and I sat while Dylan ordered drinks and a bowl of fries.
There was an unread text from Will. He’d had the day off, but had taken the time to send me a message to check up.
How did your session go? Let me know if you want some company.
Dylan sat as I tapped out a response.
It was good. Really tired. Having a bite to eat and then home to sleep.
I took a sip of the drink sitting in front of me. The alcohol brought a warm flush to my cheeks, and I let out a sigh.
“Better?” Dylan asked, clearly amused from the smile on his face.
“Getting there. I think a good sleep will be what really helps.”
My phone buzzed, and I picked it up to take a look.
See you at work tomorrow. Ali says sleep well.
“Good news?” Dylan asked.
“Will checking up on me. He knew I had the appointment with the counsellor today.”
“You two are close.” It was a statement, not a question and I was unable to look away from the intense gaze he had going on.
“He’s a good friend. So’s his girlfriend. We met back when I lost the baby, and they’ve been with me ever since.”
Dylan smiled. “I’m glad you have good friends. Must have been a tough thing to go through.”
“The worst.” I sipped my drink again. “But I’m not discussing that tonight. I’ve done enough talking for today.”
Dylan nodded. “I bet. What else do you want to talk about?”
“We could talk about you. I seem to spend a lot of time on me right now.”
He shrugged. “I’ve told you about me. There’s not much else to say. I’ve spent a lot of time studying, and now I spend a lot of time working. Maybe in a couple of years when my internship is finished and I’ve settled on what I want to specialise in, life might settle down.”
“I know that feeling.”
His hand closed over mine, and I caught my breath at his touch. We seemed similar, and although I knew virtually nothing about him, he made me feel comfortable in his presence.
“I’m glad you came out with me. Even for just one drink.”
This was a bit overwhelming, liking someone so much when I still struggled with the aftermath of what had come before. Not to mention unresolved feelings over how I’d treated Connor. But Dylan didn’t judge me and was content to just sit and say nothing.
Sometimes that was what I needed.
ONE OF JULIA’S suggestions was that I have some time to look after myself. I’d barely stopped since the miscarriage, the exception being that first week after it. Since Connor had left, I’d worked my shifts, sometimes tacking on additional hours. If my relationship with Connor hadn’t already been broken, being away from home so much would have made it suffer.
I had a ton of leave up my sleeve. The week I’d taken off hadn’t made much of a dent. Logging into the leave system, I chewed my lip as I requested the following week off. Julia was right. Some time by myself would do me the world of good. Give me a chance to potter around the house and relax. I had to take care of me.
For my emotional well-being, I could spend some time with Will and Ali, and even invite Dylan over.
I smiled at that last thought. He and I had just clicked, and once I got past that flirty exterior, he was so incredibly easy to speak with. Part of me thought I was pushing too hard to move on still, but things seemed to be going at a pace I could handle.
As I crawled into bed, I hugged Connor’s pillow, even though any last trace of him was long gone.
Time to move on.
Chapter 11
“A whole week? What am I going to do without you for a whole week?” Will held out his palms in despair.
“I’m sure you’ll cope. What did you ever do before we became friends?”
He grinned. Every so often I’d see this goofy expression on his face that brought up memories of someone else I had been trying not to think about. Maybe it was what had drawn me into my friendship with him in the first place, but Will was more than that. He had also become like a brother. Someone to confide in.
“Work is so boring. I mean, all these sick people.”
I shook my head. “You could always go and see if Mr Snow is back in ward nine. He’s always happy to chat.”
“It’s you he likes. I think it’s the prostate exams he enjoys.” Will took a sip of his coffee.
I twisted in my seat, unable to keep still as I watched him. “There’s something else I should tell you.”
He looked up, his right eye twitching a little as he examined me closely. “What is it?”
“I’ve kind of been seeing someone. Well, I’ve seen him a couple of times.”
“Really? You didn’t say anything.”
“I’m telling you now.” I lightened my tone in an attempt to stop him from being so serious. He’d want to ask a million questions to protect me—I already knew that. Then, he’d tell Ali and it’d start again. I couldn’t be angry with them. They had been my sanity somewhat during these past few months.
“Who?” His eyes were so wounded. That I hadn’t confided in him would sting when all he had done was open his heart and his friendship to me.
“Dylan West.”
His eyebrows crept up as he continued to take me in. “Dylan West who works here?”
I nodded.
“Just be careful.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He let out a little sigh. “You can be … impulsive. Don’t rush anything.”
“Thanks, Mum.”
“Do you drive her as nuts as you drive me?”
I laughed. “My mother and I have a very special relationship.”
He smiled and shook his head. “So do I have to ask what you have planned on your time off?”
Leaning back in my seat, I picked up my coffee cup. “Actually, I have very little planned. I just need to get some me time.”
“Roger that. Just give me or Ali a call if you want some company.”
“I will.”
I HADN’T COOKED a proper meal in ages. Lately, I’d lived on noodles and toasted cheese sandwiches, usually on the way to climbing into bed to get sleep.
Mum had given me some lamb when I went to visit, and there was a nice-looking roast that had sat in the freezer since I’d returned. I hadn’t seen the point in cooking it for one, and had meant to invite Will and Ali round for a meal sometime. Now I had a new purpose for it. I’d invited Dylan over for the evening.
I’d taken it out of the freezer to defrost when I’d got home from work on Friday night for cooking on Saturday. This would be amazing once it was done, and maybe for the next week I could be responsible and live off the leftovers instead of wasting them. Adulting was hard.
Covering the lamb in oil and rosemary, I slid it into the waiting oven. This house had seemed so empty, but soon it would be filled with all those yummy cooking smells I missed from home.
This had once been a family house. After Sam left, Ella and Matt had made their life together here for their first couple of years together. Finn had come home from the hospital to this place, and so had Georgia. Maybe one day it would be a family home again.
By five, the house was full of the aroma of lamb and roasting potatoes. I had a pang of homesickness, making a mental note to visit the farm in the next week. What I wouldn’t give to hug Finn and Georgia, losing myself to childhood fun.
A tap on the fr
ont door woke me out of my daydream, and I took a deep breath before calling out. “Who is it?”
“Dylan.”
A shiver ran through me. This nagging part of me kept saying I was moving on too quickly, but how else did you put the past behind you? Dylan was sweet and kind, and he liked me, really liked me.
I pulled open the door. “Come in.”
He stepped inside, taking a good look around as he entered. “Nice place.”
“Thanks.”
“These are for you.” He produced a bunch of wilted carnations from behind his back. “Sorry they’re not better. I stopped at the garage along the way.”
I laughed. “It’s the thought that counts. Take a seat. I’m sure I have a vase around here somewhere.”
He sat on the couch as I took the flowers into the kitchen. There was a vase in one of the cupboards; Ella had given it to me one Christmas. She loved having fresh flowers in the house. The scent usually irritated me.
“Dinner smells good,” Dylan called from the living room.
“My mouth has been watering all afternoon.” There it was, right at the back under the sink. I pulled it out and filled it with water, propping the flowers up in it.
I carried them back out and placed them on the dining room table. “There. Dinner will be ready really shortly. I just have to put the vegetables on to steam.”
“That food smells so good, let’s just skip the vegetables.”
For the first time in ages, I rolled my eyes. “Such a child.”
“I ate more vegetables when I was a child than I do as an adult. True story.” He laughed and licked his lips. His eyes had a mischievous twinkle to them.
I might have been more excited with anticipation if I wasn’t so terrified.
This evening might take forever to get through.
WE SAT at the dining table, our plates filled with lamb, potatoes, and, despite Dylan’s protests, steamed vegetables. Mum had a vegetable garden out the back of the house, and I’d spent my childhood eating food fresh out of that garden, and I’d often thought I should put in a garden of my own, I loved the freshness so much. I’d never got around to it. Although I’d read studies that showed snap-frozen vegetables retained their nutritional goodness, I’d always had my doubts. They just weren’t the same.
“This lamb is amazing. Where did you get it?”
“My parents’ farm. They usually get enough meat butchered for the winter, and sometimes Mum gives me some cuts.”
He smiled. “It’s fantastic. Nicely cooked too. My compliments to the chef.”
Laughing, I lifted another couple of slices from the large platter in the middle of the table onto my plate. “I’m glad I found someone to share it with. I’d be sick of it by the end of the week otherwise.”
“Glad to have helped out, then.” He took another bite. “This is all amazing. Might just have to keep you on as cook.”
“Oh, you think?”
Dylan grinned. “I think we have to stop talking so I can demolish this plate. My stomach is grumbling because I’m not eating fast enough.”
For the second time I rolled my eyes with a grin, but didn’t say a word. My stomach was in competition with his. I hadn’t been so hungry in forever.
After dinner, I dumped the dishes in the dishwasher and flicked it on. Since Will had fixed it, it hadn’t skipped a beat, and I hadn’t had any more meltdowns along with it.
Dylan sat on the couch, and I sat beside him. I was nervous, so nervous. To be sitting so close to him, feeling this attraction between us—I didn’t know if he was my next big love or anything, but his presence unnerved me. He was extremely good-looking.
“Tell me about yourself,” he said.
“You already know most of what there is to know.”
His lips quirked. “I’m not talking about what’s happened the past few months. You mentioned your parents live on a farm?”
I nodded. “Mum and Dad own a farm up near Kerikeri. My sister and her husband have a house on the farm too. They live there with their two kids, and another one on the way.”
“Nice.”
“What about you?”
He licked his lips. “Mum and Dad in Dunedin. Older brother who’s a builder down there. That’s about it.” He paused. “Do you like working at the hospital?”
“It’s not always easy, but I knew that going in. I’m enjoying it. It’s definitely helping me form some ideas on what I want to specialise in.”
He nodded, grinning. “I always thought life after graduation would be kinda like Grey’s Anatomy. You know, find a cute doctor to hook up with, have an inordinate amount of secret sex ...”
The thought made me laugh. Our lives were far from that. Instead, we worked long hours and when I wasn’t working, I was quite often reading medical journals as I continued to learn.
“Then I discovered that it was mostly work and not a lot of play. Lucky sex wasn’t the main reason I became a doctor.”
“So, why did you?”
His face lit up, and his eyes were more animated than I thought I’d seen them so far. “I want to get into paediatrics eventually.”
“Really?”
“I love the idea of helping kids. Especially the ones who don’t get the best start. You can literally hold their life in your hand.” He took a sip of his beer. “Why did you become a doctor?”
I laughed, running my finger around the rim of my wine glass. “I liked the idea of helping people. My dad wanted me to become a vet, and maybe I would have had an even better bedside manner with animals, but human medicine appealed.”
“What was that about bedside manner?” The glint in his eyes was unmistakable. Mr Flirt was back again, and my throat tightened as he set that gaze of his on me.
We were so close to one another already, and he leaned in. The faint scent of beer filled my nostrils, and my heart came near to exploding as he reached for the glass in my hand, the soft clink of it connecting with his beer bottle as he placed them on the coffee table.
There had been very few times in my life when I’d been lost for words. Some snarky comment was never far from my lips. Not tonight. Not when those crystal eyes were fixed on me and I couldn’t look away.
His fingers stroked my cheek, and I licked my lips to moisten them. Our breathing fell into sync, and the moment, already drawn out, seemed to take on a life of its own.
“Vanessa.”
“Yes?” I squeaked, and his lips curled into a smile.
There were no more words as he leaned over, pressing his warm mouth to mine and stealing my breath. I surrendered to him, closing my eyes as the kiss deepened, his hands firm on my shoulders, holding me close.
When we broke apart, my eyes flickered open, taking in the sight of Dylan West. His gaze swept over my face, a look of awe on his.
“I’ve been wanting to do that for a while now.”
I nodded, still unable to form words.
“What are you thinking?”
Licking my lips again, I smiled. “That I liked that very much.”
He didn’t ask for an invitation to do it again. This was no chocolate-chip muffin, but it was gentle and sweet, slowly building to achy and wanting.
It had been so long since I’d kissed someone new, I’d forgotten what it was like to feel different lips pressed against mine, the excitement of his tongue venturing to touch my own. I was a goner with that second kiss, losing myself in the romance of the attentions he paid me.
I didn’t say a word as his hand slid to my breast. We were going from zero to a hundred in about three milliseconds, but I wanted it, wanted him. He listened, and he cared, and he wanted to touch me as much as I longed to be touched. Dylan woke something in me that had been dormant since that night in the emergency room, and this time I wasn’t scared.
He pressed me against the back of the couch, rubbing his thumb across my nipple. It hardened in response, and I gasped as he bent his head, nuzzling my chest.
This was so fast, but s
eemed so right.
“I wanted you from the first day,” he murmured.
“I’m not ready for anything serious.” I had to say it, just in case he thought this meant we were engaged or something. The last thing I needed was someone having huge expectations of me that I was in no state to fulfil.
“That’s okay. We can keep it casual. At least to start with.”
His words left me wanting him more. The idea of maybe moving onto something one day appealed to me. I didn’t want to rush into anything huge, not yet. Parts of me were still so raw.
“Suits me.”
“Where’s your bedroom?” he asked, breathless.
Without a word, I took his hand and led him up the hallway. Pausing as I reached my bedroom door, I took a deep breath and kept going to the first spare room. I couldn’t bring myself to go to my own bed; it didn’t feel right to sleep with someone else there. I’d address that problem later, just another thing to add to my therapy list.
“This way.” I pushed the door open, flicking on the soft light that had lit this room when it was Finn’s. For once I was thankful for the lower-wattage bulbs Matt had put in for the kids. I so rarely came in here; I hadn’t changed a thing. It left the room in a warm gentle glow. The only thing that had changed when they’d moved was the kids’ beds were gone, replaced with the queen size bed that had occupied the room before.
“I didn’t picture this.” I turned to see Dylan flicking a glance around the room. This was Ella through and through. The wallpaper was pastel-striped, the bedspread lemon. It was so far removed from the dark colours I liked. It almost seemed sacrilegious to have sex in this room the way it was.
Dylan caught my other hand, pulling me toward him. Those warm lips were on me again, caressing my own with such care as he fiddled with the buttons on my shirt. Starting from the bottom, I helped him, meeting his hands in the middle. As I pulled the fabric from my shoulders, he stroked the bare skin, gripping my arms tight, kissing me so hard I thought I might bruise.
Letting go, he pulled at his own T-shirt, slipping it over his head to show his chiselled body. Without thinking, I reached out and ran a hand down his chest as he smiled.
In a Heartbeat (Lifetime Book 2) Page 8
