Mordred-Night Wolves
Page 30
Compared to his socially conscious wife, Sir Gwavas was level-headed and intelligent. He had never been satisfied in his marriage, but that had never been too much of a problem as it was entirely easy to distract and ignore his wife. She had her own ideas of what her role was, and was never concerned by his expectations. As this seldom interfered with his interests, Sir Gwavas had largely let his wife manage things that interested her. Several of his children showed promise in their abilities, but his wife always whisked them away too quickly for her husband to have much of an effect on their lives. With no real interest in children, this had not bothered the man. Not until Kerensa.
As a young child, Kerensa was thought to be mute and intellectually inferior to the other Gwavas children. When she was four years old, Sir Gwavas had wandered into her room looking for something one of his servants had told him was in the child’s room. He had questioned why that was the case, but none had been able to provide an adequate response as no one knew how the tool had made its way there. Kerensa was quietly playing. Her soft green eyes turned toward him, but he did not see what his wife, children, and servants saw as the child looked at him. The look in her eye was one of curiosity and observation, almost like she was studying him. She watched him for a moment, as if she expected him to do something. When he simply stood there and looked at her, the young child had returned to her play. Instead of looking for the tool that he had come to get, Sir Gwavas had moved to the side and observed her. After a few minutes, he realized there was a pattern and method to her play – Kerensa was building things with toys, despite not having the necessary education or equipment to construct anything. What had initially looked like a messy pile of dolls was clearly a replication of the cathedral they had been to a few days before.
Sir Gwavas moved over and sat beside his daughter. He knew that she had never spoken a word, but he was curious if she could hear him or understand if she was spoken to directly.
“Hello Kerensa. It looks like you have made the dolls into the St. Bernard Cathedral.”
Her little face shifted back to him, her blond curls bouncing beside her adorable face. She simply blinked at him.
Thinking that the child could not comprehend, he decided to speak of the place’s relation to their family as he looked over the strange replication of such a famous structure. “You know there is actually a tunnel here,” he pointed at a back area where there was a gap in the dolls, “it goes down several miles and it was used to help hide our family during the civil war four hundred years ago. That is how we came into power, by sticking to the side of the queen, even after she was removed from the throne. It is strange to think how different things would have been if they had not been able to hide there. How different would the family line have been without that help at a critical time.”
“We wouldn’t be.”
The voice was small, but very serious. Sir Gwavas looked around the room to find the source. Kerensa’s instructor was nowhere to be found. Frowning, he realized that his youngest daughter had no supervision. “Where is your nanny? Your mother should have someone here watching you.”
The voice spoke up again from beside him, “In there with him.”
Sir Gwavas looked around again, but a movement from beside him caught his attention. Looking at his daughter, the man saw that she was pointing to a closet.
“Kerensa…did you speak?”
She looked at her father and blinked, her little arm still extended toward the closet.
The man stood up and strode over to the closet, a look of concern on his face. He pulled the door open and found a young woman and one of his servants mostly in a state of undress. The look of horror on their faces would have been humorous if not for the fact that his daughter had witnessed something that was very inappropriate. Without a word, Sir Gwavas closed the door. He walked over to his daughter and held out his hand. A gentle smile played on his lips, “It looks like their business is going to take a little longer. I think you should come with me dear.”
Kerensa’s face did not change, nor did she say a word as she stood up. Placing her little hand in his, she let her father lead her out of the room.
The next morning, the young girl woke to see her father standing at the window looking out. “Father?” Her voice was firmer than the day before.
The man turned with a smile, “I thought that you could join me every morning.” She simply blinked at him. “Would that be alright with you?” he asked realizing that a young girl may not be too keen on spending her days with a bunch of men and their books. A smile slowly crept across the girl’s face and she nodded.
Perhaps that was why her mother had entirely forgotten about the youngest daughter, because for over a decade she had been in the care of her father. If Kerensa’s mother had thought about her at all, then Lady Gwavas would likely have assumed that her husband would raise the girls with the same understanding and values shared by the other women of their social standing. So, it was that an early misunderstanding of the young girl’s silence and intellect ended up freeing her from her mother’s attention and giving her a world that was better suited to her interests.
When that life was interrupted a few weeks before her 16th birthday, Kerensa had not taken it well. She had maintained rational arguments with her mother, sisters, and sisters-in-law, but to no avail. The woman could not understand how a young girl could possibly be interested in anything other than socializing and marriage. Kerensa could not understand what they could not understand about how unsatisfying she felt their lives were. Finally, everything came to a head over three years later at a family gathering. Two of Kerensa’s siblings and their spouses were in attendance for the falling out of her mother’s efforts.
Lady Gwavas was still hoping to make her youngest daughter into a desirable partner, or to at least to teach the young woman the error of her ways. Knowing that the daughter and Sir Gwavas had a tight bond, the woman thought it best to address him with the problem at hand. “Darling, did you know that Kerensa didn’t feel that marriage was good enough for her. She told me this just the other day at the Jostine’s Ball. Apparently, she incorrectly believed that it is unsuitable for the life she thinks she wants. It took a good bit of persuading, but Jeannie and I finally made her understand the truth.” Her husband simply looked at her, so the woman turned to her daughter and daughter-in-law, “Is that not the silliest thing you have ever heard?”
The eldest son’s wife spoke first, “What else would she do?”
Kerensa’s sister picked up from there, “I can see why she would feel that way though. It’s not like boys flock to her with those ugly things she wears on her face.”
Her sister-in-law leaned over, “You really should stop wearing those dear. You are so much prettier without them.”
Kerensa raised an eyebrow as the three men in the room looked on with interest in the feminine bullying of the youngest member of the family. Pushing her glasses up a little on her face, Kerensa was not about to listen to the harebrained advice of the women in the room. “You do realize that I wear these because I do not see well, right? Without them, I will look rather foolish stumbling around any room.”
Her mother laughed, “You don’t need to see or move around, my dear. You just need to stand still and be seen. That’s what matters.”
The other two women quickly agreed as the young woman blinked at them. Finally, Kerensa decided now was as good a time as any to point out that she did not in fact subscribe to the life the rest of the women cherished, “I will not live my life blind the way you three have.”
Though they did not understand the exact meaning, the three women did recognize an insult when spoken from the youngest daughter. Kerensa’s sister was first to find words to express her annoyance, “We have lived our lives knowing full well what we needed to do and we are all happy for it.” Her voice was full of disdain for her sister and the idea that the women were anything other than completely satisfied with their lives.
Kerensa spoke
in a calm, nearly monotone voice, “You live in ignorance of your realities. Of course, you are happy, but you cannot pretend it is the same thing as knowing what you need to do.” Her eyes looked at the three men in the room, and suddenly there was a tension that had not been there before as she spoke, “I dare say all three of the men in the room would agree that you hardly know what you need to do.”
Her eldest brother began coughing as her brother-in-law looked on at her with curiosity. Only her father was smiling at the exchange.
Kerensa’s mother spoke up, “We know all that is required for women of our station. We give our men children and raise those children into a society that is fitting for their breeding. That is all our men expect from us, and we accomplish that as only high class women can.”
Kerensa cleared her throat, “That is true. They have come to expect no more from you. And yet, none of the men in this room are satisfied with your feeble contributions because you fail to please them in any way that actually matters to them. Once they have an heir, you serve very little other purpose since you do not believe that any more is required of you.”
The three women spluttered at such open contempt from Kerensa. Her sister-in-law was the first to speak up, “Surely they are happy with what we offer! There is nothing more noble or desirable than that. Right Fender, you are happy with me?” She turned to look at her husband, the eldest boy in the family.
He gave a slight inclination of his head and said, “My dear, I wouldn’t know how to ask more of you.”
Kerensa immediately burst into laughter, “Oh, but you are still the charmer, aren’t you Fender. It’s no wonder you are still able to bed any woman you take an interest in.”
Fender’s wife’s eyes went wide open as she turned to look at her sister-in-law, “There is no way he would do that!”
Kerensa simply looked at her and flashed a mirthless smile, “I have to admit that his appetite is far more restrained than my brother-in-law’s – he’s not particularly picky at all. The number of men he’s bedded is nearly as many as the number of women, and station does not play any part in his choices. Of course, he lives with Jeannie, so I can’t say that I blame him for wanting a constant escape from my sister. If she were to move back into this house, I would certainly have to leave that same day. I am just fortunate that I have that option, unlike my sister’s unfortunate husband.” The man watched with passive amusement, his eyes sparkling at the young woman as a hint of emotion was betrayed in her last response.
Kerensa’s mother was storming over to her when Kerensa’s father cut in, “Kerensa, dearest, I think you have said quite enough. Why don’t you go do some more of your studies? I hear that there is an exceptional dragon hunter in town. You may be able to do some real research on your latest paper.”
Kerensa’s eyes had gone wide as her mother turned on her husband, “She will stay here for the punishment she seems so eager to have. Did you not hear what she said about the lovely men in our presence?”
Her husband looked back at a newspaper as he responded, “I did. I also heard how you three were bullying her into thinking as you do instead of using persuasion to back your views. I fear that Kerensa has a far more intelligent and capable mind that you three are not likely to be able to persuade or bully. Our little Kerensa has read too much to believe any of the stuff that goes for common sense around certain types of women. Finally, and here is the part you clearly missed, neither of our lovely men here have denied what Kerensa said.” He looked up at his youngest child, “Go ahead honey. I heard that she was staying at the Cut Throat, so please make sure to take Chadwick and Manford with you.”
“She?” Kerensa’s eyes went wide. “You mean the dragon hunter is a woman!” It was the first time during the discussion where excitement and emotion were so obvious on her face. Kerensa’s mother stood in stunned silence as the pair ignored her.
The man held a finger up to his lips, “It’s a secret so make sure you are careful as you approach her.”
Kerensa hurried out of the room as her mother turned on her father. The last thing she heard was his request to the butler to take his wife for a lie down to calm her nerves.
Lady Gwavas largely gave up trying to improve and prepare her daughter following that day. She almost completely ignored the girl, deciding that the girl deserved whatever misery she created for herself. The woman’s attitude toward her husband was somewhat icy as well as she felt he was undermining her in her role. In the end, both the father and daughter took pleasure in the change, and Kerensa finally began to think of the direction she wanted to take her life.
Women were not allowed to be scholars, which proved to be a barrier that even money could not break for the young woman.
One night, the servant Chadwick had convinced the young woman to come out with him to a tavern. Kerensa had been too young to go before her mother’s meddling, then she had been forbidden as long as her mother was involved in her life. Now without anyone to tell her what she could and could not do in the home, Kerensa was more than happy to accompany the young man.
At first, Kerensa was entirely unimpressed with the kind of people in the establishment. Then a stunning red-haired woman had plopped down on a seat next to her.
“Don’t you think you are a little out of place here?”
Kerensa’s head turned, thinking that the woman must be addressing someone else. The young woman’s response was merely to look the gorgeous woman in the eyes. The woman tilted her head to the side and an exquisite grin spread across her face, “You don’t think so?”
The young woman blinked at her, “I doubt I am any more out of place than you are.”
The woman’s lips twitched as she looked the young woman over, “Oh, I am certainly more in my element here.” Conspiratorially, she leaned toward Kerensa, “I dare say that you are lucky that I am the first to approach. You do realize that the men over in the corner are talking about what they can do to the youngest daughter of Sir Gwavas, don’t you?”
Kerensa sat up straighter at the words, and she swallowed hard. Looking around, her eyes sought Chadwick, who had gone to get more drinks for them. She found him caught in conversation with a few men that she recognized from deliveries they had gotten recently.
Finally, her eyes met the red-haired woman’s gaze, “People really know who I am?”
“Of course. Do you really think that you blend in with those clothes?”
“I-I-I-“ It was one of the few times that Kerensa had been at a loss for words.
“Don’t worry. I will stay with you until your companion returns, but you and your lover had best get out of here before anything happens.”
Kerensa shook her head, “We aren’t that. I mean, he works for my father. And-”
The woman looked at the man, “That is an absolute shame. He is quite an attractive man.”
Kerensa’s head swiveled to look at Chadwick, who looked very energetic as he talked with the others. Now that she looked at him properly, she could see the woman’s point.
Suddenly there was a hand extended to her, “I’m Bree. Witch and spy for anyone in need of a particular type of assistance.”
Kerensa looked down at the hand, uncertain what to do. The woman named Bree stretched out her other hand and placed Kerensa’s hand in her’s. The motion was exaggerated as she shook the young woman’s hand. “It’s a hand shake. I hear it is all the rage with humans.”
Kerensa frowned, “Aren’t you a human?”
The laugh was almost hypnotical, “Gods bless you, but you are very generous. Most people would not say such a thing. So, what brings the daughter of one of the wealthiest families in one of the wealthiest nations on the planet to a tavern?”
Kerensa answered simply, “Research.”
The woman lifted both of her elegant eyebrows, “Research? What kind of research?”
That was all Kerensa needed before launching into her theories and ideas about Vetitum, a place renowned for its wealth, cold, and secl
usion from the rest of the world.
Bree proved to be an ideal listener. When the young woman finished talking, she quickly began to apologize for her enthusiasm, to which Bree waved off the words. “Never apologize for what you love. It taints it with a false sense of regret. Oh!” She looked at the young woman, “Actually, I think I may be able to help you.”
By the time Chadwick reached the women, Bree had told Kerensa about an expedition that was to leave Berenice in about six months. The witch had given her some advice on how to disguise her gender and how to behave so that she could pass as a man when surrounded by a ship full of men on a long journey. Kerensa got the impression that Bree spoke from personal experience as she quickly jotted down the ideas.
Now here Kerensa stood on the ship, dressed as a male researcher. She had been unable to cut her long hair, but in every other aspect, she had tried to appear masculine. It had been a particular challenge as none of the men in her life took the outfit seriously besides her father. He had given as much support as he could, but his time was incredibly limited and his assistance only given with half of his attention.
Only her father had seen her off as her mother and sister were completely against her taking a trip, and that was without knowing the full extent of what she was to do. The young woman had been ok with that as it meant she could leave dressed as a man without anyone causing trouble for her. Sir Gwavas had given her a big hug the evening before and wished her well. Chadwick was to join her as a research attendant because even Sir Gwavas was not entirely comfortable with his daughter on a ship full of men without someone he could trust. He also was very aware that Chadwick was in love with his daughter, but this appeared to be more of a boone as that meant the man would keep a close eye on Kerensa.
Her eyes looked over everything, from the ship to the men to the water. It was surreal and wonderful. With a smile, Kerensa bent over to pick up her luggage as a young man began to pass her.