Desire (Montana Dreams Book 3)

by Jarrod, Cait

  Without looking, she knew who stood behind her. Who witnessed her jean-clad butt sticking up in the air as she held a private pity party, tears and all? She dug deep, plastered on a reserve that said I-don’t-give-a-shit, all while ordering her galloping pulse to settle and kick starting her lungs to draw in air. She swiped a gloved hand over her cheeks and under her nose and readied to face the root of her unrest. If only he knew.

  With her nerves on edge, she jumped off the last board of the fence to the ground. Her boots sunk slightly into the topsoil, and she faced the person who taught her the true meaning of desire. The virile man she discarded the day she left the hospital.

  The familiar form had changed his dress pants for cargos. No longer did he wear a polo shirt, but a flannel. His presence, rather than commanding, held the distinct air of comfort, just as it always had. Heart pounding in her chest, sweat beading on her forehead, every inch of her wanted to run into his strong arms. She needed to feel his strength and have him tell her that everything was okay, like he’d done when they were teens. That when he learned how her behavior stole a piece of her…a piece of him, he would forgive her.

  With his thumb and forefinger, he tipped his cowboy hat forward a fraction. “Cadence.”

  His smooth voice rumbled over her. It stirred parts that hadn’t been roused in such a long time that she almost didn’t recognize the tug knotting low in her belly. The attraction between them zipped through the air like an electrical charge. Amazing.

  Hundreds of days had passed since they’d crossed the line of friends and did the unthinkable, a night of hot sex. Her face flamed, remembering the things he did to her and what she’d done to him. She demanded he leave after being a saint, staying by her bedside in the hospital, and only leaving her to visit with his sister. And yet, the invisible charge still threatened to yank her into his arms.

  Staying at Trina’s house, she should have figured Bradley might show. Maybe in the silent parts of her consciousness, where her true thoughts and feelings lay hidden, she knew he would visit and that’s why she came. Whatever the reason, she didn’t know how to deal with seeing him. Emotions swarmed her like bees, so she went with wit; a defense mechanism that camouflaged her turmoil. “Wow, it’s Sparky!”

  Light brown hair with sun-tipped ends fell around his tanned face. He wore a gloomy smile. His upbringing, like hers, insisted they speak pleasantries. His dull, blue-green eyes revealed he wasn’t thrilled to see her. She didn’t blame him. She didn’t want to see herself either.

  “Still sassy as ever.”

  No she wasn’t, not even close. “Of course. What brings you to Montana?”

  “My sister and brother-in-law, and…” His voice dropped an octave, and he cleared his throat. “To see you.”

  He motioned toward her, and the sound of her heart cracking pummeled her ears. “It’s good to see you,” she lied. It was wonderful. Escaping before the buried feelings surfaced and she became a blubbering idiot, she pointed toward the parking lot. “I have a thing.”

  “Of course, you do.”

  His judgmental tone stopped her. “What is that supposed to mean?”

  He moved closer—darn him—and didn’t stop until the toe of his boots came close to touching hers. His drinkable lips cocked to the side and his eyes narrowed a fraction, enough so that they twinkled. Again with the strong attraction! Did it stir because she’d kept him at a distance for so long? Or guilt from what she took from him? Whatever the reason, it needed to go.

  “It means, why run? Why run from me?” His tone dripped with honey, so Bradley, so freaking nice Bradley. The guy who would do anything for anyone. The one who put others before himself. The guy who didn’t argue when she professed she didn’t have feelings for him. That moment in time, tied in an emotional ball, she did what she believed was right. Still believed it. If that was so, then why did she have such strong emotions where it felt like her heart would crack open any second? And why in his presence, did the thread holding her together threaten to break?

  She couldn’t do this. Couldn’t be around Bradley, couldn’t peer into those eyes that held passion, understanding, and darn it, for one night, love. And she sure couldn’t do small talk. “Listen…”

  He pressed two fingers to her lips. The connection zapped and zinged, igniting every nerve ending. “Don’t. Save the snappy remark you’re ready to bark out.”

  As far as she remembered, he’d never ordered her. He went with the flow, listened, and if he didn’t agree with something she did, he let her know, but he never snapped. This change in his personality was her fault. “You grew balls.”

  “You have firsthand knowledge about my anatomy,” he said, not missing a beat.

  Crap! Her face flushed. The conversation switched into a direction she didn’t want to explore. “I was drunk and don’t remember.”

  The gleam in his eye registered she left herself wide open. Geez, she missed the days when she created a comeback that stopped people in their tracks.

  “Want a reminder?” He closed his eyes, locked his jaw, and gave his head a slight shake. The clue that he hadn’t wanted to say what he had. Thank goodness!

  “Like I said, I have a thing.”

  She sidestepped him and moved toward the house, ignoring the heat of his gaze on her back. Instead, she focused on the cage where Autumn kept her ferret, to seek out Hopper’s slinky body; anything to take her mind off running to him, stepping into his arms, and basking in his strength.

  “We’ll have to figure out how to coexist,” he yelled across the way, not caring that Divine customers watched. She didn’t know what to make of him and paused on the path in between the petting zoo and garden nursery. “I’m here to break your horse, not you.”

  She jolted. Erotic thoughts flashed in her mind. She ordered her feet to move, to maintain an even stride to hide the effect his words had on her, and to stop from acting on the tempting picture he painted. But they didn’t budge.

  ****

  If Bradley said he didn’t like hearing Cadence’s sharp gasp, he’d be lying. The quick intake of breath revealed she was as put off at being around him as he was her. And the jolt… Christ! Her body—flinching under the cotton t-shirt, peeking between the panels of her jacket, giving him one hell of a show—brought back thoughts better left buried. Damn, this visit would be the death of him.

  One call from his kid sister pulled him away from the sandy beaches on the Gulf of Mexico and threw him into hell. There, he had been free of a dark-haired, dreamy-eyed beauty that had haunted his fantasies since his first wet dream.

  Just looking into Cadence’s beautiful, shocked eyes, his heart squeezed. It pissed him off; he didn’t want to feel anything. She’d kicked him to the curb after they had the best sex he ever experienced. Basically saying, “Fuck you!” He wanted no part of being here, but damn he loved his sister and her new family. So he ate crow. “You can close your mouth now.”

  Cadence’s eyes returned to normal size and she did as he asked, shutting her mouth then biting her bottom lip. Do girls take a class to learn how to drive guys crazy?

  “I can handle Thor.”

  He searched for something flippant to say, to stop her from looking at him as if she wanted to eat him up. Then, her expression changed to disgust and his ability to come up with a clever retort disappeared. “Take a break.”

  Never, never tell Cadence what to do. He learned that in Cadence 101 at six-years-old. She was three, and he was putty in her hands. Still was, because he wanted to do whatever she asked to put a smile on her face.

  She blinked, as if what he said took time to penetrate her mind. Her eyes narrowed, her hands went to her hips, and her chest heaved. Not in the heavy-panting-flushed-face-from-great-sex way, as it did the night they were together, but as if she was building steam, getting ready to let him have it. He held his ground, inched closer until the toe of his boots touched hers, and waited for the Cadence blowout.

  The fire in her eyes weakened,
and her posture slackened. Sadness skittered through her gorgeous features. Damn. Why the about-face? She gave nothing away, gave no clue as to why she’d climbed into such a black hole. Other than a hip that might cause her pain occasionally, the doctors had said she was good as new after the accident. So why was she depressed? “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing.” She shook her head so fast he swore it vibrated, and while her head adopted a new habit, she took a giant step backwards. “If you think you can train him, go for it.”

  An ant-crawling sensation covered his neck and back. Again, no fight? No gumption to bite his head off for giving orders? “What gives?”

  A smile softened her face for the first time. “I’m peachy. Have fun.” She wound her way between the garden nursery and petting zoo toward the house, her strides sure and formidable.

  Bullshit! Knowing he should do something was different from acting on it. Right now, his mind said, “No! Leave and go tend to the horse, break him, and get the hell out of Bluebird Valley.” The thing about having a conscience was that it gave the orders and demanded his legs not to put distance between them but to follow her.

  He raced down the path and grasped her arm in Trina and Matt’s backyard. Moisture covered her face, and her mouth turned down. She stared at his chest, and Christ, lord help him; he pulled her close, and rested his chin on her head. She didn’t fight, didn’t say a word, just cried. As if he tugged the cork out of a watering trough, tears soaked his shirt.

  His chest clenched so tight it became unbearable to breathe. When she hiccupped in between sobs, he tightened his grip and kissed the top of her head. Where did the vivacious woman go who claimed attention just by walking into a room? Ironic that he came to Divine to break a horse and found a broken woman. “Something is seriously wrong,” Trina had said. Until right now, he didn’t give enough credence to the severity of the situation. Didn’t believe she was shattered, not Cadence, the woman who tackled life head on.

  In college, he’d come home the day he learned a man attempted to rob her. His sister and best friend relived the story, laughing about the mugger’s face when Cadence had kneed him in the balls. She was a woman that took care of herself and didn’t accept handouts.

  She pulled in a breath and pushed away from his body. “I’m sorry.” After a pat to the wet spot on his shirt, she finished her journey to the house. He let the sting of her dismissal slip over him, in order to put his one-sided feelings in their place, behind a wall of “who cares.”

  Cadence disappeared inside just as the roar of powerful motors, tearing across the field, met his ears. His brother-in-law, Matt, stopped his four-wheeler in front of him, lifted his DIVINE cap, and swiped a hand over his dark hair before covering his head. His keen eyes that once zeroed in on enemy snipers during the war inspected him. “Find out anything?” Before he answered, Matt’s brother, Travis, who looked exactly like him, dropped to the ground next to them. A light colored dog tagged along and sat beside Travis, his tongue hanging out as if he smiled.

  Bradley did a mental review of the conversation. Trina, Matt, and Travis couldn’t explain Cadence’s unpredictable behavior, keeping late hours, looking miserable, and the one thing that shot a bullet through his bloodstream … her sleeping wherever. “Nope.”

  “She’s hurting.” Autumn, Travis’ girlfriend, approached from Matt and Trina’s house with her ferret, Hopper, whose beady eyes looked like they were peering through a mask. Little ears stood straight up, giving the white outline around his eyes a more prominent appearance. His long, slick body snuggled into his owner in a way that said, “Yeah, I’m a bad ass.” Autumn knelt next to Rufus, her braided hair falling over her shoulder, and rubbed the dog’s short muzzle and tan fur. Hopper licked the massive puppy’s nose, who in turn swiped his tongue over the ferret, covering half of him.

  Bradley rubbed a hand over his mouth and chin. “A bullmastiff and a ferret are buddies, what’s next?”

  Travis laughed. “You’ve come to a zoo, expect the unexpected.”

  “And watch out for the hay bales.” Autumn winked, her gray eyes sparkling as she zeroed in on Travis then patted her leg. “Hungry?”

  “Sure am.” Travis gave a lopsided grin. Rufus snapped to attention and raced toward the cedar-sided house, a couple hundred yards away.

  “Later.” She smiled at Travis and followed the dog.

  “Rufus is well trained.” Bradley scrunched his eyebrows and took in the barn to the right of the petting zoo. “What’s wrong with the hay?”

  Chuckling, Matt revved the engine. “A story for another day. We’re off to fix fences.” Travis nodded as he drove after his brother’s four-wheeler.

  The screen door slapped against the doorjamb. “Trina wants to see you.” Cadence descended the porch steps and headed toward the parking lot.

  This was it. This was why Trina asked him to come. To find out where she went and with whom. To spy.

  He waited for Cadence to pull out of Divine’s parking lot before he waved at Trina, coming onto the porch. She crossed her arms over her very pregnant belly, eyes teary. Darn it. Hating that she was upset, he jogged to her, and engulfed her in a hug. “I’ll get her,” he said with his chin resting against her head. “She’ll be okay.” Dread parked in his gut with his uncertainty. “Gotta go.” With a quick kiss on her check, he made a break for his rented truck. Damn, he hoped she wasn’t off to pick up some dude.

  Chapter Two

  Cadence peeked in her rear view mirror. “Darn it!” The orangish-colored truck stayed several car lengths behind her for the last few miles. Bradley! A horse whisperer? Tracker was more like it.

  She groaned and white-knuckled the wheel, some of the tension in her shoulders easing. Trina didn’t mean any harm. Her friend didn’t know Bradley’s closeness threw her into a tailspin of irrational judgement. Hell, any thought of him had done that for years, though she used to deal with her reaction to him better.

  The Dusty Spur came into view. She’d frequented the pub plenty of times during the day to read a good book and relax, and wanted to keep it out of her nightlife. But with Bradley hot on her heels, she needed a place to hide quickly and discourage him from following.

  She parked her car, jogged past a row of pickup trucks, and hurried through the door. The aroma of hot oil and fries twisted her stomach and the low-lit room jerked her to a stop as her eyes adjusted. A passel of leering men leaned on the bar, adorned in cowboy boots, flannels, and jeans. Any other time, she’d talk smack on how they’d make a great calendar, minus the shirts. With Bradley sure to step inside soon, she needed to move toward men that weren’t two sheets in the wind, or under in their case, to brush him off. With an I’m-not-interested head bob at the cowboys, she circumvented them and their overwhelming scent of alcohol, and beelined toward the back.

  Servers bee-bopped, winding their way through the tables, carrying trays one-handed above their heads. One waitress smiled. As she moved closer and slid pass Cadence, she realized she wasn’t the reason the young girl smiled. Nope, two delicious-looking guys who didn’t wear smug expressions, winked at her from behind the waitress. Perfect.

  She settled in between them at a high top table, the position giving her a view of the entrance. Bradley walked in. This came as no surprise, yet her mouth went dry and heart fluttered. His rugged good looks, heightened by the red flannel shirt on broad shoulders, stood out in a bar full of cocky cowboys. The drunken men in the front of the bar nodded their welcome and women’s heads turned. Damnit!

  When she left Divine, she planned to find a guy to spend time with, lose herself in conversation, and forget about the feelings she didn’t want to face. But with women flocking toward Bradley, an odd, indescribable emotion flared, and her meddlesome thoughts grew more contrary.

  He tapped his knuckles on the counter. The eager barmaid, who appeared happy to see new blood, quickly placed a mug of beer in front of him. He downed half of it; his eyes glued to Cadence.

  The tingles sh
e’d worked so hard to get rid of returned. She shifted, tried to enjoy the attention from the two hot guys—introduced as Jace and Garth—and let them sandwich her between their seats. Her eyes, darn them, wouldn’t stay off Bradley and his red shirt. The color enhanced his dark eyes, and a light covering of sexy facial hair weakened her knees.

  Hearing the men chuckle, but not what Jace had said, she forced a loud laugh. Bradley grimaced and gulped his beer. Good, she got to him. He was better off without someone who didn’t face their fears and too chicken to tell the truth. She swallowed. Better off without her. To bring home the point, she touched Garth’s arm to prove the farce that Bradley didn’t interest her anymore.

  But when Bradley planted his cute derriere on a barstool next to a long-legged blonde, Cadence bit the inside of her cheek. More women gathered around him, smiling and ogling him. She bit her tongue. “Ouch!”

  A country band took the stage in the center of the building, and people filed onto the wooden dance floor.

  “Would you honor me with a dance?” The slow drawl of the dimple-faced cowboy, Jace, snagged the corners of her lips, and she smiled.

  “I’m next.” The golden-haired, more reserved Garth said.

  “Who said I’m sharing?” Jace kissed the back of her hand. “If that’s okay with you?”

  Surprisingly content in this gorgeous man’s arms, her determination to bury feelings, and protect her heart, came back. “Fine with me.”

  He tugged her onto the dance floor, held her hand against his chest, and rested his other one on her waist. A charmer and easy on the eyes, he glided her over the floor, flowing with the music as she chanced a peek beneath her lashes at Bradley. With his eyes locked on her, he straightened and moseyed toward them. She groaned.

  “What’s wrong, darling?”

  “May I?” Bradley’s low baritone quickened her pulse before she responded to Jace.