A Hero’s Honor

by Tessa Layne

  Travis crawled into his SUV, tossed his phone on the passenger seat and sat, hands on the wheel. If he breathed deeply, he could still detect the faint residue of Elaine’s perfume. He couldn’t bring himself to start the vehicle. He’d never been a full-fledged civilian. He’d gone right from the military to the police academy, and from there, straight home to Prairie. Apprehension fluttered at the edge of his conscious. His new life started the second he pulled out of the parking space. The cell phone taunted him from the middle of the seat. Thoughts spun in his head like they were on a wash cycle.

  Don’t be a chickenshit.

  Letting his head fall back, he shut his eyes, mustering the courage to pick up the phone. “Fuck it.” He reached for the phone before he could psych himself out, or come up with a million reasons why what he was about to do was a bad idea. He scrolled through his contacts, thumb twitching when he reached the name. His pulse raced, sounding like a drum in the small space. He hit the call button, stomach tightening with each ring.

  And voicemail.

  Clearing his throat, he waited for the brief greeting to end. “Colt. Travis. Look… I know this is long overdue, and I’ve been an ass.” He laughed harshly. “Hell, worse than an ass… I’d like to properly apologize. Call me?”

  He clicked off and stared at his brother’s contact information. The lost years, the countless missed opportunities hung before him like a banner. His throat closed, remorse washing over him. He took a shuddering breath. He’d made a start, and it might not come to anything, but it was a start. He started the engine. One down, one to go.

  CHAPTER 30

  Hope flamed to life in Travis’s chest as he pulled away from the Grace home. There were only four places Elaine was likely to be, and she wasn’t at the first three. It was unreasonable for him under any circumstance to hope that Elaine would be home, waiting for him. But as he made the turn onto his own drive, hope was there, burning inside him. And when he saw her sitting on the front porch with Dottie, who bristled like a prairie chicken defending its turf, it spread like a grass fire down to his toes.

  The urge to race to the porch and sweep her in his arms was powerful. But instinctively he knew that would only make it worse. What had Weston said about unprecedented groveling? Worry niggled at him, but he brushed it away. He was a man on a mission and defeat was not an option. His heart slammed into his chest as he kept his pace unhurried and stopped a few feet from the bottom step.

  He kept his eyes laser-focused on Elaine, even though the mistrustful look in her eyes gutted him. With a jolt, he recognized her expression. She looked just like that in her early days at the diner. Scared yet determined. What an idiot. Beating was too good for him. He alone was responsible for putting the hurt there, the mistrust.

  “Where’s Dax?”

  “Over at Hansen’s with Hope and Gunnar. They’ll bring him home after dinner.” Dottie answered with a note of accusation in her voice.

  Still keeping his gaze riveted on Elaine, he opened his hands. “It’s okay Dottie. I’ve been an ass. I know. I reacted and I couldn’t listen.”

  Something flickered in Elaine’s eyes, feeding his hope. “I took care of Lawson.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  He rolled his fingers, flexing his hand. “Let’s just say he’s not gonna look too pretty in his election day victory photo.”

  Dottie snorted and threw up her hands. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “I can’t serve as sheriff if I’m not currently holding a law enforcement position.”

  “Talk plain, Travis.” Dottie snapped, having clearly run out of patience.

  “Fine, you want plain talk?” He stayed focused on Elaine, watching for any signs that she might be softening. He’d work with any opening she gave him “I read your file.”

  She winced and looked down, two bright spots slashing her cheeks.

  “All of it. I also read up on Lawson and put two and two together. I paid him a visit and took action that cost me my job as police chief.”

  She gasped, covering her mouth, eyebrows at her hairline. “Oh no, Travis. You shouldn’t have. He’ll come after you.” Fear filled her beautiful blue eyes.

  That was a good sign, wasn’t it? That she was worried about his safety?

  “Nope. He won’t. Weston has put his source in touch with the attorney general. I think we’ll see an investigation opened.” He hooked his thumbs in his belt loops. “But I resigned. It wouldn’t be right for me to stay police chief after what I did. Especially because it felt damned good to punch his lights out.”

  Elaine let out a strangled noise tinged with hysteria.

  “On the drive back, I realized what’s most important in my life is right here. You and Dax. That is if you can forgive me.” He offered his hand, hope pounding in his chest. “I also remembered that the night of the First Responder’s Ball I told you that you didn’t have to tell me anything about your past until you were ready.” He took a deep breath. “And obviously from my behavior, you were justified. I failed you and I’m sorry.”

  Her eyes darted to his outstretched hand then back to his face. Once. Twice. She worried her bottom lip between her teeth, clearly distressed. He couldn’t breathe in or out. Like bailing wire had been wrapped too tight around his chest.

  “I’m so sorry I didn’t trust you enough to tell you. Dottie was the only person who knew, and she promised to keep it to herself.”

  Everything in him itched to go to her, wrap her in his arms and kiss the pain from her face, but he couldn’t. Not until she met him halfway. He’d laid everything out for her, and if he’d blown it because he’d been an assfuck, then so be it. He’d have to live with the consequences.

  She took a ragged breath, eyes searching his. “I wanted to start over here. To give Dax a safe and stable place to grow up. And Dottie gave me that chance. I didn’t want to blow it.”

  “You didn’t, I did,” he murmured.

  She looked at him sharply, but continued. “I know how small towns can be. I was afraid that if word got out, people would treat us differently – would treat Dax differently – if they knew that my past was… less than pristine. And you…” Her cheeks turned the prettiest shade of pink as her voice turned husky. “Always made me feel like a lady. I didn’t want that to go away. I didn’t want to disappoint you, and I’m so sorry I did.”

  His feet disobeyed a direct order from his brain to stay put. He was on the porch in three steps, clasping her shoulders. “You didn’t, sweetheart. I’m the disappointment. I’m not happy you didn’t confide in me, but I understand why, and I’ll do better, every day, to earn your trust. To show you how much I love and value you.” His mouth was on board with his feet too, completely ignoring his brain’s command to stop talking before he ruined things again. “Your strength, your kindness, your patience, your–”

  “Travis,” Dottie interjected. “If you don’t ask this girl to marry you right now, I am never serving you coffee again.”

  Elaine laughed, tears spilling out of her eyes.

  He kissed her wet cheeks, salt from her tears sharp on his tongue. “I’m stubborn and set in my ways.”

  “I break rules,” she spoke barely above a whisper.

  “Break them all, I don’t care. As long as I can come home to you and Dax every night.”

  Her eyes filled with worry. “What are you going to do now that you don’t have a job?”

  “I’ll figure it out. Right now, I don’t care. All I care about is right here.”

  Dottie sighed loudly. “Well, you two kids are gonna be just fine.” She gave them both a quick embrace. “I’m gonna get on home and check in on Cassidy. She’s been helping Parker with his physical therapy. I think they’re about to set a wedding date. You kids these days, not a one of you has had a decent engagement. And now Carolina’s making noise about getting married by Christmas. Expect us all to make a celebration overnight.”

  Dottie reached up and clasped his chin. “You�
�re a good man, Travis. I’m real proud of you.”

  Warmth spread across his chest. His voice grew rough. “Thanks. For always being there.” The remaining words stuck somewhere in the back of his throat.

  She patted his cheek. “Love you too, sweetie pie. See you two tomorrow night.”

  When her truck disappeared down the drive, Travis turned to Elaine. “Well?” Her eyes turned to dark pools and he held her gaze for a long moment. He could lose himself in her. Hell, he was already lost. “Will you make a life with me? Here?” He couldn’t keep the gravel out of his voice. Or the hope.

  A thousand emotions crossed her face while his stomach did jumping jacks. “I want to…” Her voice was full of hesitation. Not the enthusiastic response he’d hoped for. He tried to tamp down the feelings of despair. “But?” He wasn’t going to give up easily. Not if there was an outside chance for them.

  “I think we need to ask Dax what he thinks.”

  “Done.”

  “And I don’t want to commit to anything permanent until I’m free and clear.”

  “I can’t say I like that, but I get it.”

  “With any luck, all of this will be behind us on Wednesday. Would you ask me again?”

  He’d keep asking. But a man could only live with so much uncertainty “Only if I already know the answer.”

  She tilted her chin, eyes glowing. “If you haven’t figured out that I’m crazy about you, I don’t know what else to do.”

  “You can kiss me for starters.”

  CHAPTER 31

  Travis looked around his crowded living room with a sense of satisfaction. The last time it had been this full was at his dad’s wake. Tonight, instead of casseroles and jello molds, Jamey Sinclaire and Dottie had driven the food truck over and set out platters of sliders, French fry cups, and a fancy kind of coleslaw. In the spirit of election night, they’d invited everyone to cast votes for their favorite slider. The winner would be featured on their menu and called The Sheriff.

  A small group was gathered around the television he’d brought downstairs, others were checking their phones as the results trickled in. Dax stirred in his lap and burrowed deeper into his shoulder, lightly snoring. He eyed Elaine. “What do you think? Should I take him upstairs?”

  She nodded. “His teeth are brushed and it’s a school night. I know he didn’t want to miss anything, but let’s tuck him in.”

  “I’ve got it. You stay right here.” Before she could object, he’d stood, draping the boy over his shoulder. Bedtimes were fast becoming a favorite part of his day. Tucking in Dax, reading him a story, and receiving goodnight hugs and kisses hit a place deep within him. A place where everything was right with the world. After pulling up the covers around his chin, he brushed a kiss on Dax’s temple, and quietly shut the door, tamping down the pang of regret as he caught sight of Colton’s posters on the wall. It had only been twenty-four hours. He was silly to hope Colton would call back right away. He slipped back into his chair and caught Elaine’s hand, twining their fingers and bringing the back of her hand to his lips.

  Elaine’s eyes lit up. “No matter what happens, I’m proud of you. You ran a good campaign.”

  “Even if I lose?”

  “Even if you lose.”

  “I still think you should have hit Lawson with mail.” Weston flopped into a chair next to them, and shoved two bottles of Mike’s root beer their way.

  “My fist was so much nicer,” said Travis flexing his hand with the bruised knuckles.

  “Speaking of.” Weston leaned forward, eyes gleaming. “Have you given any thought to what’s next?”

  Travis scoffed. “No. I spent the day playing with Dax and Elaine. Time enough to think about it when the results are finalized.”

  Weston pulled a pen from his breast pocket and grabbed a paper towel lying in the middle of the table. He started to sketch. “So I’ve had this idea rolling around my head for a few weeks. And now that you’re done with law enforcement…”

  Travis groaned. “Oh no. Not another one of your crazy ideas.”

  “Hear me out.”

  Travis eyed Elaine. “This is how I ended up running for sheriff.”

  “That turned out okay, didn’t it?” Elaine teased with a wink.

  “Fine. Lay it on me.”

  Weston kept drawing. “You’ve always said you can’t be a ranch of one.”

  “Right.”

  “How many would you need? To run your ideal operation?”

  “Depends on what you’re looking to do. Minimum five, but maybe more.”

  “Who’s your family?”

  He didn’t have the patience for this tonight. “Are you going to explain or put me through twenty questions?”

  “Go with me. Who’s your family?”

  “Colt. But he’s a lost cause.”

  “Give him time.” Elaine squeezed his hand. “He hasn’t heard from you in years.”

  Weston nodded. “It’s not like he’s going to come running back and sing kumbaya the first time you call. Hell, maybe never.”

  Hearing Weston put it like that, stung. But it was a truth he’d have to live with. Colt might never come back. He stowed his regret. Plenty more time for self-examination after tonight.

  Weston continued, an enthusiastic light in his eye. “Who else is your family?”

  “You. Cash. Braden.”

  “Count me out because I have a new job that suddenly taking up a lot of my time. That gives you three.”

  “I’m four,” Elaine offered shyly.

  Hearing her say that warmed him to his toes. “You’re going to start community college soon though.”

  “I can still help.”

  “Fair enough. So we have four.”

  Weston pushed the drawing in front of him. “Resolution Ranch. Where healing and husbandry come together.”

  Travis made a face. “I don’t get it.”

  “That’s because you’re not thinking. What do we have right here in Prairie? Land. Hope Sinclaire helping people like you and Cassie train wild mustangs. We’ve got buildings, and people who can build more. You’ve got a fixed-up barn, and space for bunkhouses.” Weston’s face grew more animated as he spoke. “You think we’re the only ones who’ve struggled returning to civilian life? Why not create a safe landing space for our brothers in arms? A place to get physical and emotional help? We could ask Dr. Munger if he’d consult with us. I’ll admit, he has some harebrained ideas about physical labor and sensitizing our triggers, but I think we can both agree he’s helped us. Why not help others?”

  Travis rocked back in his chair, chewing on the idea. He chuckled, shaking his head. “I’ll hand it to you, Wes, you never think small, do you?”

  Weston’s face lit up. “Go big or go home.”

  Elaine squeezed his hand, eyes bright. “I think that’s a wonderful idea, Travis.”

  Travis’s thoughts raced. Would they come? It had been months since he’d talked to either Cash or Braden. He still had some of his nest-egg left. “It might be worth a few calls to gauge their interest.”

  A collective groan came up from the group gathered in front of the TV. Someone cursed, and it grew unnaturally quiet. He brought the chair down with a thunk and Elaine shot him a worried look.

  Gunnar Hansen spoke up, disappointment clear in his voice. “Final count has you down by thirty-six votes. Sorry man.”

  Even though he’d prepared for it, disappointment stabbed through him. Not because he lost, but because Lawson won. “Damn.”

  Elaine wrung her hands, face scrunched. “Oh, this is all my fault. I’m so sorry.”

  “Shh.” He draped an arm around her pulling her close. “We’re not going to kick that dead horse. Yesterday’s mail didn’t help, but it was already close. And I didn’t play the endgame right. I could have hit Lawson and I didn’t. But I have to look my friends and neighbors in the eye when this is all over, and I couldn’t do it. Wouldn’t do it.”

  “My new boss is going
to have it in for me,” Weston smiled grimly shooting him a heavy look. “I hope the AG goes after him. I may have encouraged my friend to share his information.”

  Whatever it took. Maybe the attorney general could get something to stick.

  Elaine’s brow creased with worry. “Do I need to worry?”

  Travis shook his head. “I’m quite sure Lawson will be avoiding this part of the county unless absolutely necessary. He knows we’re onto him, and eventually he’ll slip up, if he hasn’t already.”

  Weston’s face grew tight and a muscle twitched high on his cheek. “Good news is, we only get his sorry ass for eighteen months, and I will file to run against him tomorrow. I won’t be such a nice opponent,” he said with a hard glint in his eye.

  Travis stood. “Thank you all for coming, and most importantly, for your support.” He gestured to Weston. “I have no doubt Prairie’s newest police chief will do an excellent job, and I’m committed to helping Prairie make a full comeback. Together we can make Prairie the most vibrant town in the Flint Hills.”

  A cheer went up from the small gathering.

  “Thank you, Travis, for all you’ve done for us,” Jamey Sinclaire added sincerely. Echoes of her words rippled through the group. Six months ago, he couldn’t see himself doing anything but law enforcement, but so much had changed. In spite of the loss, he felt more hopeful than ever. Complete.

  Dottie clapped her hands. “Listen up. You’ll hear it at the food truck tomorrow, but we might as well end this evening on a high note. Cass and Park have set a date. Clear your calendar three weeks from Saturday.”

  More clapping and cheers went up. Travis wrapped Elaine in his arms. “Maybe we’ll have an announcement of our own soon?” he whispered in her ear, heating at the pretty pink that tinged her cheeks when she nodded.

  Weston clapped him on the shoulders. “Think about what I said? I think it could work.”