Tide

by Lacy Sheridan

  She sighed and sat back in her chair. “Yes. I’d never seen them but I knew the Queen kept them. I never imagined she’d use them for a Trial.”

  “I’m worth risking the lives of her pets, I suppose,” I muttered.

  “That’s done,” she nudged my shoulder. “It’s a new day and a new Trial. You’ve already gotten further than most of the Court believed you would. Now please, eat something so you don’t collapse in the middle of it.” I forced down a bite of bread and plastered a smile on my face. “Good.”

  I managed a few more bites, hoping something might actually settle my stomach, and then pushed the plate away when it didn’t work. My feet itched to move, to do something. They were content to keep me waiting this morning. I hated it. “Help me get ready if they’ll let you, will you?” She nodded. “I need to be…not here.” I cast one last glance around the Nest, at the girls sitting in silence around the edges of the common area. A few looked at me, gazes unreadable.

  “Of course. Go.”

  I stood and returned to my bed, pacing between the curtain and wall. I’d barely slept the night before, tossing and turning and wondering. What did they have ready for me today? What horrors would I face?

  Would I make it out a second time?

  “Moray,” I tried in a whisper. The sprite hadn’t visited me in the Nest in days, and I hadn’t had a real chance to speak with it yesterday. I looked up and turned, searching for how it managed to get in. “Moray, are you here? Moray?”

  No answer. More likely it was with the High Court. Would they let it out of their sight, after proclaiming I had its favor in front of everybody?

  I almost turned away, but a flash caught my eye. I turned to it, sure Moray must have been slipping into the Nest, but there was no sign of the sprite.

  I moved and the flash came again—a shiny ripple in the wall above the bed. Whichever way I craned my neck I couldn’t quite see what it was. After a moment’s hesitation, I stepped onto the bed, balancing my weight, and reached with one hand to feel for what was there. A dip in the wall, so little I’d never noticed it before. I felt farther and a shock of pain jabbed through my finger. I yanked my hand back with a gasp to find a paper-thin slice welling up with blood.

  That’s a sign to leave it alone, logic reminded me, but I bounced on my toes to get a better view, curiosity boiling inside me.

  On my tiptoes, I could almost reach. A little more—I stretched as far as my legs would let me.

  I found the edge of the dip, shallow in the front, and then falling down into a wider tunnel into the wall, no bigger than a rodent could pass through. A thousand sparkling things were hidden inside. I could see the edges of jewelry and silverware and ribbons piled high, everything from cheap little trinkets to what looked like it should belong on nobles. They were carefully positioned inside so that from the floor they’d never be seen.

  Except that a knife had been left out on the edge where it could catch the light. A tiny thing, small enough to slip into a sleeve and never be seen. Both edges were sharpened, with elegant grooves that ran the length of the blade. A silver handle was inset with blue and black gems gleaming like they were winking at me.

  Moray’s stash.

  How had I never thought of it? Aven said sprites liked to collect shiny things—when we’d arrived he’d sent Moray off to its stash so we could be alone. But I’d never thought about where it might be. Or what Moray might do with it. This one was so little it must be one of many. The sprite probably had a whole system of them in the walls.

  I grinned and grabbed the knife before dropping to sit on my bed. My mind stormed with what might be coming and my insides knotted up, but I couldn’t stop smiling. I turned the knife once in my hands before I tucked it into my boot, letting myself breathe a sigh of relief. I trusted Moray. Trusted it with my life. If it had snuck a weapon to me now that meant it wouldn’t be taken from me in the Trial. And that I’d need it.

  I heard the doors of the Nest open and steeled myself before I went out to meet them. I knew it was the guards. One jerked his head at me from the threshold and I glanced to Kieras. “May she come help me dress?”

  A quick look exchanged, and then a nod. Nothing more. Kieras walked out beside me. They led us to the same small washroom I’d prepared in the day before—nothing more than a basin of water, a mirror, and a set of clothes hung on the wall. A simple, loose shirt and plain pants this time, no leathers in sight. Riding boots, taller than ones I had now. A light cloak. I changed and pulled the knife free before kicking off my boots. Kieras eyed it but didn’t comment.

  I didn’t trust those tall boots. What if it slipped too low to reach?

  My attention turned to my bandaged arm, and I set the knife down and unwrapped the long strips of cloth. “What are you doing?” Kieras asked.

  “They might take it before I start, but it’s worth a try.” I tied one strip around my calf to secure the knife, and I tugged the leg of my pants over it. There was a small bulge, but it would be invisible with the boots on. “Help me wrap it?” She nodded and did. My arm looked as it had before, and I turned to the mirror with a triumphant little smile as Kieras set to work braiding my hair again.

  I didn’t look like a warrior today. But I felt more like one.

  “Where did you get it?”

  I swallowed. “It’s probably better to keep you out of it. In case.”

  She gave a stiff nod and lowered her voice, breath brushing my ear. “Don’t hold it too tightly. Keep your grip flexible. If you can’t get away, and I suspect you won’t, aim for the eyes. It’s a dirty trick but works.”

  I blinked and met her gaze in the mirror, but she looked as if the words had never passed her lips. How did a girl sold into slavery as a child know how to fight?

  When she was finished, she sighed. “Each Trial will be harder than the last.”

  I nodded. “I know.”

  “Are you ready?”

  “I’ll never be ready, I don’t think. But I’m going anyway.”

  I saw her approving smile in the mirror. “That’s my girl. Go on. And come back.”

  I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t do four goodbyes in a row. I met her reflection’s dark eyes, deep with worry and hope, nodded once, and turned and left.

  We walked in heavy silence to the courtyard, but none of the crowds from the day before met us there. Only the High Court—no Moray, I noticed—and a handful of guards, each atop an asketi. I was guided to a mare, and once settled we set off. Nobody spoke a word. I didn’t dare break the silence.

  A guard rode on either side of me and a third behind, keeping me on the path and any thought of running out of my head. Not that I would have. This was worth more than a chance of fleeing.

  For hours we rode in silence but for the wind and the tide and the clomp of hooves. I watched Aven ahead of me and curled my fingers tight around my mare’s reins to keep from urging her toward him. Raeth looked over his shoulder, as if he knew my thoughts, but all I got was the Lord’s amused smirk.

  We rode through sparse woods and long, uneven fields as the sun rose higher, blazing down on us. A thousand times I almost asked where we were going but held my tongue. If they weren’t offering it, they wouldn’t tell me if I asked.

  My knife burned against my ankle.

  When even my light cloak had begun to feel heavy and hot, and my worries threatened to drive me out of my mind, wondering what this Trial could be, we came to a lake.

  It was large, far larger than any I’d seen in the Realm so far, a deep, idyllic blue rippling out into the distance. The sun caught on tiny white crests that rolled onto the shore with the gentle current, a different kind of beautiful than the ocean. A quiet and serene kind of power. I couldn’t take my eyes off it as the High Court dismounted and beckoned for me to do the same.

  The moment my feet hit the ground my worry tripled. A group of tidespeople were standing at the water’s edge—this Trial was not going to involve anything good. I eyed the lake as
I walked toward them, half-expecting another water hound to rise from below. None did.

  “What do you want?” I asked as I stopped in front of them. No formalities anymore, not when we were playing this game. A warning flashed in Namak’s eyes and I looked straight at him, waiting to see what he’d do.

  Reckless. Stupid. But I didn’t care.

  His lip curled, but Marassa spoke before he could do anything. “Tell me, Hania, did you enjoy your time with Lord Aven before you arrived in our Court?”

  I studied her and then Aven, trying to judge what she meant by the question. What part to play this time. But maybe there wasn’t room for parts anymore. Maybe just the truth. “I did,” I answered. Her eyes narrowed the slightest bit, but her face stayed in the same regal mask. “He taught me much about your world.”

  “Did you know that before taking his lordship he served as a warrior?”

  “Yes.”

  She smiled. “Prove to us what you’ve learned.” She gestured to the water. I turned to it but didn’t move.

  What did that mean?

  I had a sinking feeling I knew exactly what it meant. I unclasped the cloak and let it drop to the grass. My heart pounded as I crouched and unlaced my boots. A quick pat to make sure my knife was secure, and then I straightened and, taking a breath to steady my nerves, stepped into the water.

  It was cold enough to cut through the summer heat and send a wave of goosebumps. The dirt and sand sank beneath my bare feet as I made my way forward, feeling for rocks and weeds so I wouldn’t trip. It rose up my legs, my waist, sloshing in gentle waves around me.

  My chest tightened as the water rose, but I let out another slow breath, closing my eyes. Aven’s smile flashing in the sun, his hand outstretched to me. There’s no safer way to swim than with a selkie.

  He wasn’t here now—he was back on the shore, and though I didn’t look, I felt his eyes on me. He’d swept away my fear of the water like it was nothing. I didn’t need him beside me to keep that fear at bay.

  I took a deep breath and dived down.

  The water was clear, like in a painting. A jewel-blue with dreamlike slants of light filtering through it. Below me, it sank deeper and deeper, darker and darker. I brushed a few loose wisps of hair out of my vision and pushed down.

  What, of all the things Aven had taught me, was I supposed to be proving? That I wasn’t going to drown?

  The last Trial had been Cunning, a test of my ability to survive without tools or hope or escape. Strength, Honor, and Loyalty remained, and I knew that Honor and Loyalty would be the most difficult Trials. The ones that would take everything I had.

  Which left Strength.

  Swimming?

  I pushed toward the center of the lake until my chest ached, and I returned to the surface. The band that held the two gems around my neck floated up, and I was glad it wasn’t loose enough to slip over my head and float away. Shaking a strand of wet hair from my eyes, I dared a glance to shore. I was farther out than I’d thought, the High Court small in the distance. I drew in my second breath and something brushed along my churning legs. The world became a blur as I was dragged below the water.

  Panic blinded me, the water swirling as I flung my arms in every direction, trying to push myself up. Water choked down my throat. I felt the weight of whatever had clamped onto me but the cold numbed the pain. When I opened my eyes, red swirled through the water.

  I jerked my gaze down. A dark, strong shape, larger than I was and far quicker and more graceful in the water.

  Seal.

  Seal.

  Selkie.

  The Trial clicked into place with a clap of raw horror.

  I kicked with my free foot, putting all the force I could into the blow, and struck the seal’s head. Once. Twice. My spinning vision managed to find their eye and I drove my heel into it. They released me and I clawed my way to the surface.

  Air. I gulped it down, coughing, and spun one way and then the other. On the far shore, among cliffs rising to the bright sky, shadows poured into the lake like a waterfall. Seals. Dozens of them.

  I snatched for the knife with one hand, the other keeping my head above water, fumbling with the knot. “Come on, come on, please,” I whispered, eyes on where the selkies had dove into the lake. They could be anywhere. I didn’t know how many there were, and I had no hope of defending myself against them in the water. One maybe, but not this.

  The bandage loosened, slipping around my foot and into the depths of the lake, and I gripped the knife before it could follow. I doubted it would do me much good against so many, but at least it was something.

  A tail brushed against my leg and my heart jumped, but I ignored it and dove to meet the selkie. They could kill me; they were bigger, stronger, faster. They could tear me apart and pull me down and drown me. Sharp teeth flashed in the water and made me flinch, almost gasping.

  I didn’t give them the chance to attack. I plunged the blade into their flipper as soon as it was in reach and twisted. A warped sound echoed through the water, and the current rushed around me as the selkie swam for the surface. My fingers clamped tight around the handle of the blade and dragged me with them before the knife wrenched free. Blood spun through the water and stung my eyes.

  Before I could orient myself, teeth sank into my elbow, narrowly missing the water hound’s bite, and yanked. I spun and braced both feet against the selkie’s slick pelt. They twisted before I could do anything else, my sore shoulder twisting with them and the wounds from my last Trial pulling and tearing. A scream left me in a rush of bubbles and lake water forced its way down my throat.

  I kicked and fought, dragging myself around so I could look into their eyes, dark and full of hatred. I didn’t let myself think that Aven’s eyes looked so much like that when he shifted. I didn’t let myself think that these were his people. I thought of Kieras, of her whispered words. I drove the blade into one eye.

  The second my elbow was released I yanked the knife out and fought for the surface. Panting, I twisted to check my throbbing arm. The water had washed the blood away and left gruesome-looking punctures.

  Warm, slick bodies pushed against my legs. I kicked out at any in reach, but I knew it did little.

  I was supposed to prove what I’d learned. I’d learned countless things from Aven—how to fight, how to hunt, how to survive. I’d learned the exotic names of this world. I’d learned not to think I knew someone I didn’t. I’d learned about the fire his thoughts, his voice, his laugh could spark in me.

  I’d learned I wasn’t just a farmgirl.

  I touched my fingertips to the stones at my neck, closed my eyes, and went to face the selkies again.

  They reared back as I swam closer, a swarm of gray and black and brown surrounding me. Circling. Waiting. I waited, too.

  One burst forward, all teeth and muscle. I slashed at them and they fell back. Another came from the other side and I turned to meet them. My knife caught their muzzle and sent another wisp of blood curling up. Not large or deep, but enough to force them away and let another take their place.

  Another. Another. I didn’t manage to do more than nick and graze any of them, but each time my knife fell they backed off and let the next take their turn. When my chest burned, I kicked up, but one moved forward.

  They knocked me sideways through the water. I twisted and flailed to find the surface, and managed to gasp half a breath before another knocked me below again. I struck out with my knife, searching for any of them, but they danced backwards. Pushed me farther, farther, down into the water.

  No, no, no. My throat ached. My lungs strained to draw a breath I wouldn’t let them have.

  Another swipe with my knife that met only water. My fingers slipped on the metal handle.

  Silver went drifting through the water.

  My heart stopped.

  I stared, watching it float out of my reach, and then I snatched for it. It spun away, into the dark.

  Frantic, I kicked after it, pus
hing myself quicker. Quicker. Not quick enough.

  No, no, no, no, no. No!

  A seal nipped at my side, playing with me. I balled one hand into a fist and drove it into their nose. My movements were turned sluggish by the water, but the selkie backed away a few inches, and I kept swimming.

  Down. I needed that knife.

  I ignored the ache in my chest that was turning into a desperate searing. I needed air, and I needed it soon. But I needed my knife, too. I didn’t look at the selkies to see if they followed me. None dragged me to the group or overtook me, so I put them out of my mind. Arms. Legs. Down, down, down. Waving weeds greeted me and I clawed my way toward them. I churned up dirt and tiny rocks as I scrabbled for the knife, searching anywhere. Any bit of silver. The world turned into swirls of brown and blue and red.

  Dots of black crept along the edges of my vision and everything in me pushed me to breathe. Now.

  A distant, dull pain passed through my fingers. I snatched at the knife, not caring that it was blade-first. By the time I’d started to turn with it, they were back.

  The first selkie shoved me to the ground, their weight crushing me to the dirt before they let the others take their place. Water seeped through my nose and black stars popped against my eyes. The others tore at my legs, my arms, like they were wild seals ready to feast on their hard-earned prey.

  Maybe this was it. Maybe I wouldn’t last the Trials after all.

  More teeth flashed in front of me. A gaping mouth, and I knew that was it. The killing bite.

  Part of me wanted to lie there and accept it. Give in to the darkness whispering at me.

  But my fingers were tight around Moray’s knife, and the sunlit flashing of the sprite dancing through the air wavered in my mind’s eye. The feeling of Aven’s arms around me. Raeth’s rough, whispered laugh. Kieras’s arm looped around my shoulders.

  Tobin standing in the rain, staring down the invading merrows like he wasn’t young and scared. Edrick’s eyes glittering with mischief as we shared the stolen sweet roll. Isla spinning through the dancers.

  Marassa’s cold smile.