Hayden’s Haven

by Cohen, Julie K.

  LSOV, the Lupus Shifter Origination Virus, otherwise referred to as the Origination Virus, was the cause of the greatest and scariest plague in human history, worse than the Bubonic Plague. It had killed tens of thousands on three continents and created thousands of the first wolf shifters. The very fact that humans hadn’t destroyed all samples of LSOV astounded Mila, given their level of fear and paranoia when it came to shifters.

  “This is where I need your help. If you can strip out the canis lupus genome and just leave the original virus, the one that is common to both wolf and bear shifters, I might be able to use its ability to adapt to different genera. Tess and I were exposed to different versions of the SEV2. Maybe with our recombinant antigens, I can create multi-faceted T-lymphocytes and B-lymphocytes doctored with the origination virus.”

  “A vaccine that mutates to defend against a mutating virus. That’s genius, Mila!”

  Mila released a long breath. “It’s only a theory, and I’m not sure how sound of a theory. Either way, we have a lot of work in front of us, and this move. . .”

  “Don’t worry about the move. We can get as much help as we need to pack up. I know which shifters to pull off of duties elsewhere. I just have to get Damien or Hayden’s approval. We can have everything packed in an hour, three tops, and then unpack even faster.”

  The mention of Hayden’s name made Mila jumpy. Sooner or later she’d have to talk with him. She glanced through her notes. Later. Definitely later. She had to focus on the virus since that was the reason she was here in the first place. Granted, it had been her excuse to get away from her pack, but it had become her mission once she got comfortable with the idea that she could work in peace here, even be appreciated for her skills.

  Shifters everywhere needed this. Mila smiled, feeling good about herself for the first time in a long time. This could actually work.

  “You get our helpers lined up while I track down Ferguson to get a final move date and a quick tour to make sure the place is in running condition before we move everything over. The last thing we need is to overload the circuits if he didn’t account for the draw from our using several machines at once.”

  “Sounds good!”

  Mila stepped out into the cold, wondering if the temperature had risen or if her shifter abilities had finally kicked in. For the first time in weeks, she felt warm, as if the weather was closer to fifty than twenty. She didn’t even zip up her coat or put gloves on.

  As she headed past Damien’s house and down the path that led to the new lab, she felt as if someone was watching her. It wasn’t the first time she had had the feeling over the past few weeks, except this time her wolf rose within, pushing her to pay attention, to move faster, get out of the open. Her wolf was back! That stunned her, distracted her until her wolf nipped at her, again and again, to get moving.

  Mila raced down the hill and flew through the lab’s front door, slamming it closed behind her. The hollow echo of the door slamming traveled through the empty lab.

  “Anyone here?” she called out, checking to see who might still be working. No answer.

  As she ran her fingers over the clean metal counters lining the outer walls, she marveled at all the space, and how warm and quiet the lab was. And completely finished. Not a single wire lay loose. The place was better insulated than she had expected. There were no noises of kids running across a compound, or shifters calling out to one another talking about everyday events. No howls or growls from the occasional teen spat being broken up by a guard. Just quiet, solitude, and a perfectly functioning lab. As soon as Anna got the work crew together they could move everything over from the shack.

  Ferguson had outdone himself, installing a double set of doors in the foyer to cut down on heat loss and direct currents. At the far end of the building was a large fireplace, at least five feet wide and just as high. The windows all had curtains, which was a strange look for a lab, but it would cut down on drafts. The place was rather dark right now with the shades drawn. She flipped the lights. Strong workstyle lights flooded the room. Perfect. High above in the ten-foot-high ceilings were three fans positioned down the middle of the room. Mila flipped the fan switch on the wall. The fans started up, all of them rotating clockwise, slow enough to pull cool air up off the floor and push warm air down. He had actually listened to her suggestion.

  A shifter had listened to her suggestion. Imagine that.

  She and Anna had requested a storage room too, but Ferguson had built two rooms. He wouldn’t tell her what the second room was for. A surprise, nothing more, he had said. She couldn’t wait for Anna. Mila headed into the mystery room and flipped the light.

  Tears clouded her vision. It was a combination kitchenette and bedroom, with two beds. Her name was carved over one and Anna’s over the other. Maybe Ferguson didn’t realize she didn’t have far to go to get to Aloe’s or that she wouldn’t be pulling 48 hours shifts like when she was an intern, but it was sweet, really sweet.

  The lights went out. So much for being ready to move in. Last-minute glitches were expected but she couldn’t afford to have the power fail in the middle of certain experiments. She’d have to check with Ferguson. Maybe ask about installing a backup generator. Yes, that would be crucial. And Kate said there was enough money to pay for whatever they needed.

  The kitchen/bedroom didn’t have any windows, and with the curtains drawn in the main work area, the inside was practically pitch dark. Her wolf gave a haughty signal, as if to say she could see just fine.

  Maybe her wolf could, but her eyesight in human form wasn’t as good as most shifters.

  The front door clicked shut. Mila froze. Footsteps approached. That feeling of having been watched suddenly made sense.

  “Mila?”

  The lights came back on. There stood Hayden by the front door. Relief flooded her. Her mind had been playing tricks on her again.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, suddenly on alert. His bones were moving beneath his skin, as if he were resisting a shift. He must have sensed her fear.

  “I’m fine. I just got scared when the lights went out.”

  He flipped the switch twice. “They seem fine.”

  “Someone else must have seen them on from outside and shut them without realizing I was in the backroom.”

  Hayden stopped looking around as if there was a predator about, but he was tense, jumpy even. Probably because he was with her. And yet despite—or maybe because of—all the awkwardness, she wanted to go to him and hold him.

  “I’ll be going then.” Hayden opened the inner door.

  “Wait!”

  He glanced over his shoulder.

  That look in his eyes. . . was it hope? Please let him not be mad at me.

  “Were you looking for me?” she asked, as she thrust her hands behind her so he wouldn’t see her fidgeting with the hem of her sweater.

  “I, ah, wanted to see if Fergusson finished the lab.”

  “He did a fabulous job.”

  “Yes, he did.”

  Hayden’s words weren’t cold exactly, but something was definitely off about him. If she was going to stay with Damien’s pack, they’d need to learn to get along, not always running away from each other.

  “Why don’t you come in and take a look. I mean, you might as well see the project you started.”

  His hesitation was clear, but Hayden finally released the inner door and entered. Granted, the lab was rather sparse without their equipment, but the space itself was quite impressive.

  Dark eyes stayed trained on her until he stood before her.

  No, her Hayden wasn’t distracted. He was completely focused on her, except his body remained tense before her. He folded his arms across his chest, creating a barrier. His body language said enough.

  It was time to be brave, to be the independent shifter she’d sought to be for most of her life

  “I’m sorry, Hayden.” She reached up to cup his cheek, and his hand caught her wrist, like a steel vice.

>   Then he stepped in so close she could smell his scent as she never smelled it before. She had always thought he smelled like spring water, but that was only the surface, the scent her human side could scent. There were so many layers to Hayden that she could smell now. Beneath the spring water was the delicate honeysuckle layer interwoven with strands of ash, like from a bonfire. Just like Hayden, a mixture of sweet and fire wrapped in a calming layer of water.

  “You have nothing to be sorry for,” he said, his voice deep, serious, almost wolf-like. Black eyes intensified.

  Heat spread through her, even before he backed her against a counter. “I ran when I should have stayed. Then I left you with those shifters who wanted to hurt you. Again, I should have stayed, spoken up for you.”

  “And get injured in the process? What type of shifter would I have been to allow that?”

  “It’s not your job to protect me,” she said as he released her wrist only to kiss the tender flesh where he had pressed a tad too hard. That kiss was tender, erotic, and way too tempting. And damn confusing. She lowered her arm, not sure what to do.

  A low growl vibrated from his chest, but he didn’t bare his teeth. Hayden wasn’t angry with her, but he was angry. Her wolf nipped and whimpered inside, pushing her to do something to help him, but what?

  She reached up to the glistening droplets of water in his hair from the snow that had melted and brushed them back, except she couldn’t force her hand to stop. The need to touch was instinctive. Her fingers glided through his thick, wavy hair. His growl intensified.

  “Please don’t growl,” she whispered as the growl sliced through her to a place where she shoved the bad memories.

  He stopped immediately, and his face relaxed. He didn’t know, he hadn’t realized what he had been doing. “Who hurt you, Mila?” he asked, eyes soft as they watched her closely.

  She shrugged. “It doesn’t matter now, does it.”

  “You matter. Everything about you matters. And it’s my job to protect you, not the other way around. That’s how this works.”

  “This? What exactly is this, Hayden? We’re both hiding things from one another, we don’t talk, we don’t need one another. A relationship must be more than attraction and lust.”

  “There are things in my past that you won’t like,” he said as he ran his hand down her arm, creating a hypnotic effect as he dragged the tip of his forefinger back and forth. His touch felt so good, magical, as it always did.

  Mila eased herself against his chest and simply breathed him in for a minute. “I guess we share something after all.” Tentatively his arms enveloped her, bringing her more than his sweet warmth, but a feeling of being wanted, maybe even loved. Her mind was playing tricks on her again. A shifter like her didn’t end up with a strong shifter like Hayden. It just didn’t happen.

  Hayden took a deep breath. “I can be demanding, focused at times, to the point I don’t always listen to others. I didn’t. . . I mean, I hope I didn’t. . . Did I force you, Mila?”

  She smiled, as she cupped his cheek. “Hayden, I loved every minute with you.”

  Dark brows knit together. It wasn’t the answer he had expected, and he didn’t seem entirely pleased either. “You ran.”

  “Not from you.” Never from you. “There are times I flashback to my past. But you’re right. I shouldn’t have run.”

  “Will you tell me about whoever it was that hurt you?” he asked. His face was an odd mixture of pain, regret, and hope.

  She had never talked about Vance to anyone after she had gone to her alpha for help. Truman said he’d talk with Vance. And he had. That had been the reason for the beating she received later that night. She never went back to Truman after that. Or anyone else. She had delved into research more at that point, especially since it justified her going to town to use the computer. Vance had assigned a guard to her by then, but Nash hadn’t watched what she was doing online. She’d taken the opportunity to continue talking with Kate via encoded emails and researching ways to get away.

  “Vance was sweet, nice, strong. . . everything a woman wants in a shifter. That’s how it started out. The first time he hit me, I tried to leave. That made it worse.”

  She swallowed hard. This wasn’t something she wanted to talk about, yet Hayden was right. There’d been enough secrets.

  “I wasn’t what he wanted, so he took it out on me. I went to my alpha, but Truman. . . I don’t know if he didn’t care or was too weak to stand up to Vance. I ran, Hayden. I mean, the moment I received the email from Kate begging for help, I ran. I’d been planning to for a while, but I was so scared after what had happened the first time I’d tried to run that I couldn’t do it.

  “But Kate was hurt, so I didn’t have a chance to think about the risk to me. When Kate asked me to contact Damien and ask for his enforcer, I took advantage of the opportunity. I contacted Damien under false pretenses. I had been working on the virus, but I could have continued working on it there at my pack. I said I was close to a vaccine because I needed to make myself seem more valuable, so he’d take me in, protect me.”

  “Hell, Mila. Damien would have allowed you to stay just because you needed it.”

  “Will he kick me out when you tell him the truth? That I left without my alpha allowing it? That I wasn’t close to developing a vaccine? I mean, I’m working on it still, but I lied to him, to you, to everyone.”

  “You don’t have to earn a place here, Mila. You just have to be yourself.”

  That was perhaps the sweetest thing anyone had ever said to her. She fought back the tears. “I know that now, at least I think I do. I mean, I’m contributing something, so my past doesn’t matter at this point.”

  Strong hands smoothed down her arms, then pulled away as he slid his nose along her neck, scenting her. “I don’t want to hurt you,” he whispered in her ear.

  “You can’t. It’s not in your nature,” she whispered in his, adding a nip to his earlobe. That earned her the most decadent growl, a promise from an aroused male.

  “I’m a white wolf.” His nose was running down her neck toward her breasts, but his hands remained plastered at his side.

  As plain as day, she could see the shifter inside, and she knew, with every fiber of her being, that he would never hurt her. “I know you, Hayden. You won’t harm me.”

  His mouth captured hers, sending a gentle spark through her. Nothing like the wildfire that had nearly consumed her at Aloe’s. This kiss had depth, like a slow-burning candle. The spark spread to her entire body, fast, bringing with it a need so deep she wasn’t sure she knew how to confront it, give it what it needed—what she needed. Her hand slipped under his shirt, lifted, removed the fabric that kept her from touching, licking, nipping at his flesh.

  Her tongue flicked over a nipple and his entire body moved with a growl that was deep, rich, possessive. Her wolf howled from within. Mila shucked her coat, top, and bra until she was as bare on top as he was. He palmed one breast, then pulled her to him forcefully, trying to take control. She didn’t need to look to her wolf to know what she wanted. Her wolf had been trapped, alone for months. Mila hadn’t even given her a chance to run after the bridge between them had been repaired. Her wolf had never had the chance to emerge around a strong wolf, but here and now, it felt safe to do so. She wanted to use her power, to feel strong again, if even for a short while.

  Mila shoved Hayden back, surprising him. Concern lit his face at first.

  “Right now, you’re mine, Hayden.” She plastered her mouth over his, let their tongues entangle as she worked his pants, unfastening them, then pushing them down.

  Just as he reached for her pants, she slid down his torso until his cock was in front of her face. Her tongue flicked the bulbous tip, then swirled along the head. Another stroke of her tongue along the side, the base, the top, all over. She wanted to learn everything there was, every nuance of Hayden, especially what he craved.

  This was a moment for her wolf and Hayden both, a chance t
o give them something each needed. Dominance, power, acceptance.

  “Come to me, Hayden.”

  His hips pushed forward slightly, easing himself into her mouth. Lavishing his cock, taking him into her mouth was to connect to both her wolf and—if he’d let her—to Hayden.

  Two strong hands sifted through her hair as she eased on and off of him, taking him further each time. His hard cock was silky, powerful, and addictive. Her hands dug into his ass as she pulled him in deeper until he struck the back of her throat. A particularly erotic moan escaped his lips, making her pussy gush. Another growl, the sound of him scenting her arousal and just like that he took control, pumping into her. His hands fisted in her hair. Suddenly her pussy tightened on nothing, squeezing tight as an orgasm ripped through her. Her mouth clamped down around his cock causing him to spill in her.

  “Lick me off.”

  An order? A request? Or him knowing what she needed, what she wanted? Mila pulled off, laving his cock and swirling around the head. He was still hard, and she couldn’t quite pull away. Being on her knees before him, knowing she could drive him wild had been too much fun and she wanted more. As she took him in her mouth again, he growled.

  She was being hurled through the air, landing on her back atop the worktable as he stripped her boots, pants, and panties off of her in seconds.

  She could see her reflection in those black pools that had targeted her. At that moment, she never felt more protected and safe, knowing that he’d let nothing happen to her.

  “Open,” he growled.

  “No,” she said, the desire to play with him had emerged, though she wasn’t sure why. Ah. . . her wolf was causing trouble. She hadn’t seen that side of her wolf in a long time. . . since before Vance. Her wolf knew Hayden was safe to tease.

  “You’re mine.” He fought to get the words out. Was he battling his wolf? It was hard to say, but whatever gripped Hayden now, she wasn’t ready to give in. She needed to push him, push him to the breaking point. Then she’d know for sure that no matter what, he’d fight for her, never let her down.