How Does a Moment Last Forever?
Page 6
Thank God they relocated to the bathroom. I managed to sneak out without being seen and all the way home I couldn’t stop replaying the memory.
The following day Zane returned home. I’d spent the night before in my own heightened sense of pleasure, exploring my whole body in a way I hadn’t since before I was married.
I felt light and carefree despite what my husband had been up to during his illicit night away.
Dancing around my kitchen with abandon, I sang at the top of my voice, and finally spotted him spying on me. My heart thumped. He was and still is the sexiest man I’ve ever met. That smile of his could melt a thousand hearts of ice.
“Are you going to come in and kiss me, or what?” I remember saying, a little coquettishly.
He didn’t waste any time and rushed to me, kissing me with passion that was also tender to the touch.
I was vaguely aware of the loud music, but such was the intensity of our embrace, it didn’t bother me, or pull me out of the erotic mood I’d fallen into.
Returning his kiss with more a forceful push, I could feel his growing cock pressed against me.
“I’ve missed you,” I told him, and it wasn’t a lie said in the moment. Shedding my clothes seductively, I wanted to hold him in my own spell. I could see how excited it made him. I flicked my tongue over the tip of his cock. All mine.
I pushed him back onto the table, standing above him my feet on either side of his hips. Dropping seductively, I teased him. Dropping again, I knew how much he wanted to be inside me.
Control was addictive. He tried to get up, but I pressed him down with my stilettoed foot. I didn’t give him permission to move.
I wanted Zane to need me, to want me more than anything, or anyone else. He was right where I wanted him to be.
The control was still mine.
“I want to see you play with your cock.”
He did as he was told, but I knew by his erratic breathing, he was close.
“Slow down,” I ordered. “I want to see how long you can last.”
My husband’s hard cock was a sight to behold. Not only was it long, but thick and veiny too. I wanted it in my mouth again. But, I had another surprise for him, sliding my fingers inside him.
He gasped and tried to pull away. He didn’t want me to see he enjoyed having his arse played with.
“Stay there,” I said, massaging his hole with my fingers.
“Can I cum?” he asked.
“Yes,” I said, but I wanted to watch.
Zane – This was a moment that sticks in my mind, and Jenna is correct. I didn’t want her to see me enjoying arse play, but she has a way of getting what she wants, and it felt good. It still does.
Chapter Fifteen
I remember the first time I was officially introduced to Chad.
There was no getting around the fact; he was a bona fide God. Totally gorgeous, and I felt a little jealous I was never going to experience his touch. I imagined it many times. I was honest with Chad later on and he found it amusing but refused to be drawn on whether he’d have been with the two of us sexually, if I’d pushed for it that is.
He’d obviously made a pact with the devil. Features as fine as his were a gift. Appearing years younger than he was, he could have passed for twenty-one. Tanned. His blond hair was held back by his sunglasses, the body flawless, impeccably dressed, perfect teeth, and that accent. Wow. If I wasn’t a married woman, he would have been on my radar.
It was interesting to see Zane’s reaction to us together. Both tried to play it cool, but the electricity between them was plain for anybody to see.
I played the perfect wife, enjoying the fact I held all the cards. Neither of them would have won an Oscar for Best Actor. However, both would have been nominated for a Razzie.
Hurrying them on their way, I made a point of kissing Chad on the cheek, taking in his expensive scent. He smelt as delicious as he looked.
I’m not proud of this, but I’d installed a tracker on Zane’s phone. Wanting to know where he was heading, I grabbed my laptop and logged in.
I was in spy mode again. The danger of sneaking around heightened each time I had to do it. I liked it. I felt like a different person. Free of all responsibility, able to do what I pleased and when.
There was only one thing for it, the kids had to go to my parents’. Of course, neither party would object, but I felt a little guilty off-loading my girls whilst I pretended to be Jane Bond.
A few hours later I checked the tracker and discovered where my husband was. He was at the place I’d least expect him to be -- Coastal Way.
What’s there? I’d soon find out, but in my haste, I’d forgotten one thing – I couldn’t follow my husband and his ‘Mister’ in my own car. I’d be spotted within minutes.
My new look consisted of a dark wig, deep red lips, darker make up tones and large sunglasses.
I called into my friend’s house and asked if I could borrow her car for the evening. Of course, she was suspicious, as I would be.
"I'll explain everything tomorrow, I promise." I winked at her.
“You better,” she said. I told her we were trying role play as a way to spice up our marriage. “Kinky bitch,” was her reply.
If only she knew how kinky things had got.
Chapter Sixteen
This was the night my life went into free fall.
The games I’d been playing had backfired and knocked the wind out of my sails
I discovered why my husband was there, and had great pleasure in watching, even filming it with my mobile phone.
I was surrounded by guys playing with their cocks, enjoying the show. Groans could be heard if I listened close enough. This was a whole new world I had stepped into, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to step away from it.
Once again, Zane took a pounding from Chad. It was the hottest thing I’d ever seen, and I was only looking through my phone’s camera. I couldn’t wait to get home and watch it on the big screen television.
Chad thrust like a wild animal until he was spent.
Then came the three words I’d heard before, but this time there was real emotion behind them.
I love you.
Three tiny words we have all uttered at one time or another, but now, they smashed my world apart.
The following day, I was bereft.
How could I have been so stupid? I asked myself.
If I'd told my husband when I discovered his affair, instead of behaving like a rampant bitch, maybe we could have put our marriage back on track and I wouldn’t be feeling this way.
I did something I wasn’t proud of and found myself at Chad’s house. This was the day I blew his marriage to smithereens.
I truly believe my decision to involve Melissa was the catalyst that resulted in Chad’s death and wish I could step back in time and change what I did.
As I said earlier, I had my own reasons for telling Melissa, hoping she would tether her husband to her side and my marriage could breathe for a little while then recover. It wasn’t what happened as you all know.
This part is hard to write as Zane has no idea, and he will be devastated by this revelation.
Days after the accident, I decided I had to see Chad, just one last time, so seeking permission, I walked into the morgue, his body already prepared for viewing.
Sobbing, I looked down at his broken body and told him how sorry I was for leading him to this end. Would he forgive me? I want to believe he would have.
I looked beyond the signs of autopsy, having seen thousands over the years. This was Chad. The man we all loved.
Even in death, he had a beauty about him, a serenity, and considering the trauma of his death, a look of peacefulness.
I wanted him to open his eyes and speak to me, tell me all was as it should be, that he was where he was supposed to be, and that he didn’t hate me, but death had claimed him and forever more, he would sit amongst the other beautiful angels, watching over us.
I kissed him
goodbye, not able to pull the cover over his face. This way, he was just asleep.
Zane - This was a shock. I hadn’t been able to face visiting the morgue or Chapel of Rest, and while I’m not surprised Jenna went to pay her final respects, a part of me is jealous she got to say that last goodbye. Maybe if I had pulled my head out of my arse sooner than I did, I could have done the same, but I’m fortunate to remember Chad as he was and not the empty shell left behind.
Rightly so, Melissa tore more than a strip from me. I didn’t like being put in my place, but she was right. You reap what you sow in this life and I am testament to that.
I felt like I was stuck in quicksand and screamed out my frustrations and anger. I’d made so many mistakes and would have been better off admitting defeat, walking away from Zane and our marriage, but I suppose my pride stopped me. He was mine. I loved him. He loved me. We could survive the devastation and be happy again. I was lucky. We were lucky. We were able to put it behind us and move on to some degree, but Melissa didn’t even get a slither of happiness from the fallout.
I felt foolish for the first time since this started and calculatedly plotted my revenge. He would soon be aware how much I knew and would suffer, just like Melissa and I were. I changed my mind and retreated to my bed. The girls went to Mama’s, and when Zane did get home, I made my excuses, not having the strength to deal with him. But, the time would come.
Zane cooked dinner that night, but I didn’t have the stomach for it, and he’d cooked everything he knew I loved. Creep!
Mamma came to the rescue and gladly agreed to look after the girls for a few days, so I could recover from the migraine. I felt guilty lying to her, but I had a plan and it had to be just me and Zane for it to work.
I cooked up a storm and settled down with my husband, under the pretence I’d lent a movie from Ellie. We would be watching a movie, but more of the home-made variety than any Hollywood blockbuster.
He was dangerously close to falling into my trap. I can’t really remember how I felt to be honest. Was I making a mistake? I didn’t know for sure, but we were about to find out.
Chapter Seventeen
Zane turned white when he finally realised what we were watching. He didn’t know what to say or do. Would any of us, if placed in the same situation? He was caught red handed and the video evidence was more than enough to convict him and ensure he didn’t try and lie his way out of trouble.
I remember slapping his face at some point that evening. He deserved that, and much more. But what did I deserve for my own deception? Something, I agree, but I wouldn’t be held to task that day.
Little did I know, but across town, Chad was fighting to save his marriage.
I couldn’t sleep and sat in the kitchen, defiantly smoking a cigarette, knowing it would annoy him, and it did. We had words, nasty, spiteful words, but it was inevitable.
I wanted to frighten him and let him know how it felt to feel not in control of one’s own life, so played my trump card. I was going to Chad’s to confront him.
Zane and I have spoken since and he will openly tell you if asked that it was the most frightening part – not knowing how wife and lover would react toward one another.
He tried to stop me from going, but I was determined.
I arrived at Chad’s and be damned, he beat me to it. It still irks me to this day. He must have driven like Lewis Hamilton.
Now, public displays are not usually my thing, but I had fire in my belly and I felt like I had to fight for what was mine, and I would do it to the death.
Zane and I had words outside Chad’s house.
Just then, the front door opened, and Chad was there, wearing grey jogging bottoms and a white vest.
“Zane,” he asked, a confused look on his face. His eyes darted back and forth from me to Zane. “What’s going on?”
“Don’t you dare speak to my husband like you don’t have a clue,” I yelled, charging toward Chad.
I’m not a violent person per se, but believe human beings are capable of the worse acts when pushed beyond their limits.
I knew I was hurting, but a small part of me chipped away at me from the inside saying it’s your own fault.
Chad remained calm which only helped to fuel the rage inside me and before I knew it, I was yelling like a banshee for the whole world to hear. Then I didn’t care, but looking back now, I am mortified I behaved in such an undignified manner.
"Please, can we talk about this calmly?" he said, pleading. “Come inside.”
I wasn’t in the mood to be sweet talked.
"And all the while you were sniffing round my husband like a dog in heat,” I screamed.
“If you say so,” he said, dismissively.
That was as much as Chad needed to say to light the touch paper and without warning, I slugged him right in the nose. Blood poured out of his nose, and although I’d been to medical school, the sight of flowing blood is not my favourite thing in the world. I stepped back and suddenly dropped to my knees, feeling every ounce of strength leave my body. What had I done? I vomited all over the path and then, before I could try and stop myself, all the anguish and heartbreak spilled out of me. I heard the terrible noises, but it took a few seconds to realise the noises I could hear were coming from me.
Chad used his vest to try and stem the flow of blood, and even in that state, I couldn’t help but notice how amazing his body was. I questioned my own sanity right there and then.
Zane tried to comfort me, but that was the last thing I wanted, or needed. So, I pushed him away and struggled to my feet.
Feeling re-energised, I charged at Chad again. This time, he kept his silence, which upon reflection was a good thing.
Zane approached me and told me he’d take me home, and I allowed him to lead me away. I was soon stopped in my tracks.
“When will I see you again?” Chad asked Zane.
It was like I’d been plugged into the mains. Feeling the surge of rage once again, I twisted around and charged up the path, standing toe to toe with Chad.
“He’s mine,” I screamed, “And there’s nothing you can do about it.”
Chad looked deep into my eyes, not blinking and calmly replied, “If you were so sure of that, you wouldn’t be here now.”
Zane - For those of you who’ve seen Clash of the Titans, you’ll get the analogy. Both Jenna and Chad powerful in their own way, more than capable of toppling one another.
It wasn’t a scenario I’d played through my mind – too arrogant to believe this day would ever come. I thought I was too clever and I’d covered my tracks well, but Jen was always half a step behind us both.
If you knew my wife personally, you’d see she is the kind of person who devotes her life to helping others. I didn’t know what to do when she hit Chad. I knew she was capable of defending herself if the need arose, but this battle-ready version of my wife didn’t sit comfortably with me at all. It wasn’t the woman I’d married, but the mess I’d created, had in effect, created this hardened version before me.
To my dismay, Chad stood his ground, egging her on, pulling the rage from her, manipulating her with carefully chosen words. He knew what he was doing. I know because we spoke about it once our friendship was established. He felt he had to fight for what he truly believed to be his, and despite me telling him I wasn’t in love with him, he never did believe me and stood toe to toe with who he saw as his rival for my affections. Crazy, but I was planted firmly between the two. Still, whether I was in denial of my feelings for him, I wasn’t going to destroy the mother of my children in front of him or anybody. He was naïve to believe otherwise. We spoke about that too.
Chapter Eighteen
Have you ever had that feeling? You know the one. When you’re fighting so hard to control your temper, your fists are clenched as tight as they will go, and your fingernails are digging into the palms of your hands? That’s how I felt right then. I wanted to tear him apart. How dare he stand there and speak to me like that.
/>
“I’m here now because I read your text message,” I replied.
“So?” He was beyond flippant.
“He doesn’t love you,” I shouted. “Don’t you get that?”
“And you’re sure of that? You don’t know the half of it,” he taunted. When somebody is exceptionally good looking, any smugness is magnified a thousand times, and right then, he could have been the most beautiful man on the planet, but to me, he was ugly in every way. “I know everything. The hotels, the dogging sites...” I caught the look on Zane’s face, but to my surprise Chad only laughed.
I clenched my fists even tighter.
“What?” Zane said.
“You heard me,” I hissed. I felt immense pleasure at that moment. He wasn’t the only one who could sneak about.
“And you let us carry on?” Chad added. “You don’t deserve him.”
“Chad, shut it,” Zane warned. “Don’t speak to my wife like that.”
So, you will still defend me? “Deserve him,” I cried. “I let it go on and told myself it would be okay. If you made him happy, we’d be happy again -- and we were happy. It was just sex. So what? Zane was still mine, and the girls would still have their Daddy. But, no, it wasn’t enough for you.” I pointed my finger accusingly. “You couldn’t just have that one part of him.”
“I love him,” Chad said. I felt a twinge of sadness for him, but I laughed, right in his face.
“But he doesn’t love you,” I said, hoping he would feel as much hurt as I did right then. “He loves me, and you can’t do a thing about it.”
“I don’t believe that,” Chad replied.
“Are you truly that arrogant to think a big cock is all it takes to win his heart?”
“I know he loves me too.”
My husband’s silence annoyed me. Usually, he couldn’t keep his mouth shut, so why was he struck dumb now? “Don’t you have anything to say, Zane?”