Nobody Said It’d be Easy
Page 12
“Hey, Cocoa-Pop. How you feeling?”
“Daddy.” Her voice was tight.
“What’s wrong?”
She shook her head. She couldn’t even look at him. “I need to go home, Daddy.” And then gasped. “Emmy?”
“She’s with Lia. Come on now. I got you.” He wrapped an arm around her, collected her stuff, signed her out, and finally got her to the SUV. She curled into the passenger seat while he fastened her seat belt. As he drove, he reached a hand out for hers and she gripped it hard for the rest of the ride. When they got home, he scooped her up into his arms like she was still Emmy’s age, but she squeaked.
“Daddy. I can walk.”
He hesitated only a moment and put her on her feet.
Lia pulled open the front door before they reached it…and just took over. “Come on, sweetie. Lie here.”
Gabe watched Lia lead Kimberly to the couch, cover her with a blanket and run to his kitchen where she took a towel out of a pan of steaming hot water, wrung it out using his barbecue tongs and wrapped it in plastic. She wrapped that inside in a second thick towel and pressed it to Kimberly’s middle.
“Better?” she asked.
Kimberly closed her eyes and moaned. “Yeah. The heat feels good.”
His stomach twisted. “Aw, honey. I’m sorry.” He dropped to his knees, brushed the hair from her face. Did cramps really hurt this bad? Was that normal? Did women endure this every month? He tried to remember Janey’s periods but he honestly couldn’t remember her complaining about this level of pain. He looked at Lia for help but she was reading her phone’s screen. When she saw his face, she quickly put the phone away and spoke to Kim.
“Are you wearing something right now, sweetie?”
Kim’s eyes darted to his and back to Lia’s. “Um, the nurse gave me this really big pad but it feels like Emmy’s diaper.”
She made a disgusted face and Gabe’s heart hurt. Janey should be here for this. Wait. Emmy!
“Emmy’s asleep.” Lia answered his unspoken question.
Kimberly made a choking sound. “Lia. It’s really a lot,” she whispered.
“Okay. We’ll fix you up. Are you okay here by yourself for a few minutes?”
“Why? Where are you going?” Panic tainted her voice.
Lia ran a hand down Kimberly’s hair. “I’m going to borrow your daddy for just a few minutes and then we’ll be back, okay?”
Kimberly nodded but looked scared.
Helpless, Gabe watched her pale face twist into a grimace. She rubbed and pressed on her lower abdomen. Suddenly, Lia’s hand was on his arm, tugging him out of the apartment, jerking him out of his thoughts. “Gabriel. Come with me. She’ll be okay for a few minutes. Emmy will be up soon so we don’t have a lot of time. Come with me now.”
He didn’t want to leave Kimberly, but he needed to trust Lia, needed to know she’d know what to do because he absolutely didn’t. He followed Lia back to her apartment and up the stairs to the bathroom with the big claw-foot tub.
From the wastebasket beside her sink, she removed boxes of feminine products. “It’s a good thing I forgot to take these to the curb. How do you feel about tampons?”
His jaw fell open. Feel about them? He did his best never to think about them, let alone develop feelings for them.
“Do you know how to work these?” She unwrapped one, held it out.
He stared it like it might bite. Hell, no, he didn’t know how to work them. This was supposed to be Janey, not him, God, not him. Lia huffed in frustration and guided him to toilet, pushing him down, shoving the unwrapped tampon into his hand.
“Honestly, Gabriel. This is all perfectly natural. I know this is hard for you, but it really is okay.”
No. No, it wasn’t okay. Kimberly was writhing in pain on the sofa just when she needed her mommy the most and he was having a damn nervous breakdown. He swallowed hard and stared at the small plastic cylinder in his hand.
And swallowed again. Hard.
“Gabriel, look at me.” Lia grabbed his hand. “If your wife were still alive, if she were here right now, do you really think you wouldn’t be right there with them the second she told you your daughter was hurting and frightened?”
He flinched and jerked his hand away, but Lia’s words arrowed straight to his heart. He could imagine it, could see it all perfectly in his head. He shut his eyes, let it play out. The school would have called Janey first because she was closer. Janey would have called him immediately. They’d have cursed at how fast their baby girl was growing up. They would have laughed at their own embarrassment.
And he would have been on his way home with ice cream and maybe a new movie to watch.
“You’re right,” he admitted after a minute. He lifted his eyes, not surprised to find Lia smiling down at him. “Okay. You’re right. If Janey were here right now, I’d pretty much be doing—”
“Exactly what you are doing.”
“Yeah.” He managed half a laugh. “Okay.” He ran a hand over his face. “I can do this.”
“Of course you can.” Lia put her hands on his shoulders. “This is biology. That’s all. Simple biology. Your daughter needs you. She’s scared and she’s miserably uncomfortable and you’re going to help her through this.”
He was miserably uncomfortable too. But he ruthlessly shoved it all away. Kimberly needed him. He examined the tampon Lia had pressed into his hand.
“Okay. Right. Um. So, I know this is supposed to go…inside. But it’s plastic so I don’t—” He shook his head.
“This is an applicator. The tampon is inside it. Press the plunger.”
He did and a small wad of cotton on a string emerged from the plastic cylinder and spots appeared in front of his eyes. Somebody groaned and it took him like ten full seconds to realize it was him.
“Do you have any objections to these?”
God, yes! He objected to all of this. Every minute of it. Objection, objection, objection!
“Gabriel, are tampons are okay with you?”
He blinked. He heard the words she said, but they just weren’t making sense. “Some parents have…objections to tampons because they’re worn internally.”
He started to nod but stopped when her meaning finally clicked. “Oh.” He rolled his shoulders. “No. No objections. It’s up to her. Her body. Whatever she decides.”
Lia smiled at him and nodded. “Okay. Come on.” She grabbed the packages and then led him to her bedroom.
He halted near her bed while Lia rummaged through a drawer in her dresser.
“These will be a bit large for Kimberly, but it shouldn’t be a big deal. I used to buy cheap pairs because the leaks almost never wash out.” She handed him two pairs of plain white underwear.
Leaks. He collapsed onto her bed, took some deep breaths, and found himself extraordinarily angry. “Christ, Lia. I’ve never, not once, ever regretted not having sons but I gotta tell you, I don’t know how to help with girl problems. If this were voice cracking or—or erections, I could help. You just, you know, carry notebooks and wear long shirts and think about grandmothers—” Gabe broke off when it suddenly dawned on him that he was talking about erections with a tenant while holding a tampon in his hand. He made a sound much like that of a cat choking on its own fur.
“Gabriel, you wear barrettes in your hair and nail polish on your fingers. I’ve never known a guy better able to help with girl problems than you. But can I give you some advice?”
“God, yes.” He all but fell to his knees at her feet.
“Don’t think of this is a girl problem. In fact, don’t treat this as a problem at all. It’s a normal, healthy, biological process. If you wig out on her, she’s going distrust you. And if she distrusts you, she’ll pull away from you.”
Yeah. He was wigging out.
Her arms came around him, soft and gentle, like everything else about her. Before he could think about what he was doing, his arms banded around her like she was the primary support o
n one of those structures he used to scale. He shut his eyes and buried his face against her middle. She ran her hands up and down his back and he sighed, wishing he could stay there forever, wishing he wasn’t alone in this.
After a minute, he lifted his face and whispered, “Okay. I should go…um, not fuck this up.”
“Come on,” she said, stepping out of his arms. “I’ll be right there if you need me.”
Need her?
He was suddenly afraid he’d never be able to stop.
*
Lia left Gabriel’s apartment after reassuring both father and daughter they’d be just fine. Kimberly was comfortably resting with a heating pad, a dose of ibuprofen for her cramps, and well stocked with supplies. Gabriel, while not exactly comfortable, was…dealing, she supposed. She’d promised she’d find him a list of gynecologists because yes, it was time for an examination, especially if Kimberly was in this much pain.
She unlocked her front door, tossed her keys to the coffee table and collapsed on the sofa, nibbled on her thumbnail.
She’d kissed Gabriel Ivers.
She’d replayed it all day. Even now, her lips tingled when she thought about it, about him. Oh, boy. This was bad. Very, very bad. He loved his wife and missed her so much. How could she even think about trying to fill that void?
And she was thinking. What she was thinking had her belly flipping, her pulse racing, and her anxiety levels red-lining.
She needed Roseann. She pulled out her cell, hit the contact.
“Hey, you.”
“Ro. I screwed up.”
“What? What’s wrong?” Roseann’s tone instantly changed.
“I kissed him. Gabriel.”
“The Super Man? You hussy.”
“Jesus, Ro. He’s in love with his wife. I’m…oh, God. I’m worse than Candi-with-an-I.”
“You are not. First of all, Gabriel’s wife is gone, Lia. Second, has it occurred to you that maybe it’s time? Maybe he needs to move on and you’re exactly what he needs?”
“I want to be. I…I really like this guy, Roseann. He is pretty amazing.”
“Then stop freaking out. Just go with it. See where it takes you.”
“But Janey—”
“Stop,” Roseann cut her off. “Don’t compare. You’re you, Lia. You don’t need to become her, be better than her, or even resemble her. You are what caught his eye. Just keep being you, okay?”
Lia took a deep breath and felt the tension ease. “You know, there are some days I kind of wish I could bottle you and sell you to the mental health industry. Best Friend Therapy.”
“Gee. Thanks.”
She laughed. “I meant that as a compliment, Ro.”
“I repeat. Gee. Thanks. Are you good now?”
“I’m getting there.” Guilt kicked Lia in the gut. “Hey. How are you doing? Ever since I moved, it’s been the Solve Lia’s Problem Show. I haven’t bothered to check in with you. See how you’re doing.”
Silence answered her.
“That good, Ro?”
“It’s…complicated, Lia.”
“Guy, parents, or work?”
“Two out of three.”
Oh boy. “Want to talk about it?”
Roseann sighed. “My parents have joined forces. As they presented the case to me, I’m not getting any younger and they would like grandchildren. Therefore, they want me to meet this guy that they think is perfect for the job.”
Stunned, Lia sat on her sofa with her mouth open. “Um. Wow.”
“Yeah.”
“And you said what?”
“I said okay,” Roseann admitted and then cursed. “I’m thirty years old and they still have this way of making me feel like I deserve to go to bed without dessert. What is so wrong with being choosy?”
“Nothing. And you’re not choosy. You’re cautious and I happen to think that’s smart.”
“Exactly!” Roseann said. “Would you call my mom and tell her that?”
Laughing, Lia agreed. “So when do you meet Mr. Wonderful?”
“Friday. We’re meeting for coffee.”
“Friday,” Lia repeated, mentally running through her schedule. “Okay, we’ll do the standard drill. Text me his picture. Call me, keep the line open. Remember the codes?”
“Of course I do. I came up with them. Now I have to figure out what to wear. Friday is dress-down day. Do I, in fact, dress down, which could be perceived as not giving a crap? Or do I dress up, which could be perceived as—”
“Desperate?”
“You’re right. Dress down it is.”
Once they had a plan in place, Lia ended the call, gathered her hair into a ponytail and settled in with her laptop. She’d been so caught up in Gabriel and his family today, she’d let her work slide. She needed food, so she took the laptop to her kitchen table, fixed herself some soup and a sandwich, and opened her email. The chicken noodle soup smelled amazing and set her stomach growling when she ladled it into a bowl. While reading the reviews on Goodreads for a client’s latest novel, she ate her dinner, and then spent the next several hours checking in with her clients, sending status reports, handling billing, and examining social media accounts.
Tomorrow, she had appointments with both the local fire department and police precinct for research on a rescue procedural novel one client was developing. Another client, also an author, needed her help identifying things she called sexy math. Lia did a quick Google search and jotted down some notes. She’d have to hit the library for this.
By eleven o’clock, her eyes were blurring and she figured it was time to call it a night. She stood up, stretched her neck to each side and almost screeched when a light knock sounded on her kitchen door.
She peered through the glass pane and opened the door, worry spiking. “Gabriel, is Kim—”
“Fine. They’re all fine and asleep,” he said quietly. “Can I come in?”
Lia nodded and stepped aside. He took in the laptop and notes spread all over her table while she shut and locked the door.
“I’m interrupting your work.” He held a baby monitor in his hand. He put it carefully on the counter, adjusted the volume.
“No, I’m done for the night.”
He nodded and studied her. God, she must look like an unmade bed. She smoothed her hair, discovered half of it had escaped its ponytail. She took out the band, started to scoop it into a new tail, but Gabriel stepped closer, covered her hands with his own and shook his head. “Don’t. Please.”
She swallowed hard. There was a glint in his eye she hadn’t seen before. She held her breath and lowered her hands, wondering what he’d do next.
He moved his hands up, tucking hair behind her ears, rubbing soft little circles against her scalp, lifting her hair and letting it fall all around her shoulders. “This was the first thing I noticed about you,” he whispered. “Fire I can hold in my hands.”
She squeaked and his lips twitched, a breath away from hers.
“Kiss me again.” He smiled.
God, she loved when he smiled. His grip on her hair tightened and he touched his mouth to hers.
Lia practically combusted. Gabriel’s mouth should be named a wonder of the world. Firm and skilled, that mouth took her from zero to about sixty in a matter of seconds. He cupped her cheeks, angling her face so he could kiss her deeper, and slid one hand down her back, settling on her butt, but the other…oh, he kept that one where it was, stroking and petting her hair. She let out a sound that sounded ridiculously like a purr.
“Gabriel,” she whispered. “This is insane.”
“I love how you say my name,” he said in her ear just before he bit the lobe and sent a jolt of need racing down to her core. “Lia.” He kissed her deep, fast. “I never thought I’d say this—feel this again—but please tell me you want me like I want you.”
“God, yes.”
His arms slid around her. She skimmed her hands under his shirt, felt the long muscles in his back quiver under her fingertips,
heard the hitch in his breath. His mouth came back to hers while her hands cruised up and down his body. When she gripped his butt, he moaned into her mouth, lifted her clear off her feet, pressed her hard against his body.
Things got fuzzy and blurry after that.
Lia was one exposed nerve ending. She didn’t notice when he set her on top of a countertop until she felt the icy coolness against her bare skin. Then, there was the rasp of his tongue against a nipple followed by the sweet pinch of teeth, the scent of clean male sweat, the gentle strength in those large hands as he stroked, explored, and aroused, the heat of his mouth on her—she couldn’t think, couldn’t speak, couldn’t remember her name. Circuits blew, scattering her into millions of tiny pieces that he caught and put back together.
When she finally managed to wrench her eyes open and focus, she found Gabriel staring down at her with a goofy grin on his face. His shirt dangled from the back of a chair. Her jeans were on the floor, her top shoved up and her bra askew. His unfastened jeans rode low on his hips, his chest heaved as he gulped in huge breaths, but his eyes gleamed with pure joy. “Lia. You…that was… I…” He shook his head, unable to find the words, and kissed her again. Slowly, he pulled away and she squeaked in protest.
“But Gabriel, you didn’t—” She reached out for him, but he caught her hand, and shook his head.
“I want to. God, you have no idea. But I can’t, Lia. I’ve left the girls alone too long as it is.”
The girls! Her eyes flew to the clock on her microwave.
He’d been here hardly ten minutes.
Ten. Minutes.
She looked back at him in wonder. How was it even possible for her to have—for him to—Lia blew out a shaky breath and began to laugh. “You’re not human.”
He retrieved his shirt and laughed—actually laughed—and emotion rippled over her in great tidal waves. “Oh, I’m human. Wish I wasn’t sometimes.” He bent his head down, kissed her stupid again, refastened his pants. “This is not one of those times.” He kissed her again. “Mm. I have to go. Lia. God, baby, I have to get back. I’m sorry.”