A Mother's Love

by Katie Flynn

  Had she thought the first night to be a baptism of fire, it had been nothing compared to the nights that followed. On the third night there had, she had heard later, been over three hundred German bombers. She did not doubt it, as the sky had seemed to be full of them, the planes swarming across the sky, dropping their bombs indiscriminately on the people of Liverpool far below. Their main targets were the docks and the factories around them, and Ellie could understand this; what she could not understand was the bombing of innocent people’s houses, hospitals, churches – nowhere seemed safe, and even though the RAF sent fighter pilots up in support of the ack-ack batteries prevention seemed to be an impossible task. The air raids had continued for the next five nights, although not on the same scale as the night of the third, but the gunners in Ellie’s section still remained on tenterhooks, expecting them to come back in force as they had on that dreadful night.

  It was the eleventh of May and Liverpool had been given respite from the attacks for the past three nights. ‘If they come back and continue in the same number as before we’ll be in real trouble. Why d’you reckon they stopped?’ she asked Gwen as they sat round the table in the canteen, their eyelids heavy as they tried to get some food into themselves before collapsing into their beds.

  ‘People are saying that Hitler’s getting ready to attack Russia, which is bad news for the Russians but good for us. He can’t fight on two fronts, so we may get a bit of a break, but how long for is anybody’s guess.’

  ‘I was going to go down into the city and see if I could be of any help. Do you fancy coming?’ Ellie said, trying to focus on Gwen, who was shaking her head.

  ‘You’re goin’ nowhere bar your bed, Ellie Lancton, and that’s exactly where I’ll be goin’. The folk of Liverpool need us protecting the skies, not falling asleep because we’ve burned the candle at both ends.’

  Ellie nodded. ‘I suppose you’re right. But if we get a bit of rest now, how about tomorrow? I want to see what’s been hit. This is my home, don’t forget; I want to make sure all my old pals are safe. I thought I could call in on the Winthorpes, and the Murrays too. I haven’t heard from Connor or Arla, but I bet they’re beside themselves with worry. I’d go and see Aidan’s mam and dad as well, only they’re too far away, so I thought I’d give Aidan a call instead, you know, just to check …’

  Gwen smiled sympathetically at her. ‘I’m lucky that me auntie and uncle are safely tucked away in the Welsh hills.’ She looked wistfully at her plate of stew. ‘Although they’ve been setting the mountains alight so’s to distract the bombers.’ She stopped talking and gently slid the plate of stew out from underneath Ellie’s arm. Then, stepping around the table, she gave Ellie’s shoulder a gentle shake.

  ‘Wake up, Ellie, you can’t sleep here. Let’s get you into your bed.’

  Ellie’s lips moved and her voice came out in a sleepy whisper. ‘Range, one one two and a three one, kept on target.’

  Gwen’s brow furrowed. They had all suffered from the anxiety; even when you went to your bed you couldn’t escape the nightmares that followed. The hut had been filled with people crying out in their sleep. Quite often the order to fire escaped a sleeping figure so clearly that several others in the hut fell out of bed as they tried to respond. Everyone was going through the same horror, but for Ellie it was worse. This was her home, the place where she had grown up, the streets that she had walked on her way to school or work or to visit a pal, the church that she had attended with her mother every Sunday. Her friends, her history, her very memories were all under threat, and poor Ellie was helpless to do anything except shout orders to fire guns which boomed into the night sky.

  Ellie jerked her head up from table and looked around the dimly lit room. ‘What time is it?’ she asked, her voice hollow through lack of sleep.

  Sliding one of her shoulders underneath Ellie’s arm, Gwen helped her friend get to her feet. ‘It’s time for your bed. Section D’s on shift, so you’ve nothing to worry about.’

  Ellie frowned. ‘But Tilly and Evie’re in Section D. Aren’t they tired?’

  Gwen held her tongue. Evelyn had supposedly been struck down by some mysterious stomach complaint after the first night of severe bombing. If it had been left to Corporal Caldecott, Gwen thought Evie would have been forced to get out there, stomach complaint or not, but Evie had gone straight to Sergeant Barton, who had insisted she stay in solitary confinement rather than spread the illness. Solitary confinement indeed, Gwen thought bitterly. She had been placed in one of the spare rooms in the sergeant’s billeted cottage. Gwen had felt certain that the other girls in her barracks would comment on the matter, but no one seemed willing to raise an objection.

  Gwen placed her arm around Ellie’s waist and guided her friend to the door. ‘We’re all tired, chuck, but everyone’s got to sleep – even the Germans – so let’s get you into bed. It’ll all be better for a good night’s kip.’

  Ellie yawned sleepily. ‘A good night’s kip? What’s one of them? Even if we aren’t dragged out of bed by the sirens, you can’t relax, not properly. I reckon I’ll feel better after I’ve been to the city. First chance I get I’m going to see what’s left of the place … might even pay old Lavender Court a visit.’

  Gwen pulled a face. She did not know for sure which areas of the city had been hit, but by all accounts you would be lucky if you did not know someone or somewhere close to your home that had been affected by the raids. If she were any judge, Ellie would be lucky to find her childhood home still standing.

  A few days later, the planned visit had been made, and Ellie in particular had been distraught at the sights that met her eyes. A lot of the places she had promised to take the girls on their nights out had gone. Blacklers had been destroyed, leaving a mere shell of a building, as had Lewis’s department store. Gwen had linked her arm through Ellie’s as her friend pointed out the devastation. She had shaken her head. ‘I don’t know what to say, Ellie, I really don’t,’ was all she could manage.

  Trying to find their way around a city that had been partially reduced to rubble was difficult, and with no familiar landmarks it was a while before Ellie got her bearings. As she guided her friend in the direction of Lavender Court, the girls found themselves being stopped by civilians who wanted to thank them for preventing the Luftwaffe from totally obliterating the city. They had been surprised, having feared they might get accused of not doing a good enough job, and were both relieved and happy to hear the opposite; pleased also to see that even though the city itself had been badly damaged the people remained in good spirits.

  ‘You got family there?’ one man had asked when Ellie had stopped to ask for directions to the courts.

  Ellie shook her head. ‘No, but up until recently it was my home, and I’ve still got friends who live there.’

  He pulled a face. ‘Some of ’em’ve been hit, but it’s hard to tell what’s what when you get there. Right bloody mess it is. Don’t go enterin’ somewhere what’s got damaged by the bombs, will you? Even if it is still standin’ it don’t mean to say it won’t come down round yer ears …’ He continued to drone on whilst Ellie scanned her surroundings. She knew which way she was headed; the main question now was which was the safest way to get there. A lot of the roads were blocked by rubble, and the buildings that did remain were, as the man said, unsafe to walk through. He stopped talking and looked at her inquisitively.

  ‘Sorry, what was that?’ she said.

  ‘I said to try goin’ straight down to the bottom of this ’ere road an’ take a left. Some of the buildin’s are still standin’ down there, so if you’re careful you might be able to pick your way round ’em.’

  Thanking him for his help, the two girls followed his directions. A journey that would normally have only taken Ellie ten minutes took twice that time as they made their way across the broken city.

  Ellie stopped abruptly in front of a pile of rubble. Pointing over the top of the broken bricks, she turned to Gwen. ‘It’s just over the
re. We’ll have to go round; I don’t fancy climbin’ this lot, so—’ She broke off as a familiar voice hailed her from behind.

  ‘Ellie Lancton! What on earth are you doin’ back ’ere? I thought you was off with the ATS …’ The speaker paused, eyeing the khaki uniform. ‘Don’t tell me you were on the ack-acks when all this was goin’ on? Blimey, I bet you was scared.’ Looking at the bricks on the floor in front of him he pulled a face. ‘I’m bloody glad we moved in with the wife’s rellies a couple of months ago – I wasn’t at the time, mind – else …’ He shuddered.

  ‘Mr Rogers!’ Ellie said, a feeling of relief sweeping over her at the sight of a familiar face. ‘This is a pal of mine, Gwen Jones. We’re in the same section, and in answer to your question we arrived the day before the bombing started; in fact our first night’s duty was the first night of the bombing.’ She glanced at the ruins of the building in front of her. ‘I wanted to show Gwen where I used to live, but it’s been a bit of an ordeal just to get this far. What’s the best way from here?’

  The old man removed his cap from his head and gripped the peak firmly between his gnarled fingers. ‘Don’t you know where you are?’

  Ellie frowned. ‘I’ve a rough idea, but to be honest, one pile of rubble looks much like another.’ She eyed Mr Rogers cautiously. There was something unnerving about his stance, and he appeared to be worried. Perhaps he was concerned she might ask him to climb over the rubble with her. She tried a different approach. ‘Mebbe you can point us in the right direction? I’m sure we’ll be able to get there once we know which way to go.’

  ‘You’re here,’ he said, then, seeing her incomprehension, he continued, ‘that is to say, you’re home.’ One arm leaning heavily on his cane, he waved the other in a sweeping motion at the bombed-out building.

  The colour drained from Ellie’s cheeks as she cast an eye over the pile of rubble. ‘Are you tryin’ to tell me that this is Lavender Court?’

  Slipping his hand into hers, the old man smiled sympathetically, revealing a set of crooked teeth. ‘God love you, queen, I thought you’d realised.’ He nodded at the devastation which lay before them. ‘This is – was – Lavender Court.’

  Ellie rocked on her heels and squeezed his fingers tightly. ‘I – I didn’t know. I thought it was further on …’ she said, the tears welling up.

  He shook her hand gently. ‘It’s just bricks and mortar, luv. I know it were your home, but when all’s said and done …’

  The tears ran silently down her cheeks. ‘It was more than just my home, it was the place where I grew up. I lived here with me mam, right up to …’

  Mr Rogers lowered his head. ‘I can still remember you runnin’ round in your nappy. ’Appy little bugger you were.’

  Gwen placed her arm round Ellie’s shoulders. ‘I’m so sorry, cariad. I can’t begin to imagine how you must be feeling.’

  ‘It’s like losing me mam all over again. It may have been a rotten, dirty, stinking place to live but it’s all I had left to remember her by. Now all those memories, everythin’, has just gone.’

  Mr Rogers stood in front of Ellie and lowered his head to catch her eye. ‘You listen to me, Ellie Lancton. You don’t need no bricks and mortar to remind you of your mam. You’ve still got all your memories in that there noggin’ of yours. She’ll allus be in your thoughts. She were a good ’un, were Millie: always had time for everyone, never turned her back … and we don’t need no stinkin’ court to remind us of that.’

  Ellie sniffed, a frown wrinkling her brow as another thought crossed her mind. ‘You said you didn’t live here any more when it was bombed, but what about Mrs B and Mr Turnbull? I know you were all livin’ together at one stage.’ She turned large hopeful eyes on him. ‘Had they moved out too?’

  Removing his cap, he scratched the top of his balding head. ‘Mr Turnbull moved out a month back, went off to live with his daughter in Scotland …’

  Ellie tried to look into his eyes but found he was avoiding her gaze. ‘What about Mrs B? Where was she?’ The panic started to rise in her throat, and her next words came out in a hoarse whisper. ‘Please don’t tell me she was at home.’

  He wiped his nose on the back of his hand. ‘She was meant to be leavin’ to stay with her sister, but she’d had a change of heart. There was just her and Sid here when the bomb fell.’

  Ellie hid her face behind her hands. ‘She’s gone? I’m – yes, I’m glad Sid’s dead, but not her. Not Mrs B. You couldn’t have wished to meet a kinder, more thoughtful soul.’

  Mr Rogers screwed his cap up in his hands, then unscrewed it and placed it firmly back on his head. ‘Sid’s not dead, queen. He made it out. In fact, they’re hailing him as a bit of a hero.’

  Ellie interrupted, her face lit up with hope. ‘Did he save her? Did he get her out? I know I’ve said some pretty bad things about him in the past …’

  Mr Rogers laid a restraining hand on her arm. ‘Hang on a minute, queen. I never said nothin’ about him savin’ no one, I just said they hailed him as a bit of a hero.’

  Ellie’s shoulders sank. ‘But if he didn’t save anyone, why would they?’

  ‘He tried his best to get her out of the building, but the walls were collapsing around his ears and they got separated,’ Mr Rogers began, but Ellie was having none of it.

  ‘You don’t believe him, do you? He’d not save his own mother if it meant putting his own life at risk. You don’t know him like I do, Mr Rogers; I bet he didn’t even try to get her out. Did anyone check to see if she was still alive? Is she still in there?’

  Ellie began to climb the rubble, calling out, ‘Mrs B! Mrs B! It’s me, Ellie. Are you in there?’

  ‘What you doin’?’ came a gruff voice from behind them. Turning, Ellie saw a young man in warden’s uniform approaching them.

  ‘Is that you, Wally Redfern?’

  The warden grinned. ‘Sure is.’ He wagged a reproving finger. ‘Sorry, Ellie, but no one’s allowed to go playin’ on bombed buildings. There could be anythin’ under that lot, unexploded bombs, broken mains … any number of hidden dangers. You can’t stay ’ere, luv. I’m goin’ to have to ask you to move on.’

  Ellie shook her head. ‘Not until I know whether—’

  Mr Rogers cut across her. ‘They’ve already taken the body out, Ellie.’

  Ellie’s lip trembled as she began to make her way back towards the trio. ‘I – I didn’t realise,’ she said, just as her foot slipped down some of the bricks. There was a slight rumble behind her and several more bricks began to tumble from the top of the pile.

  ‘Watch out!’ shouted the warden.

  Ellie jumped down on to the pavement. ‘I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean—’

  ‘Did you hear that?’ Gwen said suddenly, looking towards the disturbed bricks.

  The warden turned pale. ‘It weren’t a ticking noise, was it?’

  Gwen shook her head. ‘It sounded like a baby.’

  From under the rubble there came a faint cry. Gwen, Ellie and Wally exchanged glances, and the warden nodded slowly. ‘Blimey! You’re right, that did sound like a baby, but surely to goodness …’

  The sound came again, but stronger this time. Ellie peered at the rubble. ‘Hello? Can you hear me? Shout if you can, and we’ll try and get you.’

  Mr Rogers pointed to where some small stones were trickling down the pile. ‘Well I’m blessed.’ Ellie looked, and to her amazement a small black fluffy ball poked its head through the rubble.

  Leaning forward, Gwen made some encouraging noises as she tried to persuade it to come towards them. They watched its tiny legs wobble while it sought to gain balance on the precarious terrain. Kneeling down beside Gwen, Ellie beckoned. ‘Hello, little one! Come here. We’ll look after you.’

  It turned to face them, eyeing them for a moment or two before leaping across the rubble towards them, mewing as it came.

  Ellie scooped the kitten up into her arms and smiled as it pushed its head against her chin. ‘You poor little thi
ng, you’re skin and bone. How long have you been under that lot?’

  Mr Rogers shook his head disbelievingly. ‘Wonders will never cease. The mother must’ve crawled in there to give birth.’ Craning his neck, he tried to get a better view of the hole from which the kitten had emerged. ‘I reckon this ’un must’ve got lost or left behind, ’cos I can’t hear nowt else, can you?’

  Ellie wiped her tear-stained cheeks with the back of her hand. ‘No, but we’d best look, don’t you think?’ She half expected the warden to object, but when the kitten in her arms began to mew loudly a returning chorus came from the top of the pile.

  Wally had already placed a tentative foot on the unsteady bricks. ‘Sounds like there’s a few more in there. I’ll take a quick peek inside the hole, see what’s what.’

  They watched as the warden, arms held out for balance, slipped and stumbled his way towards the hole. He bent down gingerly, and peered into the gloom. When he looked back his face was split by a broad grin. He beckoned to Gwen. ‘Can you come and give us a hand, queen? I reckon there’s at least another two, only they’re not as brave as that one, so I’m goin’ to have to reach in.’

  Delighted there were more survivors, Gwen picked her way across the bricks. The warden tentatively pushed his hand into the hole and passed her a kitten. ‘I can see the mam and one more little ’un. You take this one back to the old feller whilst I get the last one out.’

  Obediently, Gwen passed the kitten over to Mr Rogers, who, despite Ellie’s warnings, had climbed a little way up the debris. Returning to the warden, she held out eager hands. ‘I’m surprised their mam didn’t try and fight you off. Perhaps she realises we’re tryin’ to help them.’

  Nodding, the warden held the last kitten out, then peered back into the gloom. Gwen watched as he wormed both hands into the hole. ‘C’mon, darlin’, come and be with your babbies. We’re not goin’ to hurt you,’ he soothed, his fingertips brushing against the soft fur. He shook his head. ‘It’s no good, I can’t reach her. Lemme get my torch out, see if I can find a better way …’ Shining his torch into the hole, he gave a cry of triumph. ‘That’s better. I can see her properly now. Tek that little ’un down to Ellie and come back here so’s you can shine the torch whilst I get a hold of her. She’s tucked herself into a corner, probably scared out of her wits.’