by Beth Elliott
‘I am not yours!’ she protested furiously.
At this he leaned forward and planted his lips on hers. She uttered an inarticulate protest and struggled to break free. All at once she felt Etienne’s arms wrenched away from her and she stepped back, wiping a hand across her mouth. She drew in a sobbing breath and looked up to see Theo, his face like thunder, holding a struggling Etienne by the arms. He looked ready to strangle the Frenchman.
Kitty looked from one to the other. She saw despair as well as anger on Etienne’s face. It was the last straw. She gave a tiny sob. The sound seemed to recall Theo from his murderous intention. His expression turned to contempt. He pushed Etienne towards the curtain. ‘Get out,’ he grated, ‘I will speak to you later.’
Etienne glanced towards Kitty. She turned her head away. He glared at Theo and fumbled his way through the curtain. Theo turned to Kitty. His face was as cold as ice. ‘Has he hurt you?’ His voice sounded almost indifferent.
She shook her head. It was impossible to speak. She swallowed hard and blinked. Suddenly her knees were trembling. She heard Theo mutter something under his breath and felt his hand grasp her elbow. He guided her to a chair and pushed her down on it.
‘Come, Miss Towers, do not be distressed.’ he said in an impatient tone. He held out a large white handkerchief. Kitty clutched it thankfully and mopped her eyes, which would keep filling with tears. Theo waited for a few minutes.
‘There is no need to cry,’ he said at last. ‘You are quite safe now.’
Kitty nodded her head and drew in a deep breath. ‘H-How did you find me?’
‘I heard him tell you your friend was here. But when I saw her with her mother, I realized that it was a trick. And at that moment Lady Caroline asked me to rescue you discreetly.’
‘Oh.…’ Kitty stared at him in consternation. ‘Does everyone know I was in here alone with him?’
Theo raised his dark brows. ‘Only Caroline – you know she has a talent for observing everything.’ He inspected her. ‘Considering how he manhandled you, you are still very neat. But if I may be so bold, he has disarranged your smart hairstyle.’
Kitty raised her hands but they were shaking too much for her to straighten her ringlets.
Theo frowned. ‘We must make haste. Will you permit me?’
Kitty nodded and stood very still while he deftly adjusted the clasp. She felt his fingers brush her neck as he arranged her ringlets again. ‘Thank you, you are very kind,’ she said in a constricted voice. ‘I think I am ready to go back into the ballroom now.’
‘I will go first,’ said Theo. ‘When I leave, count to twenty, then come out and make your way back to Mrs Warrington. And I promise you, you will not have to speak to Monsieur de Saint-Aubin again.’ He nodded abruptly, his face still a cold mask and slipped through the curtain.
Immediately, Kitty heard a strident female voice exclaim: ‘Theodore! I have been looking everywhere for you.’
Stifling a gasp of horror, Kitty looked around but there was nowhere to hide. She gulped. If she was discovered there would be a terrible scandal. Then she heard Theo’s voice.
‘Lady Payne, Miss Payne.’
The woman’s voice boomed out again, interrupting him. ‘If my eyes did not deceive me, you were dancing just now? With a young lady in a pink dress?’
There was a slight pause, then, ‘Indeed, ma’am,’ in a haughty tone.
‘Oh … well … how splendid that you have recovered at long last. I am sure Letitia has a dance available for you.’
‘Alas, ma’am, I fear I was too precipitate. My leg is still weak. That is why I sought shelter in the alcove – to rest it. But come, may I at least find you ladies something to drink? It is very hot, is it not?’
The voices faded. Kitty’s heartbeat gradually slowed. She smoothed her dress down, counted to twenty and slipped through the curtain. She took a quick look around. There was no sign of Theo. Had anyone noticed her? How long had she been in there? A lively country dance was in full swing and the crowd was as dense as ever. She wove through the groups of onlookers until she reached Mrs Warrington. That lady was busily talking to a couple of other mothers. It was a few minutes before she noticed Kitty and even then, she just nodded at her and carried on with her conversation.
Kitty fanned herself, trying to look calm. He should have respected me, she thought angrily; how could he think I would submit to being forced into agreeing anything in such a way. She cringed inside as the memory of Etienne’s embrace kept forcing itself into her mind. What would have happened if Theo had not arrived at that moment?
Kitty grew hot and cold as she remembered he had seen Etienne kissing her. And after that he had been so cold and impatient with her. There was no trace of the warm smiles and friendly conversation they had enjoyed during their first ever dance together, just before Etienne interrupted them.
As she looked back, Kitty realized how each time she had shown any pleasure in Theo’s company, Etienne had stepped in to whisper his poisonous suspicions. She could see now that it was all due to jealousy. But he had succeeded in driving them apart.
When she considered the change in Theo’s attitude after he came into the alcove, she felt a dark shadow creep over her heart. Surely he could not believe she wanted Etienne to maul her like that. By this time, she was feeling so miserable that it was only pride that was keeping her upright. She longed to go home. But her sufferings were not yet over. Caroline appeared at her side.
‘Well, darling, whatever will you do next?’ she murmured, looking Kitty over with a critical eye. ‘You are certainly setting my guests at each other’s throats.’ Her eyes moved towards a tall shape on the opposite side of the room. Kitty followed her gaze. To her horror, she saw it was Theo talking to Etienne. The exchange was very brief and obviously angry. Kitty watched both men nod sharply to each other and then Theo turned away. Etienne was glaring after him.
‘You see?’ Caroline glanced at her. ‘Pistols, I expect. Theo likes pistols and he obviously issued the challenge.’
‘A duel – oh, no,’ gasped Kitty, ‘what a stupid thing to do. I have to stop them.’ She took a hasty step forward.
Caroline laid a hand on her arm. ‘You will do no such thing. Let them settle the matter in their own way.’
‘But what if one of them shoots the other?’ Kitty looked at her in anguish.
‘Oh, I doubt it.’ She gave a brittle laugh. ‘There is no need to go white, darling. I never heard that Theo actually aims at his opponent. He delopes.’
‘What does that mean?’
‘He fires into the air.’
Kitty shook her head in bewilderment. ‘Why bother to issue a challenge in the first place?’ Then she grew alarmed. ‘But suppose Etienne wounds him?’
Caroline shrugged. ‘I did warn you never to find yourself alone with him, darling. You will just have to wait and see what the outcome is.’
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
The first light of dawn showed the outline of the windows. Kitty raised her face from her pillow. She smoothed back her tousled hair.
‘Crying will not solve anything,’ she scolded herself angrily, scrubbing at her eyes with Theo’s handkerchief. It felt damp. She held it to her cheek. ‘It is all I will ever have of him now.’ With a sigh, she sat up and thumped the pillow back into shape. The faint light was creeping into the room. A moment later, she slipped out of bed to pull the curtain back and stare out. Maybe even now Theo and Etienne were on their way to wherever it was that men went to fight a duel.
Kitty pressed the handkerchief to her mouth. Caroline had said he fought lots of duels, she thought, but he never aimed at his opponent. But what about Etienne? She remembered the look of despair on his face when she had rejected him. He might try to get rid of his rival. She screwed her eyes tight shut in anguish. What a shocking state of affairs.
Shivering, she turned away from the window at last and climbed back into bed. Her mind dwelt on that wonderful dance with Theo, and on
the way he looked at her as he kissed her hand. At that moment, Kitty had felt sure he loved her. And then such a short time later, when he found her in Etienne’s arms being kissed, even though it was against her will, he had been so cold, so abrupt, that she was sure his feelings towards her had changed to disgust.
Kitty dwelt for a while on Theo’s blue eyes and then shivered as she remembered the sound of his deep voice, that special tone he used when he talked to her – until their last encounter in the alcove, that is. A life with no Theo in it stretched ahead of her. Kitty’s heart seemed to shrivel at the idea. A tear dripped off her chin.
‘Oh, merciful heavens!’ Great-aunt Picton collapsed against her sofa cushions with a moan. ‘You did what?’ Her voice was very faint, but Kitty could hear the anger in it. Lady Picton waved one white hand. ‘My smelling salts.’ Kitty hastened to find them from amongst the jumble of pots and pillboxes on the little table. She opened the bottle and pressed it into her aunt’s hand. After a few sniffs, that lady opened one eye.
‘Why did you refuse him? A fine young man like that, always so polite and attentive – and he is my best friend’s grandson. I had settled with myself that I would leave my fortune to you so that between the pair of you, you could live in comfort.… Oh, I have no patience with you. Surely you like Etienne enough to consider his proposal?’
To her dismay, Kitty saw that tears were running down her aunt’s cheeks. She knelt down by the sofa and took the old lady’s hand. ‘I am very sorry to grieve you like this, ma’am,’ she began, ‘but I do not feel able to trust Monsieur de Saint-Aubin. And I certainly cannot like him well enough to consider marriage with him.’
Lady Picton raised her head and directed a piercing stare at her. ‘Who is it?’ As colour flamed into Kitty’s cheeks, she nodded grimly. ‘It’s Hethermere’s boy, isn’t it? Theodore Weston. You have fallen for a rake, foolish girl. You would do better to reconsider.’
‘Oh, Aunt, truly I cannot – I do not trust him.’ Her aunt was still glaring at her, so Kitty added, ‘I think I must tell you the whole story.’ The result, however, dismayed her even more. Aunt Picton became quite rigid with horror.
‘Alone in an alcove with two of the most notorious rakes in town,’ she exclaimed, ‘and you think nobody noticed! It must be all over London by now – and as for this duel.…’ She gave another moan and recruited her strength with a sniff from the vinaigrette.
‘I am very sorry, ma’am—’ began Kitty.
‘Yes, well, it is no use to lament now. We must do what we can to stop tongues wagging. You will go about your affairs as usual.’ She wagged a gnarled finger, ‘No sign of consciousness about last night if anybody tries to hint at the matter.’
‘It seems to me that I have caused you enough trouble, Aunt. Dear ma’am, I have made up my mind that the best thing is for me to go home as soon as possible. That way, you may be easy.’
‘Go home? You will do no such thing! Good God, girl, after getting yourself into such a scrape, is that the best you can think of?’ She cast a glance of scorn at Kitty. ‘Have you learned nothing of society? You have to show the world that you have nothing to hide. You will oblige me by going to your room and dressing yourself ready for an outing in the park.’
Kitty stared mutinously at her aunt. It seemed a very foolish idea to her. And the last thing she wanted was to set eyes on anyone who had been involved in the painful scenes of the previous evening.
‘Come, child,’ her aunt’s voice broke into these thoughts, ‘you will do this to please me.’
Kitty duly presented herself to her aunt, dressed in the green cambric gown bought for her at the beginning of her stay. Her hair was carefully arranged into the topknot and ringlets that great-aunt Picton approved of. But nothing could disguise her pale cheeks and the dark smudges under her eyes.
‘We will have to set your lack of colour down to tiredness after dancing the whole evening,’ said Lady Picton, after trying in vain to disguise Kitty’s wan appearance.
They set out on the short drive to Hyde Park. Kitty sat bolt upright in the carriage with her hands tightly clasped in her lap. She did not like to feel she was the subject of gossip. Her aunt was in a militant mood and kept a sharp lookout for any acquaintances. The coach stopped frequently, so they could exchange greetings with her many elderly friends. Kitty had only to nod and smile. She began to relax. So far, none of these persons had mentioned the ball and she was sure they were all too old to have been present at it.
She studied the throng of walkers, looking out for Amelia or Freddy, two friends she could talk to without fear of criticism. She was much encouraged when a couple of young ladies she knew exchanged bows with her as they walked along the path beside the carriageway. But she would not feel at ease until she heard that both Etienne and Theo had returned safely from the duel.
At the thought of Theo, her heart pounded. But it was no good, she thought numbly, he had shown her what his opinion of her was. Looking back, Kitty realized that they had never managed to be together for long without a quarrel, and yet, he had often shown such warmth when they talked together. She wanted so much to help him with his plans for his hospice. All such schemes had to be forgotten now. She felt the tears pricking the back of her eyes and blinked them away. Somehow she had to show a calm face to the world, today and every day until she could return home. Yet now the prospect of going back to her old life did not seem attractive any more. Kitty shook herself mentally.
‘Whatever is the matter with the woman?’
Kitty roused from her thoughts to see her aunt staring at a couple of ladies in a barouche. Their carriage was stationary and the occupants were gazing at Kitty and nodding to each other.
‘Do you know them, ma’am?’ Kitty thought she had never seen two such plain women. What was more, their frilled and ruched pelisses and feathered bonnets drew attention to their own plain faces.
‘Do you remember the conversation at Lady Deane’s tea party, my love? There you see Lady Payne and her daughter. The one she plans to marry to your rake,’ added the old lady viciously. ‘If she has the slightest idea about last night, she will do her best to ruin you.’
‘So that is Lady Payne. I overheard her asking about me – after I had danced with Mr Weston. I do not think she knows any more than that.’
‘Hmm – enough to drive her wild with jealousy even so. Pretend not to see her, child.’
Satisfied at last that they had been seen by a good number of people, Aunt Picton directed her coachman to return to Grosvenor Square. Once she reached her armchair, the old lady fixed a sharp eye on Kitty.
‘You are looking quite worn out, child – and no wonder. But that was a job we had to do. Now let us drink our tea and then we can both retire to enjoy a rest.’
Kitty was glad to obey. She needed time to school herself into a calmer state of mind. She would learn to live with the heartache. If only she did not feel so terribly weary. Putting Theo’s handkerchief against her cheek, she lay down on the bed and closed her eyes. Tomorrow, she decided, she would set about persuading her aunt to let her go home. For the moment, however, she just needed to rest for a little while.
Eventually Kitty fell asleep. Nobody disturbed her and so it was not until the following morning, when the housemaid brought a cup of chocolate to her bedroom, that she received the note sent round by Amelia the previous evening.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
‘I see nothing for it but to take Amelia out of town for a few days,’ Mrs Warrington informed Kitty. She sighed. ‘She has been in a terrible state for the last two days. Really, when we arrived at that ball I was so proud of both you girls. You looked wonderful – and the young men were flocking to dance with you both.’ She plucked aimlessly at her lace-edged handkerchief. ‘Whatever went wrong?’
It was most unlike her to be sitting idly. Kitty could not remember ever seeing Mrs Warrington without some piece of stitchery in her hands. She said nothing, waiting to hear whether Mrs Warringto
n had picked up any gossip from the ball. But it soon became obvious that the poor lady’s mind was totally taken up by her daughter’s sudden collapse.
There was a short silence. Kitty felt the tension growing inside. First, her aunt, now Amelia’s mother – so much explaining to do, so much misery to hide. Eventually, as poor Mrs Warrington just sat there, gazing rather blankly at the window, Kitty cleared her throat.
‘May I see Millie? It is most unlike her to keep to her room.’
Mrs Warrington nodded. ‘Do go up, Kitty. Maybe you can pluck her out of this silly state she has fallen into.’
Even as she spoke, a footman came in with a tray of refreshments. Mrs Warrington rubbed her forehead. ‘Oh, Heavens, I had quite forgotten.…’ She looked at Kitty, ‘Make haste and bring Amelia down, if you please, Kitty. Lady Caroline will pay us a visit shortly.’
Alarmed, Kitty made her way up another flight of stairs. She had a fair idea of what had caused Millie to feel so unhappy. But it was unlikely she would reveal her feelings. She found Amelia seated on a chair by the window, twisting a damp handkerchief between her fingers. At the sight of Kitty she gave a sob.
‘Oh, that will never do,’ Kitty chided, smiling as she came up to the window. ‘Do you know, Millie, it is most unfair that you can sit and cry and still look so pretty.’ She pulled up another chair and sat facing her friend. Her own face twisted and she gave a gulp and said in a rather wobbly voice, ‘I believe I said it before – we were better off at home.’
Amelia nodded. ‘Things have become so complicated,’ she whispered. ‘I really do not know what to do with myself. I never felt so unhappy before in my life.’ She scrubbed at her eyes and added, ‘Mama is angry with me for allowing myself to be so cast down.’
‘She is upset that we did not leave the ball in triumph.’ Kitty hesitated, then said. ‘I saw you in conversation with Mr Thatcham,’ she prompted. ‘You both looked extremely pale.’
