Bacillus of Beauty: A Romance of To-day

by Harriet Stark

  CHAPTER III.

  THE SUDDENNESS OF DEATH.

  The Nicaragua, March 29.

  How could I have known that he would die?

  I had never seen any one die. It was as if life were a precious winerushing from an overturned glass that I could not put right again. Idid not dream a man could be so fragile.

  For weeks I have not added a word to this record. But now I have lookedupon death, and I must write. There is no one to confide in but thislittle book, stained by so many tears, confident of so many sorrows, somany disappointments.

  Prof. Darmstetter is dead.

  Dead, but not by my fault. I was not the thousandth part to blame. YetI tremble like a leaf to think of it. I shall get no sleep to-night andto-morrow look like a fright to pay for it--no! I can never do thatnow, thank God! Thank God for that!

  Yes, I'm glad; when I try to be calm, I am glad he's dead--no, notthat--sorry he's dead, of course, but glad that my rights aresafe--when I am calm.

  But I can't be calm; it was too horrible!

  It happened yesterday in the laboratory; we were alone together. I haveseldom been to the laboratory of late, but I had begun to suspect thatthe Professor was planning treachery, preparing to try the Bacillusupon other women. He had been so impatient because I had not gone oftenenough, that he might make his records, his comparisons, his tests--Idon't know what flummery. All at once he ceased his importunities; someinstinct taught me that he was about to seek a more tractable subject.I was resolved that if he did contemplate such injustice, I should puta stop to it. And I went to watch him.

  Was that wrong? Why, he had promised me that I should have pioneer'srights in the realm of beauty. Sole possession was to be my reward? Ihad the right to hold him to his promise. But I didn't think--

  Yesterday I spoke to Prof. Darmstetter. That was how it came about. Hehad looked disconcerted at my appearance in the laboratory, and mysuspicions had suddenly grown to certainty. I said to him:--

  "I wish to see you alone."

  A guilty look came to his face. I was watching him as he had watched mebefore the great change, and when he started at my words I knew he wasthinking of playing me false; his conscience must have warned him thatI had read his thoughts. But he knew that my strength was greater thanhis and he bowed assent.

  When the other girls had gone--some of them with frightened looks atme, as if mine were the devil's beauty they tell about--and when Prof.Darmstetter was ready to begin his own work, I faced him with achallenge:--

  "Prof. Darmstetter, you are about to break your word."

  "You are mistaken," he said; but he could not face my look.

  "I am not mistaken; you are planning to try the Bacillus upon otherwomen, and you promised that I should be first."

  "And so you are! I dit not promise t'at you should be t'e onlybeautiful voman all your life, or ten years, or von year. You haf t'ehonour of being first. It is all, and it is enough. You shall be famousby t'at. I am an old man and must sometime brint my discofery for t'egoot of t'e vorld; but first I must make experiments; I must try theBacillus vit' a blonde voman, vit' a brunette voman, vit' a negrovoman--it vill be fine to share t'e secrets of Gott and see v'at Hemeant to make of t'e negro."

  If his enthusiasm had not run counter to my rights, I might haveadmired it.

  "I must try it vit' a cripple," he went on, "vit' an idiot, vit' a deafand dumb voman. I must set it difficult tasks, learn its limitations.T'en I must publish."

  "You shall do nothing of the kind. You are not a very old man and I amyoung. I have your secret safe, and it shall not be lost to the worldeven if you die. I shall see that your name is coupled with theBacillus as that of its discoverer. Do you think I care to rob you ofyour honours? I value them little, compared with the beauty you havegiven me. Think what you promised me! That I should be first! And Ihave had the perfect beauty only a few days and already you areplanning to make it cheap and common. This injustice I will oppose withall my might, but I will be fair with you."

  "Fair vit' me!" he shouted. "Vat do you mean? T'at I shall die unknown,vit' t'e greatest discofery of all time in my hands? You call t'atfair? It is not fair to me, because I haf hungered for fame as you forbeauty. But t'at is not'ing; t'at is for me only, and I am not'ing. Itis not fair to t'e vorld to vit'hold t'is precious gift one hour longert'an is necessary to experiment, to try, to make sure. To keep t'ispossession all to yourself vould you deny it to millions of yoursisters?"

  "Yes, I would; and so would they, in my place," I cried. "I care asmuch for my beauty as you for your fame. And I hold you to yourpromise. I was to be first, and I shall be first. I haven't yet begunto live. You have barely finished your experiments, and now you'replanning my ruin. I will not be balked."

  "I vill not be balked by such selfishness," screamed Prof. Darmstetter,his parchment face livid with rage; "_I_ vill be master of my own vork."

  My beauty! My hold on life and power and success and love! My only hopeof Ned, if he loves me--and God knows whether he does or no! See suchbeauty multiplied by the thousand, the million? Never!

  I forced myself to be calm. My anger left me in a moment. I knew howuseless it was, and I remembered that he himself had armed me for myprotection. I smiled and held out both my hands to him, and I could seehim falter as he looked.

  "Look at me!" I said. My voice was a marvel even to myself, so rich andfull and musical! "Look at me! Of what use was it to make me beautifulif you are now to make me unhappy? Ah, I beg of you, I implore you,don't be just, but be kind! Let me have my own way and see--oh, see howI shall thank you!"

  His face changed as I moved toward him with a coaxing smile, anddropped my hands on his shoulders. The tempest of his wrath subsided assuddenly as it had risen, and he stood short-sightedly, his head thrustforward, peering into my eyes, helpless, panting, disarmed.

  "You will not--ah, you will not!" I whispered.

  "Ach, Du!" he murmured. "Du bist mein Frankenstein! Ich kannnicht--ich--ich habe alles verloren, verloren! Ehre, Ruhm, Pflicht,Redlichkeit, den guten Namen! Verloren! Verloren!"

  A touch of colour that I had never seen there before grew slowly in hischeeks. It was the danger signal; but I did not know; indeed I did notknow!

  "Come," I said, shaking him lightly, playfully; "promise me that youwill not do it for a year."

  "Delilah!" he whispered from behind set lips, his breath comingquicker, a hoarse rattling in his throat.

  Then he snatched my hand and began pressing kisses upon it--greedily,like a man abandoning himself to a sudden impulse.

  But the next moment, before I could move, he threw back his head andtottered to a chair, where he sat for an instant, breathing heavily.Just as I sprang toward him his frame stiffened and straightened and heslipped from the chair and fell heavily to the floor, where he laylimp, unbreathing, sprawled upon the bare boards in all the pitifulugliness of death.

  I was terribly frightened.

  For a moment wild thoughts raced through my brain--foolish impulses offlight lest I be found with the body and somehow be held responsible.Then, with scorn for my folly, I ran out into the hall, crying for help.

  The janitor rushed in, and seeing what had happened, went for thenearest physician, who came at once and knelt by the fallen man's side.But before he closed the staring eyes, rose from his examination of theprostrate figure and slowly shook his head, we both knew that Prof.Darmstetter was dead.

  "His heart--." he began, turning for the first time toward me, whom asyet he had not noticed; and then he started back and stoodopen-mouthed, transfixed, staring at me--at my beauty.

  In that sweet instant, call it wicked or not, I was glad thatDarmstetter was dead! I could not help it. So long as he lived, I wasnot safe.

  I did not blame him for planning to experiment with others, any morethan I would have blamed a cat that scratches or a snake that stings. Iwill be just. His love of learning overbore his honour. He could nothave kept faith. I should never have been safe with him in the
sameworld. Yet am I sorry for him. I owe him much.

  In the Doctor's wondering gaze at me over the body of my beauty'screator I felt anew the sense of power that has inspired me by nightand day since my great awakening.

  I have had bitter experiences of late; this has been the worst, yet ina way the most fortunate. By no fault of mine I am relieved of thedanger of seeing beauty like--like this too common.

  And I will be fair to the dead man, though he was not fair to me: ifthere is a God above, by Him I swear that I will write out the secretof the Bacillus this day, so that it shall not be lost if I too diesuddenly, as he--

  I will devise it to humanity, and John Burke shall execute the will.Poor fellow! Poor John!

  I can't see that I was wrong. I did not know, Prof. Darmstetter himselfprobably did not know, that he was liable to such an attack. Even if Ihad known--I had the right to defend myself, hadn't I? It was not likethe Nelly Winship I once knew to use such weapons against him; but thatNelly is as dead as he, and this glorious vision of white and rosy tintand undulant form shall be rival-less for years; marvel of every land,the theme of every tongue.

  I sit alone in this huge palace in which I have come to live--feelingthat at last I have a home of my own, where no one can overlook mythoughts--I sit alone and think of the future; and it is rosy bright,if only I could forget--if only I could forget!

  In all the world I am the sole guardian of the Secret. I shall be themost beautiful woman for years and years and years; blessed with suchbeauty that men shall know the tale of it is a lie, until they, too,come from far countries to look upon it; and they shall go home and beknown as liars in their turn, and always dream of me. When I am old andgray, I will tell the world how Darmstetter died, on the eve ofpublishing his discovery. Perhaps I shall cling to it until I, too--

  Ah, I can see that ghastly Thing, the dead, hideous eyes staring up atme! Shall I be like that some day? As ugly as that!

  It was not my fault, dead, staring eyes; not my fault!