The Sea Within

by Missouri Vaun

  There were gaps in the passageways, so at the end of certain blocks you had to traverse sections of the street in the open. Elle had a portable breather in the bag, but she didn’t think she’d need it for this short trek.

  As she exited the automatic door, she sidestepped a middle-aged guy sitting on a flattened piece of cardboard. She wasn’t sure if he was asleep or awake. It was hard not to engage or make eye contact with people living on the street. But she’d had bad encounters in the past, so these days, she avoided interactions when possible. Children were her weakness though, and most of the time she couldn’t help offering a child food or clothing, sometimes a blanket. There just wasn’t enough work. Automation and peak oil had taken more than sixty percent of lower and middle-class jobs, and social services failed to keep up. Layer on top of that the communities displaced from sea level rise and cities just couldn’t accommodate everyone.

  Elle wondered on rare occasions, when she was feeling pessimistic, if the problems were so big that no one and nothing could solve them. She chided herself. She could only focus on the issues she could improve. Big problems got solved by chipping away at them with small actions.

  “In a hurry?” A shaggy bearded man stepped out of a shadowed doorway. Elle hadn’t seen him and had to step off the sidewalk to keep from bumping into him.

  Elle didn’t answer him. She made eye contact for an instant. His demeanor seemed a little aggressive although he made no move to follow her as she passed. After another twenty feet she was inside the next corridor, breathing better air.

  The tension in her shoulders didn’t ease until she’d put two blocks between herself and the man.

  Jasmine was already at the restaurant when she arrived. Her short dark curls framed her slender face, cut in such a way as to accentuate her elegant cheekbones. Jasmine smiled when she saw Elle. Her brown skin contrasted warmly against an emerald green blouse. Jasmine was a full-time ER nurse and a part-time yoga instructor. She was enviably fit. Elle had tried yoga, but she could never quiet her mind. For her, the treadmill was a better fit.

  “Is this table okay?” Jasmine stood and gave her a one-armed hug. “There was only one other spot, but it was right up front near the door.”

  That would have put them right by the passageway exit, too much foot traffic and too much noise.

  “No, this is good.” Elle slipped out of her light jacket and took a seat. The café was packed. The dull hum of voices surrounded them.

  After a few minutes, a waiter took their order.

  “You’re not getting a drink?”

  Jasmine had ordered a mineral water.

  “I have to go straight to the hospital after this.” Jasmine grimaced. “Night shift.”

  “We could have rescheduled.”

  “No, I wanted to see you. Besides, I needed to eat and so do you.” She touched her glass to Elle’s when their drinks arrived.

  “I’m sorry it’s been so hard to connect lately.” The waiter brought a small wooden tray with tiny portions of pickled veggies, olives, and sweet peppers. “You know how it is.”

  “Yes, I need to hear all about that.” Elle tasted her cocktail. It was pink and had a decidedly strawberry flavor. She couldn’t taste the alcohol at all, so she’d probably end up drinking it too fast.

  “Well, let’s see. There was Steven. That date lasted all of twelve minutes.”

  “Oh, wow, you’re practically engaged,” Elle teased her.

  “Ha ha, very funny.”

  “How does a date last twelve minutes?”

  “We chatted over the app, then decided to meet for drinks.” Jasmine paused as the waiter delivered two steaming bowls of Thai peanut noodle soup. “The first few minutes went okay. He was cute and funny. Then I asked him where he grew up and he said hell. And then clarified that he’d meant Arizona.”

  Hell was an accurate description of Arizona. No one had been able to consistently live there for probably twenty years. Too damn hot.

  “What happened then?” Elle stirred her soup with chopsticks.

  “I thought he was joking, you know, because Arizona is sort of like hell, right?”

  “Yes, absolutely.”

  Heat became lethal for anything that breathes at one hundred and fifteen degrees. The sun assaulted you. The air would be thick and hazy. The heat radiated up from the concrete. Trains became convection ovens. Planes couldn’t get enough lift in the thin, hot air. Power lines sagged, buzzed, and transformers overloaded, popped, and exploded.

  “Well, he wasn’t joking. And when I agreed with him that Arizona was a hell-scape he got all offended and started arguing with me.”

  “What a jerk.”

  “Yeah, he just kept getting louder and louder. No matter what I said.” Jasmine put up her hands in mock surrender. “I finally asked him to leave and then I waited in the bar for over an hour before I left to make sure he wasn’t waiting outside to follow me home.”

  “Creepy.”

  “Yeah, luckily, I bumped into Dane. He walked me back to my place.”

  Dane was a mutual friend that they’d both known since college. He was a nice guy, but more friend material than hookup material.

  “I’m so sorry that happened.”

  “Oh, God, it was such a disaster.”

  Elle shook her head, sympathetic to Jasmine’s plight. She held a few noodles aloft to allow them to cool. Threads of steam rose and then disappeared.

  “At least it was only a twelve-minute disaster.”

  “Truth.” Jasmine air toasted with her water glass. “Okay, your turn. Did anything interesting happen at the Green Club the other night?”

  Elle exhaled and shook her head.

  “I thought so, but then…well, it just didn’t go anywhere.” Elle studied her soup. “It was weird. We actually got as far as one of the upstairs rooms and we kissed…” She paused.

  “And?”

  “And then something changed. It was like a switch got flipped and the woman just left.” Elle sampled more of her dessert cocktail. “It was a completely awful experience. I really hate trying to meet—anyone.”

  Jasmine covered Elle’s hand with hers.

  “Don’t let one weird, random experience derail everything, Elle. It’s good that you put yourself out there. I have no idea what her problem was, but I’m sure it had nothing to do with you.” Jasmine quirked an eyebrow. “Have you seen you?”

  “Any and all ego stroking is welcome, thank you.” Elle smiled around a mouthful of noodles. “In the meantime, I’ll just live vicariously through you. Tell me another story while I get a second one of these pink, whatever this is.” She held her glass aloft until she got the waiter’s attention.

  “I think it’s called a Cotton Candy Dream Date.” Jasmine laughed.

  “Whatever it is, it’s delicious.”

  “Let’s see, my new neighbor’s name is Kevin. I’ve been working up to asking him out. He’s tall, blond, and he has great abs.”

  “Hmm, he sounds delicious too.”

  They both laughed.

  “I’m really happy you have a yummy distraction. You’ve got such a stressful job I don’t know how you do it.” Elle couldn’t imagine working as an ER nurse. Going in every day with no idea of what trauma you might encounter. Somehow, Jasmine was able to compartmentalize and leave her work behind at the end of each day. Elle was sure the yoga and meditation were what kept Jasmine sane.

  “Everyone has stress in their life. It’s our modern condition, right?”

  “I guess.” Elle was swiftly finishing beverage number two. “My core samples are pretty high maintenance. I might go as far as to say they’re needy.”

  Jasmine laughed.

  “You and your rocks.”

  “The way you say that makes it sound sort of sexy.” Elle tipped her head from side to side playfully.

  Jasmine laughed with a mouth full of noodles, which made her sputter. She fanned herself. “Don’t make me laugh when I have a mouthful of soup.�
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  Elle decided not to have a third drink and instead switched to bottled water. There was a bit of a line at the front. The restaurant had gotten much more crowded. People clustered in small groups as they waited for tables. After an hour and a half, they decided to give theirs up. It was hard to linger with a hungry audience looking on. Jasmine’s shift started soon anyway. Elle stood to put on her jacket and a familiar profile caught her attention. She stopped mid-movement, one sleeve dangling limply from her arm.

  “What is it?” Jasmine tried to track Elle’s gaze.

  “Green Club is at the bar.” She was fairly certain that Jackson hadn’t seen her. The table where they’d been sitting adjoined a booth with a high back, making her position invisible from the bar. Plus, Jackson had her back to the room. She seemed very focused on whatever she was drinking.

  “You mean, from…”

  “Yeah, the other night.” Elle took one more sip of water. “You go ahead, I might just say hello on my way out.”

  “Okay, good luck.” Jasmine hugged her. “And be careful, but have some fun.”

  “Yes, Mother.”

  Elle was standing near Jackson and still she didn’t look up. The bar was as crowded as the rest of the place. A guy cut in front of Elle to order a drink, which gave her a moment to search in her purse for the green token. She was sure she still had it.

  Found it.

  Maybe it was the Cotton Candy Dream Date talking, but she was feeling brave despite the I-like-to-drink-alone vibe Jackson was giving off. She squeezed closer to where Jackson was seated and placed the token, green side up, on the bar. Jackson glanced at the coin and then turned, almost in slow motion. It was obvious that she was surprised to see Elle, but her expression was impossible to decipher—a good surprise or a bad one? Elle had the distinct impression that Jackson was very practiced at masking her feelings.

  “You know, this isn’t that sort of place.” Jackson cocked one eyebrow.

  Elle’s liquid-infused bravery wavered for an instant, but she rallied.

  “I never got the chance to use the token. I thought my credit might still be good.” That made Jackson smile and Elle relaxed a little.

  Another person tried to squeeze between them to get a drink, but Jackson blocked him with her arm. Elle moved into the small open space Jackson had created. Someone bumped her and she put her palm on Jackson’s thigh to catch herself.

  “Sorry, this place is getting crowded.”

  Jackson relished the warmth that radiated from Elle’s hand on her thigh. She didn’t mind the contact at all, and if it took a crowd to bring Elle closer, then bring on the masses. She stood and offered Elle her stool.

  Elle shook her head. “I’ve been sitting for a while.”

  “Can I buy you a drink?” Jackson sat back down and swiveled so that Elle had no choice in the tight, limited space near the bar except to stand between her legs.

  “Maybe just a soda. I’ve already hit my limit.”

  “That sounds promising.” She waved the bartender over so that she could order a soft drink for Elle. Damn, Elle was even prettier than she remembered. This was an unexpected second chance. Should she start this encounter by apologizing? Maybe they could both pretend their previous encounter at the club hadn’t happened.

  “I was here with a friend having dinner and I saw you. Are you…are you getting any food?”

  “No, just a drink.” Jackson needed to deal with the elephant in the room so that they could move forward. She swallowed. “Listen, I need to apologize about the other night.”

  “It’s okay, really.” Elle sipped the soda without making eye contact.

  The green token was still on the bar. Elle reached for it, possibly having second thoughts.

  “Maybe I should hang on to this.” Jackson covered the token before Elle could remove it.

  Elle shifted her stance, brushing the inside of Jackson’s thigh. The fleeting contact sent sparks to her crotch.

  The lights over the bar blinked and then everything went dark for a few seconds. Red emergency lighting flickered on, casting the café with an eerie underworld ambience. A wind advisory had been issued, and the power grid had probably gone offline to prevent fires. Although, that seemed more like corporate bullshit since there’d practically been a downpour the night before, so she figured they were way below an orange flag warning. But maybe the rain had been localized and the hills were still dry. At any rate, a power outage presented other opportunities.

  “The grid is probably down for the rest of the night.”

  “Damn. I walked here from my place.” Elle glanced around the café. Patrons were slowly closing tabs and leaving.

  “Why don’t I walk you home.” Jackson downed the last swig of her bourbon and stood up, not really waiting for an answer.

  “Um, okay, if it’s not out of your way.” Was Elle nervous? Elle had seemed so confident when she’d first approached Jackson at the bar.

  “Hey, I’m just offering to walk you home. No strings.” Jackson smiled. Depending on how long the walk would take, she had a little time to make her play for at least a few strings. “You can even hold on to this if it makes you feel better.” She offered the green token to Elle.

  Elle smiled. Her fingertips softly feathered against Jackson’s palm as she reclaimed the coin. She followed Elle to the door and into the pedestrian passageway. Elle was wearing a summer weight dress, some clingy fabric that highlighted the sensuous curve of her hips. She had a casual denim jacket on over the dress and a scarf of some glittery, sheer material—more for looks than warmth. The wind picked up, and Elle clutched the front of the jacket together as they crossed the open street for the next segment of covered sidewalk.

  “I was expecting to be home before it got chilly.” Elle crossed her arms, hugging herself.

  “Who can tell these days.” The daily weather swings could give you whiplash. It was best to just prepare for anything. Layering was the only way to deal with it.

  Elle glanced over at Jackson as they walked. Jackson kept a respectable amount of space between them, and Elle wondered if she should interpret that in some way or if Jackson was simply being polite. Jackson kept her hands in her jacket pockets at they continued down the pedestrian passageway toward her apartment.

  The sidewalk tunnels were crowded and dimly lit. People used tiny key fob sized flashlights as they headed home from work, or off to work, or just shopped. The small corner market had a generator that created an oasis of light. They passed through and kept going. A power outage used to be an opportunity to watch the stars but had become the time when other things happened. A siren sounded far away. The distant siren reminded her to be cautious.

  Something about Jackson’s quiet confidence made her feel safe.

  “It’s only another block or so.” Elle maintained the cordial distance as they walked.

  Jackson figured this night was going to end with a coin toss. She suspected things could go either way, hot or cold, and Elle was giving her no clues. Or maybe she just couldn’t read the signs any longer. That was a discouraging thought.

  The pedestrian traffic thinned as they entered the next block. This section of the street looked a little iffy, with some tent housing in the narrow spaces between the mid-rises.

  “We should cross the street at this exit.” Elle glanced over her shoulder as she pushed the door release.

  “Is something wrong?” Jackson felt suddenly protective.

  “It’s probably nothing. Earlier, when I walked to dinner, some guy tried to engage.” Elle started to cross the street. “I don’t really want to run into him. He seemed a little…off.”

  “Do you see him?” Jackson stopped walking. “Point him out to me.”

  “What?” Elle was a few steps ahead and turned to look at her. “Why?”

  “Point him out to me.”

  “Maybe he’s not even there…oh, wait, I think I see him.” Elle was searching the shadows between the buildings across the street
where someone was standing on the sidewalk looking in their direction.

  “Wait here.” Jackson strode across to where the man was standing in the red glow of emergency lights in the nearest building.

  Elle hugged herself as she watched Jackson. The man visibly stiffened as Jackson got closer. Did he know her? Like the first time Elle had seen Jackson, she was wearing a light jacket over a dark shirt, with slacks and boots that looked like the lower half of a uniform. And now she was confronting some strange man as if this was something she did all the time. This had to mean Jackson was in some branch of law enforcement, right?

  The exchange was brief. Jackson stood in the street with her hands braced on her hips as the man gathered his belongings and shuffled down the sidewalk away from Elle’s apartment. A few pedestrians and one small electric vehicle wove past where Jackson stood. She didn’t return to Elle until the man reached the corner and turned out of sight.

  “What did you say to him?” Elle crossed to Jackson, since her apartment was on that side of the street.

  “I gave him enough units of credit for tonight and directions for a shelter a few blocks away.” Jackson fell in step with Elle as they transitioned from the street to the sidewalk. “He won’t be back.”

  “How can you be so sure?” She studied Jackson’s face for a clue.

  “I know the type. He’ll find somewhere else to camp, trust me.”

  It seemed the conversation was over. Whatever it was Jackson had said to the man she wasn’t going to share.

  “Thank you.” Elle wasn’t sure what else to say.

  “You’re welcome.” Jackson looked so serious, despite the smile.

  Within only a few more steps, they were in front of her apartment. If she hadn’t been certain about inviting Jackson in, the hero display in the street had made the decision for her. Elle took Jackson’s hand and they entered the mid-rise building through a security door. Elle’s place was on the second floor. Low-wattage emergency lights gave the stairway a spooky amber glow. The air between them seemed to have warmed since Jackson came to her rescue. Elle was anxious to be rid of her denim jacket and scarf.