The shadow of the Mother of Cups is that she doesn’t know who she is if she’s not taking care of other people. Her identity is informed by her ability to nurture others, and setting boundaries will be more difficult for her than any of the other Court Cards. She is most comfortable putting the spotlight on others and can be reluctant to talk about herself. While she is a big energy, she is self-conscious about occupying too much space. She will give you the shirt off her back, but is that a good thing? She’s passing out on the airplane because she put on other people’s air masks before her own.
The inevitable eventuality the Mother of Cups lives with is that she will have to reckon with this co-dependence at some point, but rarely will it be a product of people convincing her to do so. It could be that her kids leave the nest, or she otherwise finds herself alone. A crisis or spiritual awakening could also lead her to seek fulfillment internally.
Father of Cups—The Broken Man
Worst dad award goes to this guy. The Father of Cups appears in readings in varying degrees of absence. He could be an alcoholic or addict, or suffer from mental illness or chronic depression. Maybe he physically abandoned his family. Maybe he never resolved shit with his dad and is rife with unhealed trauma. Or he could just be emotionally checked out. The result is the same: He is unreachable.
The tragedy of the Father of Cups is that he possesses great depth and an unlimited creative potential, but he never explored either. Maybe he couldn’t or wouldn’t. It’s possible that financial security, prestige, notions of masculinity or external expectations informed his decision to ignore his watery nature, but here we see the tax collected from neglecting your essence. The creativity rotted into destruction, and he is drowning in his own depths. The Father of Cups depicts emotionality collapsed in on itself.
It is possible that, outwardly, the Father of Cups seems very successful. He abandoned what he wanted and needed and was called to do in favor of what he thought he should do, and it’s likely he’s good at it. He is respected for his diplomacy, generosity and ability to manage a positive working environment. He may even show hints of a former, abandoned self at times, but it’s a drop of water on a sun-scorched landscape.
If I’m reading for the Father of Cups, the message is to rediscover yourself. You may have to dismantle a lot of long-standing structures in order to do so, but whatever mess may be made in this process carries less consequence than staying the course. If I’m reading for someone who has the Father of Cups in their life, the urging is to walk away. The shadow of this person is quicksand. They probably won’t change, and in the ways that matter, they are already gone.
PENTACLES FAM
Taurus / Virgo / Capricorn
You approach the sprawling Westchester mansion of the Pentacles Family, and it’s huge and tasteful at the same time. Ivy crawls up the stone walls and the landscaping is the kind of perfect that takes a team of people. You pull out your phone and look up the address to find you’re staring at a nine million dollar house. You decide you hate these people before you walk in the door. The Mother greets you and you’re surprised you weren’t let in by the help. She takes your coat and offers you a scotch. You love scotch. Fuck, that’s good scotch. You wonder if you’re underdressed. You feel like you should’ve taken your shoes off, but everyone else is wearing theirs. You wonder how the floors are so clean. Dinner is served in the formal dining room, and goddamnit it’s delicious. The Mother apologizes for the lack of meat and explains that she’s a vegetarian for ethical reasons and since she’s the one cooking, everyone else has to deal with it. You register that there is no maid and no personal chef. You’re also a vegetarian, also for ethical reasons, and you kind of love her for a second. The children are charming and mild-mannered, if not a little serious. The Son is an engineer, and the Daughter just found out she is Ivy-bound. The Father is older, distinguished and kind. They are curious about you. They ask engaging questions and, aside from occasional mentions of Montana mountain houses and summering in the Hamptons, you feel comfortable and connected to them. At the end of the meal, to toast the Daughter’s college acceptance, the Father disappears into the wine cellar and comes back with a very old and very expensive looking bottle of champagne, the delicacy of which is lost on you. Dinner lasts longer than you thought it would. You like everyone. The secret pill addiction, undertones of despair, miserable looking hired-help or kids playing nice to stay in the will that you were expecting to find—it’s just not there. They’re actually happy. On the way home, you call your therapist.
Daughter of Pentacles—The Nice Girl
The Daughter of Pentacles did everything right. From the AP classes and extracurriculars to the SAT prep and community service, she checks off the boxes of a well-rounded candidate. An adolescence-worth of diligence put her in a good position. Her resume is a masterpiece. When we meet the Daughter of Pentacles, she is contemplating her next move, and girl’s got options.
On paper she is perfect, and in her short life she has made a lot of mature decisions, but she is not an adult. Upon meeting, you may find her weighing the pros and cons of five different Ivy League schools, but if you ask what she’s majoring in you’ll find she’s undecided. She’s certainly better off for the success she set herself up for, but she doesn’t yet have the faculties to fully appreciate that. A little Pollyanna, a little doe-eyed, a little more style than substance, the Daughter of Pentacles stands on the solid ground of a sheltered childhood, gazing out at a successful adolescence.
Growing up will add street smarts to her considerable book smarts, but as it stands now she’s basic. She wears Uggs. She loves pizza. Her comforter is pink. Sometimes she breaks curfew, but for the most part she’s not making any waves. If asked to describe her, you would say she is a very nice girl. There is a distinct lack of character in the Daughter of Pentacles due to her naivety and youth. She’s not going to spice up your life, but your mom will love her.
This is the picture of many kids going off to college, sometimes investing or borrowing hundreds of thousands of dollars to study a subject their undeveloped, teenage brains decided they want to pursue for the rest of their life. College institutions normalize this insanity, long-woven into the fabric of the American Dream. But if it wasn’t, under what other circumstances would we give a teenager that much money and let them make a decision this big?
First and foremost, the Daughter of Pentacles is a student. She is open-minded and willing to consider new experiences. When she shows up in a reading it is an indication that there is a lesson available. Keep your eyes open for it. More literally, you may be called to go back to school or seek additional training, bring in a mentor or otherwise get learned.
Son of Pentacles—The Nerd
The Son of Pentacles and Son of Swords have much in common, and often they will show up alongside each other in a reading as different aspects of, or options for, the same person. The most notable difference is the pacing—where the Son of Swords is giving you anxiety because of his no chill, the Son of Pentacles is slow and steady. What he lacks in natural brilliance he makes up for in industriousness. He’s not going to push boundaries or take wild risks, and he’s probably not going to invent the next Internet. He will, however, accomplish his goal. A more sustainable energy than his Swords counterpart, he understands that some efforts just take time.
If the Daughter of Pentacles was waiting on or deciding between opportunities, then the Son of Pentacles got it and is grinding away. His professional aspirations are the backbone of his identity, the throughline through which all other priorities are set. He will work weekends and holidays if necessary. He doesn’t fly out of the office as soon as his shift is up. He’s not going to have another drink because he has work the next morning. He’s the responsible friend who makes you question your poor life choices.
There is an unglamorous reality that lives between the conception of a dream and its manifestation, and most of that reality is the Son of Pentacles. He gets flack for bein
g a stubborn, socially-awkward square, but he’s the one laughing all the way to the bank. Exceedingly diligent, dedicated and focused, there is nothing he cannot accomplish. Sometimes there is boring work required to harness a vision and root it into the ground. But it’s more boring to have a bunch of pipe dreams, unlaid plans and great ideas that die on the vine.
Mother of Pentacles—The Earth Goddess
You can find the Mother of Pentacles in the woods, communing with nature. She may be gathering herbs for a tincture, feeding the chickens or tending to her garden. A materially abundant but not materialistic person, her connection to the physical can be found in her strong relationship with nature, animals and other people.
She is a force who feels at home on the earth and in her body. She offers no apologies for her enjoyment of the finer things in life, sensual pleasures or prosperity. Staying grounded comes naturally to her, and her physical abundance is matched by her generosity and service. Well suited for the professions of teacher, herbalist, wildlife rehabilitator, farmer or maker, she will thrive in all areas that call for physical connection and elemental understanding. She is a born green witch.
Even if she’s married to a sugar daddy, she has a job or is otherwise self-supporting. Self-possession and independence are big motivators for the Mother of Pentacles, and she will preserve her sense of personal security and identity no matter the circumstance.
Motherhood and homesteading are second nature to this earth energy, and she derives fulfillment from tending to the world around her. The work of this extrovert will be finding out where she ends and others begin. Overwatering and drought are equally lethal, and there is a time where the thing you birthed no longer requires your care. Your children will leave home. The wild animal you rehabilitated will return to the woods. The vegetables you planted will be called to harvest. And you will still be there. It’s bittersweet and ripe for discovery.
Father of Pentacles—The Sugar Daddy
The card of CEOs, sugar daddies and presidents, wealth is the defining characteristic of the Father of Pentacles. And not only is he rich, but he’s been rich for long enough that he no longer freaks out about the fact that he’s rich. He’s chilling. He doesn’t walk into his handsome study and marvel at the rows of leather-bound first editions. He doesn’t pour himself a scotch from the crystal decanter on the marble table and giggle because he’s not drinking cheap whiskey out of the bottle. He’s settled comfortably into his abundant reality. An older masculine, he is probably past the height of his career and enjoying the fruits born from a lifetime of hard work. His distinction, authority and prosperity are a given. He wears it loosely and with ease.
For the Father of Pentacles, to love is to provide for, and a father figure like him means you will never go without. If you can’t make rent that month, if you really want to take that vacation, if you decide to go back to school, you are covered. Under certain circumstances, he may draft a document detailing the interest-free loan and proposed payment plan. That is for your sake, not his. His satisfaction with his life comes from the work he put into creating it, with money being only one of the many by-products. It is important that the people he loves both feel supported and appreciate the value of an honest day’s work.
Because of his strong connection to the material world, the Father of Pentacles will falter if his physical resources are compromised. Ill health, financial hardship or family problems will all threaten the foundation of this sturdy masculine. In cases like these, he risks collapse if he does not reach for the immaterial. Emotional support and spiritual connection open doors for further development and expansion.
WHAT THE FUCK ARE TAROT SPREADS?
A spread is the physical formation in which you lay out the cards. Each position indicates a different factor and further informs the meaning of the cards. There are more tarot spreads than there are tarot decks, ranging from general life spreads to excruciatingly specific. I do not use a different spread depending on the topic, mostly because I’m too dumb to memorize a thousand different spreads. And also because the cards will speak for themselves. There is no need to overly tailor a spread to match a question.
Do not be rigid about tarot spreads, if you feel like a card wants to say more, or you want to dive deeper into a certain aspect, pull another card. I use spreads as a way of initiating a conversation with the tarot, but the conversation continues over the course of a reading. Sometimes a reading ends with all seventy-eight cards on the table. Sometimes, the initial spread speaks for itself. Usually, it is somewhere in the middle.
How you lay out the cards is a matter of preference. Some people pull cards for a spread one at a time, or pull the cards face-down and reveal them one at a time. In my experience, how a spread all connects together informs the reading from the very beginning, so I pull them all at once and let them speak as a unit as well as individually. I know readers who will do multiple spreads over the course of one reading, discarding the cards covering a topic once it is finished. Either they will put them back in the deck and shuffle again to address another matter, or just pull from the remaining cards in the deck. My approach is a holistic one, keeping all cards on the table and letting them layer on top of each other as the reading progresses. Experiment with different ways of laying out the cards during a reading and see what feels most natural to you.
When you introduce a spread, pay attention to what the cards look like together, who is facing what, etc. Is a card looking off into nothing? Pull another card. If a dark card appears, I will pull additional cards to dig to the root of the issue. So much of tarot is connecting with your intuition, and this is a place where a formula is constricting rather than useful. With that said, there are some spreads that I have found to be effective jumping-off points when starting a reading.
Everything Spread
This is my most used and trusted spread. In a general reading, the spread invites in several aspects of life and identifies where they most impact a person’s life. If inquiring about something specific, it illustrates the layers and effects of that particular situation. Mind, body and spirit can be seen as the ego, superego and id, or the conscious, subconscious and unconscious. In these cards, we are digging through layers of awareness. Mind is the forefront of our consciousness, whereas body and then spirit increase in vulnerability and depth. Past, present and future are the external circumstances of life, what the person is manifesting as a result of their internal environment. The external and internal snapshot of this spread provides a holistic view of a situation. When I use this spread, I view each of the six cards as a doorway through which more can be revealed by dialogue with the querist and additional cards.
Ellipse Spread
This “quick and dirty” spread is one I use when doing a reading on one specific question or situation. That thing or person that we cannot stop thinking about no matter what we do? This spread is good for that. It allows for complete immersion into the situation, examines it from every angle and also provides specific instruction on what to do and the likely outcome from the recommended action.
Chakra Spread
Chakras are seven energy centers in the body that correspond to different physical, emotional and spiritual functions. Beginning at the base of the spine and going up to the top of the head, it is believed that this is the direction in which energy flows into and through our bodies. When something occurs that disrupts or blocks this circulation it can lead to maladies of all sorts. The Chakra spread is useful if you or the person you are reading for has a question about their body, or is feeling the physical impact of a mental or spiritual block. Chakras can be either overcharged or undercharged, and either will result in imbalance. A good spread to use preceding Reiki or bodywork, as it gives a map of where attention is most needed. Read more about Chakras here to here.
HOW THE FUCK DO I GIVE A READING?
Regardless of how much preparation you do, the best way to get to know your cards is to use them. It is impossible to build confiden
ce in yourself as a reader without doing this. I will repeat: You’re not gonna learn to read for people without reading for people. Interact with your cards in this way as soon as possible. Being over-prepared can lead to over-thinking and make it all the more terrifying. Luckily, when you tell people you read tarot, specifically for free when you’re just starting out, you will be bombarded with opportunities to practice.
I gave a reading to a girlfriend the first day I received my deck. Yes, I stumbled over their meanings, consulted the guidebook and said uhh a lot—but the message of the cards was clear regardless. She just got out of a relationship, and it was the kind of breakup that wrecks your shit. The can’t-get-out-of-bed, don’t-want-to-eat, wake-up-to-pure-misery, life-is-meaningless kind of breakup. The cards showed another romantic interest entering her life shortly thereafter, an unfathomable concept when you’re in the depths of breakup hell. It suggested she let the breakup be clean—no late night texting, no trying to get back together shenanigans—so she could be as healed as possible for this next person soon entering her life.
WTF Is Tarot Page 15
