Keith was home already. His supervisors had sent him home early, when it was still safe enough to drive. Raven liked Keith. He was one of the kindest people she’d ever met. But she didn’t want to talk to him. She couldn’t talk to anyone. She just wanted quiet.
She would go to the tree. Not the giant mother tree that was down in the bottomland. She would have no protection from the rain there. She would go to her second favorite tree, the one Ellis had talked about the day River and Jasper arrived. The oak that was partly hollow but still very much alive.
Raven walked down the hill to the tree. It was barely visible from the master bedroom window. She had to get inside before Keith saw her. She stood on the roots and climbed into the trunk’s hole. She sat on the soft earthy floor of the little room. Ellis said the tree had put up four kinds of walls to protect itself from the spreading damage. Raven liked that, sitting in a tiny one-room cabin that the tree had made inside itself.
A gust of wind whined through the oak’s hollow. But she stayed dry. She leaned against the tree wall. When she curled her body inward, her thighs pushed uncomfortably against her belly.
Because it was bigger.
She didn’t want to think about it. She closed her eyes. She kept her attention on the outside drum of rain, whooshing treetops, creaking limbs, the moan of wind when it hit the hollow trunk just right.
“Raven!”
She opened her eyes. She had fallen asleep. Ellis was peering into the cavity doorway. She looked upset.
“How did you know I was in here?”
“Max,” Ellis said loudly over the wind.
“How did she know?”
Ellis handed a wet piece of paper down to her. It was from the little notebooks Ellis and Maxine used to say things they couldn’t translate into gestures.
The first line said, Do you know where Raven is?
Maxine answered, She’s not in the house?
No. And not in the barn house. I’m worried.
Look inside the hollow oak.
What???
Look there, Maxine wrote. You need to talk to her. Really TALK to her.
Raven crumpled the note and let it fall.
“What did she mean?” Ellis asked. “Is something wrong?”
Is something wrong? Her whole life had been a giant wrong.
“Please talk to me,” Ellis said. “You can tell me.”
Raven wiped her hands down her face.
“Why are you crying, sweetheart?” Ellis said. “Please tell me.”
She would have to tell her. And better now when no one else was there to hear.
“My mother—Audrey . . .”
Ellis looked surprised that she’d called her by her first name. She’d never done that before.
“She tricked me,” Raven said. “She lied to me.”
Ellis had nothing to say. Because of course Audrey had lied. Everyone knew that. Even Raven had come to understand Mama had told her lies. But she used to think they were necessary lies. Good lies.
She sat up higher inside the tree. “Do you know what I used to believe?”
Ellis leaned into the tree to listen over the wind and rain.
“I believed my father was the spirit of a raven. She told me I was a miracle made by an earth spirit that embodied all ravens that had ever lived on Earth. He created me with her spirit. I actually believed I was only half-human.”
Ellis was trying not to cry.
“No one knows my real name,” Raven said. “It isn’t Raven Lind.”
“What is your name?” Ellis asked.
“Daughter of Raven. I didn’t have a human last name because I was the child of an earth spirit. My mother mostly called me Daughter.”
“Why don’t you come out and we’ll talk in the barn? River is having lunch with Keith and Max in the house.”
Raven heard her, but the words didn’t register. “Do you know what else she told me? She said a person who’s half-human can’t make a baby. Have you ever heard of reproductive isolation, when two unlike species can’t make offspring?”
“Yes,” Ellis said.
“It was all a trick,” Raven said. “She wanted another baby. She kept telling me to have sex with boys I met at school.”
Tears dripped down Ellis’s cheeks.
“She said my father the raven would want me to enjoy the act of sex. She said I didn’t have to worry about making a baby. She kept me locked up all those years, but suddenly she let me go out with boys anytime I wanted.”
Raven picked up the crumpled paper and opened it. “Maxine knew. I’m such an idiot.”
“What are you saying?” Ellis asked.
“Do you know what happened when we were in the nursery a little while ago?”
“What?”
“I felt a baby move inside me. A baby. There’s a baby inside me.”
The despicable crime was right there for her to see, reflected in Ellis’s horrified reaction.
A sob burst out of Raven. Out of her very soul. And another. She could hardly talk through the crying. “It isn’t mine. It’s hers. It’s Audrey Lind’s baby. She worked on getting that baby since I was a little girl. I grew up too fast. She always said that. And she kept saying she wanted another baby. I have this horrible person’s baby inside me!”
Raven covered her face and cried against the tree. She smelled so good. A Mother Tree. The kind of tree you could ask for things. Or so she had been taught.
Dear Mother Tree, make me hollow like you are. Take the baby away. Take Mama out of me. Make the place where she was into a pretty little room like you have. I want to live there forever.
Hands lifted her. Strong arms. Ellis was pulling her out of the hollow, and Raven didn’t stop her.
Ellis pressed Raven against her body. Raven thought she must remember the sweet smell and feel of her mother from when she was a baby. Because Ellis was exactly what she wanted. Better even than the tree.
Raven had never cried so hard.
“You’ll be okay,” Ellis said. “Go ahead and cry. You need to. It’s good to let it out. I love you so much. I love you. My sweet baby. Everything will be all right.”
A quieter cycle of the hurricane hushed the woods. The gusts calmed, and rain pattered gently.
Raven wiped her hands over her face. It felt swollen.
Ellis placed her hands on Raven’s cheeks. “Sweetheart . . . are you sure? Are you certain you felt a baby? Could it be—”
“It’s a baby. Maxine knew. She saw me throwing up one day. I thought I was sick from missing Washington.”
She had vomited the day Sondra came to her house with her sister’s letter. That had made Raven think it was normal to be sick with unhappiness.
“You haven’t had your period?”
“I got a few spots once. I thought my body had changed from everything that happened. Especially after the car accident.”
“Do you mind if I look?”
Raven pushed back against the tree and lifted her shirt.
Ellis caressed the bulge. She was trying not to cry. “I thought you were finally gaining weight. But this definitely looks like a baby. If you felt the baby move for the first time, you must be about six months along.”
“It happened at the end of March.”
Spring break from school. She and Jackie had made love many times that week. What would he say if he found out? She’d told him she couldn’t get pregnant.
She was crying again.
“It’s okay. It’s okay. We’ll figure this out. Who is the father?”
“Jackie. Jack Danner.”
“Is he a boyfriend . . . a friend . . . ?”
“He’s my boyfriend. But maybe he gave up on me by now. And he’ll think I tricked him like Mama did. I told him I couldn’t have babies.”
“He’ll understand, won’t he? How long had you been together?”
“I’ve known him since I was seven. I love him more than anyone in the world.”
Ellis looked aston
ished. “Why didn’t you tell me this? Have you had any contact with him?”
Raven shook her head.
“You poor girl! You should have asked to use my phone. Or we could have bought you your own.”
“I’ve never been allowed to use phones. Mama always said they were bad. And River is addicted to his.”
Ellis unzipped her raincoat pocket and took out her phone. “As you know, I’m not keen on phones either. But this . . . this is definitely a situation where a phone is very good. You’re going to call him right now.”
“Here?”
“We only get good phone reception outside because of the metal roof on the house and barn. And the rain has let up. You’d better hurry before more rain blows through.” She held the phone out to her. “I’ll leave to give you privacy.”
“I don’t know his number.”
“What are his parents’ names? I’ll call information.”
“His mother is Rose Danner. His father died.”
“Does his mother work on Saturdays?”
“No, she’s a teacher.”
“Shoot, I just realized something.” She slid the phone back into her pocket. “I need to tell you something before you call. I want you to hear it from me, not from Jack or his mother.”
“What?”
“There’s been a lot going on out there. I haven’t told you because I didn’t want to upset you. But you’ve been told enough lies.”
“They found her body?”
“Yes. They had to do an autopsy to make sure there wasn’t foul play.”
Raven imagined doctors cutting up Mama’s body. It made her sick. She squeezed her eyes closed and put her hands over them to stop seeing it.
“They had to know what killed her,” Ellis said. “They were worried Sondra or someone else might have been involved in her death.”
Raven opened her eyes. “Aunt Sondra?”
“There’s been an investigation to make sure she didn’t aid her sister’s crime.”
“Did they find out what killed Audrey?”
“She had heart disease—similar to what killed her mother. But she probably died of hypothermia. She removed her clothing, lay down in a hollow she’d excavated, and pulled dead leaves over her body to hide it.”
Raven easily saw her doing that. Vividly. More tears mixed with the rain on her face.
“I’m sorry,” Ellis said. “I’m sorry I had to tell you that. But we’ve seen what hiding the truth has done to our family.”
“Where is Audrey now?” Raven asked.
“I don’t know.”
Raven was surprised she wasn’t more upset that she didn’t know where the body was. She didn’t know what she felt about Audrey Lind. What River had told her at lunch on Wednesday haunted her. To think that poor little boy blamed himself all those years for the abduction. For what Audrey Lind had done. It tore at Raven’s heart.
Ellis held her by the shoulders. “Your boyfriend and his mother will probably know these things. The story of what Audrey did has been a big deal in their community. It’s on the TV news and in all the papers. That’s why no one talks about you going back. I doubt you’d want to be out there right now.”
Raven could easily envision it. Everyone at school talking about it. Poor Jackie. How strange that must be for him.
“Maybe we could fly Jack out here for a visit,” Ellis said. “I’m tight on money, but Sondra can easily pay out of your inheritance.”
“He could come here?”
“Is he in school?”
“He’s a senior in high school.”
“That could be a problem. But ask him, if we can get him on the phone.” She huddled closer. “We’d better call. Here comes more rain.”
Ellis typed things into the phone and finally spoke to someone. She asked Raven the town and road. Then she said, “Yes, please connect me.” She handed Raven the phone. “It’s ringing. Wait for her to answer.”
“Hello?” Ms. Danner said.
It was strange to hear her voice through the metal-and-glass machine in her hand.
“This is Raven,” she said.
“Raven! Oh gosh. Oh dear. I’m tearing up. Hold on a minute.”
Raven started crying, too.
Ellis walked away to give her privacy.
After a few sniffles, Ms. Danner said, “How are you, darling?”
“I’m okay. I miss you.”
“Boy, do we miss you! Where are you calling from?”
“Florida. I live with my mom now.”
My mom. She couldn’t believe she’d said that. Ms. Danner started crying again.
“Let me get Jackie,” she said. “He’s upstairs.”
The flutters in Raven’s stomach weren’t the baby.
The wind blew hard again. She was afraid she wouldn’t be able to hear Jackie. She climbed inside the tree while Ms. Danner called Jackie to the phone.
“Raven?” Jackie said.
“Yes.” The word came out as a sob.
“Where are you?” He was trying not to cry.
“Florida. At my mother’s house.”
“Is that okay? Do you like it there?”
“It’s getting better. It was really hard at first.”
“I can imagine.”
“I’ve missed you so much,” she said.
“Me too.”
“How’s school?” she asked.
“Horrible without you.”
“Is everyone talking about me?”
“Yes. And that makes it worse. I even had a reporter try to ask me questions about you.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault!”
“Jackie . . . ?”
“What?”
“Do you think you could fly out here? My mother said my inheritance from Audrey could pay for it.”
“Yeah! When?”
“Now.”
“Now? Like, today?”
“No. But after we get the ticket.”
“I’d have to ask my mom about missing school.”
“I need to talk to you. I have to tell you something.”
“What?”
She wanted to see him when she told him. And touch him.
“Raven, tell me! What’s wrong?”
She had to tell him. Maybe it was better that she couldn’t see him if he got angry.
“Audrey Lind—the woman who stole me—she told me lies. She told me I’m different from other people.”
“Well, you are,” he said, trying to be cheerful. “In the best ways possible.”
“She told me my body is different. She said it wouldn’t make babies.”
Silence.
She slid down the tree to the ground. “I’m pregnant with our baby.”
“Oh my god,” he whispered.
“I didn’t know until today. I felt it move. She lied to me. I’m sorry, Jackie. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize! It was her.”
“Are you upset?”
“I’m surprised, but not mad, if that’s what you mean. I’m more worried about you—that you have to go through this . . . on top of everything else . . .” He went quiet, too emotional to speak.
She couldn’t either.
“I’m coming out there,” he said. “I can miss some school. I’m sure my mom will be okay with that.”
“She can come, too, if she wants. And maybe Huck and Reece. I can get tickets for everyone.”
“Huck’s too busy at college to take time off. And Reece . . .”
“What?”
“There’s sad news. His mother died in July. He lives with us now.”
“Reece lives at your house?”
“He didn’t have anywhere else to go. He doesn’t have enough money to rent a place. He’s really down.”
“Please bring him!”
“I wish I could. But he has two jobs now. He’s trying to save money for college.”
Ellis peered into the tree. “The wind is really picking up out
here,” she said. “I want you to get out of this tree. It’s making me very nervous.”
“Who is that?” Jackie said.
“Ellis. My mother.”
“What did she say about the wind?”
“There’s a hurricane here.”
“I saw that on the news. I had no idea you were in it.”
“Please come out,” Ellis said.
Raven heard the roar of the wind, felt it shudder the tree walls.
“I have to go,” Raven said. “I’m inside a hollow tree, and the wind is really strong.”
“You’re inside a tree? In a hurricane?”
“Yes.”
“I have to tell Reece this. He’ll love it.”
“Give him a big hug for me.”
“I will—even if I get teased.”
“I love you, Jackie.”
Silence, maybe because he was crying.
“I was afraid I’d never hear you say that again,” he said. “I was afraid to keep being in love with you.”
“You are still?”
“I love you as much as ever.”
“I can’t wait to see you.”
“I know. Give the baby a kiss for me.”
“That might be difficult.”
“It was a joke. Get out of that tree before it blows down.”
She handed the phone to Ellis and climbed out of the oak into the squall of rain and wind.
“How did he take the news?” Ellis asked as they walked to the house.
“He’s not upset. He said he loves me.”
Ellis took her hand and squeezed it. “I’m happy for you. Did you ask him if he wants to visit?”
“He’s coming. As soon as we get tickets.”
A strong gust made branches snap overhead. They ran back to the house, laughing at how drenched they were as they arrived on the porch.
“Talking to Jack has done you good,” Ellis said. “I’m glad I’ll get to meet him soon.”
“You’ll love him. He’s the sweetest person.”
“Raven . . .” She put her hand softly on her cheek. “I see how much you love him. And out of that love came this baby. You and he and your love made this child. Nothing and no one else. Do you understand?”
“I’ll try to.”
She kissed Raven’s cheek.
“Do you mind if I start calling you Mom?”
The Light Through the Leaves Page 38
