Dating the DILF: A Single Dad Romance

by Amali Rose

  “I wanted to find a partner.” It’s my standard reply, but for the first time, I consider if it’s the whole truth. “I felt like my life wasn’t my own anymore. Maybe the show gave me a chance to run away for a while.” The admission guts me, knowing I’m in this position right now because of my own cowardice.

  “You’re a good guy, Miles, and I am sorry for what happened. But this was a job for me.” She frowns, a small crinkle appearing between her eyes. “As desperately as you needed an escape, that’s how desperately I’ve been trying to get my break. It was never supposed to get so complicated.” Her voice gently rebukes.

  She’s right. If I had just gone along with everyone and chosen one of the girls, none of this would have happened. It all comes back to me and my stubbornness. The entire shitshow that has been my life for the last year is entirely my own fault. All of the crap that Charlie has been dealing with, is on me.

  “You okay, there?” Aspen gently prods.

  “Yeah. Just ready to get this over with.”

  “Okay, guys.” Jeremy, the host of this joke, takes a seat on an armchair between us. “The segment with all of the girls will make up the majority of the show, what we film now will be edited to fill the last twenty minutes.” He looks across at me, his face deadly serious. “We’ll go through the timeline from the show and, Miles, you’ll explain yourself, tell us how you regret the way you handled everything, how great the show is, how wonderful Aspen is, yada yada yada.” He rolls his eyes and, again, I question the morality of the people involved in this show and the disregard they show for people’s lives and reputations.

  My phone vibrates as someone in the studio screams, “Two minutes, people.” I quickly check it, and when I see Charlie’s name, I have to swallow down my guilt.

  I didn’t tell her I was coming here today. She thinks I flew to Los Angeles for a conference. I hate lying to her, but I know she wouldn’t approve. She’d tell me it was unnecessary and will just fan the flame when we should be leaving it to die.

  But I can’t let her career be a casualty of my fuckups and this is the fastest way I can put a stop to the treatment she’s been receiving.

  It ends today.

  The heat from the studio lights has left me with a sheen of sweat and a petite makeup girl pats some powder onto my face as people rush around us, preparing to start filming. From the scowl on her face, I assume she’s a friend of Sophie’s.

  “Right, are you two ready?” Jeremey looks between Aspen and me. “Let’s make some magic.”

  Thirty minutes later I’m white-knuckling it. I have been bombarded with footage showing me sweet-talking a group of women, interspersed with behind-the-scenes footage of me complaining mercilessly about them to Sophie. I can’t help but think that when they told me there were cameras everywhere, I never believed that there were cameras everywhere.

  There’s no point being honest. The party line is that I’m an asshole and that’s what I’m here to confirm. No one is interested in knowing the truth about the show and how I was lied to.

  “Jeremy, I am horrified by my behavior on the show. I have no excuse for what I did. I do want to make it clear that I never had a sexual relationship with Sophie Stevens, the makeup artist.” Because I will not throw Sophie under the bus. “But that doesn’t mean I didn’t cross a line and behave inappropriately. I should have been opening up to the women who were there looking for love rather than Sophie.”

  I almost choke on the words, the idea that any of those women cared what I was doing is laughable.

  A tearful Aspen sniffles across from me. “That means so much to me, Miles. I can’t lie, I’m still devastated that you behaved the way you did, but knowing you weren’t sleeping with her, and you admitting your behavior was awful, well, I feel like I can start to move on now.” She gives me a watery smile.

  If this woman doesn’t win an Oscar at some point in the future, I’ll eat my own shoe.

  “Miles.” Jeremy turns to me. “We all know you have a new lady love. Does this change of heart have anything to do with her?” A smarmy smile spreads across his face.

  This is it. This is where I clear the air and make things right for Charlie.

  “It does, Jeremy. I have been seeing a wonderful woman for a few months now, and she’s helped me realize how poorly I treated everyone involved with the show. She’s the one who urged me to make amends.”

  I almost laugh at that. Charlie would burn this studio to the ground before she would apologize to anyone involved in this mess. But when I look to my right and see Harvey standing beside the director, nodding approvingly, I know I’ve done the right thing.

  “Well, we did try to get Charlotte to appear on the show tonight.” They did? She never mentioned that. “But it seems she is a little on the shy side.” He chuckles and I force a laugh, wondering where this is headed. “Fortunately for us, her mother was more than happy to come and talk to us, so please welcome Karoline Reed.”

  A tall woman who looks to be in her mid-forties materializes from behind me and takes a seat next to Aspen. Jeremey greets her warmly, but I remain frozen. When I swing around to look at Harvey, his eyes glitter with malice and a smug sneer is painted across his face.

  “Karoline, thank you for joining us tonight, can you explain why you wanted to be here?”

  I examine her, trying to see any similarities to Charlie, but I can’t. While Charlie’s features are soft and effortlessly beautiful, this woman is the opposite. Heavy makeup covers her face and her hair is an unflattering peroxide color. She looks old and tired, when I know for a fact she is only in her mid-forties.

  If I didn’t know the harm she had inflicted on Charlie, I would pity her.

  “Of course, Jeremy, thank you for the opportunity. I’m here because I’m worried about my baby girl. Charlotte is a weak girl who is easily manipulated. Knowing the type of man he is.” She tosses a dirty look my way. “And seeing the way he has allowed her name to be dragged through the mud, I’m afraid she’s going to be severely hurt—”

  “Wait a minute,” I interrupt. Weak and easily manipulated. Does she even know her daughter?

  “No, you wait a minute,” Karoline bites back. “I’ve known men like you my entire life. You’re scum and you’ll use my baby, take her for whatever you can get, and then disappear leaving her to pick up the pieces.”

  “You don’t even know me.”

  “Of course I do. We all know you. You gave us a one-way ticket into your life when you put yourself on this show. Charlotte deserves better than you.”

  She’s got me there.

  Jeremy holds up his hands in an effort to diffuse the tension. “How about we ask Charlotte herself?”

  My stomach drops and I glance around the studio expecting Charlie to appear. My relief at her nonappearance is short-lived, however.

  “Do we have Charlotte on the line?” Jeremy directs his question to the director who gives him a nod. “Charlotte, are you there?”

  “Uh, yes. Who is this?” Her voice is tight with suspicion and I think I might hurl.

  “My name is Jeremy Pinoit, Charlotte. I’m here tonight with your mother and your boyfriend.”

  “Tonight? It’s the middle of the day, what are you talking about? Who is this?”

  I hear giggling in the background and despite the tension radiating through me, the sound of my daughter’s laughter calms me a little.

  “Charlotte, I’m the host of Dating the DILF, the show your boyfriend appeared on last year. I believe you’re familiar with it.”

  She snorts out a laugh. “Yeah, I’m familiar with that piece of shit.”

  Jeremy’s face drops and I have to bite back my first sincere laugh since I stepped foot in this studio.

  “Uh, well, we’re here filming the reunion show and we have your mother here who is expressing her concern about your relationship with Miles.”

  “I bet she is.” She scoffs. “Miles, are you there?”

  “Yeah,” I force mys
elf to answer. “I’m here, Chicago.”

  There’s complete silence in the studio as we all listen, waiting to hear what she’ll say next.

  Instead, all we get is a dial tone when she ends the call.

  My hand stills on the doorknob and I take a deep fortifying breath before I open it. I’ve spent the entire trip home trying to get in touch with Charlie, but she has rejected every one of my calls. She sent me one quick message that contained two words. Lulu’s fine.

  I spent the four-hour flight home reliving the afternoon, choking on my regret and wondering when I’m going to stop making such shitty life choices.

  It feels like so much longer than twelve hours since I last saw her and I need to get my hands on her more than I need my next breath.

  The house is silent when I enter, and I check my watch seeing it’s just after nine. After a quick sweep of the lower level, I find no one, so I make my way upstairs and head straight for Lulu’s room.

  The door is slightly ajar, and I peer in, seeing Lulu curled up in bed. She’s fast asleep, clutching Pongo, her stuffed penguin, her gentle snores filling the room.

  I push the door open farther and find Charlie asleep on the floor, a pillow under her head and the ratty open-weaved blanket my mom crocheted for me when I was a kid, covering her.

  I take a moment to enjoy the view. The connection they have developed these last few months surprised me, but I think it shocked Charlie even more. I still remember the look of horror on her face when I mentioned I had a kid. She tried to hide it, but it was painfully obvious she had one foot out the door the second it came up.

  Fast-forward to this morning when the two of them practically kicked me out of the house so they could start their “girl’s day.” If I’ve messed this up, I’ll never forgive myself.

  Moving quietly through the room, I kneel down next to Charlie and gently shake her awake. Her eyes pop open with fright, her body taut, but she relaxes the moment she realizes it’s me.

  Without a word, she gets up and walks out of the room.

  Sighing, I move to the bed and lean down to place a kiss on Lulu’s head. She rolls over and mumbles something about fudging firecrackers and I hold my breath, praying she won’t wake up.

  When she burrows back into her pillow and her breathing evens out, I turn and follow Charlie downstairs.

  I find her pacing between the kitchen and living room.

  “How was your conference?” she snaps.

  “I’m sorry.” I slump against the island bench.

  “You lied to me.” Her chin wobbles and her eyes shine with unshed tears.

  “I was trying to protect yo—”

  “I don’t need you to protect me, Miles. We’re supposed to be a team. I’m so fucking mad at you right now.”

  “It wasn’t supposed to happen like that.” I hate how defensive I sound. “Harvey wasn’t going to back off until I agreed to do it, so why keep fighting it?”

  She stops pacing and turns to me. “And how exactly did that turn out for you?”

  “I fucked up, okay?” I fold my arms across my chest. “I was trying to fix everything. I don’t want to lose you because my life is a joke and that rubs off on you. How long would you stick around if being with me causes your life to come crashing down.”

  Her mouth drops and she’s practically vibrating with rage.

  “Who the hell do you think you are, Miles Kent? Do you really think I’m that shallow? Or that I’m not completely in this?” She storms toward me and the look on her face warns me not to interrupt her.

  She stops in front of me, her hands on her hips. “I’m not looking for a fucking fairy tale, Miles, or some protector. I want a partner. What we have is real and messy, but it’s incredible.” Her voice breaks and I watch her swallow down a sob. “I’m prepared to risk it all for you and Lulu. Everything I want is different now, because of you two.” She pauses, biting her lip. “But you need to let me fight my own battles and make my own choices. You need to settle for less than perfection, because that is bullshit and it doesn’t exist. And I’m so scared that you’re going to be so busy chasing something unattainable, you’re going to ruin what we already have. I’m here, Miles, and I’m ready to love you through every damn storm, not just the perfect moments.”

  For the first time all day, I feel like I can breathe and I take a step toward her, only to be rebuffed when she steps back.

  “But right now, I’m pissed, and you need to just let me be pissed.” She snatches up her purse and heads toward the front door. “I’ll call you when I’m ready to talk.”

  “What’s up, Dad?” He’s sitting at the dining table, sucking down a beer and watching me load the dishwasher. I can hear Lulu giggling in her playroom down the hall and I let the sound soothe me.

  “Have you spoken to her yet?”

  “No.” It’s been six days since she walked out on me and I’ve done my best to give her the space she needs but it’s fucking hard.

  I close the dishwasher and start it before grabbing a beer from the refrigerator and joining him at the table. “How did you do it, Dad?”

  “Do what?”

  “You and Mom. You guys had this perfect relationship, you never fought. If we’re already having problems, maybe this isn’t right for either of us.” It kills me to even consider the idea.

  “Jesus Christ, Miles, you’re smarter than this.” He points his beer bottle at me. “My relationship with your mother was exactly as it was supposed to be, and that’s far from perfect. We fought all the time.”

  “No, you didn’t.” I scoff.

  “Of course, we did. We just made a point of not doing it in front of you boys. Do you know how many times she made me sleep on the couch in the den? Why do you think I always had such a bad back?” He laughs.

  “You always seemed so happy.”

  “We were happy. Nobody made me happier than your mom, but she had an awful temper. We both did.” He shrugs as though he’s not crushing every notion I ever had about relationships.

  “That girl of yours is a keeper, but you fucked up, just like a million men before you. If you’re lucky, she’ll give you another chance. If you’re not, then you’ll crawl on your hands and knees and beg for forgiveness until you wear her down, because what you two have doesn’t come along every day, and when it does, you fight for it.”

  I nod, letting his words sink in and I hope he’s right. That I haven’t fucked this up beyond repair.

  “She’s been FaceTiming with Lulu every day, did you know that?”

  “She has?” I had no idea.

  “Every day at lunchtime.” He grins at me. “I think you’re going to be fine.”

  “Daaaaaadddyyy! C’mere!” I roll my eyes and Dad chuckles at Lulu’s demanding tone.

  “Go check on her, I’m going to finish this and then I’ll head home.”

  I clap him on the back, an unspoken thank you, and make my way to check on Lulu.

  “What’s up, kid?”

  “My baby’s head come off.” She holds a decapitated doll up to me.

  “It just popped off? All by itself?”

  “Yup.”

  I choose to believe her because, really, who wants to believe their child is a doll decapitator?

  Fifteen minutes later, I walk back into the kitchen expecting to find Dad ready to take off. Instead, I find him still seated at the table, hunched over with sweat beading his brow and his face pale and clammy.

  “Dad?” I rush over to him. “Dad, are you okay?”

  He’s struggling to breathe and despite the panic that is setting in, I do my best to stay calm for him.

  “Dad, I’m going to call an ambulance. It’s going to be fine, okay? Don’t worry about a thing.”

  He blinks once, long and slow and a feeling of dread knots my stomach.

  Everything is going to be fine. It has to be.

  My eyes burn and hot tears trickle down my cheeks as I watch Chloe begging Lucifer not to leave her before th
ey share their final kiss.

  I hug the cushion closer to my chest, trying to calm myself. What the hell was I thinking watching this?

  I grab the remote and search for The Big Bang Theory, needing something light and funny. I find the episode where it’s flashing back to how Leonard and Sheldon became roommates, one of my favorites, and I settle back into the sofa. I’m craving something sweet, but I finished my last pint of ice cream earlier, and I’m down to my last pack of candy, so I’m rationing the M&M’s.

  I glance at my phone sitting on the coffee table, wanting to call Miles, just as I have every minute for the last six days. I had no intention of leaving it this long. I just needed a day to lick my wounds and indulge in some self-pity. But all day Sunday I kept replaying the moment I was ambushed on the phone. The sick feeling of panic and betrayal brought my childhood rushing back to me and all of my fears came roaring back to life.

  How could he do something like that without talking to me? Let me be blindsided that way?

  I pick the phone up and scroll to the last message from Miles, sent this morning.

  Miles: Do you ever wonder if parallel universes really exist?

  Miles: I hope I find you in every one of them.

  I bite my lip in an effort to stop the tears, fighting every one of my instincts that are telling me to call him. My deliberation is cut short when I’m interrupted by loud banging on my door.

  A sliver of fear shoots through me until I hear Addy’s voice calling out, demanding I open the door.

  I jump up, the urgency in her voice feeding my apprehension. When I fling the door open, she doesn’t give me a chance to say a word.

  “Grab your keys and purse, Robert’s been taken to the hospital.”

  The automatic doors open, and we rush through into the emergency room waiting area. There are people everywhere and the organized chaos kicks my anxiety into overdrive.

  Addy assured me that Grayson would be waiting for us and I scan the room searching him out. When I find him, my heart sinks. Gone is playful Gray with the unmistakable glint of mischief in his eyes. Instead, he’s standing by the elevators, slumped against the wall with his red-rimmed eyes glued to his phone.