by C. A. Harms
“I’ll have to see if my boss will give me some time off.”
“I think if you ask him nicely anything is possible.” I kiss her one last time before backing away and allowing her to get inside her car. It is a difficult task because the second I feel the distance between us, my hands shake to reach out for her once again.
She offers me a gentle wave just before placing her car in reverse and backing out of her space. I watch her drive off toward the main road and I know the only way I’ll be happy is if I know she is safely tucked away inside her apartment.
So I follow distantly behind in my own car and pull over to the side of the road when I see her park in an open space across from her building. Flipping my lights off, I wait until she gathers her bag, closes her door and hurries across the street.
God, she is fucking beautiful.
I place my hand to my chest and press as if that will soothe the ache I felt. I want to go to her, I need it, only I can’t. I have to figure out a way to get the answers my father needs and keep her too.
Chapter Seven
Blair
I climb out of the shower and wrap myself in my worn out light blue robe. It really has seen better days, but it’s so soft and I love it too much to throw it away. Just as I step out of the bathroom and into the small hallway that leads to my room the door buzzer rings, indicating I have a visitor.
My legs and my entire body still feel weak from the previous evening after Jake and I closed down the bar. Memories of it have continued to flood my mind ever since the moment I drove away and saw him watching from behind.
I tighten the strap of my robe and start moving across the living room toward the door when the buzzer sounds a second time.
Lifting up on my toes, I peek through the peephole and feel my heart begin to race. I’m pleasantly surprised to find Jake standing on the other side. He’d made promises of getting together again but I hadn’t allowed myself to believe it would be this soon. I assumed it was his way of escaping without awkwardness.
Now here he was.
I try not to appear too eager as I slowly unlatch the locks and pull the door open, smiling when he steps forward, pushing it open further.
Did I mention that Jake Gunner is impatient and has absolutely no problem taking exactly what he wants when he wants it? He proved that last night, over and over, and even before that.
I’m suddenly pressed up against the wall just inside my door and the robe I had tied securely around me is now parted, exposing my naked body.
“Hi,” he offers, looking down at me hungrily.
“Hi,” I say in return, my cheeks aching from the unbelievably large grin that is now covering my lips.
There is something undeniably sexy about his confidence.
“You feel like hanging out all day, hiding from everyone else? Just you and I locked away inside your place, ignoring everyone else even exists.”
I have a feeling he already knows I won’t say no. I think my attraction for him is pretty evident. It doesn’t matter how I attempt to hide it or pretend he doesn’t get to me, my body reacts instantly whenever he's near.
I had to say I was a little thrown by his interest in me though. He didn’t seem like the kind of guy who would be spending much of his time with only one woman. But with me he seems different, not that cocky arrogant man behind the bar that he shows everyone else.
“That’s workable,” I say as he presses his body closer to mine and parts my legs with his thigh. It doesn’t go unnoticed that he shifts his leg against me in a teasing manner.
“Completely workable,” I confess as I place my hands beneath the hem of his shirt and begin trailing them upward over his toned abs.
There is nothing soft about Jake.
“What are you waiting for?”
I pause, my hands resting against his abs as I look up at him, slightly confused by his question.
“Do you want me, Blair?” he asks, and I swallow past the lump in my throat. Was he joking?
“Yes,” I say in return.
“Then take what you want.” He steps back and lifts his shirt over his head before he drops it to the floor by his feet.
I stand frozen with my back still pressed firmly against the wall as I watch this sexy man undress in front of me. When he is gloriously naked only a few feet away I am finally able to gather enough strength to move toward him and take what he offers.
He doesn’t touch me at first but instead allows me to explore him. I take the opportunity to roam over his chest and arms appreciatively with the palms of my hands. Each dip of his many ridges and the flex of his muscles beneath my hands only manage to excite me more. I knew all along he’d be amazing, but to see it now, to feel him, is so much more than a simple fantasy.
Moving in closer, I press a kiss just over his heart and teasingly move lower as I kneel slowly before him.
He still refrains from touching me, his chest rising and falling quickly with each breath. With one hand sprawling out over each of his thighs, I lean in and run my tongue gently over the length of him. His legs tremble and I feel triumphant for a moment, knowing I’m making him feel unsteady. I love this feeling because I know a man like him doesn’t break often.
Lifting my hand, I wrap it securely around his cock and take him into my mouth, watching his eyes flutter shut just before his head tilts back. I swear I hear a deep growl rumble inside him, and again that feeling of victory hits me.
With each stroke of my tongue, each shift of my fisted hand over him I see him fall apart just a little more. When he begins to thrust his hips with the movements of my mouth I know I have him. Then he fists my hair and starts to guide me as he takes over. I’d never really enjoyed this part of sex; it was something I’d managed to avoid often, but this is different. Just the look on his face as he takes from me what he needs makes excitement ignite inside of me like I’ve never felt before.
When he pulls back quickly and his hardness falls from my mouth I see a fire in his eyes. One of deep hunger, one that maybe I should fear, only I don’t.
I’m lifted from the floor and moved toward my room before I have the chance to argue. Not like I would have.
He lowers me to the floor and I look over my shoulder to see him tearing open a condom package with his teeth. For a split second, I wonder to myself where he’d held it all this time, but that thought is quickly forgotten.
Jake grips my waist, turns me around and parts my legs with his. With just enough pressure applied to my lower back, I fall forward and place my hands on the footboard of my bed.
I’m just about ready to make a comment that his favorite position must be taking a girl from behind when I feel him slam into me, making me cry out in surprise. The position is no longer relevant because I’ll take him however I can get him, it doesn’t matter.
“Fuck,” he moans, and it almost sounds angry, like the fact that it feels so good irritates him. Jake fucks with vigorous thrusts, he isn’t slow, but he is consuming. He doesn’t give a woman a chance to right herself or collect her thoughts; he just takes what he needs. And in the process, he gives all he can, too.
With one hand on my hip and the other on my shoulder, he uses the leverage he’s gained to pull my body backward to meet his thrusts. He is so deep that at one point I wonder if I can take any more before I lose myself completely.
“That’s it,” he encourages me. “Let go,” he moans and that alone has to be the most exhilarating sound I’ve ever heard. “You’re squeezing me so tight, so damn tight.”
My body spins out of control and I sag forward, feeling myself come with such force my entire body trembles.
“Blair.” My name falls from his lips as he tenses and swells inside me.
I remain perfectly still, hunched over the end of my bed, with Jake still buried inside me. I know at this point there is no going back from this. If things get awkward, if things change, I understand that continuing to work with him will be impossible.
Chapt
er Eight
Jake
I lie awake, unsure of exactly what time it is. My legs are tangled with Blair’s beneath the sheets as she practically covers my body like a blanket. It is perfect, she is perfect.
We’ve spent the day getting lost in one another. It’s an easy task when it comes to her. She is the kind of girl who takes all the ugliness in my life and makes it feel nonexistent. Getting lost in her is one of the easiest things I’ve ever done.
For hours, I’ve allowed myself to believe what she and I are experiencing isn’t tarnished by my father and his expectations. I just want to feel like what we are doing, what we are sharing can be real. I understand that I’m setting myself up to be disappointed, but I also can’t stop my need to know, the need to experience what it feels like to fall for someone. I’ll admit, nothing has ever felt this extraordinary.
Now as I lie here, knowing I’m about to deceive her and the trust she’s given me, I feel sick. Her cell phone begins to ring across the room and by that alone I know it’s now eight in the evening.
I’ve been expecting it to ring, almost willing it not to, but knowing it has to.
I planned for it.
“Blair,” I say in a husky voice. I want it to appear as though the call has woken me. “Your phone’s ringing.”
“Mm,” she groans as she tries to bury her body even closer to mine. The thought of allowing her to do so and ignoring the call crosses my mind. But instead I nudge her side and she reluctantly sits up and begins moving from the bed toward the ringing phone.
“Hello.” I want to laugh at her obvious annoyance. “Sadie,” Blair complains, whines really, “how many times can one person lock their keys in their car?” There is a pause before she sighs. “Fine, but I’m not getting dressed and I sure as shit am not combing my hair. And when I drive by you better be prepared to catch ’cause I’m not even gonna stop as I toss your spare key out the window.”
I lie perfectly still, acting as if I’ve fallen back to sleep. I hope the plan works and she doesn’t insist on me riding along with her. I just need a little time alone inside her apartment.
The room grows silent just before I feel the bed dip at my side. Then the feeling of her lips brushes over my cheek as she presses a soft kiss there. The gesture makes me feel like an even bigger ass than I already am.
I shouldn’t have gotten involved with her, I know that. But it was almost impossible not too once I got to know her. I found myself wanting to protect her and do whatever it took to get her out of the middle of Nate’s mess. No matter how hard I’ve tried to convince my father she knows nothing, he won’t listen to me.
“I need to take Sadie her spare key,” Blair whispers near my ear and I remain still. “I’m hoping when I get back you’re still here.”
I wasn’t sure if she bought that I’d fallen back to sleep, but I had to believe she had. I doubt she’d be so openly sharing her thoughts if she believed me to be awake.
“I like being in your arms, Jake, I like how you make me feel. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt this safe.” She may as well have punched me in the balls. That would have been less painful than her words.
I wait, remaining very still until I feel the bed give at my side, an indication she is standing once again. Then I hear the sound of her bare feet tapping along the floor as she retreats toward the living room. I lie very still until I hear the sound of keys just before the door to her apartment clicks shut.
I know I have very little time, so I move fast. Ignoring the empty ache in my stomach, I start with the closet and under the bed, sifting through boxes and containers in search of anything that may lead me to Nate. With each passing second, I feel my heart beat faster with the idea of her returning to find me going through her things. I sort through drawers, careful not to make a mess in the process.
All I need is one little piece of information, anything that will give me something to take back to my father. An old envelope, a bank statement with an old address of his parents. Any relative, really, that he may have run too.
When I’ve gone through everything in her bedroom I move quickly to the living room and start doing the same thing. My hands shake as adrenaline courses through me. My stomach twists and turns with the deceitfulness of my actions.
I’ve just completed my search of a drawer in the kitchen and am in the process of carefully placing the items back inside when the front door opens. I spin around as Blair steps inside and eyes me with curiosity.
“What are you doing?” She looks past me toward the mess on the counter and all I can think is I have to act fast.
“I was looking for takeout menus.” Her brows are still scrunched up in the middle. “After the workout you’ve given me today, I feel like I need to refuel.” I offer a wag of my brows, attempting to lighten the moment and am relieved when she smiles back at me.
“I think you’re the one that gave me a workout.”
Ignoring the mess behind me, I move toward her in a desperate need to have her close. Hooking my arm around her waist I pull her to me, her chest pressing firmly to mine. Blair’s eyes search my own and that hollow feeling inside me returns. I want to tell her that very second who I am and what I’m in search of, but I’m fearful that things have already gone too far. The idea of losing her even though I know in the end I will anyway is too much. I’m living a lie, I know that, but it feels so good to let go of reality.
“What do you say we order something for dinner and then crawl back into bed after we eat?” Lifting my hand, I push the hair away from her face and cup her jaw. “I kinda like sleeping next to you.” More like fucking love it.
She has me saying and doing all sorts of shit I’ve always managed to avoid before. Having connections to anyone was something I’ve refrained from because when people were close, they only became a means to hurt me, something my father could hang over my head and use against me if he found it necessary. But I can’t stop myself. Blair has gotten beneath my skin, so fucking deep that all I can feel is her.
“Are you getting soft on me, Jake?” She smirks knowingly, and I shift my hips forward, biting at her lower lip and giving it a gentle tug.
“Whenever you’re near, I can assure you there is nothing soft about me.” I thrust my hips forward more suggestively and she gasps when she finds out I’m hard. It’s an unavoidable reaction to Blair.
“You do know we can’t hide out inside my apartment forever.” Oh, how I wish we could.
“We have until tomorrow when we both have to be back to work to remain just where we are.”
“Almost another entire day together.”
She looks up at me through her long gorgeous lashes and appears so sweet and innocent. She weakens me with that simple look, makes me feel as though I can barely breathe, and has no idea how she affects me. I think that’s what attracts me the most about Blair. She is the light in all the darkness that surrounds me.
“What will we do with all that time?”
“I can think of a few things.” I allow my hand on her waist to loosen as I wrap my other around her then cup her ass in both palms. When I lift her, she gives a little hop and immediately wraps her legs around my waist.
“But what about the food?”
“Suddenly I’m not hungry for food anymore.” I kiss her jaw and her head tilts back, opening up more for me to explore. “I think I’ll feast on you instead.”
“Yes, please,” she pants, and I smile against her neck. This is gonna come back to bite me in the ass, I just know it. But again, how can one stop doing the things they know they shouldn’t when it feels this fucking good? Being with Blair, getting lost in her world is an escape for me. She is everything I know I don’t deserve, and knowing that one day it’ll end makes me desperate to take all I can now.
It’s wrong, I know it’s wrong, but I can’t stop.
Chapter Nine
Blair
“I was beginning to wonder if I should fill out a missing person’s report.” I
open my front door to find Whitney standing on the opposite side. She has her arms crossed over her chest and a displeased look on her face. “Did you even consider that I’d worry after being unable to reach you for more than twenty-four hours?”
“Sorry,” I say with a shrug, still holding onto the door to keep it partially closed.
“Is there a reason as to why you aren’t letting me come inside?” Whitney is so unlike Sadie. She’s more the mother hen type, always telling me what she thinks, hovering in a sense, ensuring things are how they should be. “What are you hiding? Or should I ask who?”
She knows my life better than anyone—she knows my past. A father who left when I was six and a mother who checked out shortly after. I practically raised myself for two years before I was taken from my mother and placed in foster care. Whitney was the little girl next door to the home I was placed in and quickly became my best friend. She defended me when kids would pick on me about my clothes. She would shelter me when the mean girls at school would whisper behind my back. I love her so very much for all the support she’s given me, but sometimes I wish she’d loosen the reins just a little.
“Jake.” The second his name leaves my lips she scowls in disapproval.
“Your boss.” She shifts her weight and juts out her hip.
“Technically, he’s not my boss,” I say with an innocent shrug, hoping to lighten the moment. “He’s just the manager.”
Whitney shakes her head. “When are you gonna figure out that if you keep going after that type of guy you’re gonna get hurt in the end?”
Looking back over my shoulder, I verify the shower is still running. “He’s not who you think he is.” I can see the questioning look in her eyes. “I think the dark and dangerous is just a show for the job.”
