by SJ McCoy
Xx
His finger hovered over the keyboard. Was that enough? Should he just tell her to call anytime she wanted? He shook his head. He wanted to call her right now, but he still had things to do, and when they did finally get to talk, he wanted to be able to give her his undivided attention. He hit send with a smile. “And so it begins,” he muttered.
Chapter Five
Charlotte wanted to hide when she heard the doorbell ring. She knew it was her parents. She’d just spotted their car pulling up in the little car park outside. She didn’t want to talk to them. She rarely did, but today of all days she really didn’t want to talk to them. Her relationship with them had been strained, to say the least, since she and Ben had figured out what they’d done. When she’d come home from Vegas, she’d confronted them. Her mum had admitted straight away that yes, she’d sent a letter to Ben saying Charlotte never wanted to see him again, and that no, she’d never posted the letter that Charlotte had written, pouring her heart out to Ben and asking if they could still have a future. Both had acted as though she was making a big deal over nothing. They just didn’t care. She took a deep, calming breath. She needed to believe that they just didn’t understand what they’d done. How important Ben was to her. They didn’t understand the damage they’d done—the way they’d changed the course of her life!
The knock came again, louder this time.
“Charlie! Open up. We know you’re home.”
She went to let them in, trying to think up some excuse as to why she had to go out very soon, and they couldn’t stay.
“I can’t believe you’ve really done it,” said her dad as he came in and took a seat on the sofa.
“I didn’t think you’d actually go through with it,” called her mum on her way to the kitchen. “Do you want tea or coffee?”
“I’ll have tea,” answered her dad.
Charlotte stared at him. Why did they think this was okay? They came waltzing in here spouting their opinions. They must have talked to Alastair. Her mum was going through her cupboards; they had no regard for her whatsoever.
“Charlie?” called her mum.
“What?”
“What do you think, silly? Tea or coffee?”
“Nothing. I’m fine, thank you. And you’ll have to be quick about it. I’m going out soon.”
Her dad turned to look at her. “And where are you off to? Don’t you think it’s a bit soon to start dating? Your divorce only came through yesterday.”
Charlotte gave him a sour look. “I’m not going on a date. Not that it’s any of your business.”
“Don’t be like that, Charlie, love,” said her mum. “We talked to Alastair. We thought you might want some company. I still can’t believe you went through with it.” She came out of the kitchen and put a hand on Charlotte’s shoulder. “I know you got all mixed up when you saw that Ben again, but Alastair understands you just went through a funny phase. He’d take you back again, you know.”
Charlotte sucked in another deep breath to calm herself. She wasn’t going to lose it. Much as she’d love to tell them what she really thought of them and throw them out, she wasn’t going to. She was going to stay calm. “I don’t want to get back with him—”
“Then you’re a fool,” her dad cut in. “He’s a great guy, and he’s loaded. He puts up with your crap. You’re not going to find better.”
Charlotte glared at him. “As I was saying, I don’t want to get back with him—”
“So, what are you going to do?” asked her mum. “Your new job is nowhere near as good as what you were doing working for Alastair. And this place …” She curled her lip as she looked around the flat. “It’s hardly what you’re used to, is it? You’re going to have to make a fresh start, aren’t you?”
Charlotte nodded. She really needed to bite her tongue. Part of her wanted to tell them all about the fresh start she was hoping to make, but she knew it would only lead to arguments and she didn’t want to deal with that. She was planning to take a leaf out of their book. She was going to head back to Summer Lake, and she’d tell them where she was when she got there. Normal people didn’t do things like that. Normal people had the decency to explain their choices and actions before they left. But her family wasn’t normal. There’d been so many times in her life when she’d gotten a phone call from them telling her they were in the Caribbean or somewhere. Even times when she’d seen them the day before they left and they hadn’t mentioned a word. Hell, they’d done it right from when she was in school. She remembered being woken by her aunt telling her to get ready for school, her parents would be back in a couple of weeks—and they hadn’t even mentioned it when they’d put her to bed the night before.
“I’m in the process of figuring out what I’m going to do.” That wasn’t a lie. “And I’m afraid you really can’t stay long. I have things to sort out this afternoon.” Just the most important thing of all—her conversation with Ben.
Her mum brought two cups out with a smile. “Okay. We’ll just have a quick cuppa then. We only wanted to make sure you’re okay. We thought the reality of getting divorced might hit you hard. It’s one thing to talk about it; it’s another thing now you’ve got those papers in your hands.”
Charlotte nodded. That was true. No matter how much she’d wanted her marriage to be over, she still felt sad. “Thanks.”
~
The morning couldn’t go fast enough for Ben. It seemed to be dragging on and on. He’d seen the gang for breakfast, but he hadn’t been able to sit still with them. He didn’t want to tell them about Charlotte’s email. He’d rather tell them after he’d talked to her this afternoon. Hopefully then he’d be able to tell them that she was coming back. Missy seemed to have an idea something was up. He should have known she’d see straight through him—she always did. He’d fobbed her off with a promise that he’d give her a call this evening and tell her what was up then. He was hoping that he might be able to go over to her and Dan’s place and share his good news with them. It’d be awesome to go back into that house knowing that Charlie was coming home.
He was sitting in the office again right now, filling in the orders he hadn’t gotten to earlier when Charlie’s email came in. He looked up at the sound of a tap on the door.
Smoke grinned at him. “Just checking on you.”
Ben grinned. “Come in a minute, and close the door, would you?”
Smoke stepped inside with raised eyebrows. “You look a lot happier than you did last night. What changed?”
Ben grinned. “I heard from Charlotte.” He hadn’t wanted to tell the others, but Smoke was different—somehow.
Smoke grinned back at him. “Great. What did she have to say?”
“That her divorce is final and she wants to know where I want to go from here.”
Smoke nodded. “And what did you say?”
“I haven’t said anything yet. She told me in an email.”
Smoke frowned.
“That’s actually a good thing. She realized that after not having heard from her for all these months, it might just be putting me on the spot to tell me on the phone that she’s free now and in the next breath expect me to know what I want to do about it. She told me in an email and asked if we can talk this afternoon.”
Smoke nodded. “Smart lady.”
“She is.” Ben smiled. “And I have to say, I’m impressed. She always used to be so impetuous, she’d act in the moment and think later. She said she’s changed, and her doing things this way proves it.”
“Good. I’m glad.”
Ben raised an eyebrow. “You don’t sound it. What’s up?”
“Nothing. I’m not trying to put a damper on it or anything, I’m just a little wary on your behalf I guess. What we talked about last night?”
“Whether I really love her or I’m just in love with the memory?”
Smoke nodded. “Yeah. From what you say, she has changed.”
“Yeah, but for the better, just grown up a bit and b
ecome more considerate. That’s no bad thing.”
“Hell, no. I’m not saying it is. Ignore me, okay? Laura says I can be like an old woman worrying sometimes.”
Ben smiled. “Yeah, but it’s only because you care.”
Smoke laughed. “It is. Just don’t tell anyone, okay?”
Ben smiled. “Your secret’s safe with me.”
They both turned at the sound of a knock on the door.
“Come in,” called Ben.
The door opened and Angel stood there. Ben’s heart sank. He’d been hoping he wouldn’t run into her today.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was interrupting.”
“You’re not,” said Ben.
Smoke gave him a puzzled look. “I was just leaving.”
Damn. Ben was counting on him to stick around. “Hang on, we still have to figure out what we’re doing about ….” Damn. He couldn’t think of anything.
Smoke smiled at him through pursed lips. “Oh, yeah. It’s a good thing you reminded me.”
He smiled at Angel. “You can have him for two minutes, but then I need him back.”
Angel nodded at him uncertainly.
Ben waited, wondering what was coming.
Angel smiled at Smoke. “Would you mind giving me two minutes in private?”
Smoke looked at Ben who nodded.
“Sorry,” she said, once Smoke had closed the door behind him. “I shouldn’t interrupt you like this, but I’ve spent an hour working up the courage to come and see you. If I don’t say my piece now, I never will.”
“Okay.”
“I want to apologize again for last night.”
“I thought we were going to forget about it?”
“I can’t. And I don’t think you can either.”
Ben shook his head sadly. “I ….”
“I need to tell you,” she interrupted him. “This morning I thought about handing in my resignation.”
“There’s no need for that!”
She nodded. “I’m glad you think so; that’s what I decided, too. You see, I think, given time, you might admit that you feel something for me, too. I’m not going to be weird or anything. I’m just trying to be honest with you, Ben. I think you feel something for me, but you’re not ready to let go of your past yet. I think we’d make a great team. I accept that you don’t see me that way—not at the moment—but maybe you will.” She smiled hopefully.
Coming from any other woman, that would freak him out, but Angel was nothing if not honest.
“So, what do you think? Can we get back to business with the understanding—which after today will remain unspoken—that I’m hoping someday you’ll see me as something more than a colleague?”
Ben sighed. “You said I’m not ready to let go of my past.”
She nodded.
“You’re right. I’m not. Because Charlotte’s my past and she’s going to be my future.”
“I understand.”
She thought she understood. Ben could see what she was thinking—that he was still just clinging to memories and hope. He tried to talk gently; for some reason it was important to him not to hurt her. “No, you don’t understand. I heard from her this morning. She’s coming back.”
“Oh.”
Ben nodded. “I’m sorry.”
“Oh, don’t be! I feel so stupid. I’m sorry, Ben. And I’m happy for you. I really am.”
“Thanks.”
“I should go.” She turned around and scrabbled with the door handle before pulling it open and bolting past Smoke who was waiting outside.
“What the…” Smoke asked as he came back inside the office.
Ben shook his head sadly. “Angel came to tell me she was happy to wait for me while I figure out that I like her.”
“Ah.”
“Yeah. I told her that Charlotte’s coming back.”
Smoke shook his head.
“What?”
“I don’t know. It’s almost as though Charlotte somehow knows.”
“Knows what?”
“That she needs to get her shit together and fast. She’s left you dangling all these years, and now—the first time there’s a woman you’re interested in, she’s finally going to deign to come back.”
Ben frowned. “That’s sounds as though you don’t like Charlie.”
Smoke shrugged. “It’s not that. I don’t know her to dislike her. I guess I’m still just wary of women and how scheming they can be.”
“Charlotte’s not like that.”
“No, I’m sure. She sure has a great sense of timing though.”
“Her timing sucks if you ask me. I wish she’d come back years ago.”
“Yeah, and I hate to mention it, but you haven’t denied what I said about there being a woman you’re interested in.”
“No.” Ben sighed. “I haven’t let my mind go anywhere near that. I can’t afford to. I love Charlie. That’s all I need to know. Angel is a good person, a good friend, a good-looking woman. We get along well, we work well together, that’s all.”
“Apart from you like it when you get to hold her, like you did last night?”
“No! I mean yes. I mean. I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. It was a one off. An accident. I didn’t mean to hold her, she just …”
He met Smoke’s gaze.
Smoke shrugged. “Don’t mind me. I’m just playing devil’s advocate here.”
“Yeah, thanks. But I don’t want to even think about it. I get to talk to Charlie this afternoon. That’s all I want to think about.”
“Okay. Well, I’ll leave you to it. Let me know how it goes?”
“Thanks. I will.”
When he was done in the office, Ben went to check on the restaurant. He groaned inwardly when he saw Emma sitting out on the deck with Jack’s mom, Chris. He could hardly pretend not to see her. She was grinning and waving at him.
“Hey,” he said when he reached the table. “We missed you at breakfast this morning.”
Emma folded her hands on top of her baby bump. “There was no way I was going to get down here that early. It takes me all my time to get out of bed these days.”
Chris smiled. “Make the most of it. In a few weeks you’ll be longing for the days when you could stay in bed and not have to get up and see to the baby.”
Emma nodded. “So everyone keeps telling me, but I’ll still be glad not to be the size of a bus anymore.” She narrowed her eyes at Ben. “And I want to get the christening organized soon.”
Ben shook his head at her.
“Well?”
“I’ll tell you what, how about I give you a call this evening and let you know.”
Her eyes widened. “Really?”
Ben couldn’t help grinning. “Yeah, really, but that’s all I’m saying for now.” He smiled at Chris. “And how are you?”
She nodded. “Doing wonderfully, thank you. I thought this was supposed to be a sleepy little town, but my life’s been busier than ever since I moved here.”
“Good for you.”
Emma chuckled. “A little too good for you, according to Jack.”
Chris laughed. “He’s just too protective and too nosey. It’s none of his business what I get up to.”
Ben smiled. Chris had been in the restaurant quite a lot lately with one of the pilots in training from Smoke’s flight school.
“It’s nothing serious.” Chris waggled her eyebrows. “I’m just having a little fun for the first time in way too many years.”
“I think it’s great,” said Emma. “Just don’t tell Jack I said that.”
Ben’s phone rang in his pocket and his heart started to hammer. He checked his watch. One minute past twelve. He fished his phone out and checked the display. It was her.
He hit answer and brought it up to his ear. “Charlie!”
Emma’s hands flew up to cover her mouth as she stared at him wide-eyed. He waved a hand at her and turned to go back to the office. How the hell had the time gotten away from
him so quickly?
“Hi, Ben.”
“Hi yourself.” This was crazy. He was tongue-tied. He made it back to the office and closed the door behind him and sat down. “How are you?” He got up again and locked the door. He did not want to be disturbed; this might be the most important phone call of his life.
“All the better for hearing your voice. I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you, too. So much.”
“I feel as though I’ve missed you my whole life, but these last few months have been even harder.”
“I know. It’s been like having hope dangled in front of me and then having to wait in silence.”
“I wanted to talk to you. Every day I wanted to talk to you.”
“Me too. Saying that we shouldn’t talk felt like such a stupid move.”
“It did.” She let out a little laugh. “But it was the right thing to do.”
Ben didn’t want to know what she meant by that. It hit him again that she’d had a husband to deal with—another man’s heart to break. “How is he?”
“He’s good. I told you, we had lunch yesterday, to celebrate. It was weird and sad, but good. He’s better off without me.”
“And you?”
“You know the answer to that. I’m better off without him. I should never have been with him. I’ve only ever loved you.”
Ben nodded. The thought of her with someone else still felt like a gut punch.
“What about you?”
“What about me?”
“I never even asked you in Vegas. Was there someone else. Is there?”
Ben sucked in a deep breath. “I’ve dated. Of course I have. Not much though.”
“And is there anyone who’s not going to be happy about me coming back?”
Ben closed his eyes. He didn’t want to lie to her. But Angel not being happy about it didn’t matter. Not when he himself was ecstatic.
“Your silence makes me think there is.”
“Not like you might think. There’s a girl who works for me. She thought she might have a chance.”
“I see.”
“No, you don’t see.” This wasn’t going how he’d planned. “I’m not interested in her.”
“Good. But if you are, you should go for it. I’ve been thinking a lot about it, Ben. About how this is going to work. On the one hand, you’re my soul mate. We’ve known each other forever. On the other, if we’re realistic about it—and I’m trying to be—we don’t even know each other anymore. I don’t want us to ruin what we might have by going into it with unrealistic expectations.”
