Hated Secret Admirer

by Vanessa Sueroz

  "I didn't dream it. It was all so real. It's not possible it was a dream," I complained.

  "But I think it was. Want me to prove it?" He asked me, unsure.

  "If you can," I answered, sure of myself.

  I didn't dream any of this. It's not possible, is it? Honestly, I couldn't have lived all that in my head. That means that everything I lived since the History class two weeks ago never happened – we didn't go to Campos de Jordão during the Winter's festival, we didn't make a snowman, Andressa is not with Fernando, Bruno isn't smoking, André never asked me out, the roses never happened, oh my God! I never kissed Lucas!

  "Look," he said, handing me a calendar. "What day do you think it is?" He asked me.

  Obviously I showed him the June 14, Saturday box, but according to Lucas face I was dead wrong.

  "Paula, it's March 30, Friday," he answered me, pointing to the day in the calendar marked with an X.

  "You've got to be kidding. I really dreamed all that?" I asked, distraught.

  It can't be true. Am going to have to go through it all over again? I'll have to win Lucas back again? That's totally unfair!

  "No!" I said, very annoyed.

  "I'm sorry to tell you, but you dreamed it all, Paulie," he said, seeming to enjoy my agony.

  "You mean nothing happened?" I asked, upset.

  "Unfortunately, some things we can fix. If you want I can send you roses," he joked.

  "Funny man! I don't want roses. I never liked them," I complained, upset.

  "Look on the bright side, your annoying friend Bruno isn't really smoking. At least as far as I know," he answered, shrugging.

  "You know...let's go have lunch. After that disappointment, there's not much I can do," I said, morosely.

  "Let's," he said at last, looking thoughtful.

  I still can't believe how a dream could be so real. How does someone wake up and doesn't even know they were dreaming? I could still feel everything, I could still feel his taste in my mouth.

  The day dragged on, the hours lasting forever and I was living a horrible déjà-vu. Like Andressa and Fernando having gotten together at the end of my dream, now it's weird seeing them with all that shyness and apart.

  I was able to see Bruno at a table on the other side of the dining hall, together with those annoying, irritating friends of his. There was no trace of cigarettes or anything else illegal, but how could I know if I was far away? No one would bring a cigarette to smoke in the middle of dinner since any kind of drug consumption is forbidden. I think I don't even had to say it. What school would allow that?

  But the person I couldn’t stop looking at sadly was my best friend. Lucas was like I remembered, however, he needed a shave, different from when we kissed, actually, than when I dreamed we kissed, but I don't care, after all, it could've been real. Just that kiss and I would've been satisfied.

  Good thing Vitor is always Vitor. He didn't change in the dream, let alone in real life, but I still couldn't get over the fact that I'd dreamed of the whole school, but not Annie. What an awful friend I am. I can't believe I thought of everyone and left my little friend Ana out of the adventure, my almost adventure, my episode, whatever.

  The best part of it all is that next day would be Saturday and I knew we'd go to the Winter's festival, and I'd finally be able to make my snowman, or at least I hope so. I'd even take my camera to take photos to show my mom later.

  After that horrible day, that I know can confirm it was the worst day of my life, I left a parallel universe (that existed only in my head) and came back to the real world, where everything was still up in the air.

  I slept and unfortunately didn't dream. I wanted to continue the dream I had in the classroom. Is it possible to be continue a dream where it stopped?

  Next morning I groused on the bed, hoping the day was done, but unfortunately Annie got me out of bed at ten in the morning. I knew it was too soon to leave. I could bet Vitor was still asleep, so I decided to walk around the school.

  It was a big surprise when I found Bruno sitting at the stairs in front of the school.

  "What are you doing here alone?" I asked, sitting next to him.

  "I was just watching time go by. I don't have the money to go with the guys to Campos today. I think I'll stick around and sleep for a while."

  "Sleep on a Saturday? We use Sundays to be lazy," I joked.

  "I think it's best to be lazy the whole weekend," he joked back.

  "Can I ask you a personal question?" I asked, unsure.

  We've always been friends, but since he started hanging out with those boys we drifted apart, because I don't like his friends and he doesn't like mine, and I have to confess that Lucas, Vitor, and Fernando hate Bruno, just don't ask me why, because I have no idea.

  "Of course," he answered me with a half-smile.

  "After that day I saw you lighting a cigarette...did it happen again?" I asked, hoping Lucas was telling the truth.

  "It hasn't been that long, what? The day before yesterday?" Bruno asked, laughing. "The guys pressured me to do it, but it was exactly what I wanted, I tried it, hated it, and never want to do it again," he answered, shrugging.

  "Promise me you won't try another drug again? Drugs we can't try not even once. Unlike what a lot people say, just trying can make you addicted. And before you say you can stop, you can't do it alone and won't accept help to crawl out of the hole, because you won't even admit you're in one," I said, thoughtful.

  "I know all that. I really didn't mean to. I just wanted to know how it was, but I've regretted it already. My dad, as you know, smokes like a chimney, and I always thought that was wrong, but I wanted to know why he liked it so much, maybe I'd understand him better."

  "You're here. We were looking for you," I heard Fernando’s voice behind me. "Bruno," he greeted him.

  "Fernando," Bruno answered, frowning in answer.

  "Everyone is after you, Paulie. Should we go for breakfast?" He asked me.

  "Let's. I was thinking you weren't getting up anytime soon," I said, laughing and getting up. "We'll talk more later, Bruno," I said, smiling at my friend.

  "See you. You know where to find me," he answered me with a slight smile.

  "You got it!" I answered, smiling back, even though we both know that I won't look for him. "Is Vitor awake?" I asked Fernando while we walked to the dining hall.

  "To tell you the truth we woke him up and he's in a crappy mood," he answered, shrugging.

  "When is he not in a crappy mood?" I joked.

  "You've got a point," he answered, laughing.

  When we were almost at the hall, I saw André coming in from the opposite side of the hallway. I was unsure if I should go talk with him, after all, he was not into me, none of the was real. We never had a date, and I sincerely hope we never will.

  "Good morning, Paula. Good morning, Fernando," he greeted us when he went by.

  "Good morning," Fernando answered, smile friendly.

  "Good morning, André," I greeted.

  It was so weird seeing him distant...not that I was complaining.

  I watched him join his friends, and to my shock, he greeted a blonde girl with a kiss on the mouth. I think I missed something while I've been sleeping in the corners.

  I was happy to know that part of the dream, along with what happened with Bruno, was simply a dream, that is, a nightmare inside a beautiful and long dream.

  "Did you know André had a girlfriend?" I asked when I found my friends.

  "I knew he was hooking up with someone in his class, but I'd never seen them," Andressa said after watching André talking animatedly with the blonde girl.

  "You don't like it?" Annie asked.

  "I'm happy for him," I answered, smiling.

  "I don't know why you're so happy about it. He's too ugly for her," Vitor said, frowning.

  "You're just saying that because you struck out with her last week," Fernando said nastily.

  "I'm much prettier than him. Too bad she has
bad taste," he complained.

  Apparently he just woke up, or better, someone just woke him up.

  "And where's Lucas?" I asked after a few minutes, finally noticing that he wasn't there.

  "For someone who's so totally in love, she takes her sweet time to notice he's missing," Vitor said, laughing.

  "I'm not totally in love," I answered, annoyed. "He's in a really crap mood," I said to Andressa who was sitting next to me.

  "She's not totally in love. She's just fallen for him," Andressa said, laughing.

  "As you have for the shy guy next to you," I said, laughing.

  How mean I am.

  "And where's Lucas anyway?" I asked again.

  "He said he had to do some things and was coming later," Fernando answered, cheeks still red from my last comment.

  I stared at the door for most of breakfast, until he finally arrived wearing jeans, a white polo shirt with one button opened, and combed hair. Is it me or is he too dressed up for a Saturday breakfast?

  Do I have to say he looks radiant? And what's up with that smile, people? I only realized there was something different when came close enough, and I have to add that I also love the perfume.

  "Good morning," he greeted everyone before sitting next to me. "Good morning, angel," he greeted me with a typical kiss on the cheek. "I brought you a gift," he told me before putting a red rose on top of the table.

  A rose? A red rose? He's joking, right? Why would he give me a rose? Wasn't him himself that told me he'd never give me a rose because he knows I don't like them?

  "A rose?" I asked, not understanding.

  "I like the ending of your dream. I know you don't like roses, but I'm superstitious, and maybe it won't work with a different flower. There's just one small detail. I didn't like being called hated admirer, so I'm coming clean about the roses coming from me from the start." Is he really saying what I think he's saying?

  "You'd never be a hated secret admirer, Lucas," I answered, laughing.

  "Specially because I'm not secret, I rather tell you in person that I'm crazy about you and I think you might feel the same way."

  "I wouldn't be so sure," I lied, smiling lightly.

  "Then I'll have to send you roses until you are," he said, pouting.

  "I think I'm starting to like roses," I joked, laughing.

  "And the fact that I'm you not-secret admirer," he joked, before he glued his lips to mine.

  "Eww! I can’t see this kind of things this early," Vitor complained next to us.

  You know what? I don't care. I simply pulled him closer and kept kissing him, and I have to admit the taste of his mouth in person was way better than in my dreams.

  I think that roses are going to start being my favorite flowers.

  Epilogue

  I was still sitting in front of my computer writing down the end of my adventure, or must I say my almost adventure? After all, I didn't live most of the things I wrote here because it was all a dream, but I can guarantee that every moment was unique and I'll remember it as a weird day in my life.

  "Paulie," I heard someone calling me and I had to take my eyes from the computer to see Annie standing at the door.

  "I'm coming!" I said, knowing they were in a hurry, but I had to finished this before I left.

  "We're late," she said, crossing her arms in her best we're-in-a-hurry pose, even tapping her foot.

  "I'm coming. Let me just finish this. Five more minutes," I asked, focusing on the computer again.

  Ever since I said that I was going to write a book about the worst day of my life, now nicknamed W-day, for wonderful, I've been glued to the computer trying to finish writing my memories.

  "Baby, we're going to be late," this time it was Lucas, my boyfriend and best friend.

  I tried not to look at him or I'd lose focus and never finish, but I think that knowing that, he came closer and I soon felt his warm, soft lips lightly touching my neck with an irresistible, warm kiss, or almost irresistible.

  "That's not fair! Five more minutes," I asked again, trying uselessly to get away from him.

  "You hate to be late," he said.

  "But I just want to finish this up, I'm almost at the end," I answered.

  "I'll help you. What do you still have to write?" He asked me, pulling a chair next to me.

  "I'm writing how we finally started dating," I explained.

  "So put in a happily ever after and you're done," he said, shrugging. "After all, we're happy, at least I am, despite the fact that I'm annoyed because we're late."

  "I'm happy and we're already late. Five more minutes won't make any difference," I answered, ignoring the happily ever after. No one ends a romance like that, right?

  Finally he gave up and went back to the living room to wait for me to finish our book and our story.

  How could I finish my book without knowing how my life would be like from now on? This book finishing business is hard.

  "Lady Sith, we're way late," I heard Vitor complaining.

  "This way I'll never finish this," I complained, not paying him any attention.

  I'm losing valuable time arguing with them while I could be finishing writing.

  "Are you really not going to finish that later? You know I don't like being late," I heard his voice coming nearer. What is he up to?

  I didn't answer and kept writing, I better focus, at least that was the idea. That's when I felt my body becoming lighter and the computer slipping farther away; I looked down and realized I wasn't the one doing that, but Vitor, who was dragging me, chair and all, out of the room.

  After that demonstration of caring from Vitor, I ran into the room to turn off the computer. After all, we were late for bowling. This time I'm in Lucas's team and I think I'll finally beat Vitor.

  When I come back I'll finish writing and delighting my readers.

  Know more about the author

  Vanessa Sueroz was born in São Paulo, got a degree in computer Sciences and works as a system analyst in São Paulo. She started writing when she was 8 years old and started publishing fan fiction in 2006, finally getting enough readers to publish her first book in 2011.

  Blog – Facebook – Twitter

  Your Review and Word-of-Mouth Recommendations Will Make a Difference

  Reviews and word-of-mouth recommendations are crucial for any author to succeed. If you enjoyed this book, please leave a review, even if it is only a line or two, and tell your friends about it. It will help the author bring you new books and allow others to also enjoy the book.

  Your support is greatly appreciated!

  Are You Looking For Other Great Reads?

  Your Books, Your Language

  Babelcube Books helps readers find great reads. It plays matchmaker, bringing you and your next book together.

  Our collection is powered by books produced at Babelcube, a marketplace that brings independent book authors and translators together and distributes their books in multiple languages globally. The books you will find have been translated so that you can discover terrific reads in your language.

  We are proud to bring you the world’s books.

  If you want to learn more about our books, browse our catalog and join our newsletter to learn about our latest releases, visit us at our website:

  www.babelcubebooks.com