SACRED GRIP

by Allen, J. C

  I knew that was a fool’s dream.

  The only dreams I was getting these days were ones in which I saw Eve dying, Roost dying, or Falcon succeeding. I might have been able to suppress my subconscious during my waking hours, but sleep had a cruel way of reminding me of my own insecurities and fears.

  I guess that was a part of the reason why I stayed up and went on these night missions.

  The doors opened and I glanced up, seeing that Roost was sitting in the lobby. I stepped over, wondering how long he’d been waiting there for me. Roost, who had been staring at his smartphone, glanced up as I closed the distance between us. The look of impatience and concern had me a bit nervous, and we hadn’t even left the lobby of my complex.

  “What’s up? Anything important on that phone of yours?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at the look of concern on his face.

  “Nothin,’” Roost said as he sighed, running his hand over the back of his neck. “That’s what concerns me.”

  “Isn’t nothing usually a good thing?” I asked. “I was just thinking if we didn’t run into anything, at least our men would be safe.”

  “Not when it has anythin’ to do with Falcon,” Roost said. “We ain’t assumin’ nothin’, Derek. If we were supposed to get a clue and instead we got nothin’, that’s a red flag over the entire city.”

  It was true. I kicked myself for wishing for nothing to happen. Nothing happening was really just a translation of “worst things are going to happen, they’re just planning for them right now.”

  “Well, why don’t we go see if we can find something at the last place?” I asked.

  “Well, truth be told, we already got the boys over there and they ain’t findin’ nothin’ yet. But suppose it ain’t gonna hurt. Maybe we can.”

  “Then let’s roll,” I said, motioning for him to follow me out the front doors.

  I glanced over, seeing his Harley Fat Boy parked beside mine. After he had used the bike to literally break through the gates of the old Black Falcons’s hideout, it had been in dire need of repair—of “fresh lovin,’”as he had put it—and he’d since gone and worked some upgrades as well as some new additions to the bike.

  I had to admit, though it wasn’t the sort of motorcycle I’d traditionally ride, she’d come out of the proverbial operation as a truly breathtaking and beautiful piece of machinery. I moved onto my own bike, taking a moment to consider it from one tire to the other, and decided that, after all of this was over and done with, I would have to invest a bit of “fresh lovin’” to my own chopper, as well. After all, the president had to have the nicest bike in the entire motorcycle club, right?

  “Getting’ jealous of my beauty?” Roost asked with a laugh.

  Shit. I felt my cheeks burn at that and forced myself to look away. There were a few cardinal rules I tried to follow.

  Don’t look at another man when using a urinal.

  Don’t ask another man for advice on matters you wouldn’t feel comfortable asking your father.

  And don’t ever let yourself be caught eyeballing another man’s wheels.

  It was almost better to be caught eying their girlfriend or wife before letting on that you coveted their ride. And given that Roost was never going to have a girlfriend more romantic than Tara, let’s just say it was truly the most embarrassing thing I could have done in that moment.

  “Let’s go,” I said, giving him a non-answer as I busied myself on making a totally unnecessary show out of jump-starting my chopper and revving its engine, pretending to be suddenly wrapped up in the purr of the engine.

  Roost, likely seeing right through the phony show, just laughed at me, his laugh audible even over the roar of his bike. At least I gave him one last laugh before we head into hell. Might as well relish such moments—not sure how many more of these we’re gonna have.

  Finally, Roost started his own bike, and I more listened than actually watched as his Harley roared to life.

  “Let’s do it!” I yelled.

  Embarrassed as I was at that little masculine blunder, I couldn’t help feeling excitement at getting to ride with Roost again. It really had been too long.

  “Ya ready ta go?” Roost asked, raising an eyebrow.

  “Yeah, I didn’t say let’s go cuz I was quoting a movie!” I said, giving him the thumbs up. “You know where we’re headed, right?”

  “Yup! The others are already there, waitin’ on us,” Roost said.

  “They’re being safe, right?”

  “Yeah, it’s fine, Derek,” Roost said, shrugging a shoulder. “They are Marines, after all. All respect, but I’d be more concerned with yer scrawny ass bein’ on yer own than I would be with them boys out there.”

  “Fair enough,” I said. “OK, for real this time. Let’s do it!”

  With that, we both shot off onto the main road, heading towards the final spot where the last of the bodies had been found. It had only been three days in total, but time had gone so slowly. The danger with time slowing down is it made you more aware of the effect everything you were doing had on you—and this was doing a big number on us.

  No matter how normal Eve and I were trying to act during the day, these nightly activities had been affecting both of us. I took a deep breath, working to get lost in the ride, get lost in the only time I had to myself. I no longer had visions of Maggie when we came to stops, making my motorcycle rides much more peaceful and tranquil for me.

  I could never say I had meditated a day in my life, but the way the roads seemed to give me a clear shot forward, a blank mind, and unwavering focus basically felt like meditation to me. It was the best thing that I had.

  And then we arrived.As we reached the location, another construction site, I glanced around, seeing how empty it looked. Suffice to say, after Roost’s comments in the lobby of my complex, I was a bit on edge.

  “You think we might not find anything this time?” I asked, not bothering to hide how hopeful my voice had gotten.

  “We will have ta see,” Roost said, sliding off his bike and heading towards the others. “If these boys ain’t find somethin’, probably not. But ain’t ever gonna be sure until we see it all.”

  I watched as Roost walked over to the usual trio of Bones, AK, and Rucker, who were all standing by their own bikes. I moved off my own bike, heading towards the group and glanced around. I thought of giving a quick hello and thanking them for rescuing me, but such words were probably better reserved for when we were back at the shop than out here in the open.

  “Have you guys looked around at all?” I asked.

  “Yes,” Bones said.

  “So, ya guys find anythin’?” Roost asked, moving his hands to his hips.

  “No, sir,” Erik said, sighing.

  “Yeah, we looked everywhere too,” Rucker said, glancing around as he did. “Place is a ghost town. There’s nothing.”

  Well, on the one hand, mission accomplished in avoiding danger.

  But, I realized, this only meant we had made exactly zero progress in the quest to figure out what the Black Falcons were up to and our attempts to kill them.

  I guess it didn’t pay to be safe.

  “Well, what are your thoughts, Roost?” I asked, wondering if it would be worth it to even check again. “I figure we might—”

  Roost’s phone began to buzz in his pocket.

  “Shit, Mercury! You didn’t silence that before coming?” I said,

  “Damn thing’s vibratin,’ ain’t it?” he tried to defend. “Sorry, piece of shit.”

  “It’s fine, not like we’ve kept our voices quieter than that,” I said, realizing my momentary freakout was completely unjustified.

  He stepped away and I watched him, waiting to see just who had called. I wondered if it had anything to do with this situation, a concern that seemed more likel as his face began to grow more concerned. I glanced over at the three others, who had been watching with their own looks of concern. Now seemed a good chance to thank them.

  “I appre
ciate what you three did for me last night,” I said. “AK, Rucker, I’m sure you played as big a role in rescuing me as Bones did.”

  “Not a problem, sir,” AK said.

  “Yes, sir,” Rucker said.

  “You are OK now,” Bones said, more an observation than a question.

  “I think that’s fair to say,” I said, testing my arm for the hell of it. It was still sore and a little bit pain, but I wasn’t limited in mobility or in strength in any way that I could tell. “Is it common for men to—”

  “Yes,” Bones said.

  “Mission comes first,” Rucker said. “If we can keep fighting, we fight. I’ve seen men get their appendages blown off, sometimes even limbs, and they keep fighting.”

  “Damn,” I said, feeling like a sudden pussy in comparison. “Well, thanks all the same.”

  I turned back, glancing over as Roost stepped over to me. I raised an eyebrow, seeing that his face was still twisted in concern as he made his way back over.

  “What happened?” I asked, my own concern beginning to grow.

  “We gotta get back to the shop,” he said, already turning towards his bike. “I’ll tell ya when we get there.”

  “Shit, what?”

  But before Roost could respond to me, he was already gunning his bike and heading off.

  “You heard him!” I said. “Let’s roll!”

  We made our way to the shop in record time. I could feel the concern continuing to grow. I hated how quiet Roost was about the situation, how he had not responded to my request for further clarification. I knew whatever he had found out was not good.

  I wanted to get back to Eve, wanted all this to be over, and somehow, I felt this was only the beginning. That the games were only ending now and the real war was about to start.

  Fuck…

  You knew Falcon would pull a mindfuck like this. This is nothing new, Derek. You gotta stay with it and keep your head together. Whatever Roost found, he didn’t just pull us away for nothing.

  I parked my bike beside Roost as he led me into the office. I glanced around, seeing how empty the shop was with how late it was, and wondered why he had us come here. He stepped over to the computer at the desk and turned it on. I watched, my nerves only continuing to grow and glanced over as the printer began to sputter to life, spitting out several pages.

  “What’s going on, Roost?” I asked as I stepped towards the desk, slamming my hands down in front of him.

  “What’s going on is we just finished yer wild goose chase,” Roost said, continuing to type as he stared at the computer screen.

  “What? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” I asked, glaring down at how nonchalant he suddenly seemed. “Am I at fault? What did—”

  “Nah, no one coulda known,” Roost said. “But it means that Eve was right, this was only a chase. And, furthermore, it doeslead nowhere.”

  Roost finally moved away from the computer to snag the papers from the printer, but he moved like a mad scientist, unable to make human contact.

  “What? What do you mean? What are you talking about?” I demanded as I watched him finish up with his typing.

  “It was a distraction, Derek,” Roost said, moving the papers in front of me.

  On the pages were photographs of different areas of the city. In the photos were Falcon standing over a crew, supervising some kind of construction. On the last page, there were four smaller photos of the finished buildings with several men standing around the locations.

  I glanced back at Roost, frowning. What I was seeing… was this just not the clue?

  “So… what? They’ve just been setting up new locations?” I asked.

  “Four, from the looks of things. It seems Falcon decided to branch out a bit since we destroyed their last hideout. What better way to insure the completion of these new HQs than to send us everywhere an’ anywhere except where he didn’t want us?” Roost said, running his hand over his neck. “And that’s not the end of it, they’ve begun selling again and at a much more rapid rate than before. The city crime rate has increased in the last week.”

  “What?” I asked. “How is that even possible?”

  My mind raced in panic. Was this really happening? I glanced back at Roost, unsure of what to do now.

  We’d gotten played badly, once again. It was a theme, I noticed, that whenever we thought we had a bead on the Falcons, they turned it around on us. It was only when they had an obvious location, an obvious event, that we had them pegged, and even then, it often was more heavily fortified than we thought.

  It was clear that whatever we did, we’d have to commit an uncomfortable amount of our men and resources to the effort. Lives would be lost. Money would be wasted.

  But we had to take them out. And we had to figure out how to approach them.

  “What do we do then?” I finally asked.

  “Best I can think, we take out these place one-by-one,” Roost said, shrugging. “It’s the only thing we can do. We got a lot of numbers still thanks to our neighborhood raid, and I believe they’re still bigger than what the Black Falcons’s got.”

  “But how can we be sure this isn’t also another trap? Or another goose chase?”

  “’Cuz these photos came from Eagle,” Roost said, showing me the email.

  I stared in a bit of surprise. I hadn’t requested Eagle to go on that mission, and while I didn’t oversee everyone’s actions—that would take up just too much of my time—the higher level folks usually came to me first.

  “See, thing is, I was gettin’ a bit suspicious ‘bout all this,” Roost explained. “We went to all these places, and only place we ran into anyone was when ya got shot. But even then, Bones was tellin’ me the prints were fresh, as if we’d gotten there literally minutes after they’d taken our guys there. So it seemed to me they wanted us to discover it after the fact.”

  “And so they could escape and keep focusing on their real buildings.”

  “Bingo,” Roost said. “Thing with Falcon, ya can’t be thinkin’ of what a rational person would do. Ya gotta think outside yer box. So I had Eagle just go anywhere that ain’t in that lil’ triangle you created that one day. Said ‘no shootin’, just scoutin’.’ He seemed to take the words to heart and sent those over just now.”

  “Is he safe?”

  “Yep, I sent him home once he got these.”

  “And we confirmed he’s home?”

  “Yep.”

  I grimaced at the realization of just how unsafe things were becoming, but the longer my grimace lasted, the more dangerous I realized things were. Now, the Falcons didn’t just have one home—like a virus in a body, they’d replicated and made themselves even more present throughout the city. It wasn’t an understatement to say that they were spreading and we had to stop them before they surrounded the shop.

  “When ya see Eve, Derek, tell her to be real careful,” Roost said. “Rise in crime, these new places, and everythin’ else associated with this makes me think this is ‘bout to go from a goose chase to a goose hunt. They took their time lickin’ their wounds, but those wounds have healed or they healthy enough. You can’t be too careful outside, Derek. Don’t leave yer place without a gun, and do the same for Eve.”

  I bit my lip. Well, it was a fun three weeks while it lasted.

  “Understood,” I said. “Let me get home and advise her of such. We’ll start a plan tomorrow. They may have spread, but we know where they are now.”

  14

  Eve

  In most of my dreams, I stared at the man from the party, Tyler, or the Falcon before me as they threatened to kill Derek.

  But tonight, I saw something new.

  I was in Derek’s apartment, standing in the entrance just from his elevator. The place was littered with beer bottles, liquor handles, and spilled wine. Pizza boxes littered the place. Holes in the wall were punched. Everywhere you looked, the place had fallen apart into a kind of destruction.

  And there, standing before it all,
with a gun to his head, was Derek Knight.

  “What are you doing, Derek?” I said, trying to remain calm before him, reminding myself I could not control the gun but I could control my own reactions.

  “Whaddoes it look like I’m doinnn, Eeeeve?” he said, slurring his words as the alcohol had, once again, gotten to him. “Fuck it, I’m, I’m, I’m burnin’ it all! Hahahaha, yes, goodbye, goodbye, gooooodbyyyyeeeeee!”

  “Derek!” I said, trying not to cry. “Why did you get like this? What the hell happened to you?”

  “Oh, nothing happened to me, Eveee,” he said. “I just, I just reaaalized the truth. We can’t, we won’t, or, err, umm…”

  He paused to throw up right before me. I thought of running in to take the gun from him, but he was too far. He’d see me coming.

  “Ooooh, the taste of self-defeat is incredible! Haha, hahahaha, hahahahaha! You should try it sometime, Eve!”

  “Derek, what is going on,” I said, not bothering to hide my tears.

  “You really think I, Derek Knight, could defeat Falcon? You really thought that was possible? I am no hero. I am not your man. I am, I am a failure of a son. We tried, Eve, we tried. And we gave it our all.”

  Then he raised the gun from the ground back to his head.

  “No! No no no!” I shouted.

  Derek, temporarily, put the gun down.

  “We can still do this, Derek. You and I. We can get away.”

  “Hmmm,” he said, drunkenly mumbling and soon burping. “You know what?”

  And then, as if in some supernatural state, his face and voice turned to that of Rock’s.

  “You’re right.”

  “No!”

  The trigger was pulled.

  I saw the bullet screaming toward my head.

  I closed my eyes.

  I jolted forward, awake, out of breath, away from my dream. I looked to my right. Derek… sober Derek… alive Derek…

  He was there.

  He was fine.

  I had just had yet another nightmare.

  And the worst part was, once my mind settled, my heartbeat went back to normal, and I realized Rock was not here, he was still dead, and Derek had not puked in the living room, I realized that I was completely used to these kinds of nightmares to an almost unhealthy degree.