Road to Absolution

by Piper Davenport

  “Fuck!” Ace rasped. “It’s been two hours, we need to get her out of there.”

  “Carter, I get it. But I need you to back up so we can do our job.”

  * * *

  I don’t know how long I’d been in this room with Robert, but I was feeling stifled by the heat and the closeness of his body, and I really had to pee.

  The FBI had called into the phone in the room and all it managed to do was to make Robert even more frantic. I think he realized he wasn’t walking out of here with me, and probably knew he’d be going away for a very long time.

  “Robert, please. I could really use some water, and I’d like to talk to my son. Could we please just call them back?”

  “Shut up!” He paced the room, his eyes and hands moving wildly.

  “Please,” I begged.

  “You’re not leaving this room, Cassidy. Just shut up.”

  “What do you mean?” I whispered.

  “I’m not an idiot. I know there are agents outside waiting for us. I’m not leaving this room alive.” He silenced me with a stare. “And neither are you.”

  “No, please, don’t do this, Robert.”

  He pointed the gun at me and time stopped. I think I heard the sound of a shot, but didn’t register it. Just the excruciating burning pain that spread through my stomach. I screamed and Robert put the gun to his head and pulled the trigger. He fell into a heap on the ground and all I could think about was now Carter could save me.

  * * *

  A shot rang out, then a scream and another shot, and Ace shoved past his brother and into the conference room. “Cassidy! Somebody get the fuckin’ paramedics in here now!”

  Cassidy was slumped on a chair, blood pouring from her stomach. She had her hands over the wound, trying to keep pressure on it.

  “Baby,” he whispered, replacing her hands with his. “I’m here. I’ve got you.”

  “He… he shot himself. In the head,” she whispered, her eyes unable to focus on anything.

  “I know, baby. Look at me. I’ve got you.”

  “It hurts.”

  “I know, honey. Help’s coming.” He turned and yelled, “Where the fuck are the paramedics?”

  “Here,” a young woman said and wheeled in a gurney, a large man following. “Sir, give us some space, please.”

  Ace found himself pulled away by Jaxon, and Cassidy was lifted onto the gurney. The paramedics did whatever the fuck they did and then she was wheeled into the elevator. Ace followed, keeping hold of her hand, even though she’d passed out.

  The rest of the day moved in a fog. Ace was forced to leave Cassidy in the hallway of the hospital as they wheeled her into emergency surgery. Most of the club arrived shortly after the ambulance did, as did Jaxon. Brock and Dallas were cleaning up and processing the crime scene.

  An hour later, no one had given Ace any information and he was going crazy.

  “Let me see what I can do,” Macey Stone, Payton’s best friend, offered. She had arrived with Payton and Dani, and happened to be an emergency room nurse in Portland. He highly doubted she’d have any access here, but he was desperate. Ace nodded and she left the group.

  “Fuck,” Ace whispered, dropping his still bloody hands on his head. “I have to get Maverick.”

  “He’s fine,” Payton said. “Ashley’s got him and Lily totally entertained. She’s ordering pizza and can stay with them all night if need be. We can also take him home later if you like.”

  Tears slipped down his face. “What do I tell him if she dies?”

  “She’s not going to die,” Payton promised, wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

  Jaxon sat in the chair next to him. “I called Cassidy’s parents and Mia. Her mom will call Shannon and fill her in. They’re on their way.”

  Ace nodded.

  “I think you should get cleaned up,” Jaxon said. “Aidan’s grabbing you some clean clothes. I figured you wouldn’t want to leave.”

  “Thanks.”

  Macey returned twenty minutes later and sat where Payton had been. “Dallas’s brother called in privileges for me so I could stay updated, but I can’t give you any information without her next of kin’s permission.”

  Dallas Stone was one of Jaxon’s FBI partners, and Macey’s husband.

  “What the fuck?” Ace bellowed.

  “I just need verbal approval from her mom or dad, Ace. Okay? If we can call them, then I should be covered.”

  “I’m on it.” Jaxon pulled out his cell phone and dialed Cassidy’s mother.

  Once approval was given, Macey signed some forms, had Ace sign some forms, although he didn’t read them, and then she left him again.

  Macey became his personal liaison and he honestly didn’t know how he would have managed without her. Aidan returned with clean clothes, although, Macey had offered to grab him scrubs, but he decided to wait.

  Ace took five minutes to go to the bathroom and wash up as best he could before shoving his dirty clothes, cut and all, in a plastic bag, and returning to the waiting room.

  Macey brought out a bag with Cassidy’s belongings in it, but handed him her engagement ring. “I figured you probably wouldn’t want this getting lost.”

  He nodded and pulled off the chain around his neck, slipping the ring onto it and sliding it back around his neck. He found Cassidy’s matching chain and also slipped that around his neck.

  “Surgery’s going really well,” Macey said. “They got the bleeding under control. She’s out of the woods. I think they’re just closing up really soon and then she’ll go into the ICU for observation.”

  “But she’s okay?” he asked.

  “She’s out of the woods.”

  He faced her with a frown. “That’s not what I asked.”

  “Carter,” Jaxon warned.

  “Fuck off, Jax. I want her to tell me if Cassidy’s okay.”

  “I really think you should wait for the doctor so he can explain it.”

  “What aren’t you telling me?” Ace demanded, shrugging off the hand that Jaxon placed on his shoulder.

  Payton sat beside Macey and took her hand. “Just tell him, Mase.”

  Macey grimaced. “There was some damage to her uterine wall and they’re concerned she may not be able to carry a baby.”

  “What?”

  Macey nodded, her eyes filling with tears. She wiped them away quickly. “I don’t know anything else. They called in OB/GYN and the doctor’s an incredible surgeon, so I didn’t want to panic you.”

  “Fuck!” Ace stood and paced the room. Everyone left him alone, which was wise.

  ACE WASN’T ABLE to see Cassidy for another two hours. She was resting comfortably, or so they said, but she was out, so he took her hand and raised it to his mouth, kissing her palm. He could do nothing but wait.

  Her parents arrived an hour or so later and rushed into the room. After checking on Cassidy and kissing her cheek, Wendy wrapped Ace in a motherly hug. “Hi, honey.”

  Ace nodded and pulled away from her.

  “Your friend Payton is going to take Maverick to her home and we’ve asked her not to say anything until we can explain to him what’s going on.”

  “Thanks.” He felt like the walls of the room were closing in on him, the panic rising suddenly and far too quickly.

  “Son?” Patrick asked.

  “I need a minute,” Ace rasped, and stepped out of the room. Bending at the waist, he anchored his palms on his thighs and took several deep breaths.

  Visions of Cassidy being shot flew threw his mind, only it was him doing the shooting… just like in his nightmares.

  “Carter.” Jaxon wrapped an arm around his brother’s shoulders and led him to a chair along the wall. “Take a beat.”

  “I did this,” he whispered. “It’s my fault.”

  “No, you didn’t. You saw it comin’ and got to her faster than anyone could. This could have gone much, much worse,” Jaxon said.

  “She might not be able to have any kids. Th
at’s on me,” Ace argued. “I should have fuckin’ tied her to a chair instead of lettin’ her go into work.”

  “Look, I know nothing I say is gonna make you feel better, but you identified the threat and got to her faster than anyone could have. If you hadn’t, he could have gotten her leaving the building and she might be somewhere you couldn’t get to her. Trust me, brother, it could have been worse, and she’s alive because of you.”

  Ace dragged his hands through his hair.

  “Carter?” Wendy called. “She’s asking for you.”

  Ace shot to his feet and made his way back to the room, stepping to the bed. “Hey, baby.”

  “Where’s Maverick?” she asked.

  “He’s with Payton, honey. He’s safe.”

  “I want him here,” she said, grabbing his hand and squeezing. “Please, bring him here. I need to see him.”

  “Okay, baby. I’ll get Hawk to bring him.”

  “Don’t leave.”

  Ace smiled, leaning down to kiss her gently. “I’m gonna have Jax tell Hawk. I’ll be right back.”

  “He’s okay?”

  “He’s great, baby. I promise. No one’s told him anything.”

  “Wait,” she said. “Maybe we shouldn’t tell him yet.”

  “Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do it, honey.” Cassidy still hadn’t released his hand.

  “We should probably wait.”

  Ace kept hold of her hand as he sat in the chair next to the bed.

  “Are you in any pain, honey?” Wendy asked.

  “Not right now,” Cassidy said. “Everything just feels kind of tight.”

  Wendy fussed while Patrick sat on the other side of her, his hand on her arm like he was afraid she’d disappear. Two doctors walked in a few minutes later and closed the door.

  “I’m Dr. Nelson,” the surprisingly young surgeon said.

  “I’m Dr. Waring,” the older man with her said.

  “Perhaps we should get some privacy so we can talk,” Dr. Nelson said.

  “I’m fine,” Cassidy said. “They can stay.”

  Ace linked his fingers with hers. He had an idea of what was coming and knew she’d have a difficult time processing.

  “There was quite a bit of internal damage, which we were able to repair, however, we are still concerned about the damage to your uterus.”

  Cassidy gasped. “What happened to my uterus?”

  “The bullet damaged the uterine wall and I was afraid I’d have to perform a hysterectomy.”

  “Did you?” Cassidy asked, tears sliding down her face. Ace kissed her hand, laying her hand against his cheek.

  “No. I repaired what I could,” Dr. Nelson said. “But only time will tell if there any further complications. It’s possible you might not be able to carry a child, Cassidy.”

  “What?” Cassidy burst into tears.

  “We don’t know for sure yet,” Ace said.

  “But you want a hundred kids,” she cried.

  “There are other ways to get kids, baby,” he whispered, stroking her cheek.

  “It’s not a definite outcome,” Dr. Nelson said. “We have every hope that your body will do what it’s designed to do and finish off the healing process. We’ll keep a close eye on you and monitor you as you heal.”

  Ace watched as Cassidy shut down. He knew it the second her tears stopped and she started nodding at everything the doctors said. She’d checked out and wasn’t listening to anything they were saying. He did his best to focus on the doctor’s instructions because she’d need to know eventually.

  * * *

  Cassidy was sleeping and Patrick was making a food run while Wendy quietly read a book, so Ace stepped into the hallway to call Hawk.

  “Hey, Ace.”

  “Hey. Cass has to be here for at least a week, so I’m thinkin’ I’ll come pick up Maverick tomorrow and bring him, if that’s okay.”

  “No problem. We told him you and Cassidy were doin’ somethin’ so he got to stay the night with us. He’s happy, man. We got him.”

  Ace sighed. “Thanks. ’Preciate it.”

  “You wanna talk to him?”

  “No, because he might want to talk to Cass and she’s asleep.”

  “Good thinkin’. Okay, just swing by tomorrow whenever. We’ll be here.”

  “Thanks again.” Ace hung up and made his way back into the room, interrupting an argument between Cassidy and her mother. “What’s goin’ on? You okay?”

  “Fine.” Cassidy glared at her mom.

  “Hey,” Ace said, and sat beside her again. “What’s up?”

  “She thinks you two should break up,” Wendy provided.

  “Mom,” Cassidy snapped.

  “Why?” Ace asked carefully.

  “Because she’s decided that what’s done is done and since she can’t give you children, she’s useless to you,” Wendy said.

  “Mom, shut up!” Cassidy hissed.

  Ace stood and smiled. “Wendy, can I have a few minutes with your daughter?”

  “Only if you plan to talk some sense into her.”

  “Of course I do.”

  Wendy smiled, kissed his cheek, and sidled out the door. He went back to the bed, but instead of sitting on the chair, he sat on the mattress beside Cassidy.

  “We don’t have to make any decisions now,” Cassidy whispered, not meeting his eyes.

  “Look at me, Cassidy,” he demanded quietly.

  Her eyes flew to him and he raised her palm to his lips. “I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

  “I know you say that now because I’m lying—”

  “I swear to fuckin’ Christ, Cassidy, you keep talkin’ like that and I will handcuff you permanently to this bed. You’ll be stuck with me literally.”

  “You don’t own handcuffs,” she grumbled.

  “Yes I do.”

  “You do?”

  Ace nodded.

  “Do I want to know why you have those handcuffs?” she asked.

  “It’s not because of anything fun,” he informed her. “Look, this sucks. All of it. But we’re in it together and if you talk about us doin’ anything goin’ forward alone, I will lose my fuckin’ mind. I don’t love you because you can or can’t give me kids. I love you and Maverick with every part of me, and you are enough. You’re more than enough. If we want more kids and we can’t get them the traditional way, then we’ll adopt or use a surrogate, or whatever.”

  “But you want a lot of kids.”

  “You’re not hearin’ me, honey,” he said. “I want you more than I want more kids, Cassidy. I’ve tried livin’ without you. It doesn’t work and if you try to separate me from our kid, you’ll regret it.”

  “Dipshit bolt.” He could tell she was trying not to smile.

  “Fuckin’ nut,” he retorted.

  “I’m giving you an out, Carter.”

  “Fuck me, Cass, I don’t want an out.” He pulled their chains from around his neck and helped her put hers on, before pulling her engagement ring off his and sliding it back onto her finger. “You’re my world, baby. I can’t live without you. Either of you.”

  He leaned down to kiss her but she turned her head. “I haven’t brushed my teeth since this morning.”

  “I don’t care,” he said, and kissed her. After breaking the kiss, he stroked her cheek. “I’m gonna get your mom. No more talk of us breaking up, yeah?”

  “Okay,” she whispered.

  “I talked to Hawk and I’ll pick Maverick up and bring him tomorrow. Tonight he’ll stay blissfully unaware that anything’s wrong, yeah?” She nodded, her face contorting in pain. “How bad?”

  “Bad, but…” she said, and pressed the button for the pain pump, quickly falling asleep.

  ONE WEEK LATER, I arrived home to find my apartment spotless, organized, and filled with flowers. There were enough meals to feed the three of us for over a month, and my parents were staying in town for another two weeks to help.

  I would have limited mobility for sever
al more weeks, but it didn’t worry me because, not only did I never have to go back to work again, the company was covering all of my medical bills and Mack was working on a settlement which would set us all up for life. Admittedly, it was a really shitty way to get set up for life, but I was alive and I was grateful.

  We’d managed to fill Maverick in on as much as we could without completely freaking him out, but he was a smart kid and he didn’t like to see me in pain, so he hovered a lot. I was glad it was summer so that he could just hang out with me and watch me heal. He wouldn’t have done well if he’d had to go to school every day and function.

  Something I hadn’t been prepared for were the nightmares. I would relive the incident over and over again, several times a night, and I hadn’t slept well in quite a while.

  A few days after I arrived home, I was planted in the recliner my dad had bought since it was too painful to stretch out flat, and Carter walked in from walking the dog. Maverick was on the sofa and we were watching a movie. “Hi, honey,” I said.

  “Hey.” Carter leaned over to kiss me. “Do you need anything?”

  I shook my head with a smile. “Mav’s got it covered.”

  The pain was beginning to get worse, but I wanted to try to wean myself off the narcotics, so I tried to wait longer each time.

  Carter sat next to him. “Thanks, buddy.”

  “No problem.”

  “You okay?” I asked.

  Carter nodded. “Yeah. Just got a weird phone call.”

  “Weird good or weird bad?”

  “Good,” he said.

  “Club business?”

  Carter shook his head. “The house next door to Hawk’s is for sale.”

  I widened my eyes. “The cute little blue one with the basement?”

  “That’s the one.”

  “And?”

  “Wondered if you wanted to buy it,” Carter said.

  I gasped. “Seriously?”

  “Yeah, babe.”

  “But what about your house?”

  “Aidan can rent it from me. Or buy it if he wants it. He’s open.”

  I blinked back tears. “You’d do that for us?”

  “Babe,” he said with a sigh. “I’m not sacrificin’ anything. I like it up here and Mav’s already in school right down the street. We’d be close to a brother, and you’d be close to Payton. It’s an ideal situation.”