Faith (Goldwater Creek Mail-Order Brides 1)

by Leighann Dobbs

  “What are you working on there?” Sally asked as she rubbed her swollen belly.

  Faith held the book up. “It’s a poetry book I found in the library at the ranch. It was so worn out that someone made this cover and I figured it must have special meaning.”

  Bessie Mae and Lorna exchanged a glance that made Faith nervous. Did they know something about the book? Maybe it really did have the map to the gold mine in it … or had the map.

  “I’m not sure who it belonged to,” Faith continued. “Inside it has the name Mary.”

  Darcy narrowed her eyes at Faith and leaned over to look at the page of the book. “You mean Jax never told you about Mary?”

  “No.” Faith looked around at the others who were all staring at her with various compassionate looks on their faces. All except for Darcy. Darcy looked like the cat who ate the canary.

  “Why, Mary was Jax’s wife. She was a saloon girl. I assume you know he has an affinity for them.” Darcy’s voice had a tone of importance. As if she was privy to Jax’s secrets and was now rubbing it in that poor Faith didn’t even know her own husband had been married before.

  Faith felt a stab of jealousy. She remembered seeing Jax with the saloon girl right after their wedding. Is that where he went at night? To be with saloon girls?

  But he had acted so tender and nice to her. Maybe it was all an act. Maybe he was that way with all women and she would just be another one of his conquests. Something convenient to have at home in between saloon girls. Had he frequented the saloons when he’d been married to Mary?

  Faith remembered the way he’d acted when he’d seen her with the book in the library. She’d thought it was because the book had the map to the gold mine, but now she realized the book had been important to him because it had been Mary’s.

  “What happened to her?” Faith asked. Had Mary left him because of his infidelity? Somehow the fact that Jax cheated on his wife made Faith feel a little better. She knew it should have made her feel worse, but if Jax was a cheater then she wouldn’t like him so much and it wouldn’t hurt when she had to betray him.

  “Run off? No. Mary died in a buggy accident along with their unborn child just over three years ago.”

  * * *

  Faith felt like she’d been slapped. Jax had lost a wife and and unborn child? Why had he never mentioned it?

  Her look of confusion must have been apparent and Darcy trotted off to the kitchen with a smug smile on her face while the other women suddenly became very interested in the sewing projects in their laps.

  Bessie Mae frowned after Darcy. She leaned over and patted Faith’s arm. “Don’t mind her. She was sweet on Jax. She’s just jealous that he married you and not her.”

  Faith’s eyes flicked toward the kitchen. “He never mentioned anything. Why wouldn’t he tell me about his wife … and child?”

  Bessie Mae shrugged. “Jax is a man of few words.”

  Few words, indeed. Darcy’s comment about Jax’s ‘affinity for saloon girls’ burned. She should have known better than to think Jax would be any different than Charles.

  For all she knew, Jax's late night excursions involved another woman. Not that she had a right to be jealous. She knew full well their marriage was just a business arrangement … but still, she’d thought it was becoming more than that.

  It was just as well that she found out what Jax was really like before she became too invested. He was following the same pattern as Charles. Acting nice at first, generous, kind. But sneaking off behind her back. Next the drinking would become more and more apparent—though Faith realized she'd never actually seen Jax drunk. After that would come the abuse, both mental and physical.

  He'd already started the pattern by lying to her. Well, not lying exactly, but a lie of omission. He'd been evasive when she'd asked if it was the saloon he went to in the middle of the night and now she knew why. It was a sure sign he was going to the gold mine and he did not want her to know about it. Just like Charles, he didn't want to let Faith in on his most important ventures.

  He'd also failed to tell her about his first marriage, a little detail that one should not forget to mention to their current spouse. Never mind that Faith had not told Jax about her first marriage. That was different, wasn't it?

  None of that was important now. What was important was that she'd discovered the truth before it was too late. Before she'd lost her heart. She had been right all along. There was no such thing as true love.

  Faith stabbed the needle into the fabric. It was for the best. Lefty had put the pressure on and she knew he would not wait long for her to give him the information he needed. It would be that much easier once she purged any feelings she’d started to develop for Jax Blackburn from her heart.

  Chapter 20

  Robertson was quiet again on the ride home which was just as well with Faith. She didn’t want conversation to distract her while she was busy making plans for the night’s activities in her head.

  A couple of times, she caught Robertson looking at her strangely out of the corner of his eye and she got the unsettling feeling that he knew something or wanted to say something to her but didn’t know how to say it.

  Was he trying to tell her something or was it just her guilty conscience? Faith decided to remain quiet pretending to focus on inspecting her sewing project so as to discourage any conversation.

  Thankfully, Jax was not at the ranch and Maisie was busy. Now that she had discovered the truth about Jax and made up her mind about what she was to do, she just wanted the whole thing to be over with. She couldn’t face Maisie, so she took a light, early supper and retired to her room, claiming that she still was not feeling well.

  The only bright spot in the day was that she did not cross Jax’s path. She had nothing to say to him. With any luck, she would discover the location of the mine entrance that night and be gone from Wild Heart Ranch and on her way back to Boston on the morrow.

  Laying her cloak on the bed, she slid the window open wide enough for her to wriggle through. She wanted to be prepared to slip out, without the creaky window giving her away, as soon as she saw Jax leaving.

  If he followed his normal pattern, he would take off on foot, heading west toward the mountains. Faith didn’t know how far the mine was, but it couldn’t be too far if Jax walked instead of taking Indigo. Either way, she had good sturdy boots and determination. She could make it.

  She settled into the chair by the window and waited for nightfall, praying that this would be one of the nights Jax ventured out to the mine.

  Several hours later, Faith was awakened by the hoot of an owl. She jerked upright in the chair. Had she fallen asleep?

  Panic surged inside her. Please don’t let me have missed my chance!

  But luck was on her side. She hadn’t slept through Jax leaving. A glance out the window revealed the dark shadow of a tall, broad-shouldered figure rounding the corner of the barn. Jax. He’d probably disturbed the owl on his way out.

  Mouthing a silent prayer of thanks for the bird’s warning, she threw on her cloak and shoved her upper body through the window, shimmying her legs over and dropping the short distance to the ground, then hurried to follow Jax.

  The path meandered through the woods, the trees providing Faith with much-needed cover. She was careful to stay well behind Jax and lucky that the moon lit the forest well enough for her to see where he was going. But even if it hadn’t, she might still be able to find the mine for she could see he was traveling a narrow but well-worn path.

  The forest was quiet. Only the rhythmic chirping of insects intruded on the night. When Faith glanced up, she could see the stars peeking out from above the canopy of leaves. The scent of damp earth and pine tickled her nose.

  Once, she stepped on a stick, the cracking sound sending her heart jolting. Jax hesitated and turned but she quickly jumped behind a tree, so all he saw was the empty forest.

  As she walked behind him, she scoured the forest for landmarks. A gigantic oak
tree, a narrow creek, two large boulders set next to each other. She would need these landmarks to be sure she was on the right path when she came back to show Silas the way to the mine.

  They’d walked for about twenty minutes when Faith could see the lights from a house shining through the trees. There was a house out here? It looked tall—two stories and definitely off the beaten path. Judging by the lights, it was occupied. Much to Faith’s surprise, Jax turned down a path that led to the house.

  Did he have a woman here?

  She knew Charles had frequented a similar house in Boston. That house had also been off the beaten path and filled with the kinds of women that married men didn’t want anyone to see them visiting.

  Her gut churned. Was this where he’d been going almost every night? The nerve of him!

  Faith followed him down the path and watched as he walked up the steps to the front door, opened the door and let himself in.

  Obviously he was a frequent visitor.

  When was he going to visit the mine? Would he do his business here at the house and then continue out to the mine after? Should she wait in the woods for him and how long would it take?

  Curiosity got the better of her and she crept closer to the house. The sound of women’s laughter and clinking glasses drifted out from inside, drawing her even closer. She suddenly found herself right below one of the windows.

  The windows were high, but she could stand on her tiptoes and peek right in. She just wanted a glimpse of what was going on inside.

  Resting her fingertips on the jagged, worn wood of the window sill, Faith raised up on her tiptoes, clutching the bottom of the sill for extra stability. Her nose just reached the bottom of the window and she craned to see what was going on inside—

  “Faith? What are you doing?”

  Chapter 21

  Faith whirled around. The sharp jab of a splinter stabbed into her index finger.

  “Rosie?” She recognized the other woman from the party. The saloon girl who’d had the bruise. Was she one of the women Jax came to ‘visit’ at night?

  Rosie was looking at her with raised brows, waiting patiently for her answer. Faith’s cheeks burned. What the heck was she supposed to say? That she snuck out of the house and followed Jax, thinking he was going to a secret gold mine?

  “Do you live here?” Faith decided to turn the question to Rosie so as to avoid answering her.

  Rosie glanced at the building. “No one really lives here. At least not for long. It’s a safehouse. I live in the boarding house in Goldwater Creek.”

  “Safehouse?” Faith studied Rosie skeptically. Apparently, ‘safehouse’ was a euphemism for ‘whorehouse’. “I’m not naïve. I think I know what goes on here.”

  Rosie nodded. “Good. I was hoping Jax would tell you. He should have told you long ago.”

  “Well, I don’t really think that’s something a husband tells his wife …”

  “Why not? You should be proud of him. He’s helped a lot of girls.”

  “Helped a lot of girls?”

  “Yes, and now you’re going to join him. That’s wonderful. I can’t thank you or Jax enough.”

  “Join him? What in the world are you talking about?”

  “Why, the safehouse for the saloon girls.” Rosie nodded her head toward the building.

  “Safehouse?” Faith felt like a parrot repeating Rosie’s words, but what in the world was the woman talking about? It almost sounded like this wasn’t a house of ill repute.

  Rosie burst out laughing. “Don’t tell me you thought this was a…”

  Faith nodded. “What do you mean that it’s a safehouse?”

  “It’s no secret that Cleb mistreats the saloon girls. Sometimes they get beaten pretty badly. Jax and Ryder Devlin bought this house out here in the middle of nowhere so that the girls would have a place to go to recover. Away from Cleb. Of course, it was all mostly because of Mary.”

  Mary again. Faith was getting a little sick of Mary. She just wanted to find out where the gold mine was and be gone, but this new information about Jax intrigued her and tugged at her heart.

  “What do you mean, it was because of Mary?”

  Rosie smiled. “Mary worked in the saloon when she and Jax met. You could practically see the sparks flying from across the room. Of course, that angered Cleb even more because he hates Jax … and to have him take an interest in one of ‘his girls’ really made him mad. Unfortunately, Mary suffered because of it.”

  “And Jax let that happen?”

  “No. Well, only once and just because he didn’t know the extent of Cleb’s anger. But once was enough. He got Mary out of there and married her. Of course, that made Cleb even angrier.”

  “But he couldn’t do anything to stop Cleb after that, or he didn’t bother because he already had Mary?” Faith asked, thinking it was the latter. It was just like a man to get what he wanted and then not care about others.

  “Oh, no. He wanted to stop him. But Cleb is even more powerful than Jax, so after they were married, they came up with the idea for the safehouse. Shortly after that, Mary was killed and we were afraid Jax would give up on the house.” Rosie gestured toward the building. “He pays for everything and brings us medical supplies almost every night.”

  “But he didn’t give up on the house.”

  “No. Though for a while he didn’t come out. He didn’t even leave his house for almost a year and he never spoke of Mary, or the baby, again.” Rosie’s face turned sad. “Bessie Mae and Ryder took up the slack. They doctor the women up as best they can. Sometimes Doc Schumann comes out, but not too often. We need to be careful so that Cleb doesn’t catch on.” Rosie looked at her curiously. “But surely you know all this. Jax must have told you.”

  Faith worried her bottom lip. Jax wasn’t coming out here carousing, he was helping the women! Faith’s heart hitched. Earlier in the day, she had been so sure that Jax was the same kind of jerk that Charles had been. But now, judging from what Rosie had told her, she’d been terribly mistaken.

  Shoot! She didn’t want to think that Jax was a nice guy.

  “So, he’s not out here drinking and womanizing?”

  Rosie must have recognized the tone in Faith’s voice. The tone of someone who knows what it’s like to be with someone who drinks, cheats and abuses you. Faith saw the same sympathy mirrored in Rosie’s eyes that she herself had felt when she’d seen Rosie’s bruises at the party.

  “Of course he’s not. But I suspect you’ve been a victim of that before, haven’t you?” Rosie asked.

  Tears pricked the backs of Faith’s eyes. “Yes. My first husband. He was a drinker and a womanizer and he beat me. That’s why I recognized the bruises that you had and why I felt so sympathetic toward the saloon girls.”

  Rosie threw her arms round Faith. “I thought so. How awful for you. But now you have Jax. Jax would never treat you that way.”

  Faith buried her face in her hands. “That’s the thing, Rosie. I don’t have Jax. I can’t have him. I have to pay for my husband’s debts and Jax will hate me for it.”

  Rosie’s brows mashed together. “What do you mean?”

  It was as if the dam broke. Faith hadn’t realized how much she’d wanted to unburden herself to someone. In between sobs she told Rosie about her marriage to Charles, how he’d died and left her in debt and Lefty’s threat to her sisters.

  “So, you followed Jax out here thinking he was going to some gold mine?”

  Faith nodded. “You see, I can’t let Lefty, or his henchman Silas O’Toole, hurt my sisters. Even if it means losing Jax. But now I’m not even sure there is a gold mine and if I don’t come up with one, I’m afraid Lefty will do something drastic.”

  Rosie glanced toward the house. “And Jax knows nothing of this?”

  Faith shook her head. “If he knew I followed him here, he’d probably send me out of town. You won’t give me away, will you?”

  “Of course not. But I think you should tell Jax your problem. He
can help you. Maybe he could even pay off Charles's debt. He trusts you and you should trust him.”

  Faith hadn’t even considered actually being able to pay the debt. Jax did have a lot of money, but she couldn’t use him like that. She could never ask, not after everything she’d done and after her plan to betray him. And besides, that debt was hers to deal with. She didn’t want to burden Jax with it.

  Her heart squeezed with the horrible realization that she still cared about Jax.

  “I’m not sure he really trusts me. He never told me anything about Mary. In fact, the first I heard of her was today at Bessie Mae’s sewing circle.”

  “But he trusted you with information about the saloon,” Rosie pointed out. “Jax is a good man. What happened with Mary and the baby nearly killed him. He would never talk to anyone about it. Ever. Hasn’t mentioned it once since that day. But I’m sure he would have told you in time.”

  “Maybe.” Faith wondered. But he hadn’t exactly trusted her enough to tell her about the safehouse, either. Then again, given the way she’d acted when he’d kissed her, it was no wonder he hadn’t told her. Maybe he had been planning to tell her about all of it, but her stiffening reaction to the kiss had him thinking better of it.

  What had she done?

  “Jax never rode in a buggy since that day,” Rosie said.

  “But we rode in it to the Easthams’ party and to the saloon yesterday,” Faith said.

  Rosie smiled. “That’s my point. It’s one of the changes that’s happened to Jax since you’ve been here. He’s happier. He’s opened up. The dark cloud that used to follow him around has disappeared. I always knew a good woman could help him find his heart again. I’ve seen the way he looks at you and that woman is you, Faith. You have something great within your reach. Don’t let it slip away.”