Unworthy Heart: The Donnellys, Book 1

by Dorothy F. Shaw

  Maiya Rossini: Ugh. Fine. See you then.

  Ryan Donnelly: Ha! That’s my girl.

  She rolled her eyes.

  Yep, I’m fucked.

  Ryan grabbed a six-pack of beer on his way to pick up Jacob, and then ordered a couple dozen wings to be delivered when he got home. While they waited for Maiya and their dinner to arrive, he made Jacob help clean up the little messes made from their morning hustle to get out the door.

  His son grumbled the whole time about wanting to play with his Hot Wheels, but Ryan wouldn’t let him off the hook until he’d done his age-appropriate share.

  The doorbell rang and Jacob ran for the door, complaints forgotten. “Maiya’s here!”

  “Wait for me, Jacob.” Ryan rushed after him, opening the door when they reached it. His son’s excitement was intoxicating.

  Maiya stood on his front porch, a paper bag in her hands with the name Manny’s Wings printed on the side. Her beautiful lips curved into a crooked grin. “Delivery.”

  “Damn, did that arrive the same time you did?” Heaven help him, she looked fine as hell. She was clad in a black tank top and blue jeans with her hair drawn up in a high ponytail. Positively edible.

  “Yeah. No big deal. Are you going to let me in, or are we eating on the porch?”

  He coughed a laugh and stepped aside to let her pass. The woman never failed to make him chuckle. He kissed her on the cheek, and Jacob wrapped his little arms around her legs, halting her movement. His child was making a habit of doing that. He guessed it was a good thing.

  Maiya stopped and looked down at Jacob. “Hey there, sweetie. Did you have a good day?” She smoothed a hand over his son’s hair.

  “Yes. We had a fire day,” Jacob said.

  Ryan took the bag from Maiya’s hands. “You had a what?”

  “A fire day. They made the alarm go off and we all hadda go outside in a line. No running or talking.”

  “Ohhh.” Ryan breathed a sigh of relief. “You mean you had a fire drill today.”

  Jacob looked confused. “That’s what I said.”

  “More or less.” Maiya bent down and hugged his son. “I think you scared your daddy and me for a minute there.” She mussed his hair.

  “Why?”

  “Don’t worry about it. Go get your cars. Maiya and I are going to set up dinner.” Ryan took her hand and led her toward the kitchen.

  Jacob ran off toward the family room. A minute or so later the sound of the television made its way into the kitchen. Maiya grabbed plates out of the cabinet. “That child is way too smart for his age. He sure has the TV figured out, huh?”

  “He is male, after all. I think we all come out knowing how to operate electronics.” Stepping behind her, he wrapped his arms around her waist and nuzzled her neck. “Mm, you smell good.”

  She sighed, covered his arms with her own and rested the back of her head on his shoulder. “You feel good.”

  They stood together for a few precious minutes, swaying back and forth. Satisfaction spread through him. Next to his son, there was nothing better in the world than holding her in his arms. Complete opposites, yet by some miracle, she matched him in more ways than he’d ever imagined. Maiya fit against him in odd, yet perfect precision.

  Somehow in the last few weeks, Maiya had carved a spot in his world, spun it off its axis, and then balanced it again. He was sure she had no idea it’d even happened, but Ryan intended to let her know. He just had to figure out how. Her stomach rumbled, pulling him from his thoughts. “Let’s get you fed.” Kissing her cheek, Ryan stepped away and arranged the wings on a serving platter. “I got hot and honey ones.”

  “Sound great.” Maiya set the plates out. “I looove the hot stuff.”

  “Why does this not surprise me?”

  “Oh, shoosh your face. I surprise you all the time.” She grabbed a lidded cup and straw for Jacob and opened the fridge. “What do you want him to drink tonight?”

  “Milk, if you please. There’s beer in there for us.”

  “Plying me with booze, I see.”

  “Yes, ma’am. Ain’t no shame in my game. Whatever it takes.”

  “O.M.G. If you start doing the cabbage patch, I might have to beat you with a hot wing.”

  “Oh yeah, baby. You know I can rock those moves all over this kitchen. Do not eeeven tempt me.”

  After setting their drinks on the table, Maiya turned, put her hands on her hips and tilted her head to the side, regarding him. Ryan tried like hell to hide his smile because all of a sudden she looked really damn serious. “Yes?”

  “Are you trying to scare your child? Or the neighbors?” She pointed at her chest. “Or me for that matter?” Unable to keep it together, she busted up laughing at her own comments.

  “Fail!” He pointed his finger at her. “You couldn’t hold that one together long enough to get a reaction from me.” He started busting a move—cabbage patching it right over to her. “Who’s yer daddy? Uh-huh, oh-yeah.” Spinning around, he shook his ass in front of her, well aware he was making a total moron of himself. But he didn’t care because Maiya was laughing so hard she had to sit down.

  “Stop—” She gasped for a breath. “Stop, oh my God, you’re killing me.” Clutching her stomach, Maiya laughed harder.

  Jacob must’ve heard the commotion because he came running into the kitchen and stopped short. His little mouth split in a wide grin and he watched his father lose all dignity in their kitchen. “Daddy, you’re silly.”

  Maiya scooped him up onto her lap. “Yes, he sure is. Are you ready to eat, sweetheart?”

  Jacob nodded and she stood and carried him to his seat. Still chuckling, Ryan sat at the table and dished out a couple of wings to Jacob. Maiya took her seat and followed suit, adding wings to her plate. They ate, chatted and joked around, enjoying dinner together. Man, how life had changed in such a short time.

  Maiya busied herself clearing the table while Ryan took his son upstairs for a bath. It’d gotten too late for Jacob to stay up for a movie, and the little man, bless his heart, wasn’t too happy about it.

  She’d promised him, as he pouted, that she’d come up once done in the kitchen and read him three stories again, like she had the other night. Poor thing was likely overtired from the activities at Chuck E. Cheese the night before and then the whole school thing.

  After she finished reading with Jacob, she and Ryan made their way back downstairs. She eyed the door across the hall from Jacob’s room before they descended the stairs. Must be Ryan’s bedroom, the one she’d yet to see.

  What did his room look like? She hadn’t thought much about it until now. Would he have it decorated much like downstairs? Guys usually didn’t care how their sleeping space looked. Hell, most guys rarely changed their sheets, and some were fine with not even sleeping on sheets at all. Gross-out city for sure. But Ryan…he probably had clean, pressed sheets on his bed. She chuckled. Shit, she bet he made his bed every morning right when he got out of it too.

  “What’s got you giggling?” He grabbed two more beers from the fridge.

  “Ohhh nuthin’.” She grinned. “Just had a funny thought.”

  He popped both caps and handed her the cold bottle. “Not gonna share?”

  “Nah.” Maiya grabbed her smokes from her purse.

  “Thanks for cleaning up, babe.”

  “No need for thanks. You cooked, sort of. I cleaned.” She made a beeline for the back porch.

  He followed her. “I could get used to this arrangement.”

  “And now, I need to smoke.” She opened the sliding glass door. Settling on the lounger, she stretched her legs out.

  Ryan picked up her feet, sat on the end of the lounge and placed them in his lap.

  She lit her coffin nail and inhaled deep, watching him while he slipped off her black Converse, and then her socks. Sh
e exhaled the smoke away from him. “Do not crack my toes.”

  Smiling, he started rubbing her arches. “How about I just tickle them?”

  “So, you want to get kicked in the face?”

  He raised a hand to his chest and gasped. “You’d do that to me?” He pouted. “Meanie.”

  “Killing me.” She moaned when he rubbed the ball of her foot.

  “Ditto.” He ran his thumbs down the arch to her heel. “Feel good, baby?”

  “Mmhmm.” Maiya watched his hands on her foot.

  He switched to the other and started the same deep massage at the ball of that foot. He found and rubbed the tight little tendons in her arch. It hurt a little, but it was a good kind of pain. Similar to sex with him. A little bit of pain, meant to bring pleasure, mixed in. A zing of arousal shot through her at the thought, and she shivered.

  “Cold, baby?”

  She crooked one corner of her lip in a grin. “Not really.”

  He raised his eyebrows, studying her for a moment, and then returned his focus back to her foot. Taking one last pull on her smoke, she stubbed it out in the ashtray on the little table next to her.

  “Ready to go inside?”

  “Yes. I’m so tired.” She smothered a yawn behind her hand.

  Ryan stood and grabbed both their beers. Picking up her socks and sneakers, she followed him into the house. He set the two bottles on the coffee table, careful to put them on coasters.

  “You’re the only guy I know who does that.”

  He looked up as he sat on the sofa. “Does what?” He patted the cushion next to him. “Lie down, baby.”

  She stretched out on the couch. “The coaster thing.”

  “My mother.” Pulling the afghan off the back of the couch, Ryan crawled behind her and then covered them both with the blanket.

  “Let me guess.” She snuggled her ass against his hips. “It was like a requirement in your house as a kid, right?”

  “Pretty much.” He nuzzled her neck. “Wasn’t like that at yours?”

  Grabbing the remote, she clicked on the TV. “Hell no. Trust me; there was nothing so normal as coasters in my house growing up.” She flipped through the channels.

  He smoothed his palm down her side to her hip. “Care to share what it was like?”

  “Ooh, Wedding Crashers.” She set the remote down. “I love this movie.”

  “I’ll take that as a no, then.” He kissed her shoulder.

  She turned her head to look at him. “I will. Just not tonight, okay?”

  “Whenever you want, baby.” He traced the seam of her lips with a fingertip.

  Nodding, she kissed his finger before turning back to the TV. A comforting silence settled between them. Ryan wrapped his arm snug around her waist, moving his hand on occasion over her stomach and hip, and then returning to her tummy. A sense of ease flowed through her. Maiya felt secure. Safe. Cared for.

  Different. So very different.

  She sighed and her body softened against his.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  “Wake up, Daddy. I’m hungry.”

  Ryan heard his son’s request through his sleepy haze. When he opened his eyes he was treated to the sight of flaming red hair and the feeling of his arm around Maiya’s waist. Then Ryan shifted his gaze and met the inquisitive set of young eyes belonging to Jacob—who was standing in front of them.

  In the living room.

  Them…

  They were sleeping on the couch.

  Fuck.

  “Uhh… Hey, little man.” He glanced at the clock on the DVD player: Six a.m. At least they hadn’t overslept for work. Ryan squeezed Maiya’s side. “Wake up, babe.”

  With a moan, she arched her back and pushed her ass against his—oh hell. Yup, into his morning wood. Dammit.

  “Are you hungry, Maiya?”

  Maiya shot up like a bomb went off beneath her…and slammed into Ryan, cracking him in the face with her forearm.

  “Owww!” Ryan clamped his hand over his jaw and chin.

  “Shit!” She looked—panic coating her features—between him and Jacob and then back to Ryan. She touched his face. “Oh, God. I’m so sorry.”

  “Why are you sleepin’ on the couch?”

  Ryan rubbed his palm over his now sore jaw. “Um.”

  “I’m sorry, sweetie. I guess we fell asleep watching a movie. I better get going.” Peeling the afghan off of them, she rose.

  Ryan grabbed the blanket and held it against his groin in order to conceal his morning arousal, and then got himself into a sitting position.

  “But it’s breakfast time.” Jacob fiddled with the waist of his pajamas, as if Maiya leaving so soon was nowhere near as important as breakfast. Amazing.

  “Uh…oh, um, okay. Let’s get some breakfast, but then I have to leave for work.” Maiya grabbed his little hand and let Jacob lead her into the kitchen.

  Ryan shook his head, got up and headed for the bathroom. When he returned, Maiya was at the table with his son eating cereal. His chest tightened at the sight. They looked so normal together. Ryan kissed the top of his son’s head and proceeded to make a pot of coffee.

  Maiya took off after she finished the cereal and a cup of coffee. Getting himself and Jacob ready, Ryan got his son off to school on the bus, and then drove into work.

  After a long day in the office, and only seeing Maiya a couple of times in the morning, Ryan picked up Jacob and made his way home. Damn, he was starved for the sight of her.

  “Daddy?”

  He looked up from the stove. “Yes, little man?”

  “Can Maiya come back for a movie tonight, since we dint’ getta watch one last night?”

  Ryan set the burner to low. “Didn’t and get to, little man.” He smiled. “I can call her and ask. She was pretty busy today at work though, so she may not want to.” Jacob’s brows drew together. Ryan walked over to him at the table. “I’ll let you know what she says. You and I can still watch a movie either way, okay?”

  “’Kay.” Jacob went back to coloring his picture. Ryan stepped away and slid the biscuits in the oven when Jacob spoke up again. “If she comes, I think you should sleep in your bed this time. You’re too big for the couch, Daddy.”

  Ryan froze, but for his mouth dropping open. When he turned around, Jacob’s focus was trained on his picture, blue crayon in hand coloring a balloon. As if he hadn’t said anything of importance. Only when Ryan managed to close his mouth and organize his thoughts, was he able to speak. “Jacob?”

  His son looked up at him.

  “What did you think about Maiya sleeping over?”

  “Told you. You should sleep in your bed instead.” Jacob tilted his head to the side, studying his picture.

  “Right. So, it didn’t upset you at all?”

  “I think Maiya is nice. And pretty.”

  Ryan walked over and knelt in front of him. “She definitely is both of those things. Hey, you know you can always tell Daddy if something makes you feel sad or upset at all, right?”

  “I know.” Jacob eyed his box of crayons. “What color should I make the pony?”

  Ryan leaned forward, kissed his son’s cheek and pulled out the yellow crayon. “This one.”

  Jacob giggled. “Daddy, ponies aren’t yellow.”

  “They can be. It’s your picture. You can make them any color you want. If you don’t like yellow, then pick another.” Ryan smiled and went back to making dinner.

  Wonders never ceased. He’d been torturing himself for no reason because it was obvious Jacob had no issue with Maiya being around. At all. Huh. He supposed most kids would be okay until, of course, the person they’d grown attached to wasn’t coming around anymore. Ryan hoped after this week, Maiya would want to stay around.

  He checked the biscuits in the oven and then dial
ed Maiya.

  Shock still vibrated through Maiya over what Jacob said about their chosen sleeping location. It was obvious, the child had no issue with her being there that morning. She was also convinced she might’ve lost her damn mind because she’d packed a bag to spend the night—plus a couple of changes of clothes. Just in case. God help her, she wanted to sleep in Ryan’s bed. Wanted to see his personal space and smell his sheets. And, for fuck’s sake, she was horny as hell. Crazy or not, she was staying there.

  Maiya pulled into his driveway, let go of the wheel and flexed her hands. They ached, and it dawned on her she’d had a death grip on the steering wheel the whole drive there. Nervous energy raced through her limbs. Why am I nervous? She closed her eyes and concentrated on her breathing. Not like this was their first time in bed together. Not even their first time sleeping next to each other.

  Waking up next to him had made all of this more personal though. Not that sex wasn’t personal, but sleeping next to someone was really personal. Way more intimate. When a person slept, they were vulnerable. And then there was cuddling—which was pretty much unavoidable with Ryan. He seemed to love wrapping his arms around her and keeping her close. Maiya didn’t have a shot in the world of not becoming more attached to him.

  Ryan had vaulted over all of Maiya’s walls, and it’d left her raw and exposed. What made it worse was she’d let him. If she was going to be honest with herself, she’d wanted him to bust through her barriers and bring her out of the detached dark place she’d existed in forever.

  The front door opened and Jacob came running out. Damn, she’d been sitting in the car for who knows how long trying to sort through her mess of thoughts and feelings. Ryan followed and scooped his son up into his arms. Time to jump in with both feet. Maiya got out of the car and pulled her small bag from the backseat.

  “Hey, baby.” Ryan zigzagged across the lawn toward her.

  She waved. “Hi.”

  “Hiiiii, Maiyaaa.” Jacob waved and giggled while Ryan held him over his head, moving him in the air like an airplane.

  “Hey, sweetie. Not sick of me yet?”

  When he reached her, Ryan snorted and kissed her cheek. Then Jacob kissed her cheek too.