by Jade Blue
(you can skim a few chapters before this to help you understand better)
CHAPTER 28: AVOIDING PROBLEMS IS BETTER....RIGHT?
I peeped to check if I can see him. It been 2 weeks since i've been avoiding Finn and Matt. Has it been successful? Well can giraffes do the shuffle? Nope.
I knew i had to do this though. It all made sense, after all. Matt didn't like that I was with Finn all the time. I mean I would have done the same if my friend was hanging around with this random girl. Matt is an ok guy. The last thing i want to do is make him mad. Not because i'm scared he'll hurt me but because I know how it feels to have something taken away from me. It sucks.
At the start it was okay, I was able to concentrate on my work which was something i never was able to do. My dad was proud of me but was worried I was just doing work all day and not having a break. Well I didn't want to. If i left my room or went somewhere, what if Finn came and said something.
It started to get worse when I was in classes with Matt and he tried to talk to me and ask what's up. I could always feel Finn staring at me whenever I ignored them after class. He must be so confused. If only he understood why i was doing this. I don't want to come between him and Matt.
So here I am, being cautious everywhere I go.
He wasn't there. Okay lets go. I had my books in my shivering hands as I walked towards my last class. Wow, why does avoiding people make me so nervous? I've done this so much times in the past. Avoided people in school who would try to talk to me or those who hassled me. But when it's avoiding Matt, it feels weird. Like I really don't want to see his sad hurt face. Oh, and also Finn of course.
I was about to walk into my class when to guys came infront of my all of sudden.
I was about to shout because I was used to guys in this school being idiots and coming in my way.
"Hey!" I said, as my books dropped from the shock. I didn't even want to see who it was and just bent down to pick my books up. Just as i was about to pick my last one, one of the guys picked it up instead.
I stood up and looked to see Finn and Matt staring at me with a frown.
My eyes widened. I didn't know what to do but snatch the book away from him and walk the opposite way.
As i was walking away I heard them following behind me. OKay okay okay this day is not going good.
How will I avoid them if their going to be following me ?
But i just kept walking feeling their eyes on me the whole time.
This was crazy. They not going to follow me for a long time right?
How do you avoid a problem when that problem is following you? LITERALLY
CHAPTER 29: GETTING CLEARER
I thought walking while ignoring them will help them get the message that i didn't want to talk to them but nope. I walked it outside to the fields but they were still behind me.
I sighed.
I looked towards to them. Finn was staring at me, trying to figure me out. I didn't even want to know how Matt was looking at me but still my eyes dragged to his hurt face. He looked at me for a second, but then looked at the ground. I didn't know what he was thinking.
I looked back at Finn and said, "What?" I tried to be as casual as possible, something I'm very good at.
"What the hell Cece?" Finn said. I think it was the first time I heard him curse.
He continued. "What's happened with you? You can't just ignore us and think that it'll be fine."
"I-" But he interrupted me.
"You know, I never knew you were someone who could just invite people into your life and push them away. I can't believe you."
I was about to say something. Anything to help him realise that I'm not like that. But for some reason, I couldn't. I just listened to him saying the absolute truth. I looked at Matt, he was looking at me and then looking at me Finn. He was thinking about something while listening.
I had to say something.
"Okay!" I half-shouted. Finn stopped talking.
"I'm sorry, okay?" I said.
Finn shook his head. He didn't believe me.
"Look, I need to pass this year and I can't distract myself."
"So you just completely stopped ignoring me?" Finn said.
I didn't know what to say. I thought my excuse was enough for him to say okay but he made a good point.I didn't have to completely ignore him if I trying to concentrate on my studies."
I looked down. "I don't know what I'm doing." I said.
"Exactly." Finn said. I looked at him. He looked angry. He turned around and walked away.
I could have called him and explained to him but I couldn't. I felt like an awful friend.
I looked at Matt. He was staring at me, trying to figure me out. I didn't know what to say to him so I just started walking away from him.
He quickly came infront of me.
"Okay, what happened?" He said.
I was angry now. Didn't he understand why I was doing this. I was doing it for him but he was so confused.
I didn't want to come between him and Finn. The way he got mad at me. It was obvious right?
"You wanted this to happen, right?" I said, a bit roughly. I don't know why I felt so weak when I'm with him. I just want this all to go away and it'll all be fine.
He looked at me confused. "I don't understand."
"Look, why were you angry at me?" I said. "Because I was hanging around with Finn right?"
Matt looked down. So I was right. I was taking his best friend away from him.
He looked so tired. Like he hasn't been sleeping well.
I felt weak again. "I won't go near him then." I whispered.
He looked up at me. "He's your friend. He's hurt that you just randomly stopped talking to him. it isn't right."
I sighed. " I know but you feel that I'm taking him away from you."
"Wait what-"
I interrupted him. I had to tell him and make him understand that i won't hurt him. "He's been your best friend all your life. I understand if you don't want me in the picture. I'm just coming in the way."
"Wait stop." Matt said shaking his head. He put his hand on my shoulder to stop me from blabbering. I felt weaker when he touched me. He was talking but i couldn't concentrate with his hand on my shoulder. He noticed and apologised.
I looked back at him. "Cece." He smiled.
"I don't think you're coming in the way at all."
" You don't?" I said, looking confused.
He laughed. "You guys are my friends. I'm cool with it."
I looked down, feeling like an idiot.
"But-"
"Look you have nothing to worry about. You're a good person. I know you."
He said. "Come on, we'll go tell Finn it was just a misunderstanding."
I nodded.
I guess avoiding problems was stupid as hell.
We were walking it to the school.
"Wait." I said, as i stopped. He stopped too and looked at me.
"If you're ok with me hanging around with him, then why did you get mad when I was with Finn a few weeks ago? Remember? When I was playing pool with him, you got angry at me. There was was something up"
I looked at him, demanding an answer.
"You were really pissed off. But why?"
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NEXT UPDATE SOON - TODAY OR TOMORROW
Chapter 30: GOOD MORNING? NAH
"Look, I thought we were going to go to Finn and sort this out." Matt said, avoiding my question.
I frowned. Is he serious? It was so obvious what he was trying to do.
Why can't he just tell me why he hated seeing me and Matt together? If it wasn't because of me stealing his friend, then what was the reason?
Matt was looking everywhere but not on at my face. This got me angry.
"Just spit it out." I said.
He looked at me, eventually. He looked so tired and upset for some reason. Like i told him to tell me his biggest secret.
"Okay, I'll tell you." He said. "But you're no
t going to like it."
This got me more curious. So it was something that I will be mad about?
"I don't care. I'd like to know." I said, trying not to get mad. Why do i get so mad when I'm with him?
"Well the thing is.." Matt, said, fidgeting with his jacket zipper. "I don't know what's been happening to me these days. Since you came here, everything has been different."
I looked confused. Different? Like what? I wanted to say this but It looked like he was trying to explain it himself. I felt that if i interrupted, he will change his mind and not tell me.
"It's just that when we kissed, I felt something." He said.
My eyes widened. I, all of a sudden, felt uncomfortable. I can't believe this. He feels something?
Does he... you know.. like...no ofcourse not Cece, how can he..
He looked at me, trying to study my face.
"You- you felt some - something" I stuttered.
He pushed his hair back. "I don't know what it is but it feels so weird." He said. " I don't know how i'm exactly feeling but i know that its because of you."
"Me?" I said, still not understanding.
He smiled. "Yeah, you."
I kept listening.
"Ever since I met you, you've changed me. I can't stop thinking about you, I can't do anything. These weeks that we didn't talk was weird as hell and I.."
He looked so tired and upset. I wanted to tell him its okay but his words were ringing in my head. He couldn't stop thinking about me?
"I don't know.." He said. "I guess i like you." He said.
I didn't know what to say. I just stood there staring at him thinking if this was real or not.
"Cece." He said. I was dazed out. How long was I dazed out for? it felt like minutes.
I looked at him.
"So?" He said. Wait, did he want me to confess back? But I couldn't. I don't know. I just-
My phone rang. I got it out of my bag and looked at Matt. He was still staring at me, i guess, waiting for an answer.
"Hello?" I said, trying to sound normal eventhough I was freaking out inside.
"CeCe?" My dad said. He never called me so this was weird. I didn't even know he had my number.
He continued when i confirmed it was me. "CeCe, well erm you're mother is here." He said.
I sighed. Okay, its only 10am but this day is going to be long as ever.
Publication Date: June 6th 2016
https://www.bookrix.com/-blueheart09
