Chasing Xander

by Lexi Lawton

  There was a long pause, the silence filled only by the sound of Xander’s heart thundering in his chest. His goal had always been to run for fraternity president during his senior year, and he had a good enough rapport with the rest of the brothers to actually win. Or he thought he did, but if Brad was getting the brothers to talk shit about him… Brad really was a dick.

  “Bring me proof, and I’ll let this slide.”

  “Bring you proof?” He clenched his hand into a fist.

  “Yes. I don’t believe you’re actually at a funeral. I think you’re just goofing off.”

  The vein in Xander’s temple throbbed with rage. “What is it you’d like, Brad? A picture of the coffin? Maybe the death certificate? You’re fucking unbelievable! You know, never mind. I’ll take my chances pleading my case to the brothers.” Without another word, Xander ended the call.

  He tossed his cell phone on the sink and stood. His hands shook with anger. Who the fuck did Brad think he was? Proof of death? What an ass. Brad was totally out of line.

  He took a few minutes to calm himself, then checked his other messages. Finn wanted to remind him to call Brad. Celeste demanded to know why Kylie still wasn’t answering her calls and if he’d relayed her message from yesterday. Tanner and Ryder both reminded him about Mom’s birthday. Tanner also suggested the three of them hang out Friday night. His gut twisted at the thought of how many people he was going to disappoint. He was going to have to kiss a lot of ass to make up for everything. He left the bathroom.

  Kylie was sitting up in bed, and she smiled when she saw him. “I thought you’d left.”

  He was so far past the point of leaving; he couldn’t if his life depended on it. “I told you I wouldn’t.” He set his phone on the nightstand and climbed back onto the bed.

  She lowered her head and fidgeted with the blanket. “I know. In case you haven’t noticed, I have a hard time with people making promises. No one ever keeps them.”

  “I do.” Well, except that one time he’d promised to call and he hadn’t. The look of utter disappointment she’d given him… He’d learned his lesson. He never wanted to see that look on her face ever again, especially not because of him.

  She nodded and continued to play with the blanket.

  He took her hands into his, stopping their nervous movements, and he tugged her toward him. His heart was firmly lodged in his throat, and his stomach was somewhere near his feet. It was now or never. He needed to tell her how he felt so they could move past this limbo they seemed to be stuck in.

  “Being as we’re here until tomorrow, want to go to McThirsty’s tonight?” she asked. “It’s a sports bar with a full kitchen. We can get some dinner and then hang out with Paige and some of my other friends.”

  “Yeah, if that’s what you want to do.” After her confession last night, he couldn’t believe she wanted to go to a bar.

  “I do.”

  “All right, then, let’s get ready and we’ll go.” His pulse slowed a bit, knowing he could put off that heart-to-heart a little longer. Lord knew he had no idea what he wanted to say or how she’d handle it. Besides, after the past few days, she probably didn’t need any more emotions hurled at her. “Okay, I’m going to head back to my room and shower.” He stood. “I’ll meet you here in an hour or so?” That would give her time to get ready and him time to call his brothers back. “Oh, Celeste has been trying to call you.”

  “I know. I’ll call her back soon.”

  “Okay. See you in a bit.”

  Kylie scrambled off the bed and flung her arms around his waist before he made it to the door. The force of her embrace made him stumble back a step, but he caught himself before falling. “Whoa.” He laughed and returned her hug, burying his face against her neck.

  “I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done. I know how much you’re risking by being here with me, but I wouldn’t have made it through last night without you.”

  He closed his eyes and squeezed her to him. “Don’t worry about me. I want to be here with you.” He kissed her neck, and she tilted her head, giving him permission. Moving down, he puckered his lips to her throat, and she moaned. She might as well have poked him in the balls with a branding iron for how his body sizzled with energy.

  He flattened his palms against her back and let his hands roam lower. She arched into him, her breasts pressed to his chest, and the thin cotton shirt she wore did nothing to hide her hard nipples. He could have her right now, and she’d let him. The temptation was palpable.

  She gently scraped her fingernails along the nape of his neck, and he lifted his head to look at her. The desire burning in her eyes stole his breath, and he knew if he didn’t let go of her right now, things would get out of control. But before he could release her, she pulled him closer and rose up on her tiptoes to reach his mouth. He turned his head, her lips landing on his cheek.

  She pulled away. “Why won’t you kiss me again?” She crossed her arms, her frustration evident in her tone and posture.

  His heart thudded hard, causing him to suck in a lungful of air. How the hell was he supposed to honestly answer that without getting into a long discussion about his fears and doubts? He wasn’t ready to bare his soul like that yet. He needed a bit more time to figure out what to say to her. “Because I know once I do, I won’t want to stop.”

  “And that’s a bad thing?” She looked up at him from under her thick lashes, her innocent gaze like a match to gasoline, and he was the kindling going up in flames.

  He swallowed hard. “No…it’s just…” Shit. He had no idea what to say.

  She pulled away. “Forget I asked.”

  “Kylie.” He sighed and hung his head. “Look, my reputation on campus isn’t exactly a secret.” He risked a glance at her, hating that he had to admit this. It’s one more thing he’d fucked up and couldn’t fix. “I’ve slept around, and I’m not proud of that. But I want to do things differently with you. I want to be better, for you.”

  “And that means you can’t even kiss me?” Her posture softened. “I do know how to control myself, you know. One kiss won’t end up with us naked and fucking like horny rabbits.”

  He laughed. “Horny rabbits?”

  “Shut up.” She stuck out her tongue.

  “God, you’re adorable.” He put his hands on her waist. “Please trust me on this.”

  “I trust you,” she whispered.

  “Thank you.”

  …

  “I still can’t believe Nammy Joyce is gone.” Paige shook her head. She had to shout to be heard over the live band.

  Xander nodded solemnly and took a pull from his beer.

  “Kylie’s lucky to have someone like you.” Paige nudged his shoulder with hers. She’d been subtly flirting with him since he’d arrived at McThirsty’s. He hadn’t given her any indication he was interested—because he wasn’t—yet she was persistent.

  He smiled politely and turned to look for Kylie. And he found her, too. He nearly spit out his beer, and his eyes widened. She was on the bar with a bunch of other girls, dancing suggestively. Holy fuck! The way she was moving her body… He’d never seen anything so erotic in his life. His already aching cock throbbed even more.

  The only male bartender in the place was on the bar with them, a bottle of liquor in hand, pouring it into their mouths. But when he got to Kylie, she shook her head and waved him away. Xander let out a sigh of relief. At least she wasn’t trying to get drunk. She’d had two sips of his beer; that was it. The bartender stopped behind Kylie and put his hand on her waist as if he was planning to grind on her.

  Oh fuck no! Xander set his beer on the nearest table and stalked toward the bar. He stopped in front of her and crossed his arms over his chest. “Having fun?”

  She smiled seductively and nodded. Then she shimmied her body around so her ass was in his face. He groaned. She was going to kill him with the way she taunted him, dared him to touch her, kiss her. Fuck her.

  He held out his hand
. “How about you come on down here and dance with me?”

  She stared at him for a moment but then took his hand. He helped her off the bar and wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her closer than he should. God, the way she fit in his arms, the way her body melted against his so perfectly.

  Kylie tilted her head. “You really want to dance? Or did you just say that to get me off the bar?”

  “Every guy in this place is looking at you.” He didn’t need to glance around to know. He’d seen them staring at her, and he knew damn well what was on their minds because he was having the same exact thoughts.

  “Not everyone.” Her tone was accusatory.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means the one guy I want to look at me isn’t. He’s too busy flirting with Paige.”

  He scowled. “I was not flirting with Paige.” Kylie really didn’t think that, did she? What had he done to give her that impression?

  “No?” She tilted her head as if trying to determine if he was being truthful. “You’ve barely left her side since we got here.”

  His jaw dropped. “Are you serious? You’ve been off chatting up your friends while I stood alone in the corner. She’s the only other person I know in this place.” He took a step closer, determined to make her understand just how wrong she was about this whole situation. “And for your information, my eyes have been on you all night, Ky. I couldn’t look away if I wanted to. And believe me. I don’t want to.”

  “Prove it.” She took hold of his hands and moved them down her body until his palms were on her ass. And then she moved, twisting her hips, grinding against him, a faint, seductive smile on her lips.

  Xander’s hands lingered on her ass, his fingers itching to give her firm cheeks a squeeze, to jerk her tighter to his body. Better yet, to bend her over the nearest barstool and finally take what he’d been denying himself. Slowly, he moved his hands up to settle on her lower back. A flash of disappointment darkened her eyes.

  “You know.” She turned so her back was to his front, her nice, round ass planted firmly against his crotch. “Dancing usually requires you to actually move your body.” She rotated her hips, and his cock strained behind his zipper, begging for relief.

  Oh, he wanted to move his body all right, but not here in a crowded bar and not when they were both fully clothed. He’d been doing good keeping his distance and taking things slow, but then he’d put himself in a car with her, and the proximity had really messed with his self-control. The constant scent of her sweet perfume surrounding him. Her soft laughter ringing in his ears long after she left him. He swore her smile was permanently seared into his mind, her voice a lullaby he’d never be able to forget.

  Xander clutched her hips and moved in rhythm with her. He heard her sharp intake of breath, and then he felt her delicate hands covering his as she swayed to the music. She leaned back, using his body for support, teasing him to the point of frustration. Every nerve ending inside of him burned with lustful need.

  “You’ve been holding out on me,” she said, tossing a grin over her shoulder at him.

  If she only knew.

  “You really do have moves.”

  He laughed. She put her arms over her head and laced her hands behind his neck, pulling his head down slightly. He nuzzled her neck, inhaling her intoxicating scent and putting his mouth near her ear. “You have no idea the moves I have,” he said.

  Closing her eyes, she turned her head, and he could feel her breath on his lips, her fingers threading through his hair, stroking his scalp. “Show me, then.”

  His heart thundered in his chest. One small move forward and their lips would touch. He wanted to kiss her so damn bad. He trailed his finger down the side of her face and across her lips. He could kiss her right now. Surrounded by this many people, it would be safe, no chance of things going too far. But he hadn’t been lying earlier when he said once he started, he’d never be able to stop. He’d be careless enough to suggest they leave, and he knew she wouldn’t object.

  “Kylie.” His voice was strained. He removed her hands from his head and turned her so she was facing him.

  “I think we should go.” She smirked and walked her fingers up his chest, the light touch sending him into a tailspin he wasn’t sure he could recover from. For the life of him, he couldn’t remember a single reason why he wasn’t allowing himself to take what she was offering. Because that was the thing with Kylie—she wasn’t shy about what she wanted. She’d been very clear about it, and knowing she was a sure thing only made his restraint waver even more. But then the nagging voice in his head reminded him that even a sure thing could end disastrously.

  “Go where?” he asked.

  “Back to the hotel.”

  “And do what?” The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. Shit.

  She raised one perfectly arched brow, her intent clear even though she didn’t say anything.

  He removed her hand from his chest, unable to withstand the tempting torture her touch caused in him. “You’re sure you want to leave?”

  “Yes.” She gave a firm nod.

  He took a deep breath, knowing their reasons for leaving were different. “That’s probably a smart idea considering you have to meet your grandmother’s lawyer early tomorrow morning.”

  Her lips thinned into a tight line, and she narrowed her eyes. “Right…” She drew out the word.

  He waited for her to say more, but she didn’t. Regret and guilt and disappointment twisted his insides. He hated upsetting her. Shaking his head, he followed her outside. He pressed the unlock button on the key fob and opened the passenger’s door for her. She slid into the seat without a word.

  He got behind the wheel, started the engine, and pulled out of the parking lot. “I think we should talk about—”

  “No, we shouldn’t,” she snapped. Crossing her arms over her chest, she angled her body toward the window and away from him.

  Xander took a deep, controlled breath. He was smart enough to know when to shut up. He wasn’t, however, smart enough to figure out why she was suddenly so angry with him. They made the drive across town to their hotel in utter silence, which was both a blessing and a curse.

  As soon as he was parked in the hotel lot, she got out of the car and went inside. Sighing, he jogged to catch up and pulled open the door for her. She stabbed the elevator button much harder than necessary, and he knew he was in a shit-ton of trouble. Like usual, even when he tried to be good, he still fucked things up.

  The elevator doors opened, and she stepped inside. He followed. “Are you going to talk to me?”

  “I haven’t made up my mind yet.”

  He chuckled, which earned him a dirty look. Biting back his smile, he pressed the button for the fifth floor.

  She turned on him, her brows furrowed. “Do you know how incredibly frustrating you are?”

  “Excuse me?”

  “You keep telling me we have to take things slow, but then you look at me and touch me in these ways that make it seem like you want more. And the things you say…” She shook her head, the corners of her mouth turning down. “You talk like I’m your girlfriend, yet you won’t get close to me. I just don’t understand.”

  He hung his head. Before he could explain, the elevator doors opened. Like the total jackass he was, he stepped out, racking his brain for a way to make things better. She’d lost the most important person in the world to her, and now here he was, toying with her emotions because he couldn’t make up his damn mind what he wanted. But he did know. He wanted her.

  He glanced over his shoulder, then stopped. Where the hell was Kylie? She was behind him a second ago. He stalked back to the elevator and pushed the down arrow. A moment later, the doors slid open, and he came face-to-face with her. He tilted his head.

  “What’re you doing? The elevator’s not a damn carnival ride.”

  “Apparently, neither are you, but that hasn’t stopped me from trying, now has it?�
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  He stared at her, and she stared back, a faint spark flashing in her eyes. He laughed. She cracked a smile and then hid it just as quickly, but it was enough for him to know she wasn’t angry.

  At this rate, there was no way he’d make it through the next few days without slipping up, especially considering he was having a hell of a time not kissing her right now.

  Xander led the way toward their rooms. She stopped by her door. “Just tell me why.” Her voice was low, tinged with pain and sorrow.

  “Why what?”

  “Why don’t you want me? Am I not good enough for you? I mean, I’ve seen the girls you’ve been with, and granted, I’m not anywhere near as pretty as they are, but—”

  “Stop it,” he warned.

  “That’s it, isn’t it? I’m not up to your standards? I’m too fat? My boobs aren’t big enough?” Her tone remained level, as if she were talking about something as simple as the weather. “Maybe I’m not dumb enough or my hair isn’t the right color. My ass is too flabby.”

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about.” The muscle in his neck ticked, and his jaw clenched. If she seriously thought all of those things about him, about herself, then he really fucked up worse than he imagined.

  “Well, it’s gotta be something about me because, from what you’ve said, you don’t turn women down.” She stepped up to him, her face inches from his.

  He held her gaze, his heart in his throat as he searched her face. She was hands down the sexiest, smartest, funniest woman he’d ever met. Hell, if he could’ve built his dream woman, she wouldn’t stand a chance against Kylie. She was the entire package. How could she not see that?

  “Forget I said anything.” She turned her back to him and slipped her key card into the lock, but before she could open the door, he grabbed her and spun her around.

  He threaded his fingers into her hair, holding the back of her head, and then his mouth was on hers. She stood frozen, her eyes going wide, and then she relaxed. He parted her lips with his tongue, and her eyes fluttered closed as she leaned into him. Soft, supple lips worked against his, her warm breath mingling with his. She tasted like beer and strawberries. It was the most delicious flavor in the world, and he needed more. Moving his hands to her neck, he pulled her closer and deepened the kiss.