Every second felt like a lifetime. I tapped the screen on my phone again. Only another minute had gone by.
Ash stamped her paws.
“I know it’s cold. But let’s just wait a little more.”
He was late.
Maybe Miss Adeline wasn’t as convincing as I thought.
I tried to control the interval with which I tapped the phone screen but failed. Instead I’d increased to twice a minute. Another seven had gone by. Still no sign.
He’s not coming.
I didn’t want to voice that out loud. Didn’t want to disappoint Ash.
“Just another few minutes,” I said quietly through chattering teeth.
She shivered. We couldn’t stay much longer. I wouldn’t risk her already fragile health.
I cupped her face and kissed the top of her head. She nuzzled against me.
“I’m sorry, sweet girl. I thought—”
She leapt up and yanked on the leash, her tail wagging.
In the distance, a familiar form approached.
Tall. Muscular. Long, quick strides.
The closer he got, the harder she pulled. I couldn’t believe she had the strength. She nearly jerked me off the bench.
When he was on park grounds, I freed her.
She rocketed toward Teague and jumped when she reached him. He caught her paws and placed them on his stomach so he could rub down her sides.
She squealed and squeaked. He squatted, and she peppered his face with kisses.
I took in the scene with a full heart, the cold forgotten. The moment was bittersweet. We couldn’t stay out here forever. What would we do tomorrow and the next day and the day after that when she couldn’t see him?
I’d have to worry about that later.
He rose to his full height. She jumped again but followed happily as he strode toward me. With every step, my heart drummed in my chest in a pounding rhythm.
The last time I’d seen him hadn’t gone well. I was more hurt than angry over it, but in a lot of ways I was as thrilled to see him as Ash.
The brim of his baseball cap was low over his eyes so I couldn’t read his expression. When he reached the bench, I stopped breathing.
We stared at one another. A crackling snapped between us. He continued petting Ash, but his sharp gaze was locked on me.
“Pepper.” My name was a hoarse plea on his lips.
“Teague,” I replied softly.
Ash licked my knee in thanks, which jolted me back to reality. I scooted over to make room for him on the bench but put my bag so it would be between us.
I was afraid to be any closer to him than I had to be. Because like Ash, I’d missed him too.
He sat wordlessly. I pulled out the bowl, baggie of food, and a bottle of water.
“Thank you,” I said as I emptied the food into the bowl.
He held it in his lap. Ash gobbled it down in three point five seconds. Relief coursed through me at the same time worry did. Maybe we’d figured out why she wasn’t eating, and I might be able to get something in her in the morning, but what happened after that? Teague wouldn’t be able to do this every day.
I couldn’t ask him to foster her. She needed a forever home, not a temporary place she became attached to and then lost. That wouldn’t be fair to her. We’d just have to work through her separation issues until she was happy.
“I’m sorry.” He turned his head to me. The apology was in every line of his face.
“It’s—” I didn’t want to say okay because that was a lie. He’d been rude to me at the fire station, just like he had the first day we met. Even though I knew the root of the issue, I didn’t appreciate it.
“I don’t get scared,” he said before I decided how to finish my sentence. “But when he threatened you? I was terrified.”
My heart cracked at his concern.
“I can’t be the one to screw up your life.”
I put a hand on his knee, my bag barrier be damned. He stiffened and looked around in every direction as if paranoid. That set me on edge, but I took comfort that he didn’t dismiss my touch.
“I hated to put you in this position, but I was desperate. She wouldn’t eat.” I pressed my lips together when Ash pawed at his hand. “Now we know why.”
He leaned forward and touched his nose to her head. “I missed you too.”
Whatever anger and hurt I held onto shattered. This was the real Teague. I didn’t know how many people got to see this stripped down, authentic version of him. Heck, I didn’t even know him all that well. But I was certain. The sensitive man who met me in a freezing park on the chance he could get a dog to eat was the true version of himself.
She swiped at his chin and anywhere she could reach with her tongue. He didn’t seem to mind she had dog food breath.
He sat back straight but kept petting her.
“Mind seeing if you can get some water in her?” I poured a little into the bowl.
He didn’t even have to coax her. She lapped gently until it was gone. I poured a little more and she mopped it up too.
The pressure that had been on my chest since she’d stopped eating eased. She’d eaten. And she was happy.
We sat in silence for a long time. Ash was content to be nestled between Teague’s legs. I was fine with prolonging the moment too.
“I should go,” he finally said, though he made no move.
Everything in me rebelled at that. I wanted to ask him to come home with me, have supper, maybe take the dogs for their evening walk. Instead I stayed statue still.
Regret washed over his features. His strokes became stilted. Ash looked up at him as if she knew time was short. She put her head on his leg in a you’re not going anywhere gesture.
“I can’t do this every day.”
“I wouldn’t ask that of you.” And I wouldn’t. He had a life. He wasn’t responsible for me or the dogs.
We always found our way and we would again.
He brushed his thumb across my cheek. I closed my eyes.
“In another life . . .” he said hoarsely.
“This is the one we have.” I gathered the bowl and put it back in the plastic sack before shoving it into my bag. “Ready to go home, Ash?”
I stood. She remained sitting on Teague’s foot. The next step would be her wrapping her paws around his leg and refusing to leave.
I hoped it didn’t come to that.
Reluctantly, he rose. As predicted, Ash still didn’t move, literally glued to him.
He looked at me helplessly. I lifted a shoulder and lowered it. There was no good answer.
“Will you let her sleep with you tonight?”
I was caught off guard by the request but nodded. Gently, I tugged on the leash. She wouldn’t budge.
Teague unwrapped the scarf around his neck and held it out to me. “It’s only fair since I have her paw print.”
Oh God. My chest tightened painfully when he patted his pocket. Did he have the imprint with him? Had he the other day?
I swallowed hard, my throat too clogged to speak as I accepted the scarf.
He bent to kiss Ash’s head and whispered something against her fur.
A crushing sensation walloped my heart. She whimpered, as if she knew this was goodbye.
He flicked his chin at me and walked off without looking back. Ash struggled to chase after him, even pulling me a few feet. She barked until he was out of sight. No words I used to try to calm her worked.
I wrapped the scarf around her neck, hoping Teague’s scent would soothe her.
Ash tried to pull me in the direction he’d gone but eventually conceded to heading home.
I knew without a doubt she wouldn’t eat until she saw him again.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Teague
I emptied my pockets onto the dresser.
When my fingers grazed the mold of Ash's paw, pain and anger stabbed at my chest. Trauma had a way of bringing people—and animals—together. We’d gone through the
same fire. That gave us a connection very few could understand.
But I’d never expected she wouldn’t eat because of me.
When had anyone ever cared enough to stop eating because I wasn’t around?
The only person who might’ve come close was my mother. I hadn’t been able to keep anything down after she’d died. Grief and horror had nearly overtaken me . . . and I’d only been five.
Beau and Lincoln hadn’t taken it well either. Maybe that was why the three of us were so close. The shared loss.
I had no doubt they’d be upset if something ever happened to me, but seeing Ash strain to get to me and the way she’d jumped all over me once she did . . . I’d never known a feeling like that.
It was one I still couldn’t quite wrap my mind around.
That sense of being needed . . . I realized I’d been missing that.
Which was crazy. I had the guys at the firehouse. I had my family. It wasn’t like I was lonely and isolated.
Nevertheless, I’d never forget that bittersweet moment.
And Pepper.
Her reception had been more reserved. Truthfully, I’d been stunned to see her. Miss Adeline had called the station, and I hadn’t been able to say no when she told me Ash wasn’t eating, consequences be damned.
There’d been so many things I’d wanted to say to Pepper. But I hadn’t been able to think of a damn one of them. Even underneath the veil of worry, she’d been as beautiful as ever.
I was sure contacting me had been a last resort. Yet I admired how in tune she was with the dogs. How she’d put together Ash wasn’t eating because of me was incredible. Only someone who loved those animals would be able to do that.
The entire scene hadn’t lasted long, but I’d been drained when I left. Emotionally. Mentally. Physically.
Seeing those two had been a jolt of energy and the ultimate crash when I’d left them. I wanted to call Pepper to see how Ash was doing—how she was doing. But I wouldn’t push my luck.
Knock. Knock.
My sister stood in the partially opened doorway to my room, looking as drained as I felt.
“What happened to you?” She made herself at home and sat on the bed.
“I could ask you the same.” I reached behind me and pulled off my sweater and undershirt.
I rifled through my bag until I found a fresh T-shirt.
“Please don’t change your pants in front of me,” she groaned.
“You’re the one who barged in my room.”
“Remind me not to do that again.” She collapsed sideways onto the mattress.
“Lincoln home?”
“I don’t think so. But I haven’t seen him all day. Dad’s had me shadowing him like I’m his personal assistant.” Her head lolled to the side.
I sat in the corner chair. “You never did take orders well.”
“Like you did either,” she shot back and then sighed. “I’ve been with that man for twelve hours and the only thing I learned is I put too much sugar in his coffee.”
I could barely spend twelve minutes with him. How she’d withstood that long was a testament to her strength.
“What were you expecting to find out?” I yanked off my boots and tossed them to the side.
“Why he’s pressuring you to work at the company.”
I sat straighter. “Did you ask him?”
Her gaze was cutting. “No. I’m not an idiot.”
“I didn’t say you were.” My patience was quickly wearing thin.
I’d seen an exploded body. Gotten a reaming from the captain in front of everyone. And then there was the whole thing with Pepper. I didn’t have the mental energy to fish for information from Beau.
“It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Since he pushed.”
I thought back. “Maybe a year.”
Time ran together and he’d demanded so much I’d lost count.
She put a hand to her forehead. “There’s something going on. First, he drags me back here—”
“You mean the trip wasn’t something you wanted?”
Guilt morphed her features. “No.”
I figured her being back in New York was business-related first, but knowing she had no desire to be here, to see Lincoln and me? It felt like she’d slapped me.
“I see how it is.” I couldn’t look at her.
“Teague. It’s not you and Lincoln. I love you both more than anything.”
“Then why’d you run away?”
I understood needing distance and separation from our father, but she’d moved half a world away.
“I didn’t run away. I ran to London.”
My gaze snapped to her. What could’ve possibly drawn her there of all places? She’d done a study abroad program in college over in Europe, but she’d never mentioned any ties.
I’d always prided myself on how close I was to my siblings. We knew practically everything about each other. At least I thought we did.
“Don’t get that wounded puppy look.” She sat up.
“I’m just trying to figure out what I’m missing.”
The ink had barely dried on her master’s diploma before she’d convinced our father to set up operations in London and hopped a flight to spearhead the entire endeavor.
“Don’t bother.” She slapped her palms on the edge of the bed and pushed up. “I’m calling it a night.”
I caught her hand as she passed. “I know I’m your brother and there are things you’d probably rather keep from me.” She smirked, and I squeezed her fingers. “But you can talk to me. About anything.”
She squeezed back. “Same goes.”
“I Got You Babe” blared from the direction of the dresser.
Beau snorted. “Do you choose these ringtones?” She swiped my phone and dropped it into my lap.
Burke’s name flashed on the screen.
“You bastard. How’d you figure out my passcode again?” I laughed, more amused than annoyed.
A rustling came from the other end of the phone instead of a return jab. He cleared his throat.
“Cassano is dead.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Teague
The phone fell from my grasp onto the carpet.
“Yo. Teague.”
I dropped my chin to my chest.
Beau picked up the device and held it to her ear. She murmured and nodded, though her face was ashen.
Cassano is dead.
Cassano. Is. Dead.
I’d seen him a few days ago. We’d joked about who cooked a better chili. He’d been determined to get back to work in a few weeks.
“Doc says I’m doing better than expected.” He grinned. “I’ll be back making your sorry ass look bad again in no time.”
“You better. Captain’s getting bored with only having me to peg stuff on.”
He flipped me the bird.
“He’s really going to be after you when he hears your next ringtone. I’ll be calling you nonstop.”
He had. Two days ago. “Believe” had repeated so much Captain turned off my phone. And someone had already changed the ringtone.
How could a person playing pranks just the other day be gone now?
Beau ended the call and sat on the arm of the chair. “Heart attack. They’re not sure what caused it yet.”
“He was thirty-five,” I all but shouted.
She put a hand on my knee. “I’m sorry.”
“He was fine,” I whispered.
When I’d carried him from that townhouse, he’d been in bad shape. Life-threatening shape. But he’d pulled through it.
He was dead.
“They’ll have more details about arrangements tomorrow.”
Dread filled every crevice within me.
“Will you stay? Go with me?” I sounded like a little boy begging, but if anyone understood my hate of funerals, it was Beau.
“Yeah. I’ll stay.”
I couldn’t stand the worry on her face, especially knowing it was because of me.
> “I’ll be fine.” There was no other choice. That didn’t mean it would be easy. Cassano made some terrible choices in that fire, and ultimately, the ceiling would’ve collapsed no matter what we’d done. It still felt like I bore sole responsibility for his death, even though I knew full well accidents were an everyday part of the job.
“This isn’t your fault.” Her tone was stern, like she wanted to shake some sense into me.
“I’m gonna hit the hay.” I stretched my arms above my head and faked a yawn.
“Teague . . .”
“I’ve been up since four and get to do it all over again tomorrow.” I would’ve stood up for emphasis but didn’t want to knock my sister off the arm.
“Why didn’t you bunk at the firehouse?” Her gaze narrowed.
For someone who wasn’t around much, she sure knew a whole lot about how my schedule worked. I guessed I’d mentioned it in passing when we talked that I slept at the fire station a lot.
“Captain cut my hours. Lucky me, I get to sleep in a comfortable bed.” I meant that. Especially tonight. I couldn’t handle being around the guys. I needed to process . . . without all the prying eyes.
“Need me to wake you up in the morning?”
“I’ll set an alarm.” I pointed to my phone.
Instead of getting up, Beau clamped down on my leg. “Don’t let this eat at you. He wouldn’t want that.”
I remained still. No way would I make a promise I wasn’t sure I could keep.
Three hours later, I hadn’t moved from the chair.
My mind spun out of control. The fire. The collapse. The heat. The weight.
Had I done the right thing insisting we stay together that night? If I’d let him go upstairs alone, would he have avoided the collapsed floor or gone down with it?
The only way for certain Cassano would still be alive was if that fire had never happened . . . or we’d stayed outside.
But that wasn’t what we’d committed to do.
And I wouldn’t have found Ash. Or Pepper.
Was Ash okay? Giving her my scarf seemed like a cop-out. I should be there for her . . . for all of them.
Pepper had so much responsibility on her hands.
Crash: Crash & Burn Duet Book 1 (Shaken) Page 12
