Food for the Soul

by Ceri Grenelle

  “Think history is boring?” she asked, hoping he was considering what would happen if he ignored the negative stigma associated with doctor-patient relationships.

  “It’s not that it’s boring, I’m simply not a fan of focusing on the past.”

  “You have to know where you’re from to get where you’re going.”

  He sighed, an echo of a dramatic teenager. “My mother said that all the time, and I’ll tell you what I told her…over and over again. If you keep all your focus on the past, you’ll never see what’s right in front of you.” He sounded as though he spoke from experience.

  “You’re right,” she conceded, wanting to focus on what was right in front of her. “History is boring.”

  “Boring!” a loud voice from the doorway yelled. A small boy with short, wavy golden hair and caramel-colored skin ran into the hospital room. He couldn’t have been more than four years old. When he reached the bed, he placed his hands on the edge of the mattress and stood on his tiptoes to get a good look at Harper. “Hit your head?”

  “Yup.”

  “Does it hurt?”

  “Nope.”

  “Is your head made of stone?”

  “What?”

  “Grandpa always says Daddy’s head is made of stone, that he has a hard head. Maybe you have a hard head.”

  Harper was charmed by the small creature but worried that perhaps he’d run away from his parents to go exploring.

  “I think you may be right about Harper’s head, and it’s a good thing too. Speaking of your daddy, where is he?” Theo asked, ruffling the boy’s delightfully kinky hair.

  “Sorry. His grandfather couldn’t watch him today, but I still wanted to stop by and check on you,” Flynn said, running in after the small child.

  The charge of delight and attraction in the room amplified. Breathing became a struggle, and she was thankful the little boy and Flynn were currently holding Theo’s attention. In fact, the good doctor looked as confounded as she felt by Flynn’s sudden appearance. There was something between the three of them, and it wasn’t brought on by her messed-up brain, she was sure of it.

  “You were here all night.” Harper’s bruised brain finally registered what he had said. “Is he…?”

  “Mine?” Flynn crouched behind the boy and tickled his ribs. “Yes, though I firmly believe he is part monkey.”

  “Daddy!” The little boy giggled at his father’s outrageous claim.

  Not for the first time since meeting him, Harper checked Flynn’s left ring finger for any sign he was taken. The finger was bare, and there wasn’t a tan line or indentation from a former ring. She glanced up to find he’d caught her looking. She was too inquisitive about his marital state to feel any proper shame for snooping.

  “His mom is out of the picture, has never been in the picture beyond giving birth to him, actually.” Flynn shrugged, smiling down at the small boy who currently was tugging on Dr. Backstrom’s pant leg.

  “Yes?” the doctor asked, leaving the bed to kneel in front of the kid.

  “What’s yer name?”

  “Theo. What’s yours?” Dr. Theo reached his hand out for the small boy to shake. The kid took Theo’s index finger and shook it enthusiastically, looking up at his dad for approval.

  “Very good. Now introduce yourself. He asked what your name was.”

  “I’m Ben.”

  “It’s nice to meet you, Ben.” Dr. Theo looked bewildered by the small rambunctious Ben, but at the same time, Harper could see the boy leaning in and giving himself over to the doctor’s care. There was something achingly powerful in Theo’s bearing, a force of nature that compelled her to trust him; she couldn’t blame the little boy for grinning up at the doctor as he was.

  “Dr. Backstrom?” A male nurse popped into the room, a sour look on his face. “A word, please?”

  In an instant that felt something like a black hole sucking the life out of the room, the warmth retreated from Theo Backstrom’s face and he donned a mask. Harper couldn’t reconcile the cold man who stood to greet the nurse with the happy man from a moment ago. He nodded at them to excuse himself, as though they were strangers, as if he hadn’t spent the last day diligently watching over her when a nurse could have done it all.

  Harper glanced at Flynn to see if he’d noticed the dramatic change. He faced the doorway, but she could still see his profile. His eyebrows turned down, and his mouth had thinned to a slim line of dissatisfaction. It seemed she wasn’t the only one taken aback by Dr. Backstrom’s abrupt shift in character. Perhaps he was like this with all his patients, and the warmth she’d felt was part and parcel with the job. A wave of nausea crested in her stomach, and Harper knew it had nothing to do with her concussion. She glanced over at Flynn again, the unease within increasing. She’d been content with living a solitary life for a long time, dedicating herself to serving others. How could that have changed this rapidly? Her concussion must have been worse than she thought.

  With a sigh, Flynn turned back to Harper and collapsed into the chair he’d occupied through the night. He’d gone above and beyond for her, and she barely knew a damn thing about him. How could he have never mentioned he had a son?

  Harper reached her hand, palm up, toward Flynn, and he clasped it without hesitation. She put aside her pride and looked him straight in the eye. “Thank you, Flynn. You saved my life.”

  Flynn pulled his hand back to tip an imaginary hat. “All in a day’s work, ma’am.”

  Ben pulled his father’s bag open and began to riffle through it, a fierce look of concentration on his chubby-cheeked face. Once he found what he was looking for, he grinned in triumph.

  “You have a son,” she said as Ben played with a yellow toy airplane, his imagination turning the small room into an endless horizon of a cloud-filled sky. “What else don’t I know about you?” Harper tried not to sound annoyed that he hadn’t told her about Ben previously. It wasn’t her business.

  “As I only volunteer at the kitchen every other Saturday, and you are usually so busy you can barely say hello, there is a lot you don’t know. The mystery isn’t one-sided. I may work for you, but I don’t know a lot about you either.” He paused, taking a second to lick his lips. The small motion made her stomach flip again. “I’d like to know you.”

  “You don’t work for me,” she said, focusing on anything but the way he made her body react. “You work for—”

  “The community—yes, I remember the spiel you gave me when I first came to volunteer.”

  “It’s not a spiel; it’s the truth.” She didn’t know him well enough to tell whether he was joking or not. “We’re there to serve.”

  Flynn leaned forward to rest his hand on what she knew was a massive bruise on her face. The bastard had got her good. “And look what they gave you in return,” he said quietly.

  “It’s not his fault—”

  “Was it his fault to steal from you and hurt you? Yes, Harper, I think it was.”

  “You sound like all the corporate bastards who don’t understand. The people in downtrodden communities, the circumstances of their birth and the life they grow up in give them no choice but to become what they are. They have no opportunities for betterment, and their fates are decided by those on the outside because of where they live.”

  Flynn moved rapidly from the chair to the bed, cradling her face in between his large palms. Where Theo was lean, Flynn was muscular. Not overwhelmingly, but thick and sturdy, someone she thought she could lean on.

  “What are you doing?” she asked when he sat there, holding her and not talking.

  “Keeping your brain from moving this way and that. You need to rest, not argue. Although I hear that’s hard for you to do.” He trailed his hands down to her neck, tripping his thumb along a scratch under her chin. “Don’t compare me to those blockheads, Harper. I know what life growing up in a rough neighborhood can do to you, what it can turn a person into. But you still have the choice. There’s always a choice.”r />
  “Even when that choice could get you and your family killed by the gangs down the block?”

  He closed his lids and sighed before opening them and saying, “Even then.”

  They sat there for a moment, looking at one another, and although Flynn had been volunteering at the kitchen for a while, Harper had been lying to herself about how attracted she was to him. Not thinking this was the appropriate time to pursue that line of thought, she again focused on something else. She was good at avoidance.

  “Blockheads?”

  He grinned. “I have an impressionable son. Be thankful he didn’t hear you say the other b-word. He’d be repeating it to his preschool teacher in no time, and then I’d be getting called in for parent-teacher conferences.”

  “Preschoolers have parent-teacher conferences? What could they possibly be telling you? Ben’s coloring skills could be improved, but he keeps his cubby extra clean?”

  Flynn laughed, the sound an exquisite baritone. He didn’t remove his hands.

  A scuff from the door broke the spell, and they both turned. Well, Flynn turned and kept Harper’s face immobile. She tapped his hands in annoyance.

  “Apologies. I didn’t mean to interrupt.” Hearing the doctor’s voice, Harper pulled Flynn’s hands away. She gingerly turned until she saw the man standing in the doorway. The cold demeanor had vanished now that the nurse was gone but with it his flirtatious confidence. He gestured from one to the other. “How long have you two been—”

  “We’re not,” they both said quickly.

  “Jinx!” Ben yelled from somewhere beneath the bed.

  “Sorry. Not that I wouldn’t want to—” Flynn began before giving her what she could only call the stink eye. “Quick to deny you’re dating me, aren’t you?”

  “You denied it first!”

  “I didn’t want Theo to get the wrong idea. Maybe he likes you.”

  “Theo? You’re on a first-name basis with the esteemed doctor? Maybe you’re the one he likes.”

  “Okay, I’m going to step in here.” Theo walked to the end of her bed and pointed to Flynn. “You, stop riling her up.” Then to Harper. “You, lie down and relax, or you’re going to be in here longer than a couple days.” Ben had stopped playing and was currently standing by Theo’s feet, watching the doctor scold Harper and his father. Theo looked down at the small human and shrugged. “Adults, am I right?”

  “No respect!”

  Harper snorted at that while Flynn groaned. He rolled his eyes, the motion landing his gaze on the doctor. The smile he turned toward Theo was beatific. Maybe that’s why Flynn denied it quickly, Harper thought. He was probably gay. Which explained the whole mother-only-being-in-the-picture-for-the-birth thing and why Harper was comfortable around him. Yup. Definitely gay. She intended to huff and tell them to take their flirtations to another room, but Flynn stopped her in her tracks.

  Flynn stretched across the hospital bedding and clasped her hand where it lay fisted and tense. He looked down at the hand and worked to tug her fingers open. She childishly fought him for a second, but he was only satisfied when her fingers expanded and intertwined with his. Connection sizzled through her, as if the simple touch put their bodies in sync. Feeling the smooth texture of his skin, the ridges of his fingerprints, trip along hers settled her irrational anger. The connection felt right, as though this was where they were supposed to be in relation to one another. They simultaneously turned to look up at Theo.

  Harper’s pulse pounded in tune with the ache in her head. The moment was too strong and bizarre, and she didn’t understand what Flynn was trying to accomplish. Or maybe she did, and it was too much for her bruised heart to take. He was the artist here, tugging and guiding them, molding them into a shape more to his liking.

  “I would like to thank you, Theo, for taking care of our fearless Harper.” Flynn sounded cool, like the world hadn’t decided to spin the other way. “She does a lot for others and rarely gets any thanks in return.” Theo opened his mouth to speak, and Flynn cut him off by reaching out to grasp his hand. “Don’t say you were only doing your job. I spoke to a nurse. She said your shift ended hours ago.”

  Flynn pulled the doctor toward them, gently pushing him to take a seat in the chair beside the bed. Ben interrupted to wiggle his way between the three of them and climb onto the doctor’s lap, completely at ease with the stranger and unaware of the tension between the trio. Theo didn’t question it but wrapped his free arm around the little boy to steady him.

  Flynn grinned smugly at the gesture. “I’d like to take you both to dinner, once Harper is better—”

  “And things at the kitchen are squared away,” she said. As exciting as this exchange was, the kitchen was her first priority.

  “No,” Flynn disagreed with a hard look at her. “You’ll become enmeshed in the Full Spoon, and then we’ll never see you again.”

  She stared right back at him, refusing to back down. “You’re right, because that place is my life. I worked my ass off for it, and I’m not going to let it fail because some asswipe decided to take advantage of the back door to the building being left open.”

  Flynn gentled his tone. “All I’m saying is that you go back and you work during the day like we do, and then you come out to dinner with us. That’s all.” Flynn squeezed her hand. “I would never presume to come between you and the kitchen. I’m not a blockhead.”

  Her shoulders dropped, and she realized her back had been tense. Her defenses rose in such a familiar knee-jerk reaction, she hadn’t noticed. “Okay,” she said more to herself than the men. “I’d like to get to know you both better.” She turned her gaze to Theo, who had been watching silently with an amused expression. “Especially you, Dr. Backstrom. Please let us pay you back for all you’ve done for me.”

  “Call me Theo,” he said, and that was as good an answer as any.

  “Daddy, I’m hungry.”

  Harper looked over to see Ben snuggled into Theo’s chest, his gaze drooping and his mouth surrounding the yellow toy as he gnawed on it. Theo tugged the toy out of his mouth, and the boy didn’t complain. He nuzzled deeper into Theo’s arms.

  “I can get him something from the cafeteria,” Theo offered.

  Flynn cleared his throat, a constricted noise that brought Harper’s gaze back to him. His mouth was tight as he stared at the large man cuddling with his child, and Harper suddenly understood a little more about the handsome volunteer who hadn’t told her about his delightful son. Seeing Ben take to a man Flynn was clearly attracted to must have been a punch to the gut, especially after raising the kid on his own. Harper wondered if Flynn had ever dated or tried to marry after Ben came into his life. What did he say before…that Ben’s grandfather hadn’t been able to watch him? At least he did have someone in his life to help out with the kid. That was a small blessing.

  “All right, monkey.” Flynn released Harper’s hand, then opened his arms for Theo to return Ben to him. Ben adjusted to the exchange but had no complaints being back in his daddy’s arms. Flynn stood, and Theo helped put the bag over Flynn’s shoulder, attempting to keep Ben undisturbed as the little one began to sleep. Flynn cradled Ben’s cheek as he leaned over to place a gentle kiss on Harper’s forehead.

  “Heal up, Harper. Call me when you’re gonna go back to the kitchen. I’ll see if I can meet you there to help with cleanup.”

  Harper could feel the imprint of Flynn’s lips on her skin, and it burned like a brand. She nodded slowly in agreement, too dazed for words. During their exchange, Theo had written something down on a piece of paper and was now tucking it into a side zipper on Flynn’s bag.

  “Call me, too,” Theo said, a hesitant smile on his full lips. “I’d like to see this kitchen.”

  “It’s a date.” Flynn winked playfully at Theo, the heaviness of the past few moments subsiding at last, letting Harper breathe easier. As soon as Flynn was out of the room, Harper leaned back against her pillows and stared up at Theo’s back, as he was curr
ently facing the doorway.

  “You all right?” Harper asked.

  “I don’t know,” he said honestly, turning back to Harper and sitting at her bedside. “That was unusual for me.”

  “Oh, well, I get propositioned like that all the time. Two guys at once is my forte. Stick with me, kid, and I’ll show you the ropes.”

  Theo laughed at her sarcasm, his chuckle tingling her senses, making her smile. She sobered, though, when his expression turned inward. “Are you all right?”

  “I’m not gay,” he said bluntly, his eyes open. “But I can’t imagine how I would feel if I never saw either of you again.” He grasped her hand. “This is…” He shrugged, words failing him.

  “Unusual.” She used his word from before.

  “Shouldn’t I be more appalled or stunned that a man I’m attracted to came on to me while coming on to another woman that I am equally attracted to? Especially when I have never been with a man?”

  “You’re laying it all out there, aren’t you?” Harper was impressed by his brutal honesty.

  “I feel, at this point, what do I have to hide?” He was open, bare and raw from what had occurred between the three of them. Harper didn’t think Flynn had done any damage in expressing his desire clearly, but there was something out of character about Theo’s submission. He didn’t seem like a person to give in, but she didn’t know him well enough to figure out the exact problem. She needed to learn him better. At any rate, it would keep until she was out of the hospital.

  “Is this how you treat all your patients, Dr. Backstrom?”

  The teasing seemed to wake him up from whatever thoughts had dragged him down. “Yes, my bedside manner is thirty percent medical knowledge and seventy percent gigolo.”