Katie's Forever Promise

by Jerry S. Eicher

  “Are you able to forgive Norman?” Mamm asked, holding Katie’s hand again. “And Mabel? Even though you think she had no great hand in this, I know she’s caused trouble before.”

  Katie nodded. “I think so.” She forced herself to pray. “I’m sorry, dear Hah for anything I’ve done wrong. I forgive Norman and Mabel for what I think they did wrong. Please heal this hurting heart of mine because I don’t know what I can do about it.”

  Katie and Mamm stood. Mamm turned and gave Katie another tight hug. “Are you okay now?”

  “Maybe.” Katie managed a slight smile. “Thank you for praying with me.”

  Mamm followed Katie to the bottom of the stairs. “You have a gut night’s sleep now.”

  “I’ll try,” Katie whispered before turning and slipping up the stairs. And she would—as hard as that might be. She would trust Da Hah to make sense and good come out of this mess. She certainly couldn’t.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Two Sunday nights after the breakup between Norman and Katie, Willis drove Sparky home from the Sunday night hymn singing, Katie seated beside him. She wanted to stay home or crawl into a hole somewhere, but when Willis offered to go with her, she’d accepted.

  She also knew Norman left the hymn singing right behind them. With Mabel at his side. Somehow Mabel had contrived a way to get Norman to ask her home. How had the girl managed that feat? Katie wondered. Now Mabel would have to deal with Norman’s temper and other eccentricities.

  “It’ll get better after awhile.” Willis’s voice oozed compassion. “And, besides, you didn’t really want him anyway.”

  “I thought he was Da Hah’s choice for me. I was going to marry Norman—if he asked. And Mabel knew it. Now she’s riding in his buggy.”

  Willis was quick to reply. “Sometimes things don’t work out—and that’s not always for the worst.”

  Katie shot a quick glance at Willis. “You don’t seem to carry a very high opinion of Norman.”

  Willis laughed. “Norman’s okay, I guess. He just never seemed to fit you very well.”

  “Maybe you’re right.” Katie let out another long sigh. “How did Mabel do it? That’s what I want to know. It took forever before he asked me.”

  “Well, Mabel’s my sister, so don’t spread this around…” Willis chuckled before continuing. “From what a little birdie told me, Ruth Troyer told Norman’s mamm what a great match Mabel would make for the grief-stricken Norman. I’m guessing Mabel put Ruth up to it. I’m sure you can guess the rest from there.”

  “I hope Mabel likes what she gets.” Katie turned around in the seat to look at the buggy lights behind them. Yah, from the gait of the horse, it was Norman and Mabel. Katie sighed. Would Mabel dare hold Norman’s hand on their first date? Even if she didn’t, Mabel wasn’t such a saint herself. The girl had spent plenty of time getting experience by kissing Mose Yutzy out in the feed bin when she was sneaking around. Katie rebuked herself. She shouldn’t be thinking such nasty thoughts about Mabel or Norman—or anyone else. She was even a bit ashamed of the smile that came to her face when she thought of how the two schemers deserved each other.

  “I think Mabel’s got herself a deal this time.” Willis was also watching the buggy lights behind them via his rearview mirror. “Norman’s going to be serious about getting married, considering how you broke his heart. It might help him save face to do it quickly.”

  Katie snorted. “I’m the one who should be talking about a broken heart.”

  Willis didn’t laugh. “Do you know what Norman’s spreading around the community? I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but I want you to be aware of what’s going on.”

  Katie sighed. “Yah, I know. Norman says I’m sneaky, that I stretch the truth, that I betray hearts, and that I have a hard time keeping decent thoughts in my head about guys.”

  “Whoa, Sparky!” Willis stopped the buggy at a stop sign and turned to stare at Katie. “Have you heard all that already?”

  Katie sighed. “No, but I used to date Norman, remember? I know how he thinks. I also know Mabel and what she told him about me—most of it untrue. And I know what both of them are capable of. Norman is saying such things, isn’t he?”

  “Yah.” Willis didn’t look at her.

  “Willis, I hope someday you have better success with love than I do,” Katie said.

  Willis touched her arm. “It’ll get better. Tonight’s the worst, Katie. Just remember that.”

  Willis clucked to Sparky, and the buggy lurched forward. “There will be someone out there for you, Katie. I know it. Someone who doesn’t sell drugs or dump you because you do what you think is right.”

  Katie snorted again. “The chances are getting slimmer, that’s all I can say. And worse than that, can you imagine who’s going to ask me home? What with the reputation I now have?”

  “Like I say, it’ll get better.”

  Willis was trying to comfort her, but it wasn’t working. She still felt quite low—and not without reason. The evening ahead of her with Mabel and Norman spending time together downstairs wouldn’t be easy.

  “I’m finished, Willis.” Katie moaned. “Finished with love and everything else.”

  Willis touched her arm again, his voice comforting. “When the heart hurts, it often says things it doesn’t mean. You’ll feel better tomorrow. You still have your teaching job, and the children love you. And so do we—your family—even Mabel, I think.”

  “You are the sweetest thing, Willis. Did anyone ever tell you that?”

  Willis laughed. “Nee, but thanks. Now, if a certain someone would just see things that way, my life would be nice.”

  “Oh!” Katie cooed. “Have you asked her home yet?”

  Willis’s face fell. “Yah, and she turned me down.”

  Katie sat up straight. “Tell me who it was, and I’ll speak with her. I’ll tell this girl what an awful mistake she’s making.”

  Willis laughed again. “You’ll do nothing of the sort. She’ll come around. And if she doesn’t, then it wasn’t meant to be.”

  “Stop being such a saint,” Katie told him. “I want to weep and howl and go to bed in sackcloth and ashes tonight. Instead I’ll have to deal with those two lovebirds sitting on the porch swing or in the living room. Do you think I could make a wild dash for the upstairs and get out of sight before they see me?”

  “Nee. I think you’d be better off speaking to them.” Willis pulled into the driveway and stopped beside the barn. “It won’t get any easier, and the problem has to be faced sometime—especially if Mabel has designs on marrying Norman. And you can depend on it that she does. A gut start tonight between the two of you would go a long way to smoothing things over. I know it will be hard, but try, Katie. For the rest of the family, if nothing else.”

  Katie caught her breath. “Is this why you offered to drive me tonight, Willis? To help smooth things over for the family?”

  Willis smiled as he climbed out of the buggy. “Nee, Katie. I came because of you. But it will be for the best—even for your own sake—if you accept this situation graciously.”

  Katie opened the buggy door. “Then I will do what I can. And thanks for driving home with me, Willis. You’re a real gentleman. Tell me something else quickly though. Do you have suggestions for a storybook I could read to the children at school?”

  “That’s a sudden change of subject,” Willis said, as he unfastened the tug on his side of the buggy. “But, in fact, I do. I’ll get it for you tomorrow morning.”

  “Thanks!” Katie climbed down and they finished unhitching in silence. Willis vanished into the barn with Sparky in tow. Waiting beside the buggy, Katie forced a smile when Norman and Mabel drove in. Norman pulled up to the hitching post and climbed out to secure Bonnie. Without a glance in Katie’s direction, he marched toward the house with Mabel beside him.

  Katie was sobbing into her hands when Willis returned.

  “Will you be all right?” Willis asked as he shifted on his feet in f
ront of her.

  “Yah, I think so. I’m ready to go inside. It’s just hard, that’s all.”

  The two walked across the lawn and entered through the washroom door. Katie splashed cold water on her face, but her eyes still looked red and teary. Willis waited until she shooed him on. “Go in. I’ll come in a minute.” Katie soon heard Willis’s cheerful voice coming from the living room. Whatever his comment, it was followed by laughs. Willis was trying hard to keep everyone happy tonight. And she would have to play her part for the good of them all.

  The sound of Willis closing the stair door soon came, and with her head held high, Katie stepped into the living room. Norman glanced up and just as quickly looked down at the floor again. Mabel, though, had a smile on her face as she stared at Katie. “There you are. I was wondering where you’d gotten to. Willis just went past. Was that you standing beside the buggy when we pulled in?”

  Katie pasted on her best smile. Mabel knew where she’d been. She wasn’t blind. But bringing up that fact wasn’t going to help. She managed to keep her voice friendly. “Yah, that was me. Waiting on Willis to come back from the barn.”

  “Willis was so nice tonight,” Mabel cooed. “Bringing you home. I couldn’t ask for a better brother.”

  “He was a real gentlemen,” Katie agreed and headed toward the stair door. She’d done her duty and was getting out of there.

  Mabel though wasn’t finished. “Katie, please, let’s not fight on this my special night. Can’t you see that things are so much better this way?”

  “I’m glad you think so,” Katie said, not turning around. They had been over this last week after Mabel announced that Norman was bringing her home. Why rehash it now? Likely for Norman’s benefit.

  “I really hope there are no hard feelings, Katie.” Mabel’s voice oozed like honey. “Norman and I were talking on the way home, and he sees it now himself. I don’t know how we both could have been so blind. Me…blending in so well on that first night when Norman brought you home. Don’t you remember, Katie? How it went with the ice cream and cherry pie? It was already Da Hah showing us what really ought to happen. Aren’t you glad everyone listened before it was too late?”

  The girl had more gall than seven foxes in a henhouse. Katie turned around. “Norman, do you agree with this…this version of events?”

  “Of course he does,” Mabel chirped.

  Katie waited. If Norman were going to marry into the family, he might as well face her on the first night. “I’d like to hear him say it.”

  “It was for the best.” Norman finally looked up, meeting her gaze. “Things weren’t working out between us, Katie. You know that.”

  “Then I hope there will be no more false words spoken around the community about me from either one of you.” Katie knew her temper was rising, but this needed saying. “I apologize for anything I did wrong during our brief courtship, Norman. And I hope you can forgive and leave things at that.”

  “Of course he can,” Mabel said. She turned to Norman with a smile. “You certainly can, can’t you, Norman?”

  “I can.” He managed a few more seconds of eye contact with Katie before he looked down at the floor.

  “Then I will hold no hard feelings.” Katie turned toward the stair door.

  “Oh, this is so sweet,” Mabel cooed behind her as Katie left. She’d noticed that Mabel wasn’t sitting too close to Norman. She must have figured that out already. The man had more problems than a person could shake a stick at, Katie thought. In a way she should be happy she wasn’t sitting on the couch with him. But it still stung—being thrown aside like a used rag. Twice that had happened now, though for different reasons. Was there something wrong with her? Something deep inside that she couldn’t see? Why else would Ben so easily despise their relationship, risking it on such an evil thing as drug dealing? And now Norman. He had his reasons, which were simple enough to understand. She wasn’t gut enough for his high standards.

  Katie flopped down on the bed and lay there for a long time. Tears wouldn’t even come anymore. They were all dried up inside her. How could she ever trust her feelings again? First, she’d loved Ben, and look what came of that. Then, she’d hoped to love Norman as Mamm had come to love Jesse. What was so wrong with her that she couldn’t find happiness with someone? Was Da Hah punishing her? If so, for what sin?

  If she was so awful, should she just flee and find solace in her friendships with the Mennonite youth group again? Nee, that wouldn’t work this time. She was a church member now. And so much had changed even with Margaret and Sharon. Sharon was dating now, and Margaret’s wedding was coming up soon. Maybe the wedding would cheer her up…give her hope for herself—if she wasn’t so far gone as to be beyond hope.

  Katie groaned and slid down on her knees. “Dear Hah, help me or I’m going to go mad—if I haven’t already.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Ben eased himself up on his elbows to glance out the front-room window. It was Saturday afternoon, some three weeks after his setback with the infection. The buggy that had just driven into his parents’ driveway looked familiar. Moments later Deacon Elmer climbed out of one side and Bishop Miller out of the other. Ben sighed. He’d been expecting something like this. Both the deacon and the bishop arriving together meant something serious was going on.

  Obviously he was causing great concern for the community with his recent incarceration and now the shooting. If he were a member of the church, the bann would be used on him for sure. But since he wasn’t a member, there was little that could be done. And yet both men were here so they had something up their sleeves.

  Mamm stuck her head out of the kitchen. “Who is it, Ben?”

  “The deacon and the bishop.”

  Mamm gasped as she rushed to the window. “I didn’t expect this. I wonder if Leon heard anything about what might be going on.”

  “I’m sure Daett would have told me if he knew,” Ben responded. And his daett would have, if nothing else but to lecture him on how he ought to conduct himself for this visit. Instructions Ben already knew. “Act humble and don’t talk back.” He’d been told that dozens of times in his life, but Daett still repeated the words whenever he knew the ministers were involved.

  “Ach, the house is in a total mess.” Mamm wiped her hands on her apron and rushed back into the kitchen.

  That was the least of Ben’s concerns right now, he figured. The ministers wouldn’t even notice the condition of the house. If Mamm fed them some of the blackberry pie she’d made this morning, sliding ample pieces onto plates, the two wouldn’t see a speck of dirt. Mamm no doubt knew this and was preparing the plates even now. Ben couldn’t stop a smile from flitting briefly across his face at the thought. Then he frowned again. The ministers probably wanted to make sure he didn’t testify against the shooter the police had captured. The detectives had been by again just yesterday, urging his full cooperation in the upcoming trial. With his recent illness, his mind was still foggy but he’d told them he wouldn’t be testifying. That much he knew. But they still made their points in favor of him testifying: another criminal would be placed behind bars, his family would be safe, and Ben could rest easier knowing he was doing what was right. Those were their Englisha arguments, anyway.

  But Ben had shaken his head. “We Amish believe in turning the other cheek and practicing forgiveness.”

  “But what about justice?” they’d asked. “Forgiveness isn’t all that’s necessary for people to live peacefully with each other. And you’ve testified in court before.”

  Ben knew the answer to that point, even if he hadn’t told the detectives. True believers risked all in the hopes of touching the heart of the transgressor, even as Christ had given all to reach lost and dying sinners. This time Ben was staying with the beliefs of his people. He would not testify. He realized this was taking the hard road. The easiest decision would be to go along with what the detectives wanted. He had a place of shelter at his grandparents’ place. In fact, he’d alre
ady be there if it hadn’t been for his setback. His family would be out of danger. That someone outside the community would trace him to his grandparents’ place was a possibility, but not a large one. But he couldn’t testify, even in the face of the police’s disappointment.

  Mamm interrupted his thoughts by rushing out of the kitchen again and heading for the doorway. He’d been watching the bobbing black hats draw closer to the house and now Mamm opened the door and stepped out on the porch. Ben listened to the low murmur of voices as she spoke with the ministers. Soon Daett’s voice joined in, and Mamm opened the door again. Ben sat up straight on the couch, as the two ministers followed Mamm inside, holding their hats in their hands.

  They nodded. “Gut afternoon, Ben.”

  “Gut afternoon.” Ben tried to sit up even straighter, but the discomfort was too much.

  Mamm set up chairs, and when the men were seated facing Ben, she vanished into the kitchen again. Daett sat near the window waiting, his gaze turned toward the floor. Whatever the ministers had told him outside must be a heavy load to bear, Ben figured. He turned toward Deacon Elmer when the deacon cleared his throat. “Are you getting along okay, Ben? With the latest…setback? We heard it was pretty serious.”

  Ben shrugged. “I’m still on antibiotics, but the doctors think the worst is past.”

  “We missed you at church on Sunday again,” Bishop Miller said, his eyes kind but sorrow hung behind them.

  Ben wished they’d just come out and say what they’d come to say. But there would be no hurrying these two. “Thank you.” Ben smiled back. “I miss attending church.”

  Bishop Miller didn’t answer as Mamm came out of the kitchen carrying two plates holding huge slices of blackberry pie. “I know you two have to be hungry. And I had fresh pie from this morning just sitting right out there on the table.”

  Both ministers smiled and leaned back in their chairs.