Recipe for Desire

by Hodges, Cheris

  She didn’t know if she should’ve followed him or not. Instead, she headed inside the restaurant and ran for the office. Devon needed his friends; specifically, he needed Kandace.

  “Alicia,” Marie said breathlessly from the doorway. “Do you know where Kandace is?”

  Alicia looked up from the computer, surprised to see Marie standing there. “I haven’t seen her since earlier. What’s going on?”

  Marie closed the door behind her and sighed. “I think Devon needs her.” Despite the fact that Marie wanted to be the one who calmed her man down, she knew Kandace had a deeper understanding of Devon’s relationship with his father.

  “Why? What’s going on?” Alicia asked.

  “Devon’s having a tough time and I just don’t know how to help him. I’m guessing Kandace does because she’s dealt with his father before.”

  Alicia nodded. “That man just doesn’t quit.”

  “His father called me and said he’s doing a fund-raiser in memory of Devon’s mother. So, you can imagine how that went over.”

  Alicia’s mouth dropped and she snatched the phone off the hook. “I’ll call Kandace.”

  Devon hadn’t realized how far he’d walked until he passed Wendy’s. It was really ironic that he ended up there since this had been the only fast-food restaurant that his mother would allow them to dine at during their adventures. Smiling, he started to go in and order a single with cheese, mustard, and extra pickles, his mother’s favorite sandwich. Instead, he grabbed his cell phone and called his father.

  “Son, I’m surprised to hear from you,” Devon Sr. said when he answered the phone.

  “That’s a damned lie and we both know it. Why did you call Marie?”

  “I want this war between us to end, Son. I want us to try and put the past behind us. That’s why I’m honoring your mother.”

  “That’s a damned joke. You honoring the woman you abused for years, right. You’d better call it off or I will tell the world what a louse their hero is. I will tell them why I spent the last decade avoiding you and everything you stand for.”

  “You don’t want to do that. There’s no need to air our family business.”

  “I’ve tried to handle this by just ignoring you. Obviously, you can’t take a hint.”

  “Is this about your mother or the fact that you blame me because you couldn’t keep it in your pants and that girl caught you? Get over it, Junior. She certainly has.”

  “You’re a pathetic, lonely old man and I actually feel sorry for you. You know what, I’m not wasting my time on you anymore. When your judgment day comes, you’re going to have to answer for everything you’ve ever done,” he said, quoting his mother. He actually heard his father gasp. Devon couldn’t remember how many times he’d heard his mother say those exact words to his father. Knowing that he couldn’t do anything to make his father see the errors of the past, Devon felt peace wash over him. His mother wouldn’t want him to spend another day angry with his father. He finally understood her last words to him. Baby, you can only control what is in your soul.

  “I hope your fund-raiser is successful and you find the forgiveness that you’re seeking before you meet your end,” he said, then hung up the phone.

  As he walked back to the restaurant, his phone rang again. Though he started to ignore the call, thinking it was his father, Devon pulled the phone from his pocket. “Kandace?” he questioned when he answered.

  “Where are you?” she asked.

  “Heading to the restaurant. What’s up?”

  “Are you all right?”

  Devon laughed, knowing Marie had told his friends what happened. That was sweet and a bit annoying. “Everything is cool, and why did Marie have you call me?”

  “Because that girl loves you and wants to keep you on this side of sanity. You’re really going to have to open up to her. It takes a lot for a woman to ask a man’s ex for help.”

  “Kandace,” Devon said, “I’m good. I’m going to go to Marie and let her know that.”

  “Are you sure? She told me and Alicia what your father had planned and how ...”

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he said. “I was pissed, ready to smash his face in and tell the world what kind of man he is. But as I walked, I felt the presence of my mother, and I really let it all go. I can’t keep this anger inside me and I released it today.”

  “Please let Marie know that. And whatever you do, don’t mess things up with this woman,” Kandace said. “You need her.”

  “It’s not often that a man can find the right woman once, but to have it happen a second time, I know what to do not to mess it up.”

  “Umm, that’s great. I have to go, I think my water just broke,” she said, then the line went silent. Devon jogged to the restaurant to share the news of Kandace’s labor.

  Waiting for Devon to return was driving Marie crazy. Where did he go? Was he all right? Maybe she should’ve followed him because she knew how upset he was.

  “Marie,” Alicia said as she watched her pace back and forth. “You’re going to walk a hole in the floor.”

  She stopped and cast a sheepish glance at Alicia. “Sorry. I’m just worried about him. What if Kandace wasn’t able to calm him down? You didn’t see him; he was so angry and I just can’t help but wonder if he ...”

  The door to the office swung open and Devon burst in. “Have you two heard from Kandace or Solomon?”

  “No,” Alicia replied. “Why?”

  “Are you all right?” Marie asked Devon as she crossed over to him. He nodded and placed his hand on her shoulder.

  “Kandace said her water broke,” he said.

  Alicia brought her hand to her mouth, and as she was about to call Jade and Serena, the office phone rang. Alicia grabbed the extension and Marie turned to Devon, whispering, “Are you all right?”

  “I’m fine,” he replied. “We need to talk about what you did.”

  “Look,” she began. “I was ...”

  “Guys,” Alicia called out. “Kandace is at Presbyterian Hospital. Jade and Serena are on the way.”

  “Let’s go,” Devon said.

  “I think I’m going to my office,” Marie said. Devon shook his head.

  “Come on, ride with me,” he said. “We can talk on the way to the hospital.”

  The last thing Marie wanted was to hear a lecture from Devon about calling Kandace, but what else was she supposed to do? He didn’t give her much of a choice with his silent anger. Rolling her eyes, Marie decided that she wasn’t going to let him make her feel bad about trying to protect him. She walked out to the car with him and noticed a slight change in his gait.

  “Devon,” she said. “Look, if you’re upset because I went to your friends and ...”

  He took her face in the palm of his hands. “I’m not upset. I owe you an apology,” he said. “I haven’t let you in and that’s not fair to you.”

  Marie blinked and sucked her bottom lip in. “OK.”

  “No, seriously. The last thing I wanted was to scare you or make you think that I was going to lose control. I’m done with my father, and if he’s truly going to ‘honor’ my mother, then I wish him the best. It’s the least he could do for the hell that he put her through. I can’t be angry with him anymore if I expect to truly experience love,” he said, then brushed his lips against hers. “And I don’t want you worrying about me when all we should be thinking about is what we have between us right now.”

  Marie tilted her head and kissed him again, slipping her tongue between his lips as if she was showing him how relieved she was that he’d calmed down. Breaking the kiss, Devon stared into her eyes and nodded. “We’d better get going,” he said.

  “OK,” she replied with a smile. When Marie and Devon arrived at the hospital, Jade, Alicia, Serena, and Antonio were there in the lobby of the maternity ward. “How is she?” Devon asked.

  “We don’t know yet,” Jade said. “Solomon said there was a complication.”

  “Oh, no,” Devon
said. Marie gripped his hand, noting the pained look on his face.

  Serena held on to Antonio tightly as her eyes misted with tears. “She has to be all right,” she whispered.

  “She will be,” Antonio said comfortingly. “She’s a fighter, just like the rest of you ladies, and she isn’t going to leave that baby without a mother.”

  About an hour later, Solomon walked into the lobby and smiled at his friends. Jade and Devon leapt to their feet. “How is she?” they asked in concert.

  “My wife and my daughter are just fine. I’m guessing this is the first of many near heart attacks I have to look forward to,” he said as he leaned against the wall and sighed.

  “So, what happened?” Serena asked.

  Solomon released a breath and started telling the story. “The baby was breach. The doctor thought she would turn, but as Kandace continued to dilate, the baby didn’t move an inch. Then she went into distress because the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. Kandace’s blood pressure dropped. It was scary for a while. All of the machines were going crazy and I was standing there about to pass out.”

  Devon held Marie closer to him, Antonio stroked Serena’s shoulder, and Jade and Alicia squeezed each other’s hands as Solomon continued his story.

  “I told the doctor he had to save them both, and he went on about how they couldn’t do the emergency C-section if Kandace didn’t stabilize, and I thought my life was going to end right there. But she did stabilize and the rest is, as they say, history.”

  Jade, Alicia, and Serena surrounded Solomon and enveloped him in a tight hug as they cried tears of relief and joy. As Marie watched them, she felt out of place, as if she was intruding on a private moment.

  “I’m going to get everyone some tea,” she told Devon. He nodded and did everything but shove her down the hall—at least in Marie’s mind.

  She slowly wandered down the corridor, wondering if she was being too sensitive to what she thought was a random dismissal. After all, the woman had been his first love, and she was married to another man and just gave birth to his child. And she nearly died. Of course Devon is going to be concerned about her. This isn’t William; it’s not as if you’re going to walk in someplace and find them kissing.

  Marie didn’t do insecurities and these feelings were new. And if she was honest with herself, she knew she’d never felt this way about anyone else she’d ever dated because she had never been in love. Never put her heart into it because she was afraid to get hurt. Now she had fallen so deeply for Devon that she was afraid that such a love would lead to pain. But Devon wasn’t the type of man to play games, and he hadn’t given her a reason to feel this way. Her old sabotaging self seemed to be whispering in her ear as she walked into the cafeteria. Maybe I don’t deserve a man like Devon, she thought as she ordered tea for everyone and picked up some snacks just in case anyone wanted something to eat. When Marie returned to the waiting room, Jade and Alicia were gone. Devon told her they were visiting Kandace as he took the drinks and snacks from her hands. “You must’ve known that we were sitting here contemplating ordering some food.”

  “Well, I wanted to make sure everybody could have something they wanted,” she said. Devon kissed her.

  “Thank you, baby,” he said as he grabbed a granola bar. Antonio and Serena thanked Marie as they took tea and two bags of chips. Marie started to ask Devon if he thought she should be there, since she was much like an outsider to the crew, but Jade and Alicia walked over to them.

  “She is a beautiful little girl and Solomon is already so protective of her,” Jade said.

  “What did they name her?” Serena asked.

  “Kiana Danielle,” Alicia said and the three women laughed.

  “What’s so funny?” Antonio asked, then took a sip of tea.

  “Nothing, except she’s been carrying that name around since ...” Serena stopped and glanced at Marie and Devon. “It’s an old name we came up with in the AUC.”

  Marie grabbed her cup of tea and took a big gulp so that she wouldn’t say something inappropriate. “They took the baby back to the nursery; Solomon said he’d come and escort us over there to see her,” Jade said.

  “You can wait for Solomon,” Serena said. “I’m going to see my goddaughter now.”

  As she walked down the hall, Alicia turned to Jade and shook her head. “You see how she just automatically assumes she’s the godmother,” she said, then laughed.

  Devon noticed how quiet Marie was and sat down beside her on the bench where she was sending e-mails from her BlackBerry.

  “Hey, you,” he said. “I guess all this motherhood stuff isn’t your scene, huh?”

  “I thought it wasn’t your scene,” she shot back. Marie shook her head. “I’m sorry, I guess I need a nap. I just feel like you guys have a life and a connection that I will never be a part of. I mean, you’re almost leaping for joy that Kandace had a baby, but the one time we had sex without a condom, you nearly jumped out of your skin at the prospect that I could be carrying your child.”

  “Really? You want to do this here?” Devon asked, taken aback by Marie’s attitude.

  “No, I don’t. As a matter of fact, let me go and leave you with your friends. Enjoy the tea and the snacks.” She leapt to her feet and stormed to the elevator. When she felt a hand on her arm, she was honestly surprised that Devon had followed her.

  “First of all, I don’t know where this is coming from,” he said in a whisper. “Obviously, you knew what kind of friendship Kandace and I had or you wouldn’t have reached out to her earlier today. Secondly, her baby has nothing to do with me. Am I happy for her? Yes. But I’m not going to be the one responsible for raising that child. That’s her and her husband’s job. So, what is really going on with you?”

  Marie couldn’t answer the question. Because she was afraid that her answer wouldn’t make sense at all. She was jealous, plain and simple, and she knew she had no reason to be. Devon was right; she had reached out to Kandace when she thought he was in trouble.

  “Why don’t you just go back to your friends,” she said. “I need to go and talk to Adriana about some business and I don’t need to be hanging around here.” She jabbed the button for the elevator, and Devon shook his head. But he didn’t try to stop her, recognizing that whatever she was fighting with in her head, he couldn’t do anything to help her until she calmed down.

  Chapter 22

  Two days after their disagreement at the hospital, Devon still couldn’t figure out why Marie had gotten so upset. But he had grown tired of her avoiding him and not answering his calls. She had adjusted her schedule at the shelter to get there after his class was finished. After he finished his preparation work at the restaurant, he headed to Marie’s office to put an end to the madness. Either they were going to work things out or it was time to stop wasting time.

  Who am I kidding? I’m not letting her go, and if I have to lock her in this office until we get things right, then that’s just what I’m going to do, he thought as he hopped into his car. Driving to her office, all he could think about was how empty he’d felt these past few days. As he pulled up to a stoplight, his cell phone rang, jarring his mind away from Marie.

  “Yeah?” he said when he answered.

  “Devon, this is Amélie Michel from Paris Dining,” she said. “Bonjour.”

  “Bonjour,” he said.

  “It’s been a while since we’ve spoken about the show,” Amélie said. “Today, I’m able to make you a formal offer. The host of our show has decided that he wants to focus on running his restaurant and no one wants to see this show end.”

  “Wow,” he said. Since Devon and Marie had gotten serious, he hadn’t given Paris a second thought.

  “You say that as if Paris is no longer an option for you,” she said, her voice tensing.

  “Honestly, Amélie, I haven’t thought about it in a while.”

  “Mais non, Devon. You’re the only chef I know who can pull this show off. You have a followi
ng in Paris because of the gâteau d’amoureux. One cake. You have to do this. How much will it take to get you here?”

  “It’s not the money,” he said.

  “I understand that you’re working with a restaurant in North Carolina, but I will buy out your contract and pay any penalties. You made your mark here. Do you know how many students have a dessert being sold in Le Bouquet des Archives? Of course, you’re not a student anymore, and your talent has become world renowned.”

  Devon laughed underneath her compliments. “I don’t know if I’d go that far. When would you need my decision?” he asked as he turned into the parking lot of Marie’s office building.

  “Well, we don’t start the show for another ten months, but if you’re going to take over the restaurant, change the menu, and remake our dessert offerings, then I’d like to have you here in the next six months.”

  “I have a lot of things I have to tie up here,” he said, thinking about the upcoming fund-raiser, his work at the shelter, and Marie. Looking up at the office building, he thought about turning the offer down. But Paris was his absolute favorite city, and he had considered going back there. Would Marie come with him? This would be a chance for him to start over and put distance between him and his father. He couldn’t start a new life if Marie wasn’t a part of it, though.

  “Well,” she said, “I wish I could say that you had all the time in the world, but I’m going to need an answer in a month.”

  “All right,” he said. “I will get back to you.”

  “Au revoir,” she said.

  After hanging up the phone, Devon sighed, wondering if he should take the next step to further his career or if he should fight for the love of his woman. The woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. The woman he wanted to stand beside while she gave birth to his son. The woman who made him dream of chocolate and think of nothing but tasting it all over her body.

  Was he ready to give up his dream for Marie?