LUST : Book One of the Biker's Seven Deadly Sins

by Simone Elise

  I killed the engine of the car and turn to her. “Ivory, about tonight.”

  Her eyes flash to mine. “You don’t want to let me fully in and I get that.” Her words aren’t harsh. “I just guess it doesn’t go both ways. I let you in.” She pops open the door. “That was my mistake.” Is what she says before she gets out of the car, leaving me to feel like a real dick. My father once said to me that when you start feeling you step away from the club, perhaps my time as a member was coming to its natural end.

  Then again, how can I even consider walking from the club, when I can’t even say I love you to Ivory.

  53

  Ivory

  Slipping my jeans off I walk into mine and Kace’s wardrobe and grab a large shirt. It’s been a long and an awakening night. I realize that Kace has two sides. I realize that I will never be good enough, or wanted by him—to know both sides. So when I strip out of my clothes. I’m trying not to think about what this means for our relationship.

  “I can’t do it.”

  I look up. Kace is standing there. With this expression that sends my heart into spins.

  “I can’t let you know that man.” He explains. “I…” he pauses and my heart stops because he is going to say it. Is he going to say the words… the I love you Ivory…. “I care for you a lot Ivory and you won’t feel a thing for me, if you know that side of me.”

  Care. He cares for me.

  I scoff and shake my head. “Okay. That’s your decision.” And I don’t fight him on it. I don’t point out that I’m the woman that would stand by him in the dark and the light. Even though I had told him that. “You have picked to keep me from that side of you. I didn’t.” I look him dead in the eyes and he realizes what I’m getting at and opens his mouth.

  He realizes his mistake. But it’s a second too late.

  My phone rings and I just picked it up. I answer it before he tells me not to. “Hello?” I say softly into the phone. I’m hurting and it is heard clear in my tone.

  Kace looks at me, like he wants me off the phone. But I’m interested in who is calling me at two in the morning.

  “Dad had a stroke.” Lincoln says.

  I blink. “What?” The disbelief is heard clearly in my one word. “How… how bad?” I whisper in the phone.

  “You better come up Ivy.” Links breaks the news to me. And then hangs up. I just stare at my phone.

  “Everything okay?”

  “My dad…. My dad…” Words freeze. Everything freezes. My father was a man of strength. He didn’t do disability. He had a stroke. Links must know it’s bad because he told me to come up. Images flash through my head and Kace’s arms are around my waist.

  “Ivory what’s happened?”

  “I need to go to the hospital.” I push away from his arms.

  “I’ll take you.”

  “My family won’t want to see you.” Hell let’s be honest I can’t look at him at this very second. He cares for me… cares…. I blink and tears swell in my eyes. It doesn’t matter. My dad has had a stroke.

  “I don’t care. You’ve been drinking.” Kace still has the keys. “I’m taking you.” And just like a lot of things in our relationship. I didn’t get a say. But let’s face it, what relationship. The one where he keeps a side of himself away from me? Yeah. It was hitting me hard, knowing that.

  Waiting rooms. They should be known as torture cells. I keep tearing up and then grounding myself, and knowing Dad will pull through, makes the tears go back away. Kace hasn’t left. But Asher isn’t happy about it.

  But it got worse when Elle and Chopper arrived. Asher basically went from glaring at Kace to sharing the glare between Chopper and Kace.

  “Mine was on Thursday.” Links speaks and Elle, Asher and I look at him.

  “Mine was Tuesday.” I say.

  “Wednesday.” Asher says.

  “I didn’t take his calls.” Elle blinks and tears spread in her eyes. “I didn’t even listen to the voice messages.”

  I squeeze her thigh. And her hand goes over mine. Dad always met with us kids one on one once a month. It was normally a grilling on what we are doing wrong, but then he would always end it on a good note. Mine and his always ended with whiskey.

  “Fuck those monthly meetings.” Links sighs and runs a hand over his head.

  My mind went to my last conversation with him. It was about Kace and I buying a house. And the tears come this time and I can’t fight them.

  Kace’s hand is on my thigh, and I know he is right beside me but I don’t need him. He doesn’t have to be here.

  “Last month, he attacked my revenue mark.” Asher shares. “And I had a good month.”

  The door burst open and we all look. Only to see Gabe.

  “Any news?” he’s panicking like the rest of us.

  “No.” We all say together.

  “Where’s mom?”

  “With the staff. She’s a surgeon she won’t not be involved.” Links tells Gabe.

  Gabe nods his head and then sits down next to Asher. “I was booked in this week.” And we all sigh. And mutter same.

  The door then opens. And it’s mom. It’s not who she is with that matters. It’s the look in her eyes. It’s the death gripping silence that follows.

  The boys rush to her, while Elle and I remain seated and share a look. Dad wasn’t pulling through this.

  “He’s on life support. It gives each of you to say a chance goodbye.” Mom walks towards us girls. “Ivory, there is a man outside you need to talk to.”

  The boys look at me. And I’m a mess right now. “Who?” I shutter out and I want to know who is more important than me saying goodbye to my father.

  “He worked endlessly beside your father. Sadly he couldn’t save him.” Mom cups my cheek. “Your father said he would always come back.”

  I just blink, not understanding. But I glance at the boys and they all have this expression on their faces, like their worst nightmare is coming true. I guess it was in some ways because who would be stepping up running the companies when dad… I can’t finish that sentence.

  “He’s in the hall.” Mom adds, and I nod my head, getting up. Glancing at Kace, should he come? “Best to be on your own Ivy.” Mom says like she can read my thoughts. And I look at Kace.

  “I’ll be right back.” I look at him, but he’s looking at me like I won’t be.

  I step out into the hall and my eyes land on…. Taylor. He walks towards me. “Told you I would be back buttercup.” And the wave of emotion, of everything that is happening, hits me. Taylor is back from war. And he’s standing right in front of me.

  I don’t believe that I’m seeing him, until his arms wrap around me and I break.

  KACE

  “Want to explain who that is?” I look at Gabe who is glaring directly out the door at the man that I’m too glaring at.

  “Her ex boyfriend.” He tells me news I don’t want to hear. Then he looks at me sighing. “If it makes you feel any better, we hate him more than we hate you. Well us boys do. The parents loved him.”

  I swallow sharply. “Which one of them ended it?” I knew this would be the deciding key for if I was in trouble or not.

  “Neither.” Lincoln steps to my side, also glaring out the door. “He just went to war, didn’t really tell her goodbye. It broke my sister.”

  “And now he picks dad’s death to step back into the fucking picture.” Gabe says through gritted teeth. “Dad loved him more than he did us boys.”

  So that made the jealousy that these men were feeling towards the man currently hugging my girlfriend about equal to my own.

  “Ivory was like Elle, before he left. Then he left, and he broke her. I ended up getting her back on track with the nascar.” Gabe shares more important information about Ivory’s past. “She turned to cars and tracks to deal with the pain.”

  “So he doesn’t know her grease monkey side?”

  “No.” They say together, and both look at me.

  “But
he knows how to get into her head. He knocked her up at fifteen and she nearly kept it if it wasn’t for Links.” Gabe speaks first and I curse.

  “How the fuck am I going to compete with that!” I just say the words.

  “You do what you always do Ace.”

  And I glance over my shoulder seeing Chopper. “Fight dirty.” He says and then looks at Elle. “It’s what I’d do.”

  Fight dirty? Against a man that Ivory ‘broke’ over. Yeah. I doubt I had a chance, especially after what I said tonight before we came.

  Asher was the first one to tell his father goodbye, and I knew when it was Ivory’s turn. Who she turned to after it, would give me insight into what she was currently feeling. Me or him? Was the question.

  54

  Kace

  I was out having a smoke. Minding my own goddamn business, when the man who had taken it upon himself tonight, to support my girlfriend through losing her father stepped outside. He’s on the phone. And I pretend like he hasn’t gotten under my skin all night. Leaning against the brick wall, cigarette between my fingers.

  The sliding door opened and out stepped Gabe and Links.

  “Ivory alright?” Is my immediate question when I see them.

  “Yeah but my nerves are getting to the end, if I don’t have a smoke.” And Gabe then looks at me. I roll my eyes, and pull out my pack. He doesn’t say thank you, he just takes it.

  Taylor finishes up his phone call and I know is one of those arrogant bastards, that will have to say something before heading back inside. However Links spots him, and I see hatred in his eyes.

  Links approaches him. “Why the fuck you still here?”

  Gabe gives me a look. And I have a feeling that Links and Taylor have unfinished business.

  “Ivory’s moved on.” Links adds and I arched my eyebrows at that. Because Links didn’t accept me, but Gabe must be right, they hate Taylor more than me.

  Taylor smirks. “Come on Links, when are you going to let the past remain where it is?”

  “Maybe the same day I knock up your fifteen year old sister, and expect her to keep it. Only to leave her a year later. Do you ever think of what would have happened if I hadn’t made Ivory get rid of it?” Links fists are curled at his side.

  “Trust me Lincoln the fact you killed my unborn first child, doesn’t escape my mind.” Taylor is the one glaring at Links. And I know now while Ivory had an abortion, it was clear Taylor hadn’t wanted it. He leans in. “And it didn’t escape your father’s either. How did he take you killing his grandchild?”

  Links has him by the collar in a second and Gabe is pulling him off Taylor.

  Taylor’s eyes go off Links and on to me. “By the tattoos, rings and glare. I’m guessing you are the biker.” He shoves past Gabe and towards me. “You should know that, she’ll drop you the moment she says goodbye to her old man. Their last conversation was about you,” he tilts his head, “I should know because he called me.”

  “Mate,” and I push away from the brick wall. “you don’t want to threaten me.”

  “Because you are big bad biker?” He mocks.

  “No.” And I look him dead in the eyes. “Because I don’t stop until a body bag is involved.” I step towards him. “Come near my woman or touch my woman again, and you’ll see what I’m capable of.”

  “I can ruin you Kace Striking. One call and you’ll be in prison.”

  “One call by me, and you’ll be in an unmarked grave.” I throw back at him and smirk. And also notice Link’s grin. “For your own health, you’ll stay away from your high school sweetheart,” and I lean towards him. “because she’s got herself involved with a man that doesn’t follow your rules. So don’t test me.” I grit the last words out because my patience is wearing thin. My rage is slowly beginning to take over. My ability to see clearly, is starting to get blinded because this man was threatening to take away the reason I was breathing.

  The sliding door automatically opened, and Ivory is standing there, she is scanning the area, her eyes which are filled with tears, land on me. And it was like everyone else wasn’t even there, she just rushed straight to me, I’m opening my arms just in time, as she ran into my arms.

  I wrap my arms around her, as she broke down in my arms. And I knew she had just said goodbye to her father. And she turned to me not him. But as I look at him, while holding Ivory. I see a tint in his eyes, it isn’t jealousy, it’s rage—the type of rage I had been feeling moments ago but it calmed down immediately as Ivory stepped into my arms.

  She turned to me. Even after everything I said tonight. That meant something didn’t it?

  55

  Kace

  It was early morning by the time I get Ivory home. Her father’s death had been called, at five forty two this morning. She hadn’t left my arms since she found me out in front smoking. She basically glued herself to me and I didn’t mind. It was comforting for me, because having her glued to me, was taking my mind off the wanker that was still hovering. And keeping a blanket over my rage that was boiling underneath with him being near.

  Once I got her home, getting her to bed had been my number one concern. She had a hell of a night, and she was no longer fuelled by alcohol now. She had one hell of a headache when we got home, and I had just gotten her into bed.

  Stepping away from the bed, I undo my belt. My eyes locked on hers as she clenches her head with her hand. I know she isn’t going to get any relief until those pills, which I had forced her to take, kick in.

  Stripping off my clothes, I climb into bed, and pull her to my chest. Running a hand down her side, as she curls into me. This is the first time all night since she heard the news, she isn’t crying. Her fingers trace the gap in my chest tattoo and then she snuggles in closer to me. I hear her inhale sharply, calming down, and she continues to trace the gap in my chest piece.

  I have questions for her, but I know she’s in no state to answer them. So I continue to run my fingers over her back, hoping to take her mind off the pain of her headache.

  “Kace?” She murmurs and she sounds half asleep.

  “Yeah darling?”

  “I’m sorry.” She sighs into my chest.

  She has nothing to be sorry over. So I frown. “About?”

  She mumbled something into my chest but I don’t catch it and I know she is about to pass out. So I don’t push it. We can talk this afternoon, after she has slept and perhaps that was me, just putting off the ‘talk’ we were going to have to have.

  I was watching the kettle boil, as my thoughts ran wild. Ivory was going to end things with me. I could feel it. I felt it since she locked eyes with me in the wardrobe, when I told her that I couldn’t let her know that side of me. I saw the goodbye in her eyes at that moment. It was only prolonged by her dad’s passing.

  Which gave me an opportunity to try and repair some of the damage I’ve done. But I knew Ivory didn’t want to hear it. She was grieving a family member—and I would be the last of her concerns, once she ended it.

  “Morning.”

  My eyes flash from the kettle to Ivory. She was standing there wearing one of my long shirts—and it stirs something in me, seeing her wearing my top.

  “Morning darling.” And I grab the kettle.

  “We need to talk Kace.”

  I hear it in her tone. I pinch my eyes shut for a second and then open them, pouring the hot water in with the tea bag into a cup, and picking it up. Handing it to her.

  She wraps her hands around it, but I notice how she doesn’t touch me, as she takes the cup.

  “It’s about Taylor.” She brings up a subject I wasn’t expecting and I hear the nerves in her voice. “I need to tell you something.”

  My eyes are locked with hers. She has to tell me something? I frown and nod my head.

  “When I was fifteen, I fell pregnant with his child.” She hesitates but keeps her eyes locked with mine. “Links convinced me to have an abortion. But I didn’t want one.” And tears swelled in her eyes. />
  “But you had one?” I found myself asking a question, that wasn’t even a question a few minutes ago. Had she kept his child? Is that what she has to tell me?

  “Yes.”

  And I take a massive exhale. Well that was one way to make me panic and get the heart rate up. “Okay.” I say and wait for her to share more with me.

  “He went to war, just out of nowhere. He left.” Ivory is sharing details with me, the same details her brothers had told me. “My brothers might have told you that.”

  I nod my head.

  “But he came back.”

  I frown. “What last night?”

  She shook her head. “Two months in he was dishonorably discharged.”

  Well her brothers left that out.

  “He came back to propose.” She adds.

  And my expression dropped. Why the fuck didn’t Gabe and Links mention this!

  “He was looking at four years, because of his crimes in the army.” She placed the cup down. “He asked me to wait for him.”

  But she didn’t, did she? Or is that exactly what she did and I was just filling in time while she waited for her man to do his time. Fuck me.

  “Calm down.” Her hands are warm and cupping my face. But my rage is boiling. “Kace calm down.” She whispers against my lips, and then pecks them. But I’m getting more and more worked up, as I grip her hand, I can’t have her touching me right now.

  “So what did you say to him?” I look at her with this pained expression on my face. “Did you say yes.”

  She stares at me and I see the answer as she slowly nods her head. She had said yes.

  “Kace!”

  But I’m already walking out of the room. She’s fucking engaged!

  “Kace!” She rushes past me, standing in the doorway. “Let me finish.” She is begging me but I don’t need to hear another word from her.