Ready for Marriage?

by Beverly Barton; Ann Major Anne Marie Winston

  ‘‘I’m not talking about touching.’’ Although he’d probably give up the deed to his home if he could put his hands on that yielding, tender flesh again. ‘‘I’m talking about the come-hither looks.’’ The light finally changed and he started through the intersection. The church was only two blocks away.

  ‘‘The…’’ Her voice trailed off into silence. ‘‘What on earth is the matter with you? I wouldn’t know how to give a ‘come-hither look’ if my life depended on it.’’

  He was already regretting his words, aware that he wasn’t exactly acting rationally, but the steady increase in arousal he was experiencing, a longing that only grew sharper as the tension grew between them, prevented him from admitting it. Staring through the front windshield, he concentrated on his driving.

  Beside him, Kristin made a small motion of frustration that he caught in his peripheral vision. ‘‘You,’’ she said in a controlled, precise tone, ‘‘are a jerk.’’

  And those were the last words spoken. He parked at the church and she was out of the car and stalking across the parking lot before he could come around to get her door. He took long strides to catch up with her although she completely ignored him, signing her name in the register and slipping into a seat near the back of the quiet room. He took the seat beside her, and she made a production out of moving over so that her body didn’t brush his.

  Hell. What was he going to do about Kristin? Nothing. She’s too young for you. But ever since she’d mentioned marriage and he’d begun to think of her as a woman rather than the girl he’d felt responsible for for the past eight years, he hadn’t been able to ignore her lithe figure.

  The funeral service began then, and he tuned in with relief, shoving aside his troubled thoughts. Most of the board members of the animal sanctuary were there, as were employees and a lot of other local people who had come to know Cathie through her skillful fund-raising efforts. He’d closed his clinic, and Faye was there as well, along with several other members of the staff.

  Beside him, he was aware that Kristin was crying quietly as the minister delivered a touching eulogy. Fishing in his pocket, he offered her his handkerchief, but she studiously ignored him and pulled a tissue from her own pocket. He wanted badly to put his arm around her and offer her comfort—but he suspected that after the way he’d behaved, she’d chew off his arm at the shoulder. Instead, all he could do was watch her from the corner of his eye. He could practically feel the control she exerted to quiet herself.

  By the time the service ended, she was calm again. They made the short ride to the cemetery in utter silence and joined the other mourners for the brief graveside service. Afterward, Kristin stepped forward to speak briefly to Cathie’s parents. He did the same, but then got caught by one of the animal sanctuary’s board members who asked him in a quiet undertone if he had any suggestions for a replacement for Cathie. He shook his head and hurried to catch up with Kris.

  As he came up behind her near the car, he realized she was crying again. She wept silently, her slender shoulders shaking and he stood there awkwardly, wondering what to do. He clenched his fists to prevent himself from reaching out and touching her. But after a moment, he couldn’t take the quiet sobbing anymore and he raised his arms and slipped them around her, pulling her close.

  She burrowed against him instantly like a small creature seeking shelter from harm, her arms tightening around his waist. But almost as instantly she stiffened in his arms. ‘‘I’m not teasing you.’’ Her voice was muffled in his chest.

  A wave of tenderness surged through him and he stroked a hand down her back. ‘‘I know. I’m sorry for that…earlier. I was just in a filthy mood.’’

  She didn’t reply, but her body relaxed against his, and she let him hold her.

  It was a mistake again, touching her, but at least this time he was prepared for the rush of awareness that tightened his gut and made his whole body feel hot and tingly. He bent his head and brushed his lips over the crown of her head. ‘‘I’m sorry. I know you really liked Cathie.’’

  She nodded. ‘‘I did.’’ He could feel her warm breath through his summer-weight shirt and an involuntary shiver chased down his spine. ‘‘Daddy chose her, you know.’’

  He nodded, understanding her grief. ‘‘I know. Brings it all back, doesn’t it?’’

  She nodded.

  Over her head, he saw Faye walking along the edge of the narrow road that wound through the cemetery. As she picked her way around his car, her gaze met his, and she gave him a smug, knowing smile.

  He stifled a ridiculous urge to stick his tongue out at her and helped Kristin into the car. As he drove her home again, he clung to denial: a marriage between them was a ludicrous thought. She was young, fresh. He was a widower with a child. Their personalities didn’t mesh in any way as his had with Deb’s. They’d fight. It would never work.

  The next day was her Saturday to volunteer at the animal sanctuary. She dressed in baggy khaki shorts and a comfortably oversize T-shirt, grabbed a toaster pastry and reached for her car keys. The whole time she was getting ready, she was worrying at the problem of finding a new executive director, mentally writing an ad to place.

  But when she opened her door, Faye Proctor stood on the other side. Kristin nearly barreled into her, jolting to a halt with a gasp of surprise.

  Faye put a hand to her throat and chuckled. ‘‘Lordy, you startled me!’’

  ‘‘You startled me, too.’’ She opened the door and gestured for Faye to enter. ‘‘Come on in. I have to help at Appalachian today but I have a few minutes. What’s up?’’

  Faye sank onto the couch in Kristin’s small living room and Kristin took a seat opposite her. When their eyes met, Faye’s usually cheerful gaze was surprisingly sober. ‘‘Derek told me about your suggestion last week.’’

  Great. If a person could vanish in a puff of smoke, Kristin fervently wished it would happen right now. This very moment. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, feeling heat creep into her face, but when she opened them, Faye was still there, gazing patiently at her.

  ‘‘Oh,’’ said Kristin weakly. ‘‘That…rat.’’

  Faye laughed. ‘‘I betcha ‘rat’ isn’t the word you really want to use!’’

  ‘‘Well, no,’’ she said, smiling a little, ‘‘it’s not.’’

  ‘‘I don’t mean to pry,’’ Faye assured her. ‘‘The thing is, I agree with you, honey.’’

  Kristin stared at the older woman, speechless. She did?

  ‘‘Dr. Mahoney’s a great boss,’’ Faye said, ‘‘and I love working for him. But it’s been hard to watch him shut himself away from everything but that little girl since dear Debbie died. You’re all that’s kept him from folding his tents completely—’’

  ‘‘I don’t know about that,’’ Kristin interrupted.

  ‘‘I do,’’ Faye said. ‘‘You make him eat and go to work. You help with his housework and do his laundry. You’ve raised Miss Mollie, don’t think you haven’t.’’

  ‘‘That may be true, but as Derek pointed out to me, those aren’t reasons to get married.’’ She shrugged, trying to stave off the hurt the memory produced. They’d patched up their disagreement, if that was what that odd, charged exchange in which he’d accused her of teasing him had been, but there had been an uncomfortable strain between them that had lingered until she’d thanked him for the ride and slid out of his car.

  Faye snorted. ‘‘That man can’t see his nose on his own darn face. Don’t you pay him any mind.’’

  Kristin tilted her head. ‘‘What do you mean?’’

  ‘‘Any fool can see you care about Dr. Mahoney,’’ said Faye.

  ‘‘Is it that obvious?’’ She was dismayed.

  ‘‘No, no,’’ said Faye hastily. ‘‘But I’ve known you since you were a little girl and I’ve never seen you look at a man the way you look at Derek when he isn’t looking back.’’

  Kristin felt herself flushing. ‘‘So?’’ She didn’t mean t
o be rude. She’d known Faye long enough to know the older woman wouldn’t take offense.

  ‘‘So you’ve never listened to him before,’’ Faye said, grinning. ‘‘You aren’t going to start now, are you?’’

  Well. She had a point. But still… ‘‘Yes.’’ She made her voice firm. ‘‘I’m not going to live the rest of my life wishing for something I can’t have. If Derek doesn’t want me, I’m going to open myself to other possibilities.’’

  ‘‘You mean other men?’’ Faye’s eyes were wide.

  Kristin nodded.

  ‘‘Don’t be hasty, honey. You dragged him back from the edge of climbing into that grave with Deb,’’ Faye reminded her. ‘‘He didn’t know what was good for him, and he still doesn’t.’’

  ‘‘But…’’ She was at a loss as to how to handle this strange conversation. ‘‘How am I supposed to…what can I do when he says—’’

  ‘‘Feminine wiles.’’ Faye smiled meaningfully. She tapped a brown shopping bag she’d brought in and set on the floor beside her. ‘‘I’ve got a few things in here that my daughter Carlie can’t wear since she had the baby. We’re going to make you look more like a woman.’’

  ‘‘More like a woman?’’ She fingered the mass of shining curls that fell over her shoulder. ‘‘I don’t think I exactly resemble a guy.’’

  ‘‘No,’’ Faye agreed. ‘‘You sure don’t. We’re just going to remind Dr. Mahoney a little bit.’’

  ‘‘How?’’ Kristin asked suspiciously. ‘‘I don’t want to have to wear a bunch of makeup—’’

  ‘‘Honey, with that face and hair you don’t need makeup!’’ Faye stood up and shook out something in a pretty shade of teal that she’d pulled from the bag. ‘‘But your clothes are another matter.’’

  ‘‘I like to be comfortable.’’ What did she mean about the face and hair? The face was too pale, even if she did have pretty eyes, and her hair…the color was nice, but the wild curls refused to be tamed. If she cut it short, it would only form a frizzy halo, so she wore it long and usually braided it or pulled it back.

  ‘‘You like to hide,’’ Faye corrected. ‘‘You won’t be uncomfortable in these things, but you’ll be noticed, that’s for sure.’’

  The teal fabric was a slinky knit dress, sleeveless and scoop-necked. There were several little sleeveless tops, a pair of well-worn jeans and a denim skirt that didn’t look big enough to cover her butt.

  ‘‘The dress is for evening,’’ Faye told her. ‘‘Try this stuff. Once you’ve gotten used to it, we’ll go shopping and get you some things of your own to match the new you.’’

  ‘‘I can’t afford to go shopping.’’ That was true. Her father had poured all his money into establishing Appalachian and had been heavily in debt when he died. Although at seventeen she technically still had been a minor, it had never occurred to her to default on the loans he had made. The money she’d gotten from Derek for the house and the practice had gone a long way toward erasing what she owed, but she still had a heavy schedule of loan payments to make for another year. She could hardly wait until the loan was paid off. Then she could start saving for a house of her own.

  ‘‘Secondhand shops and Goodwill,’’ Faye said. ‘‘I’ve gotten some great stuff there.’’ She shoved the bag into Kristin’s hands. ‘‘Now go try on these things.’’

  Faye was a force of nature when she was on a mission and Kristin knew better than to argue. If she hurried, she wouldn’t be too late.

  Everything fit like a dream. And that was a problem. She was used to wearing loose, baggy clothing. She couldn’t even remember the last time she’d worn a skirt and she felt disconcertingly exposed. Even to church, she wore one of two trouser suits she’d had for years.

  ‘‘I can’t go out in public in this,’’ she said as she came out of the half bath off her small kitchen. ‘‘This’’ was the teal dress. It was deceptively simple on a hanger, but on a body…she was afraid she might just be illegal.

  ‘‘You look terrific!’’ Faye crowed, walking all around her. ‘‘What’s the matter?’’

  ‘‘It’s…’’ She motioned vaguely. ‘‘Too revealing.’’

  ‘‘It’s modest compared to what some girls are wearing these days. Go try the rest.’’

  Faye approved each of the other items, but when Kristin attempted to change back into her own clothing, the older woman shook her head. ‘‘Just wear that today.’’

  Kristin looked down at herself. She was wearing the jean skirt with a spring-green camisole top. The top had a tiny drawstring bow made of ribbon at the rounded neckline, and ribbon was laced through the straps as well. The only saving grace was that she could still wear her bra. ‘‘Isn’t it a little bare?’’

  ‘‘No. It’s summery and feminine. That skirt looks a whole lot better on you than those baggy drawers you’ve been wearing. And wear your hair down.’’ Faye walked around behind her and slipped the loose fabric twist free.

  ‘‘But it gets in my way.’’

  ‘‘Then cut it.’’

  ‘‘No!’’ Kristin put a protective hand to her head. Then she saw Faye’s lips twitch and she smiled reluctantly. ‘‘Okay. I’ll wear it down. It is pretty like this, isn’t it?’’

  ‘‘It’s beautiful, honey,’’ Faye said gently. ‘‘And so are you. Now go to Appalachian and enjoy the compliments you get.’’

  ‘‘All right,’’ she said doubtfully. She probably wouldn’t see many people today, anyway. What was the harm? ‘‘I’ll try it today. But I’m not promising any drastic wardrobe changes.’’

  ‘‘It’s a deal,’’ said Faye.

  ‘‘But Faye…I’m not doing this for Derek.’’ On that point she was certain. ‘‘I’m doing it for me. If he’s not interested, maybe I’ll find someone who is.’’

  The older woman just nodded and smiled. ‘‘Either way, you’re bound to get some reaction.’’

  But from whom? Kristin said farewell to Faye and climbed into her small truck, hoping she wouldn’t be too late. She did whatever was needed, but most often she worked the desk because Cathie said she was so good with the public.

  Her eyes closed briefly in sadness as she thought of Cathie. And then they sprang open again. The public! How had she forgotten? Today was Summerfest, an annual fund-raising and public relations event the animal sanctuary held each June. They’d considered postponing it after Cathie died, but it was too big an event. And in any case, Cathie wouldn’t have wanted that. Summerfest had been her brainstorm originally. The best way to honor her, the board members had decided, was to carry out the event she had organized.

  There would be a skillion visitors, not to mention media attendees, all over the public areas. And here she was, dressed like a refugee from an ’NSYNC concert.

  Three

  It was a beautiful day for Summerfest. The sun shone brightly but there was a hint of breeze and the temperature hovered in the upper seventies just before noon. As Derek lifted Mollie from her car seat, he noticed that there was a sizable crowd milling around the sanctuary parking lot, where many different kinds of booths and activities were set up beneath nearby shade trees.

  In the center of the lot, a local dog club had set up an agility course and members were demonstrating their dogs’ skills on various pieces of equipment. A schedule prominently posted near the refreshment tables displayed times for demonstrations of such varied animal events as guide dog puppy raisers, a bird breeder with her talking parrots, a detection dog team who searched for drugs and a woman who rescued orphaned bear cubs. Pony rides were offered in a nearby meadow as well as guided tours of the sanctuary.

  Derek had just set Mollie on her feet when she gave a piercing squeal. ‘‘Mom-meeeee!’’ He grabbed her just as she nearly made a mad dash across the parking lot.

  ‘‘Whoa, there, chickadee.’’

  ‘‘Down, Daddy!’’ His daughter was a wriggling bundle of feminine outrage. ‘‘I wanna go see Mommy.’’

  He tried to k
eep the frustration he felt from his voice as he said, ‘‘Kristin’s not your mommy, Mollie. She’s our friend.’’

  He glanced at the crowd, his pulse quickening, but he didn’t see her, and he decided Mollie must have been mistaken. But as he reached the edge of the asphalt where the frenzy of the celebration was in full swing, his gaze caught a flash of white blond curls. He lifted his head in time to see Kristin standing in front of the animal sanctuary office with two of the board members.

  Only…was it Kristin? She wore a skirt—Kris never wore skirts. And not just any skirt. A short denim skirt that hugged her slender hips and showed an indecent amount of long, bare leg. With it she wore an equally skimpy little tank top of some clingy fabric that displayed feminine curves he’d had no real idea she possessed. Well, he supposed he had, but he’d just never thought about her that way…until last week. Now it seemed to be all he could think about.

  He surveyed her again, his pulse kicking up a notch. Good lord. It was a wonder every man in the place hadn’t had a heart attack if she’d been walking around like that all morning. Her hair was down—what was with that?—spilling down her back and curling around her shoulders like a caressing hand. Loose tendrils floated in the breeze. As he watched, a strand wafted across the face of the man to her left and he caught it with a smile, tugging playfully as Kristin tried to restrain the rest.

  The half-breathless feeling inside him vanished and he felt like snarling.

  Mollie tugged at his hand again. ‘‘Wanna go see Kristin.’’

  ‘‘Okay.’’ He released her hand and followed more slowly, watching as his daughter made a beeline through the crowd. The buzz of voices around him made it impossible to hear, but he knew the moment Kristin saw Mollie. Her pretty face lit up in a spontaneous expression of delight and she knelt, stretching out her arms.