The Rocker Who Cherishes Me

by Terri Anne Browning

  “Rhett said that she was crying in the bathroom for over an hour.” Liam shook his head in disgust. “Devlin needs to get his head out of his ass, tell her he loves her, and put a ring on her finger before she really does decide to move on.”

  Relief washed over me for a moment that they had been talking about Natalie and not Marissa. But it was short lived…

  “Rissa wasn’t any better, man. Rhett’s worried about her. When I asked what was going on, he refused to tell me, but kept repeating that we needed to keep an eye on her.” Linc downed the rest of his coffee and set the empty mug on the table between us, his eyes telling me just how much he disliked me. I didn’t flinch away from that hard glare. I knew that it was my fault that Marissa was in so much pain. But I was trying to fix things, damn it. If she would just let me in for five minutes I could make her love me again.

  I didn’t comment, however. Just finished my coffee and three more cups before going to take a shower. The coffee had helped with the little men jumping on my brain, but the shower woke the rest of my body up. I felt like a different man as I dried off and dressed in my favorite tattered jeans and an OtherWorld shirt that was at least five years old.

  By the time I returned, most of the others were up and moving around. Liam was still sitting with Linc at the table and Zander was standing at the fridge with a box of cereal in one hand and a gallon of milk in the other. He was dressed in nothing more than a pair of basketball shorts and I was about to tell him to put a shirt on when I saw that Marissa was sitting on the couch with Natalie…

  And sitting right between them was Rhett Fucking Tomlinson.

  For fucking real? I knew for a fact that the bus hadn’t stopped any since I’d gotten up so that meant the fucker had been on the bus all night. All. Fucking. Night. Had he slept with Marissa last night? Had they had sex while I was passed out? I was going to tear him limb from limb if that was the case.

  “What the fuck is Tomlinson doing on here?” I blinked, because while the words were screaming through my brain they hadn’t been spoken by me. Turning, I found Devlin standing right behind me, his aquamarine eyes like lasers trained on Rhett’s head. “Did he sleep here?”

  Of the five of us in OtherWorld, I’d always thought of Devlin as the level headed one of us all. He was the one with the teenaged kid, the one that had to make the hard decisions when it came to parenting and work. Normally he was the one who looked at things from all sides, got all points of view before he started running his mouth. Yet when it came to Natalie he wasn’t level headed at all. He was easy to piss off, ready to rage and destroy anything that happened to be in the path of what he wanted.

  “I slept here,” Rhett confirmed when Natalie didn’t look like she was going to open her mouth. I doubted she’d even heard anything that Dev had just said the way her eyes were locked on his bare chest at the moment. He met Devlin’s eyes with a boldness that was either really stupid or really gutsy. The next words out of his mouth proved to me that he was the former more than the latter. “Marissa asked me to.”

  Some of the tension in Devlin’s body eased, but it only transferred to me. Times a billion. “You’re fucking kidding me. Right?” I was talking louder than I normally would have done, making me sound more like a bear than human, but I couldn’t seem to help it. I was about to scream the place down if what that little prick was saying was the truth. My eyes went straight to Marissa who was sitting calmly beside the rocker as if she wasn’t tearing me apart inside. She had to know that it would kill me. “Did he sleep with you last night, Rissa?”

  When she shrugged, she might as well have cut my heart out of my chest. It might have hurt less if she had. “He slept in my bed last night…” She bit her lip as if debating continuing before she shrugged again. “But sleeping was all that happened if you really must know.”

  “Oh, I really must know,” I bellowed and before I could even realize what I was doing I was standing in front of both of them. Someone pulled Natalie up off the couch, out of danger, and Rhett was smart enough to shrink back against the couch as I leaned down and put my face in Marissa’s. “You want someone to share your bed, you climb into mine. If I find out this happens again I will kill him, Mari. Do you hear me? I. Will. Kill. Him.”

  “Wroth—” she began but I cut her off.

  I pressed my lips hard against hers for a quick, rough kiss. “Don’t,” I growled when I pulled back. “Don’t push me. I’ve killed men before, I have no problem doing it again.” And this time I would enjoy it.

  She didn’t flinch back in fear, but her blue eyes did darken with understanding, compassion. “I know, Wroth.” Her voice was gentle, as if she were talking to a wounded animal. Maybe I was. It felt like I was bleeding on the inside. Damn her and damn my love for this woman. The pain was overwhelming, making my breathing come in sharp pants.

  She raised a hand and cupped the side of my face. “But that wasn’t your fault. You had to kill those men or be killed yourself. If anything, I’m glad you did that. You came home, Wroth, and I don’t care what you had to do to make that happen.” She pushed me back and I went without giving it a second thought. I might be ready to kill the man sitting beside her but I would never physically hurt Marissa.

  She stood and then her arms were wrapping around my waist. “You don’t have to kill Rhett. He didn’t do anything wrong. We’re just friends, I swear.”

  Having her arms around me calmed me like nothing else ever would. Fuck, I’d missed this. Her assurance that she didn’t blame me for having to kill men, that doing the things I’d done wasn’t my fault, was almost like a healing salve to my soul and I buried my face in her neck. Her long, glorious hair hid my face and I let my guard down for a moment as I let her acceptance wash over me like a baptism of forgiveness. It was what I’d always needed, her forgiveness—hers and no one else’s—for the abysmal things I’d had to do to survive. For things that I’d felt contaminated me and would eventually infect her with the dirtiness of them. Last year I’d started to forgive myself, but now it was complete and I was able to breathe just a little easier as she rubbed soothing circles on my back.

  We stood there like that for a long while. I didn’t want to release her, not when she was in my arms and each inhale I took was filled with her special scent. But with her that close, my body began to respond in a way it didn’t respond to other chicks any more. My dick hardened and twitched against her soft stomach. Marissa gasped in surprise and I tightened my arms around her in fear that she was going to pull away.

  Someone cleared their throat behind me and I reluctantly raised my head to find Linc standing there with Natalie beside him. “Before you really do go all rage monster and start killing people, maybe I should clarify something.” I raised a brow at him and he opened his mouth to speak, but Natalie jumped in, cutting him off.

  “Rhett and I are friends with benefits. You don’t have to worry about him and Marissa, Wroth. Rhett and I are exclusive.”

  Linc turned to glare at her and shook his head just as Devlin punched the wall and walked back toward the roosts, turning the air blue with the curses coming out of his mouth. While what Natalie had said was a relief, I was pretty sure that she had just lied by the look on Linc’s face.

  “Are you trying to get him killed?” Linc snapped when the sliding door to the roosts slammed shut so hard that the bus actually rocked. From the front of the bus the driver slowed down.

  “I can take care of myself, Linc,” Rhett assured him.

  “You really don’t know what you’re getting yourself into with Dev, man,” Zander commented from the kitchenette. “I still have trouble breathing at times from the last fight we got into.”

  Liam made an agreeing sound but didn’t speak as he watched everyone around him as if we were stars in some soap opera he was interested in. Knowing him and his twisted sense of humor at times, we probably were.

  Linc turned the glare on the man still sitting on the couch. Rhett didn’t look particularly wor
ried about how pissed Devlin now was. It only strengthened my conviction that the rocker was stupid. I truly was like a rage monster when I got pissed, but that meant that I was quick to take action and when it was over I was fine—for the most part. Devlin? He was like a hurricane. He started out by letting his anger simmer, until it gained steam, powering him forward and he was soon out of control. He would destroy everything in his path when he reached the peak of his wrath and there would be no stopping him.

  Which would leave Rhett Tomlinson in a body bag, along with anyone else who stepped in Devlin’s way.

  “Look,” Linc met my gaze head on, ignoring Rhett and Natalie now, “you have nothing to worry about because Rhett is with me. Not Natalie and definitely not Marissa. He might act like he’s a lady killer, but that’s just his beard. He likes dick.” His lips lifted in a conceited grin. “Particularly my dick.” Rhett snorted, but didn’t deny it. “Maybe you should assure the beast now tearing the place down, before we wreck.”

  If the bus shook when Devlin had slammed the door a few minutes ago it was nothing compared to what he was doing back there now. I heard the loud thuds as he continued to beat the walls with his fists and clenched my jaw as the bus swerved dangerously. Sighing, I stepped back from Marissa who clung for just a moment before releasing me, and led the way back to the roosts. Liam flanked me, with Zander bringing up the rear.

  I had to force the door open because Devlin had warped it when he’d slammed it shut. Or maybe it was the dozen or so indentions of his fist in the door? Either way I had to use some serious muscle to get the door open. The sight I saw when I was finally able to step inside twisted my gut. Mattresses had been pulled out of roosts. Covers, sheets, pillows and even a stuffed animal were tossed around the sleeping area. There were holes in the walls and even a dent in the ceiling.

  And all of that destruction had taken less than three or four minutes and he was still throwing things.

  The bus started to slow more and then pulled off onto the side of the road. I knew what was coming. Knew that we had about sixty seconds before the fires of hell arrived and engulfed us with her rage. Emmie was going to bust balls as soon as she set foot on board this bus and there was nothing anyone could do to stop it.

  “Do we have to stop him?” Zander asked, staring at the carnage in front of us. “The way this place looks and from the way he keeps throwing punches at the walls, I’m pretty sure that someone is gonna end up with a bloody nose and a black eye or two. And if Emmie goes in there and deals with him someone isn’t walking out alive. My money’s on the hot chick.”

  So was mine.

  The space we were standing in was narrow but Natalie suddenly appeared and pushed past us. When she was inside the sleeping area, she pushed me back and shut the door in my face. I blinked, not sure I’d just seen that little chick shut something so easily that had taken most of my strength to get open.

  From the front of the bus I could hear Emmie already demanding to know what was going on and I shared a glance between the two bassists standing behind me. Did we go out there and deal with her or hide out right here? It might sound cowardly, but I’d rather face an army of enemy soldiers single handedly than one itty bitty redhead with big green eyes.

  Chapter 9

  Marissa

  The sleeping area was a disaster, but after I helped Natalie put the beds back together all that was left were a bunch of dents and a few holes in the walls. I don’t know how Natalie had calmed Devlin down, but things had gotten very quiet back here not long after she had locked herself in with him. She’d either knocked him out or they’d had sex.

  From the smug look on Devlin’s face when he’d walked out twenty minutes later, sex had definitely been the answer. By then I’d convinced Emmie that everything was okay and that she could go back to her own bus and we’d gotten back on the road. She’d given in because even the smallest delay would throw off tonight’s concert—and the possibility of Nik finding out what was going on aboard our bus would only get back to Drake and Shane and then there would be two homicidal rockers on the loose with two other rockers ready to back up their band brothers. Emmie didn’t like delays or having to make fans, who’d paid good money to see the bands she represented, have to wait even a few minutes longer than they had to. And she especially didn’t like having to bail her Demons out of jail, which had happened far too often with at least one of them. Jesse Thornton hadn’t always been the responsible man Layla had made him.

  When we had pulled over, Axton had climbed on board and now the guys were all practicing in the living room. I lay down on my bed and listened to Axton’s voice and let it soothe me. I’d always liked Axton, but I liked him even more now. He was a different man with Dallas, a better man. He didn’t hide his feelings anymore, let people see what he was really thinking—mostly. The last tour he’d made sure that he and Dallas had their own bus so that she could relax while in her second trimester of pregnancy with Cannon. This tour they had their adopted daughter with them, Kenzie, who was helping out Emmie’s nannie by taking care of a few of the children when the parents were busy, so there were three of us who could help watch the kids during concerts.

  Kenzie was a really sweet girl. She would be turning nineteen in a few weeks, but she still looked younger. Years in an orphanage, not getting enough to eat, had left the girl on the small side and no matter how much food you set in front of her she only ate smaller portions because it was so ingrained in her to do so. Kenzie had just finished her freshmen year at Knoxville’s University of Tennessee, where she was studying to be a special education teacher. Dallas had told me that Kenzie worked at a nursing home that was specifically for Down syndrome patients who had basically been abandoned by their families. Apparently the pay was little to nothing, but Kenzie was happy working there and that was all that mattered to Dallas and Axton.

  From the front of the bus, a guitar solo started and I closed my eyes. Wroth’s pain earlier, seeing it shining from his eyes was like a beacon drawing me in. I’d been helpless to not comfort him. Maybe I’d been the only one to notice, but his voice had cracked just a little when he had said he’d killed men before. I knew he’d had to do some horrible things while in Afghanistan, knew that that time still haunted him. When I’d still lived at the farm with him, I’d been woken up countless times to the sounds of his nightmares. I knew better than to go to him though. The one and only time I’d gone to check on him, when I was seventeen, I’d ended up with my first and only black eye from his thrashing arms. When he’d woken up and seen what he’d done, he’d made me promise to never come back during one of his nightmares. I’d promised, but there had been times when it had taken everything inside of me to keep it.

  I would never hold anything he had to do to survive against him; if anything, I was grateful he’d done those things. He’d been serving his country, making our country a safer place, but it had also brought him back to me. Sure I’d just been a kid at the time, but I’d loved him even then.

  I still loved him.

  Hence the problem I was facing with the bet I’d made with Natalie. I’d never make another one while angry again, that was for sure. I wanted to let Wroth back in, but did I really want to walk away when it came time to make him bleed? I wasn’t sure…

  I must have drifted off, because a noise—or lack of noise woke me. Sighing, I opened my eyes and met the espresso gaze of the man who haunted my dreams. Gasping in surprise, I started to pull away, but his hands tightened on my waist and kept me trapped against his side. His head lowered quickly and captured my lips in a kiss that stole my breath along with my common sense.

  He tasted like the coffee I’d become so addicted to lately and that made me greedy for more. My hands climbed up his chest, over the hard muscles of his neck and into his short hair, pulling his head down harder. My tongue dueled with his for entrance inside his hot mouth where I devoured the taste of coffee and something far richer. My taste buds exploded while my heart was beating against
my chest as if it were trying to claw its way out of me and into him.

  That groan that was more growl escaped him and his right hand drifted down my left side before cupping my rear hard enough to leave bruises, but I didn’t care. I would savor the soreness later, I silently promised myself as I continued to kiss him like my life depended on it. Wroth’s hand drifted lower on my hip, skimming over the seam of my rear through the yoga pants I was wearing, and then lower. Without thinking, I instinctively spread my legs a little and he dipped his fingers between them, cupping my sex.

  My panties, already wet from our kiss, became drenched instantly and he made another growling sound in approval. Wroth thrust his hips forward, fitting his hardness against my sweet spot through his boxers and the rough material of his jeans and my thin layers of yoga pants and cotton panties. I couldn’t continue to kiss him while he was doing that or I would end up passing out from lack of oxygen to my poor brain. I pulled away from his lips, and his head followed but not to kiss my mouth. Instead he buried his face in my neck and started nibbling, sucking, tasting me as if I were his favorite flavor of candy.

  His teeth sunk into the tender spot where my shoulder met my neck and I was helpless to keep in a moan that was a mixture of pain and pleasure. More pleasure than pain, though. Much, much more pleasure. “Wroth!” I gasped his name as he withdrew his teeth only to sink them in again before pulling the flesh into his mouth and sucking. My eyes rolled back into my head and my nails sunk into his back as I held on through the almost orgasmic feeling of him sucking on my flesh like that.

  “You’re mine, Mari,” he growled against my ear when he finally released my skin.

  I closed my eyes, savoring those words and at the same time fearing them. I wanted to be his, but what if he broke my heart again? How could I have a relationship with him when I’d be constantly terrified that he was cheating on me?