Isaac's Decision

by Ruth Ann Nordin

  “You know,” Clayton began, “it’s possible she’s not interested. She could be avoiding you.”

  Wiley frowned. “You think that’s it?”

  “You’ve been trying to track her down for half a year now, and whenever you get the chance to talk to her, she’s rushing off to do something. I hate to say it, but I think you’re better off pursuing someone else.”

  Wiley sighed and picked up his gun. “You’re probably right.”

  At that, Emily finally looked up at him and said, “There’s no sense in chasing something that doesn’t want to be caught. If a woman’s interested, she’ll find a way to see you.”

  Isaac’s heart leapt at her words. Perhaps she came out here today so she could see him. He knew he shouldn’t get his hopes up. She could be there to hunt. But that seemed like a long shot. Maybe, just maybe, he had a reason to hope she might be willing to take off her wig and mustache and talk to him as Emily.

  “I suppose the writing’s been on the wall for a while now,” Wiley said with a shrug. “It’s a shame. I really like her.”

  “There’ll be someone else,” Emily told him. “It’s a matter of time but you’ll find her. When it’s right, you two will know.”

  “That’s easier said than done,” Wiley said. “I’m not exactly good when it comes to women.”

  “You can’t base that on what Emily does,” Clayton replied.

  “It’s not just Emily. Remember Clara and Isabelle? They didn’t want to talk to me either,” Wiley said.

  Clayton laughed. “Alright. I take it back. You aren’t good when it comes to women. Maybe you should become a priest.”

  Wiley grimaced and shook his head. “I don’t think so. Someday I’d like to have sex.”

  Deciding it was time to change topics since Emily didn’t need to hear this type of talk, Isaac turned to his deer. “Are you ready to see who won?”

  She took a deep breath and nodded, so he pulled his deer over to hers for a comparison and was relieved when he saw his was bigger.

  “That was close,” Wiley said. “Fine shooting, men.”

  Emily’s shoulders slumped. “Alright. You win, Isaac. What do you want me to do?”

  What he wanted her to do couldn’t be done in front of the others, so what he needed was a decoy. “Hunt for one more hour.”

  Her eyebrows furrowed, and the others looked equally confused. “Why?” she asked.

  “I don’t know. I just enjoy the challenge of hunting, especially since you almost won.”

  “Well, I have to get home,” Wiley said, “and judging by my luck today, I’m not wasting another hour.”

  Clayton held up his pheasant and sighed. “Same here. This is pathetic.”

  Isaac didn’t think they’d leave, but he realized this was the opportunity he needed so he was relieved to watch them go. When they were out of hearing distance, he turned to Emily, his heartbeat picking up now that he was alone with her.

  “You want to hunt?” she asked, still not looking convinced. “That’s the thing you won?”

  “Yes. Another hour hunting with you.” It wasn’t all he wanted to do, but he wasn’t sure how to get to the point where he could remove her disguise. “What do you say?”

  She shrugged. “Sure. It’s simple enough.”

  He waited until she settled back down on the ground with her gun before he retrieved his gun and sat by her.

  “What are you doing?” she asked, her eyes wide.

  “Since it’s just the two of us, there’s no need to spread out.” Plus, he didn’t really intend to hunt with her. He wanted to have the talk they were long overdue to have.

  “I suppose…” She shifted so that she was a little bit further from him. Peering around the tree, she studied the area. “We might have caught the best of what’s here.”

  “Maybe.” He took his time checking the gun, pretending to make sure there were enough bullets. This was his chance. All he had to do was not ruin it. Clearing his throat, he said, “Remember that conversation we had last week? The one about books?”

  “Yes,” she said, still examining the area for animals.

  Making a pretense of looking for game, he continued, “I was wondering if you read any good books.”

  “Oh, not really. I don’t care much for books people say is great literature. Don’t know why.”

  “Do you like to read at all?”

  “Depends on the book.”

  He took a deep breath. This was it. “Have you heard of dime novels?”

  She stopped looking for animals and slowly turned her head until her eyes met his. “Sure, I’ve heard of them. Who hasn’t?”

  “Well, have you read one?”

  She paused and then asked, “Have you?”

  “Actually, I have. They’re entertaining.”

  After a moment passed, she nodded but didn’t say anything.

  “What kind do you read?” he asked.

  “Um, adventure stories. You know, things that men like.”

  He resisted the urge to chuckle since she seemed to be considering her options of what she should or shouldn’t say. Quickly debating the pros and cons of pressing her further, he finally decided he should at this point. The morning had been long enough, and now it was noon. He only had one hour to work things out with her since that was his part of the bet. He set his gun aside and scooted closer to her.

  Looking startled, she made an attempt to shift away from him again, but he said, “Emily, please don’t.”

  She stilled and stared at him with wide eyes.

  He reached out and removed her hat and wig. He tried to take her mustache off, but she winced so he let go of it and said, “You better do that one.”

  With a sigh, she removed it. “How long have you known?”

  “Since Thursday.”

  “How did you find out?”

  “I was going to burn the trash at school and saw your report. You did it on the book I told you about.”

  “Oh. Leave it to Eva to throw it in the trash for everyone to see.”

  He laughed at the way she rolled her eyes. “You know it’s wrong to cheat. You pretty much wrote down everything I said word for word on the summary of the book.”

  “Did you tell her I cheated?” she asked, her eyes narrowed at him.

  “No, I didn’t.”

  Her face relaxed. “Thank you.”

  “I know you love to read dime novels, and I know what Eva told you what she thought of people who read them.”

  “Yeah, well, she’s perfect.”

  “No, she’s not. She was judging people who read dime novels, and that meant she was judging you. Even if she didn’t know she did it, she still did.” And now came his part. With a deep breath, he continued, “And I’m not any better. I was wrong. I judged the situation between us based on what someone else was telling me to think instead of paying attention to what you had to say and considering who you are. I understand my pa has problems with your pa, and this has led to how he thinks of you. I tried to tell him that you aren’t your real mother—your pa’s first wife. I know you’re a good woman. You’ve never used your beauty inappropriately. You don’t tease men to do your bidding.”

  She closed her eyes and sighed. “My real mother has quite the reputation, even after all this time.”

  “Because my pa refuses to let go of the past, and he shouldn’t do that. You’re not her. It’s time you were judged on your own merits.”

  Opening her eyes, she turned her gaze to him. “No, I’m not her. I hate her and everything she stood for.”

  “I know,” he softly replied. “I read everything you wrote in the report, and there’s no doubt in my mind you’re telling me the truth.”

  After a moment of silence, she started to tuck a strand of hair back into her bun, but he put his hand on hers. “What is it?” she asked.

  “Will you take your hair down? Please?”

  “Alright,” she finally replied.

  He removed h
is hand and watched as she pulled the pins out of her hair so that her wavy locks fell down past her shoulders. “You’re beautiful, Emily.”

  Her eyebrows furrowed and she swallowed. He recognized the uncertainty in her eyes. Cupping her face in his hands, he willed the fierce pounding of his heart to calm down, but the task struck him as impossible. How could he calm down when he was with her, touching her smooth skin and brushing her lips with his thumb? His gaze went to her mouth. It was now or never.

  Working up his nerve, he leaned forward and brought his lips to hers. He hadn’t kissed anyone before, and he worried he wasn’t doing it right. But she leaned into him and returned his kiss. Encouraged, he deepened the kiss as years of repressed desire flooded to the surface and overwhelmed him. He struggled to hold onto a sense of normalcy, but he had the strange sensation that the world was tilting around him and all he could do was see where all of this was taking him.

  It was with great reluctance he ended the kiss. He could probably kiss her all day and feel he needed to kiss her more. It seemed that with Emily, he could never get enough of her. The feeling excited him and frightened him at the same time. But she had kissed him back, and that meant it wasn’t too late for them. It couldn’t be. But to be sure, he had to ask it so she could reassure him that everything would be alright, that they could still be together.

  “Emily, you said it wasn’t too late,” he whispered. “Can you still say that, after what I said and did on Wednesday?”

  Tears filled her eyes even though she smiled. “You have miserable timing, Isaac. You’re slow by two days, but it’s not too late.”

  He returned her smile and laughed, relieved. “Good because you’re the only one I want to spend the rest of my life with.”

  He pulled her into his arms and brought his lips back to hers, and this time the kiss wasn’t as awkward as the one he’d given her before.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Emily’s heart swelled with excitement as she returned Isaac’s kiss. He not only wanted to be with her, but he’d chosen to be with her even though his father didn’t want him to be. She didn’t know how the day would turn out, and she almost decided not to go hunting. But she knew she’d regret it if she didn’t make one last attempt to make it work with Isaac, especially after learning how he felt about her.

  And now here she was, in his arms and being swept into the bliss of kissing him. She’d imagined him kissing her in the dime novels she’d read when she pretended that she was the heroine and he was the hero, but it was much better kissing him in real life. If only this moment could last forever. But it wouldn’t, and even if he’d chosen to be with her, there was still the reality of the situation waiting for them when they went back home.

  After the kiss ended, he pulled away from her and brushed her cheeks with his thumbs, a gentle caress that seemed a mere whisper on her skin. “Thank you,” he softly said. “I was afraid I ruined everything. There’s more we have to learn about each other. Three years is a long time to go without talking. There’s bound to have been same changes, but I know my life won’t be complete unless you’re in it.”

  “Isaac…” She considered what she wanted to say before she continued. “What are we going to do when our parents find out? They won’t be happy about it.”

  “We’ll just have to stay together. We can’t control how they react. All we can do is control what we do, and I won’t let my pa tell me who I can or can’t marry.”

  Emily nodded. “We’ll stay together no matter what.”

  Smiling, he gave her a quick kiss before he settled against the tree near them. He motioned for her to sit with him, so she did and he brought his arms around her. She leaned into him and rested her head on his shoulder.

  “I have a confession to make,” he said while he rubbed her back in soft, lazy motions.

  “What’s that?”

  “I really do read dime novels from time to time.”

  She laughed. “Do you really?”

  “Yes,” he replied, also laughing, “though I would never have had the nerve to bring one to the schoolhouse.”

  “You should have asked me to cover it up with brown paper.”

  “I should’ve.” After a peaceful moment of silence, he said, “I’m not going back to school. Wiley and Clayton are already working, so I can, too.”

  “Is this because I’m not going back?”

  He shrugged. “I don’t think there’s anything for me to do there. Miss Conn-” he paused before continuing—“Eva isn’t teaching me anything I can’t teach myself.”

  “She likes you.”

  “I know.” He gave her a hug and kissed the top of her head. “That’s another reason why I can’t go back. It was bearable before my pa brought her over for supper, but ever since then, it’s changed everything in that schoolhouse.” He chuckled.

  “What’s so funny?” she asked.

  “Well, last Saturday, I had no idea you were pretending to be Elmer, but if I did, I wouldn’t have told you about the book I did.”

  “Why not?”

  “I don’t know. It doesn’t seem like something a woman should read.”

  She groaned, but considering his arms were around her and his tone was teasing, she smiled. “I’m fully capable of handling the darker side of literature. In fact, I’ll have you know I’ve read some stories written for men.”

  “The dime novel I saw you reading that day was written for women.”

  “True, most of the stories I read are intended for a female audience, but I’ve been known to pick up dime novels with suspense and action in them, and some of these novels included murder. I’m not so feeble-minded that I can’t handle the book you told me about where a character imagines a person who tells him he must kill others.”

  “Ah, but we don’t know if the character imagined the person or not. The person could have been real.”

  “I say he imagined it. It makes the most sense given his path to justifying his sin.”

  “It doesn’t necessarily make the most sense. I think we are more easily persuaded by others.”

  She arched her head back so she could see his face. “Maybe you are easily swayed, but I am not.”

  Looking amused, he turned his gaze in her direction. “You’re not?”

  “No. I know what I want and no one tells me otherwise.”

  He laughed and gave her a quick kiss. Growing serious, he said, “I missed this, you know.”

  “Missed what? Having me dress up in pants and sitting in your arms?”

  “No, silly. We’ve never done this before. I missed talking to you. It seemed that we had a lot of fun together. You know, joking around and talking about nothing important.” Rubbing his hand up and down her arm, he softly added, “I didn’t realize how much I missed it until today.”

  “I missed it, too. It really hurt when you stopped talking to me. I felt like I lost a friend.”

  “Me too.”

  “I’m glad you’re back.”

  Brushing her hair from her shoulder, he whispered, “So am I.”

  And then they continued to talk for a couple more hours.

  ***

  By the time Isaac got home, it was nearing suppertime. He probably shouldn’t have spent most of the afternoon with Emily, but given that he’d been forbidden to talk to her for so long, they had a lot to catch up on and even one afternoon wasn’t enough to make up for lost time. His lips were still tingling from kissing her, and the memory of holding her in his arms warmed his skin so he didn’t notice the drop in temperature.

  He stopped the buckboard at the house, set the brake and hopped down. When he reached the first porch step, Rachel opened the front door and called out, “You caught two deer?”

  Glancing at the buckboard, he shrugged. “Well, I caught one. Elmer gave me the one he caught.” It was weird to say Elmer now that he knew it was Emily, but he knew there was no way his father would approve of what he’d been doing that afternoon, let alone admit Emily had been
dressed up as a man. Turning back to Rachel, he asked, “Where’s Pa?”

  “In the kitchen.”

  “Thanks. I’ll let him know we got the animals to take care of.”

  She stepped aside so he could enter the parlor. He took off his boots, knowing his mother would give him a hard time for tracking mud through her house if he didn’t.

  Jacob looked up from the game of checkers he and Adam were playing. “Took you long enough to come home.”