Harry (Southern Sands Book 2)
Page 18
His voice was soft when he spoke again. “You have no idea how bad I feel about this entire situation. I know I should have handled it better. You have to believe me when I say I didn’t mean for Emily to be led on or for you to be pulled into the middle of it.”
Bailey didn’t say anything as she turned his words over in her mind. At this point, she wasn’t sure she even cared enough to try and fight this anymore. He fucked up. He realized it. He admitted it. He was trying to make it right. Was drawing this out the way to go?
No, it wasn’t.
She scooted to him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. “I get it. It’s fine. Well…it’s not ‘fine’ per say, but I’m over it.” And she was. Emily was gone and it was the two of them. It was their time to figure life out and be together, she just knew it.
Harry reached up and squeezed her hand.
“Let’s go to bed,” she said, tugging on his shoulders.
She released her hold on him and stood. She walked around the room, turned lights off and checked her door was locked. She could feel his gaze on her, burning her with its intensity. She looked over her shoulder as she walked toward her living room, catching his longing stare and passed through the door. His footsteps sounded behind her, and when she got under her covers, she looked at him, standing in the door, still staring at her.
She could read the indecision on his face, telling her that he was more bothered by everything than he let on. She sighed. “Look, if it bothers you that much, we can talk about it more tomorrow. But for now? I’d really like to go to bed and cuddle with you. I’m tired and I know you have to be as well.”
He eventually nodded. She saw his silhouette shuffle across her floor, and the bed creaked when he put a knee on the edge before sliding under the covers.
She rolled to face him, snuggling into his side once he moved his arm. She wiggled to adjust how she was laying and threw a leg over one of Harry’s. She sighed as she relaxed, feeling calmed by the steady beat of Harry’s heart against her cheek.
Slowly, she drifted into one of the best night’s sleep she’d had in a while.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Bailey
Bailey woke up the next morning being stifled by something warm. She tried to kick her blanket off, but it wouldn’t budge. She opened her eyes and squinted against the small beam of light spearing her in the eyes.
She groaned low in her throat as she screwed her eyes shut again. More carefully, she opened her eyes slowly to help them adjust to the light. She looked around at what little she could see from the way she was lying. She was definitely in her room, so that was a positive.
Everything looked the same. But it didn’t feel the same. Mainly, she didn’t feel the same. A heavy weight rested on her side and was cupping her breast. She looked down and saw a hand there, which meant it was an arm on her side. One mystery solved.
She thought back to the night before and remembered Harry coming by and the angry sex they'd had. She lay there, waiting for the onset panic to kick in. It was her thing. She and Harry got together and she lost it the next morning or sometimes even right after. So far, nothing. She felt…calm.
And that freaked her out even more. Being calm wasn’t normal and she could feel the panic rising in her because she wasn’t panicking. The warmth she felt when she first woke up was now a blazing inferno. She was too hot. But in moving Harry’s arm to get up, he would probably wake up. She wasn’t sure what to do.
Her legs shifted and she suddenly couldn’t get comfortable as her mind raced over the implications of her non-panic panic. Nervous energy coursed through her body and she knew she needed to get up to expend it somehow.
“What’s wrong?” Harry asked, still half asleep behind her.
She froze. She hadn’t realized he was awake.
“Bailey.”
She licked her lips.
“Are you about to bolt?”
She heard the sadness in his voice and realized she needed to get over it and explain everything to him. She wiggled away and rolled over to face him. She took a moment to appreciate him in his sleep-rumpled state. His hair was everywhere and his eyelids were still heavy; regardless he was so handsome. She reached out to trace his cheek, making him sigh.
“I’m not bolting,” she told him as her hand dropped to the bed.
“Then what’s wrong?” His eyes searched her face.
“I’m not…sure how to say it.” Harry remained silent, letting her work through her thoughts herself. She appreciated that.
“I think I’m freaked out that I’m not freaking out.”
Harry chuckled and closed his eyes. “Only you would spazz about that.”
She giggled. “Yeah, I know. I just realized that I really want this and I’m okay with it and…I don’t know. It’s not my normal, I guess.”
Harry opened his eyes and nodded. “Is that a bad thing?”
She shook her head. “No, it’s not. Just weird.”
They lapsed into silence and Bailey enjoyed it. One thing about Harry was that he didn’t try to fill silence. The two of them could just sit and be.
She licked her lips as she considered whether she should tell Harry everything. Everything about why she was so resistant for seven years. Why she broke up with him initially. Why she couldn’t commit.
“I can hear you thinking from over here.”
Bailey looked at him and met his gaze. Though he still looked sleepy, he was certainly more alert and had pinned her with his intense gaze.
“It’s just…I feel like I need to explain myself.” Harry continued to stare at her, not saying anything and Bailey took it as her cue to continue. “Remember me talking about my parents when we first started dating?” He nodded and Bailey continued. “Well, they were in the process of finalizing a nasty divorce when we broke up.”
“Oh-kay…” Harry sounded confused. “I’m not sure what that has to do with us.”
“Everything.” She sighed.
“Care to elaborate?”
She dropped her gaze so that she wasn’t staring into his eyes anymore. She wasn’t sure she could do that and admit that she’d let her parent’s divorce color her perception of every relationship she’d had.
She focused on the slight dip between his pectoral muscles as she explained.
“Growing up, my parents were the fairytale that people talk about. In love and so gross about it, kissing everywhere.”
She wrinkled her nose at the memory of walking into rooms and catching her parents in a passionate embrace. She swallowed before continuing. “That all started to crumble when I was in high school. It was subtle at first, my dad going on long trips and staying at the office later and later.” Those passionate embraces then morphed into passionate fights, but she wouldn’t tell Harry that. “Finally, it came to a head. My dad admitted he’d met someone else and was leaving my mom. She was devastated. Wailed and begged for him not to leave, but it was already done. He’d moved his stuff out in the preceding weeks and she hadn’t even noticed.” She paused as emotion clogged her throat, trying to gain control before she continued. “I met her once. The new woman was just a younger version of my mom. If you looked at photos of my mom when she and my dad first met, this woman could have been her twin. It’s uncanny.” She stopped talking, digging to find the will to continue.
“Thank you for telling me. But I’m not sure what this has to do with us?” Harry interjected.
She sighed and closed her eyes, preparing herself to admit the final part. “My mom was devastated. Torn about and made into a shell of who she once was because of the man she professed to love. She descended into alcohol abuse.”
Bailey stuttered over those last few words, realization dawning on her own abuse just a few weeks earlier. “She’s nothing like she was. She’s a bitter old woman that raves against giving your heart away. Seeing that showed me that love wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. That fairytale? A façade, nothing more. I didn’t want to put myself through the pain of
what my mom went through. So, I decided I just wouldn’t commit to falling in love and keep everyone at arm's length.”
She risked a look up at Harry and saw he was staring at her contemplatively. She bit her lip as she waited to see if he would say something.
“Again, thank you for sharing that with me. But their story isn’t our story. It’s shitty that your mom went through that, but that doesn’t mean you will. I think the fact that we’ve been circling each other for seven years is proof of that.”
Bailey considered his words. Was he right? It made sense. They’d never really moved on. They always returned to each other after some time apart, and it was like time never passed when they got back together. Being with Harry was a bit like being home, a warm feeling coursing through her body when they were together. It was at that point that she realized he was right. Her parents wouldn’t define her or them. Their situation was shitty, but it wasn’t her story. Her story would be different, she’d make sure of it.
She released a slow breath. “You’re right.”
Harry blinked at her in surprise, his mouth dropping open. “I am?”
She nodded. “Yeah, you are. Our story isn’t theirs.”
He snapped his mouth shut. “Can I have you say that later so I can record it for posterity?”
She slapped him lightly on the chest. “You buffoon.”
He laughed and pulled her into his arms. “I might be a buffoon, but you love me.”
“I do.”
Admitting that was surprisingly easy. She’d already admitted what she considered her darkest secret, so what was an admission of love to Harry?
He placed a finger under her chin and tilted her head up. “Promise me that you’ll talk to me before you completely freak out and run.”
She winced. She did have a tendency to run before talking things through. She’d have to work on that if she wanted this relationship to really work and last. “I promise.”
He kissed her lips. “What do you say we get dressed and see about some breakfast?”
Bailey’s stomach grumbled in response and Harry laughed. “I think we have your agreement.”
He threw the covers off, making Bailey screech at the cool air caressing her skin, goosebumps dancing across her skin.
Harry’s eyes raked over her naked flesh and he grinned at her. “Well, breakfast can maybe wait. I think I want to start here.”
He moved quickly, covering her body with his own and pressing a hard kiss to her lips before he proceeded to enjoy her for breakfast.
Chapter Thirty
Harry
“Dude, what the fuck is your problem?”
Harry paused his scrubbing of the kitchen counter to look at Jax who was standing in the doorway staring at him with wide eyes.
“What do you mean?” Harry asked, returning to his task.
Though he and Jax weren’t slobs, their kitchen looked like a nuclear war zone and required quite a bit of elbow grease to get the stains out.
“You should be wearing an apron. Then you’d fit the stereotype.”
Harry sighed and stopped working again to look at Jax. “I’m not sure what my response to that should be except that I have no problem with it since I’m making sure this place looks nice. Which is more than I can say when you have someone over.” Harry shot Jax a hard look, knowing he got the implication. Though Jax didn’t have Karlie over often, when she was over, Jax did the bare minimum to prepare. Harry had caught more than one look from Karlie that conveyed her horror at the state of the house.
He didn’t want Bailey to have the same reaction. Yeah, she’d been there before and hadn’t commented. But that visit wasn’t anything like the one that was happening today. Today she was coming over as his girlfriend. Officially. The other band members were coming and so was Karlie. This was a big deal and he wanted it to go off without a hitch.
Grayson was going to man the monstrous grill Jax insisted on buying the year before and hadn’t bothered to figure out. Beers were chilling in ice in the cooler out back. Besides scrubbing some stuff, they were ready.
Jax rolled his eyes. “Just clean up the shit and call it a day.”
He shrugged and Harry shook his head. “I dread the day you and Karlie move in together and she realizes what a slob you are.”
Jax paled and pulled on the collar of his shirt. “Move in? Did she say somethin’?”
Harry chuckled at the panic on Jax’s face. Trust talk of the future to get him worked up. “She didn’t. But isn’t it a natural progression?”
Jax wrinkled his nose. “Maybe, but it’s a ways off. Beer outside?”
“Yeah.”
Harry sighed as he watched his best friend push through the back screen door. Jax was a great guy, but a bit slow. Just look at what happened when he and Karlie got together the first time. He blew it because he didn’t understand his own feelings for her. When he truly realized the depth of his relationship, Jax would probably lose it for a bit. It would be entertaining to see him fight it though.
A knock sounded at the door and Harry cleaned up the little mess that was left and stashed everything before going to open it. Bailey and Karlie were on the other side.
“Jax is out back,” he told Karlie before turning to Bailey.
Karlie’s footsteps faded as Harry smiled at her. “Hey, you, long time no see.”
She laughed and shook her head. “I just saw you yesterday, you doofus.”
He shrugged. “And? It was a long time.” He reached out and pulled her to him, wrapping her in his arms. “Hey,” he whispered, kissing her lightly.
“Hey, yourself,” she whispered back.
A throat clearing broke into their moment and Harry pulled back to see Grayson and Bentley standing there with smirks on their face.
“Is it that type of party, then?” Grayson asked, winking at the two of them.
Harry rolled his eyes and moved the two of them to the side so the brothers could enter.
“Don’t stop on our account,” Bentley said as he passed. “I like to watch.”
Bailey gasped and Harry glared. While they were just being themselves, he felt their relationship too new to deal with such joking.
“Everyone is already out back,” he told them, anger simmering just below the surface. Yeah, it was teasing, but he didn’t want to hear it.
The brothers laughed as they walked to the back and outside. Harry turned to Bailey to apologize but was stopped by the appearance of Veronica in the doorway. She was still wan looking and he frowned as he realized she looked stressed as well.
“Ignore them,” she said, stepping through the door. “They’re just jealous. I’m happy for y’all.”
Not waiting for a response, she hurried through the house and out the back.
Harry turned back to Bailey. “Shall we join them?”
Bailey bit her lip and lowered her lashes as she fiddled with the hem of his shirt. Unless he was reading signals wrong, he would swear she was turned on. He narrowed his eyes. “What’s up?”
She looked at him through her lashes and desire shot straight down to his dick, which was now standing at attention. He was acutely aware of her hand now slowly tracing the waist of his jeans and creeping lower to trace the outline of his arousal.
No words were necessary. He got it loud and clear. He pushed the front door closed and spun, grasping Bailey’s hand and pulling her behind him into his room. He shut and locked the door. He wouldn’t put it past someone to barge in while they were in the middle of something.
Once the door was shut, Bailey turned into a wildcat, pulling his shirt off and quickly ridding him of his pants and underwear, leaving him naked and her fully clothed. He went to pull her shirt off, but she slapped his hands away and dropped to her knees.
His erection bobbed as he realized what she was about to do. One hand grasped his cock while the other fondled his balls. The tip of her tongue snuck past her lip and lightly licked the tip. He groaned at the sensation, wanting
her to do more.
The hand on his shaft squeezed and she sucked his tip into her mouth. Warmth enveloped him and it took everything in him not to wrap her hair around his fist and push the rest of the way in.
She slowly worked her mouth up and down in small movements, driving him mad. Without warning, she put as much of him as possible into her mouth and used her hand on the rest. He couldn’t resist any further as she worked him over. He thrust into her mouth and threaded his fingers through her hair, lightly guiding her to where he wanted her.
He bit his lip to keep himself from making too much noise, very aware of how likely it was someone would hear them. If he was honest, the thought of someone realizing what they were up to excited him further.
He could feel his orgasm fast approaching and didn’t want to end things just yet. He pulled Bailey from him, which was a feat in itself as she fought him the whole way. He pushed her toward the bed while he went to his bedside table to retrieve a condom.
Once he rolled it on, he joined her on the bed, kneeling beside her and raking his gaze over her body. Her body was athletic with long, lean muscles. Her breasts were a perfect handful with dusky little nipples pebbled at the top just begging to be sucked. Tanned skin from the summer begged to be caressed and it all led down to the promised land, her center with a neatly trimmed little landing strip calling to him.
He longed to sink into her but he had to taste her first. He leaned down and sucked a nipple into his mouth, laving it with his tongue before moving to the next one. She ran her fingers through his hair as he paid homage to her breasts.
He then shifted so he was between her legs and kissed his way leisurely down her stomach to her center. He spread her legs further apart before taking his fingers and spreading her open in front of his face, breathing in the musky scent of her desire.
Bailey moaned above him and wiggled her butt. “Come on,” she moaned, trying to move closer to his mouth.
Harry chuckled. “Make sure you keep it down. Don’t want to bring people runnin’ for a show.”