The Album: What happens when you fall in love with a rock star? (Cruise Control Book 1)

by Sian Ceinwen

  “He’s cheated on her with three different women to my knowledge, though from what I know, he hasn’t done it at all in the last seven years. They’ve had therapy together, and she’s forgiven him. They’re in a pretty good place now.

  “That doesn’t stop the stories, though. Every time he’s even just a little bit too close to a woman, they publish another story. It doesn’t matter that it’s not true; they just make shit up to sell magazines or get clicks. My cousins, who I absolutely love to death, have grown up seeing this bullshit about their family time and time again. They caught hell at school, and I know it’s embarrassing, and it gets them down. It’s just a life that I swore I would never have for myself.”

  There was silence as she finished her explanation. He took a moment to process what she’d told him. She had never told anyone about this. It was a well-known family secret that none of them really ever talked about. If it was mentioned, it was generally just referred to as “the news” and not openly discussed.

  “That explains so much,” Gabriel said, finally. “There’s one thing that I don’t understand, though, Ari.”

  “What?”

  “I don’t get why you ever agreed to go on a date with me in the first place.” He shrugged in confusion.

  “As if I even had a choice,” she replied without thinking.

  “What do you mean by that?”

  Ariana panicked. She wasn’t ready to answer that question. She couldn’t tell him that the magnetic pull that she felt towards him was so strong that it had made her ignore the thing that was literally her biggest fear. That even now, after the horrendous experience tonight, she would still want to keep seeing him.

  How could she tell him that it made her sick to think about life in the public eye but that the thought of ending it, of never seeing or talking to Gabriel again, made her feel worse? Her aunt and uncle might be fine now, but that didn’t mean that she hadn’t watched what living that kind of life did to people. The media could be so intrusive at times, and would often stop at no lengths to get some kind of story about her family.

  She knew that Gabriel was going on tour when she’d met him, and she had still got involved with him even knowing he was leaving. She had been thinking about this point a lot lately. It was something she struggled with because she wanted to keep seeing him but was painfully aware that they would be separated very soon. She took a deep breath and started the conversation that she’d been avoiding until now.

  “It doesn’t matter, really,” she said, sadly. “I’m enjoying spending time with you, but I’m hyper-aware that in two weeks you’re going to be leaving to go on tour for months on end. I mean, I hate to say it, but in the face of that fact, what we have can’t really go anywhere until you come back, anyway. So why would I be expected to give up my privacy and lifestyle for the sake of a night or two out a week before you leave me?”

  Gabriel looked completely floored by her speech, as though he hadn’t considered what would happen once he went on tour.

  “You don’t think what we have can go anywhere?” He blinked.

  “Well, not until you come back. I can’t commit to anything, and I wouldn’t want you to, either. You’re a famous rock star, and you’re about to go on your first tour. How could I expect you to stay faithful to a person you’ve barely started dating? It’s not your fault, and it’s not my fault, we just have super shitty timing.”

  “I don’t know what to say.” Gabriel’s voice sounded flat. “It sounds like you’ve really given this some thought.”

  “It’s been on my mind for a while, yes,” she replied. “I don’t want to end all contact with you while you’re on tour. I still want to talk to you, we can email and text and call each other, but we’ll just be friends—we won’t be tied to each other.”

  “And you want this arrangement not so that you can sleep with other men but so that I can sleep with other women?” He sounded incredulous.

  “That’s correct.”

  Ariana hated the idea of him sleeping with other women. The thought of him touching anyone but her made her feel unbearably sad, but there was no way that she could or would stop him.

  “There is another option that you haven’t considered, you know,” he told her.

  “What would that be? I won’t tie you down, Gabe, I just won’t.”

  He shrugged. “You could always come with me.”

  “Come with you?” It was Ariana’s turn to be shocked.

  “Yeah, Harrison’s bringing Heather with him, I don’t see why I couldn’t bring you.”

  Ariana was so shocked that she barely noticed that he had all but referred to her as his girlfriend.

  “We’ve only known each other for a month, though. I have to stay here and get a job and…” she trailed off, too stunned to continue.

  “We could get to know each other better on the road than we could by being ‘long-distance friends’—” he used air quotations around the phrase “—and you can get a job when you get back, heck you could even use your time on the road to do some writing, maybe you could write a novel. Who knows? The world is your oyster, sweetheart. You just have to pick the pearl you want.”

  “How did we go from paparazzi attacking us to the idea of me coming on tour with you?” She asked him.

  “Easily. They’re intertwined. You don’t need to worry about the paparazzi on tour, and everyone’s told us that it’s far more low-key. We’re traveling on buses, and there are so many people who are coming with us on the tour that they’re not going to pick you out as being with me as long as we don’t have too much contact in public.”

  “I’m not sure about this,” she told him.

  “You don’t have to answer right now, just think about it. You spent time thinking about splitting up with me, now spend some time thinking about staying together.” He smiled dolefully at her.

  “Okay.”

  He put his arm around her, and she relaxed into him, letting her eyes close. She was tired, and she had a lot to think about. Could she really just pack up her life and go on tour with Cruise Control? All for a man she’d known approximately five seconds? They arrived at her apartment and shared a passionate kiss. All of the tension in her body melted away as his tongue explored her mouth.

  “Please, Ari,” he pleaded, “just think about it.”

  She wasn’t ready for their night to end, and she definitely didn’t want to head up to her apartment without him.

  “Come upstairs with me?” she asked him. “We can talk about it some more.”

  “Sure.”

  He followed her out of the limousine and up the stairs to her apartment. She unlocked the door and let them inside.

  “Do you want something to drink?” she asked him.

  “Not really.”

  His eyes were dark, and she felt desire wash over her as she realized immediately that they were finally alone together in her apartment, with no obligations to be anywhere else.

  “We should talk,” she murmured.

  “Yes, we should,” he replied, walking over to her.

  He rested his hand on the side of her face and rubbed her bottom lip softly with his thumb.

  “What did you want to talk about, Ari?”

  He leaned down and kissed her neck softly before pulling back to look her in the eyes again as he put his hands on her shoulders and began stroking softly up and down her arms.

  “Come with me.”

  That was all Ariana said as she took his hand and led him to her bedroom.

  They stopped next to the bed, and he slowly unzipped her dress, pushed the straps off her shoulders, and let it pool at her feet. She could feel her nipples puckering against her bra, and her panties got damp as his gaze roamed over her.

  Gabriel kissed her and Ariana felt the fire burning deep within her. He stripped naked before laying down on her bed and slipping a condom onto his hard erection. She reveled in the feeling of having him inside her as she slid herself onto him. They moved back and
forth in rhythm until she was moaning his name when she came, and he came soon after.

  When they were lying together in bed later, he said, “tell me that you’ll come on tour with us. I am not ready to give you up, sweetheart.”

  She considered the situation. Her fears of his lifestyle were very, very real, but she didn’t really have anything holding her here. The temptation of a life where she could be with him and have this every day was so strong. The thought of being separated from Gabriel for the entire length of their tour was painful, as well. She knew that phone calls and texts could never substitute for what she’d just experienced.

  “I’ll think about it.”

  She didn’t get a chance to say any more than that before he lowered his mouth back to hers, and they started round two.

  Ariana argued with herself for days amidst messages and phone calls from Gabriel, discussing the idea of her coming on tour with them. Ultimately, the lure of the excitement of going on tour with Cruise Control won out against her more sensible self, and she agreed to go with them two days before they left for the tour. She found a sub-lease for her apartment and took off on tour with a rock star.

  The Fifth Song

  The first week on tour with the band; Ariana had started to get to know the other members. She’d spent quite a bit of time hanging out with Harrison’s girlfriend, Heather. She was the same age as the guys, so older than Ariana by a few years, but they got along really well. They were often left at a loose end when the guys were busy doing soundchecks or interviews, so it was nice to have someone to talk to.

  During the concerts the previous week, Ariana had just hung out backstage with the rest of the crew. From there, she was able to see what was happening on stage, but Ariana hadn’t felt like braving the crowd. Last night, though, they’d all gone out to dinner together, and Heather had convinced her to head into the Pit tonight and watch the show with her. She wasn’t sure what to expect, but she was eager to see Gabriel perform again.

  The backstage area was in the midst of its usual pre-show chaos. People were running back and forth throughout the area, getting instruments, outfits, and equipment as necessary. Ariana sat down on a wooden chair at the stairs to the stage, trying to stay out of the way until the show started.

  Her phone pinged, and she looked down at a text from her mom.

  Hi, honey. How are you?

  Her parents had been shocked when she’d announced that she was joining Cruise Control on tour. She hadn’t even really told any of her family or friends about dating Gabriel. Aunt Susan vaguely knew because she had been there when he first asked her out, but she was great about giving Ariana privacy.

  It was completely out of character for sensible Ariana to do something crazy like this. There were quite a few lengthy discussions with her parents, where they wanted to make sure that she’d thought everything through properly. They knew that she was an adult, so it wasn’t like they could stop her from going, but through those conversations, Ariana had agreed that she would stay in touch to keep her parents’ minds at ease.

  Going great. Hope everything’s good at home.

  She sat there for around fifteen minutes, texting back and forth with her mom before she saw Gabriel heading towards her with the other guys in his wake. He was wearing a tight blue T-shirt that showed off his developed upper body, paired with a pair of black jeans and blue Nikes.

  “Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted her, “are you ready for the show?”

  “I sure am,” she stood up, and he gave her a hug and kissed her firmly on the lips.

  “I’ll try not to let you down.”

  “As if you could. You’re going to rock.”

  Cooper Powell, the band’s manager, joined their group then. Cooper exuded wealth and, not for the first time, Ariana wondered how much money he would be making off Cruise Control’s success. She just felt that whenever she saw him, he treated the band like they were nothing more than a product that was his job to sell to the public.

  She stood next to Gabriel as a circle formed with everyone backstage. Cooper gave a speech about how they were going to have an amazing night tonight and for everyone to keep their energy levels high. The opening act came off stage, and high fives were exchanged.

  Everything became a bustle of movement again as the roadies were spurred into action. They started bringing the opening act’s equipment off the stage piece by piece, replacing it with the items for Cruise Control’s set.

  It took roughly ten minutes for them to be finished, during which time Gabriel did some vocal exercises, Hayden tapped one of the benches with his drum sticks, and Sebastian and Harrison both rechecked their already perfectly tuned guitars before the roadies took them onstage for use. After they received the all-clear to go on, Ariana heard Heather’s voice in her ear.

  “We should probably head out now.”

  Heather was a pretty woman, tall and willowy with long, blond hair that fell in waves around her shoulders. She was incredibly nice, too, and had really helped Ariana adjust to life on the road in the last week. Ariana could see why Harrison liked her.

  “Yeah, I guess we should,” she said unenthusiastically.

  “Cheer up; it won’t be as bad as you think. Security is always there if things get out of hand, and, for the most part, the girls can’t even see you.”

  Ariana watched Gabriel stride confidently up the stairs to the stage as she and Heather headed towards the exit from backstage into the main arena, and she could hear the audience murmuring excitedly. They walked around a corner and came out with the entire stadium in view.

  “Whoa,” was all that Ariana could manage.

  She had known that Cruise Control had sold out most of their shows; she’d even failed to get a ticket to their first show in Chicago herself, but seeing a packed stadium blew her mind, really hammering home that Gabriel was kind of a big deal to a lot of people.

  They walked past the security guards that were blocking off the backstage area to the fans and headed towards the front of the stage. They showed their VIP passes to the security guards here, and gained access to the Pit. That was what they called the area between the fence holding back the general admission crowd and the stage.

  There were two stools at center stage that they sat on. When they took their seats, the lights hadn’t yet gone down, and she heard the conversations of the girls behind her.

  “Who are they?” one girl asked.

  “Competition winners?” another one asked.

  “Lucky bitches,” the first girl said.

  Ariana and Heather smiled at each other because maybe they were ‘lucky bitches,’ it wasn’t a bad life on the road with a rock star. Ariana was about to turn and say something nice to the girls when another one chimed in.

  “What skanks. I bet you they blew one of the security guards to get in there.”

  Ariana kept her face firmly forward. Surely the girls knew they could hear them, and she didn’t want to give them any further ammunition by responding.

  “They probably slept with half the security team.”

  “They think they’re so special, sitting there like their shit don’t stink.”

  Ariana snuck a glance at Heather, who looked as shocked as Ariana.

  “Has it ever been like this before?” Ariana asked her quietly.

  “Never,” Heather replied simply.

  Heather and Harrison had been dating for years—they were high school sweethearts, and everyone was waiting for an engagement to happen. Since they’d been together so long, she’d been to many Cruise Control concerts. The band had now reached a whole new level of fame, however, and with that kind of fame came a whole new breed of fans.

  Ariana disliked this intensely. She was reminded of why she’d been hesitant to get involved with someone in the limelight. She’d seen firsthand what it could do to a person, but she had still chosen to walk this path.

  She was relieved when the lights went down, and the entire crowd screamed in unison, dr
owning out the vitriol spewing from the girls behind them. The curtains were pulled back, and Gabriel came into Ariana’s view.

  She was amazed by the change that came over him when he was on stage. He was vibrant and beautiful. The stage lights shone down on him, giving him an alluring, golden glow. He moved from side to side of the stage as though he were a caged lion ready to pounce at an unexpected moment.

  Occasionally, their eyes would meet, and Ariana would catch her breath. He was so magnificent, and she ached to be in his arms again. She could hardly believe that this man was hers. Even being this close to him, she felt the pull towards him. It soothed her nerves, and her fears about being with a celebrity were calmed purely by his presence, even when that presence was performing in front of thousands of fans.

  The screaming from the crowd between songs was phenomenal and intense enough to make Ariana put her hands to her ears and readjust her earplugs. Looking over at Heather, she saw her looking at Harrison with such love that it seemed too intimate to comment on. She wondered if that was the look she wore when she was watching Gabriel.

  It was great being on the road, but a part of her wondered when it was going to end. She felt as though this was some break from the reality of her life and as much fun as she was having; deep down, she felt as though it wasn’t going to last forever.

  She’d known Gabriel for less than two months, but she knew herself well enough to know that she was falling for him. Perhaps she had been in love in the past with previous boyfriends, but this felt different. She wouldn’t dare say that she was in love with him just yet, though. It was scary enough telling your average boyfriend that you loved him, but this was Gabriel Knight.

  Often, she wondered if perhaps she was in love with the idea of him, the godlike rock star who could offer her the world. Despite her fears of celebrity, it was still pretty intoxicating to be around him when he was like that. Other times, she felt like she was really getting to know the Gabe behind the stage persona. She’d only been a part of his world for such a short time, but she felt like she was a mess of emotions that she couldn’t possibly sort out.