Unstoppable Liv Beaufont Boxed Set

by Sarah Noffke

  Mortimer held up his hand to stop her. “The less I know, the better. All I know is that Liv Beaufont treats brownies with consideration, not pressing her rule upon us like so many Warriors before her. Also, we watch you at John’s shop, and you have a true heart. Although you’re not a mortal, we think of you fondly.”

  “Thank you?” Liv responded tentatively.

  “So, yes,” Mortimer said with an expression that sort of resembled a smile. “I agree that my brownies will help you get the sword from the museum, but you should know that even with their help, it’s going to be a very risky venture.”

  Liv nodded, having sensed that was going to be the case. And if she was caught a second time breaking into that museum and with the help of brownies, Adler was going to have her head—or her magic.

  “If we can secure the sword, I’ll take the risk,” Liv stated confidently.

  Mortimer picked up a single piece of paper from the chaos on his desk and handed it to her. “Then you should see this. I’ve drafted a plan that I think will work if you can pull off the rest.”

  Liv’s eyes scanned the paper briefly, and her mouth fell open. “Damn. It will be a miracle if we pull this off.”

  Mortimer agreed as he continued to throw the ball. “This sword must mean a great deal to you to go to such great lengths. Does that mean you agree to the plan?”

  Liv glanced at the paper one more time. “Yeah, let’s do it!”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Liv halted inside the Wishing Well. She shouldn’t have been surprised to find a well in the middle of the pub, with fairies filling little cups up from it and flying them off to patrons, and yet she couldn’t look away. The ceiling had been enchanted to look like a starry sky, and the walls were painted in rolling meadows that went on for miles. The music that rose from the piano in the corner was a bit too whimsical for her liking, but she still found herself swaying to the beat.

  “Does my lady approve of this place?” Rudolf asked, appearing suddenly beside Liv.

  A tiny fairy holding a harp began to twirl around Liv’s head as she played, her giggling accompanying the music.

  Liv swatted at her like she was a fly. “Yeah, no. Can we go someplace that doesn’t make me want to throw up?”

  “But they have chocolate-dipped…” Rudolf, reading the expression on her face, let his voice trail off. “Yeah, that’s fine. Maybe something in your neck of the woods?”

  Liv rolled her eyes. “The pun is not appreciated,” she said, eyeing the seemingly real trees that towered around the pub. “There’s a bar down the street from my house. It’s called No More Heroes.”

  Rudolf’s face contorted with distaste. “What kind of place is that? I’m not sure I approve.”

  “Well, those are the terms of my agreement,” Liv said simply, creating a portal and looking back at him before stepping through. “Either you join me or the deal is off.”

  “I don’t understand the décor,” Rudolf said when they entered the bar. It was non-pretentious. Minimalistic. Warm and inviting.

  Long tables with small stools ran the length of the space, and the green booths that lined the wall looked as old as the paisley wallpaper.

  “Where is the flowing river of apple cider or the centaur that spits wine into your mouth?” Rudolf asked, striding behind Liv as she found them a place at the bar. Most of the women turned to eye him, giving the fae appreciative looks.

  “It’s not that kind of place,” Liv stated, hopping up on the stool. “What you see is what you get here.” She sighed, enjoying being in a normal place with normal people.

  The guy next to her turned around and gave her an apologetic look. “Oh, you can’t sit there. My aura needs a bit of extra space today. It’s feeling fat.”

  Well, sort of normal. LA normal, as if that were a thing. Liv shook her head at the hipster. “Tell it too bad. This is my seat.”

  He bristled but turned back to his date without argument.

  “I’m happy to fight for your honor, my lady,” Rudolf said, pulling out a seat and looking between her and the hipster.

  She shook her head. “No one fights with hipsters. If you do, you run the risk of wrinkling their shirt or scuffing their Doc Martens, and the whining never stops after that. It’s better to ignore them. They’re afraid of their own shadows and anything from last year.”

  “This mortal lifestyle you live is very strange,” Rudolf said, sliding onto the barstool.

  Liv held up her hand to the bartender, a slender lady who had hair extensions and was wearing a tight shirt that read Certified Organic.

  She ignored Liv, sending drinks over to a couple who were chatting animatedly as they watched something on one of their phones.

  “So, why exactly did you make me go out with you?” Liv asked, looking at the fae.

  His eyes bounced around the various patrons in the bar before looking directly at her. “Most would find this to be a great honor, and yet you see it as an obligation.”

  Liv’s stomach rumbled, and she tried again to get the bimbo-bartender’s attention.

  “I remember that when I was your age, I took for granted the attention of elders such as I,” Rudolf continued.

  “Wait, now I’m young?” Liv asked. “I thought I was on the brink of being too old and withered for you?”

  “Oh, that day will come, my love. That day will come, and unfortunately, not long from now. But we have tonight.” Rudolf reached out and tried to run his fingers through Liv’s hair but she blocked, him, knocking his arm to the bar. She pinned it down, making it impossible for him to move.

  “If you ever touch me again, I will pluck each of your long eyelashes out with my teeth and feed them to seagulls. Are we clear?”

  Rudolf retracted his arm, a scorned look on his face. “My lady, I think you misunderstand my gestures. I only mean to make you swoon and fall irrevocably in love with me.”

  Liv turned to face the bar. “Yeah, I don’t think I will.” She tried again to get the bartender’s attention, with no luck. “Damn it! Am I invisible?”

  “If you are, it’s the worst invisibility spell I’ve ever seen,” Rudolf said, waving his fingers slightly. The bartender looked up as if someone had shouted her name, her attention landing directly on the fae. She set down the drinks she was in the middle of making and hurried over.

  “Hello, my dear mortal,” Rudolf began, his tone melodic.

  “What can I get for you?” the woman asked, bending low over the bar, her cleavage popping out.

  Rudolf leaned away and waved in Liv’s direction. “Whatever my saucy friend would like.”

  Liv slapped her hand on the bar. “About damn time. Yes, I’d like nachos, and not spa nachos with cauliflower and vegan cheese. I want the real thing. And a side of fries. A rum and coke. No, make it two rum and cokes. Oh, and a side of bacon. No, make it two sides of bacon.”

  Not having written down anything, the bartender looked at Rudolf. “For you, sir?”

  “I’ll have water,” he said politely. “You do have that here? Is it safe to drink?”

  She giggled as if he’d told a joke. “Of course. This isn’t North Hollywood.”

  Liv refused to talk to the fae until she’d crammed three strips of bacon into her mouth and finished her first rum and coke. Feeling more herself, she glanced at Rudolf, who was regarding her with a serene smile.

  “You are the freshest specimen I’ve set my eyes on in a very long time!” he told her, leaning his head on his palm and gazing longingly at her.

  Liv wiped her mouth with the back of her sleeve and burped loudly, making several nearby patrons turn and give her rude stares.

  “What exactly is your deal?” she asked, pushing the empty plate of bacon out of the way to make way for the pile of nachos that was the size of a small bulldog.

  “Actually, that’s the reason I asked you on this date.”

  “It’s not a date,” she responded, picking the best place to attack the nachos from. “And y
ou didn’t ask. You demanded, and then sent a threatening note to my place of work.”

  Rudolf watched as Liv crammed three chips into her mouth at once. “What business do you have with the brownies?”

  “Reg-tion tip tuf,” she said with her mouth still full.

  He nodded. “Oh, right. You’re going to have me believe that you’re working on House business, are you?”

  “Why else would I squeeze my ass through those tiny doors and sit in a dusty office with a smelly elf?”

  “It has occurred to me, Ms. Liv Beaufont, Warrior of the House of Seven, that you are different from most magicians,” Rudolf said, picking up his water glass and eyeing it. Then, seemingly thinking better of it, he set it back down. “What is your story, and how may I help you?”

  Liv shook her head, pushing the nachos away, feeling her stomach expand. “Oh, no. I know better now than to enter into any agreement with you.”

  “Not all agreements with a fae are bad,” he reasoned. “Is it so terrible that you’re in my presence now?”

  “Well, I just lost my appetite, so yes.”

  “That’s because you’ve had enough bacon to kill a horse,” Rudolf informed her.

  “Horses don’t eat bacon,” Liv stated.

  “My point is that since I’ve seen that ring of yours, well, it’s caused a certain reaction in me.”

  Liv straightened. “Wait, that’s your point? That wasn’t what you were saying a second ago. I didn’t know any of this was about my ring.”

  “Well, you do now,” Rudolf said definitively. “And it’s true. I can’t recall the memory linked to that ring, and that bothers me very much. I almost feel as though, well, I have an excellent memory, but it feels as though I’ve forgotten something. And it’s not a regrettable decision like making out with an elf or playing hopscotch with a gnome. Oh, no, this feels like something I forgot without meaning to.”

  Liv leaned forward and grabbed Rudolf’s shirt, pulling him closer. “Are you serious? Like there’s something someone covered up?”

  Rudolf didn’t seem to mind her forceful gesture. He actually leaned closer to her. “I do like your style, but wish we were in a more fitting setting. Preferably my place? Yours, I suspect, is much too small for such activities.”

  Liv pushed him away. “Be serious. What are you trying to tell me?”

  Rudolf straightened his tunic. “I’m not entirely sure. I was uncertain whether to say anything at all. However, you seem to be an honorable magician, and I did respect your family once. And I suppose this is a mystery we all need to solve since my suspicion is that it involves us all, or at least more than just you and the magicians.”

  Liv turned and faced him directly. “So, are you saying you’re going to help me?”

  He thought for a moment. “I’m not sure what I’m helping you with.”

  “The ring,” Liv stated, pulling it from her pants and showing it to him. “I know it’s supposed to tell me something. Maybe multiple somethings. And if it causes a reaction in you, then there might be all sorts of things it will uncover. But I’m new to this, and I don’t know where to look. And now you’re saying it made you remember something you forgot. I think that’s worth investigating.”

  Rudolf’s gaze stayed on the ring for a long moment, then he looked at her directly. “I think you’re right, Liv. I think that there is much the ring can tell you.”

  “Will you help me?”

  His eyebrow arched as he gave her a wolfish grin. “Be careful what you ask from a fae.”

  Liv sank back on her stool. “Never mind, then. I can’t afford to be your servant for a dozen years or whatever you’d have me do.”

  She was putting the ring back in her pocket when Rudolf reached out and grabbed her hand. “This isn’t an agreement. You have my word on that. I suspect there is something at play much bigger than you, or maybe even me. For that reason, yes, Liv Beaufont, Warrior of the House of Seven, I will try to help you.”

  Liv stared at the fae for several long seconds before nodding. “So what does that mean?”

  He released her hand. “I’m not certain yet. I’ll try to remember what I have forgotten—the memory associated with the ring. I’ll do what I can, but I fear I might remember a hundred years too late, and that will do you no good since you’ll be—”

  “Old and gray,” Liv said, cutting him off. “Yeah, that’s a chance I’ll have to take.” She held out her hand to him. “And you have yourself a deal.”

  He didn’t take her hand but rather smiled widely at her. “Oh, a deal means we mutually benefit. So what is it that you offer, my sweet?”

  “What is it that you want?” Liv asked. “And if you say my servitude or firstborn, no deal.”

  “Something that has long resided in the House of Seven,” Rudolf answered. “Upon the time that I remember that which I’ve been forced to forget—a memory I believe has been erased from the minds of all fae and other creatures alike—I ask that you reunite me with the treasure that lives in the ponds of the House of Seven.”

  Liv waited for Rudolf to laugh and say he was just kidding. When he didn’t, she lowered her chin and said, “Are you flipping serious? You want me to reunite you with that monster? It once tried to drown me.”

  “I wouldn’t call it a monster,” Rudolf countered. “It’s a small trinket, taken away from me long ago. I know it resides at the bottom of the pond, although the wards on the House of Seven prevent me from getting to it myself. But you… You could dive down there and get it for me.”

  “And face the monster,” Liv reminded him.

  He nodded. “Yes. It will be difficult for you, but it’s a fair deal. My memories will shine a light on what you need to know, and freeing that creature will be good for all.”

  Liv didn’t know what possessed her, but she extended her hand and offered it to Rudolf. “Fine. You have yourself a deal.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  “You did what?” Rory yelled, his face blossoming into an awful shade of red. “Are you insane?”

  Liv put down Junebug, who immediately ran off on some cunning mission. The kitten had figured out how to get into closed drawers and scale the drapes so he could sleep in a bowl on the top of the hutch in the kitchen. Of course, when he awoke with a start, the bowl fell over the edge, crashing to the floor and sending shards of glass everywhere. The kitten was unharmed, having landed on his feet.

  “Rudolf said he could help me.” Liv stood looking up at the giant, who had his shoulders pinned up by his ears. “Don’t you find it incredibly strange that he admits there’s something connected to the ring blocked in his memory?”

  Liv pulled her mother’s ring out of her pocket and thrust it up so that Rory could see it better. He flinched as if the sight caused him sudden pain. “There is something strange about the ring, I’ll admit.”

  “So maybe you have a memory blocked, too.”

  Rory looked away from the ring, shaking his head. “It’s all just speculation. How do you know that what he remembers will be true and not something he made up?”

  “Because…because…” Liv’s voice trailed away since she was unable to find an adequate reply to the question.

  “Don’t you know that you’re never supposed to enter into an agreement with a fae?”

  “Yes, I know it’s binding,” Liv said, yawning. “I wouldn’t have even been there talking to him if I hadn’t unknowingly entered into an agreement with him already.”

  Rory sighed dramatically, throwing his hands up in the air, his fingertips nearly brushing the ceiling. “Oh, no, this wasn’t the first time you agreed to something with a fae?”

  Liv blushed. “He said we should get a drink and I said sure. I had no intention of doing it, but when I found out that—”

  “Not doing so would end in servitude,” Rory interrupted her.

  “Yeah. How was I supposed to know?”

  Bending over, Rory picked up Junebug as he scaled the furniture on his way to the man
tle over the fireplace. “You’d know that if you had read the book I gave you.”

  Liv didn’t have an answer for that. “Look, if the Fae remembers what he’s forgotten, I’ll make good on my promise.”

  “How?”

  She thought for a moment. “I don’t know. I guess I’ll go fishing in the pond at the House of Seven.”

  “You do realize that if you aren’t able to give him what you promised, you’ll be—”

  “His servant,” Liv said, cutting him off this time.

  “You’re not taking this seriously enough,” Rory said, more worked up than she’d ever seen him. “The fae aren’t to be messed with. The fact that you spoke to him in the first place is worrisome. You should have known better.”

  “In my defense, he spoke to me first,” Liv said, watching as two kittens wrestled on the hearth of the fireplace. Finally she pulled her gaze away and held up the ring again. “What do you think about the wall with the grooves in the library?”

  Rory relinquished a bit of his anger and sighed. “I’m not sure. You’re going to have to check it out more thoroughly, but make sure you’re not watched. That’s important.”

  Liv nodded. “Yeah, I agree. I’ll try to stop by there tonight before the heist and check it out.”

  Rory’s head flipped up suddenly. “Heist?”

  “Yeah, I partnered with brownies to break into the Natural History Museum. No big deal. Just risking my life for something you hold valuable.”

  “Well, don’t get caught,” Rory stated matter-of-factly. “I want that sword.”

  “Your consideration and concern are overwhelming,” Liv joked.

  “You’re a big girl and can handle yourself.”

  “Funny that you berate me for making a deal with a fae but don’t even blink when you learn that I’m working with other magical creatures on a major break-in.”

  “Fae can’t be trusted,” Rory stated. “Brownies don’t have any side agendas. They are simply dumb creatures. And your mission to recover the sword is important—”